I received this e-mail from a friend of mine. Turns out this event actually occured in our very own Target?! Thought that this was hilarious. This is one bored guy who likes to play practical jokes in Target. Read on....
After I retired, my wife insisted that I accompany her on her trips to Target. Unfortunately, like most men, I found shopping boring and preferred to get in and get out. Equally unfortunate, my wife is like most women - she loves to browse.
Yesterday my dear wife received the following letter from the local Target.
Over the past six months, your husband has caused quite a commotion in our store. We cannot tolerate this behavior and have been forced to ban both of you from the store. Our complaints against your husband, Mr. Samsel, are listed below and are documented by our video surveillance cameras.
1. June 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in other people's carts when they weren't looking.
2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals
3. July 7: He made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the women's restroom.
4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official voice, 'Code 3 in Housewares. Get on it right away! This caused the employee to leave her assigned station and receive a reprimand from her Supervisor that in turn resulted with a union grievance, causing management to lose time and costing the company money.
5. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and tried to put a bag of M&Ms on layaway.
6. August 14: Moved a 'CAUTION- WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
7. August 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told the children shoppers he'd invite them in if they would bring pillows and blankets from the bedding department to which twenty children obliged.
8. August 23: When a clerk asked if they could help him he began crying and screamed, 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?' EMTs were called.
9. September 4: Looked right into the security camera and used it as a mirror while he picked his nose.
10. September 10: While handling guns in the hunting department, he asked the clerk where the antidepressants were.
11. October 3: Darted around the store suspiciously while loudly humming the 'Mission Impossible' theme.
12. October 6: In the auto department, he practiced his 'Madonna look' by using different sizes of 20 funnels.
13. October 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed through, yelled 'PICK ME! PICK ME!'
14. October 21: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he assumed a fetal position and screamed 'OH NO! IT'S THOSE VOICES AGAIN!'
And last, but not least:
15. October 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited awhile, then yelled very loudly, 'Hey! There's no toilet paper in here.' One of
the clerks passed out.
1420-A East Fire Tower Road
Greenville, NC 27858
Phone (252) 321-5021
This is too funny, May! Now I'm jealous that I didn't come up with these ideas! I love getting kicked out of retail venues. It pokes fun of the seriousness of business and spices up what is normally mundane!
That would've been awesome! Beats having to read them dreadful news!
lol so true mayhmong so true. we all need a good laugh.
hey dohn go out and do some of those things and make sure to get it online so we can read it HAHA
I think his gf would kill him if he attempts any one of them?!
oooo that would be a good one lol
or if you go to a resturant ask for tums with your meal
LOL. Makes me glad that my husband can't read this. He usually goes out of the store where I'm shopping. If he gets to read this...LOL
haven't seen such hilarious thing in ages. Thanx for sharing.
But its too short.
would love to read more of these.
Very funny (all of them). For some reason, the M&M's on lay-away particularly struck me.
imadork, sorry to hear that!
sweetiepie, a handmade card would be sweet, but if its made out of something else...hmmm..
My sister is a holiday shopaholic and thinks I am cheap to only make people cards. The way I see it people already have lots of material possessions they end up getting rid of anyway, so why add more to the pile? When I made her handmade cards she was highly disappointed .
The best way to end a womans shopping spree is to say everything she tries on makes her look fat. I wouldn't do it because my wife hits but I've heard it works.
My sister likes to buy people expensive gifts around the holidays, when she knows others are not going to do the same for her. Once she bought a hundred and fifty dollar Irish storm lamp for my sister, and they bought her a bath soaps kit in return. I know she enjoys being generous around the holidays, but then she always gets her feelings hurt because they cannot afford to do the same for her. People with kids are going to focus on Christmas for them first .
I love making my own cards! It's so much fun. i did once for my parents for a wedding card and after my dad read it he told me that I shuld work for Hallmark.
Oh and something cool! they now make paper and bookmarks and other things out of elephant poop.
Nobody tells me how many shoes I should own. It's a divine right.
Nobody should care how many shoes someone else owns . Maybe they are just jealous .
I don't care, , lol. It isn't their $$, so they have nothing to say!
If your feet have odifferous issues then more could be crippling.
Elephant poop?! Ewww!
And does this dress make me look fat? Yeah, I would've knocked ya out too
There's too much heat going on the forum! Let's take our mind on to something else?
I wish I can goof off in Wal-mart, since I have to be here nearly 70 hours a week. Too bad I sort of work right in it. So I better not even try!
LMAO!!!! You've just given me a few ideas :-) True or not - it's still hysterical!!!
LOL - these are hilarious! I can see my son doing some of these things
They are hilarious although I can assure anyone wondering- it's not true.
p.s., I've actually done the first prank at Wal-Mart when I was a kid. Ahh good times pranking people!
by Lgali 11 years ago
After I retired, my wife insisted that I accompany her on her trips to Wal-Mart. Unfortunately, like most men, I found shopping boring and preferred to get in and get out. Equally unfortunately, my wife is like most women - - she loved to browse. Yesterday my dear wife received the following letter...
by Debbie Carey 9 months ago
When is a hug more than a hug between a man and a woman who is NOT his wife?If a man hugs a woman in front of his wife, where is the line that it has gone too far? The "hug" is fine. Does it cross the line with a kiss on the cheek? A kiss on the neck? Prolonged hugging?...
by Ralph Deeds 8 years ago
Nancy Kaffer in the Detroit Free Press:"But I’m convinced that Sandy is a bigger problem for Romney."Making the rounds is a YouTube clip from a 2011 GOP primary debate in which Romney says that federal disaster relief maybe isn’t such a good idea."Services that can be provided by the...
by ngureco 3 years ago
Why Do Wives Get Mad With Husbands Watching Porn? How Does It Interfere With Marriage?
by thisiknow 4 years ago
What would you do if your friend flirted with your spouse?While on vacation with a few other couples, I watched in disbelief as one friend blatantly flirted with another friends husband. I could not understand why his wife said nothing. Being good friends with the wife I finally got up the nerve to...
by nightwork4 10 years ago
if a husband and wife make a porn movie is it a sin?two people who are married making a sex movie , is it still concidered to be a sin and why?
Copyright © 2021 Maven Media Brands, LLC and respective content providers on this website. HubPages® is a registered trademark of Maven Coalition, Inc. Other product and company names shown may be trademarks of their respective owners. Maven Media Brands, LLC and respective content providers to this website may receive compensation for some links to products and services on this website.
|HubPages Device ID||This is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.|
|Login||This is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.|
|HubPages Traffic Pixel||This is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.|
|Remarketing Pixels||We may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.|
|Conversion Tracking Pixels||We may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.|