Last one to post is the Winner!

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   drummer boyposted 17 years ago

   very good bob, I know it was silly

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   drummer boyposted 17 years ago

   what did one burp say to the other?

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   Bob Ewingposted 17 years ago

   silly, especially in this context is fun.

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   drummer boyposted 17 years ago

   lets be stinkers and go out the other end lol. 

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   stephhicks68posted 17 years ago

   What kind of milk comes from a forgetful cow?

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   stephhicks68posted 17 years ago

   Milk of Amnesia!

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   stephhicks68posted 17 years ago

   What are the black and white spots on a cow called?
   
   
   Hol-stains

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   SirDentposted 17 years ago

   ahem!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   gotcha!!!!!!!

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   stephhicks68posted 17 years ago

   Sir Dent - you need to enter with a cow joke

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10. 0

    SirDentposted 17 years ago

    If a blond and a brunette jump off a building at the exact same time which would hit the ground first?

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       drummer boyposted 17 years agoin reply to this

       the brunette, because the blond would have to stop and ask for directions

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       SirDentposted 17 years agoin reply to this

       The brunette would hit first. The blond would have to stop and ask for directions.

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    drummer boyposted 17 years ago

    my joke was so bad it dropped my rating lol, I don't think I will be telling anymore cow jokes.

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12. 64

    amy janeposted 17 years ago

    uh-oh! I am just in time for a good blonde joke, I think...

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13. 66

    Bob Ewingposted 17 years ago

    some jokes are less funny than others.

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    drummer boyposted 17 years ago

    how do you confuse a blond?

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    drummer boyposted 17 years ago

    give her a bag of M & M's and ask her to alphabetize them.

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       drummer boyposted 17 years agoin reply to this

       I totally love blond's by the way,  My bride to be is a blond.

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    stephhicks68posted 17 years ago

    LOL!!  Too funny!
    
    Why did the dumb blond drive around the block 47 times?
    
    
    Because her blinker was stuck

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17. 64

    amy janeposted 17 years ago

    Ahh, I have heard them all....
    I liked the cow jokes. 

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    stephhicks68posted 17 years ago

    For you Amy:
    
    A lady from the city and her traveling companion were riding the train through Vermont when she noticed some cows.
    
    "What a cute bunch of cows!" she remarked.
    "Not a bunch, herd", her friend replied.
    "Heard of what?"
    "Herd of cows."
    "Of course I've heard of cows."
    "No, a cow herd."
    "What do I care what a cow heard. I have no secrets to keep from a cow!"

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    drummer boyposted 17 years ago

    there were these 3 blond's that were very excited to be going to Disney Land.  They had been driving for 2 Days to get there. 
    
    They managed to make it through several obstacles and after the end of the second day they came upon a sign and became very sad 
    
    scoll down to read the sign
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    Disneyland Left
    
    They turned around and went home.

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    stephhicks68posted 17 years ago

    I'm sticking with cows for now...
    
    What's a cow's favorite moosical note?
    
    Beef-flat

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    drummer boyposted 17 years ago

    Well I am off to go check out the new Chinese Restaurant that has came into town.  Have a great weekend everyone.

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22. 64

    amy janeposted 17 years ago

    LOL Steph!  That was cute! 
    Yours to Drummerboy - I think that it a new one for me.

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    drummer boyposted 17 years ago

    Thx Amy
    Night all

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    amy janeposted 17 years ago

    oops...misspellings due to baby on my lap...and blondness?
    
    Have fun drummerboy!

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    Bob Ewingposted 17 years ago

    enjoy DB

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    Shirley Andersonposted 17 years ago

    Howdy everybody!!!
    
    Just a quick hello from London (Ontario).
    
    Talk to you when I get back home.
    
    Have a great holiday weekend, all the Canadian hubbers!

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    stephhicks68posted 17 years ago

    Have a great dinner, Shane.  See you Shirley!
    
    I'm logging off for now to head home and grill up my chicken.

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    Bob Ewingposted 17 years ago

    and a Happy Vitcoria day weekend to you.

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       stephhicks68posted 17 years agoin reply to this

       And to you!  My father-in-law and husband are both Canadian!  Hubby has dual citizenship. 

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    WeddingConsultantposted 17 years ago

    Those jokes are out....out like Britney Spears in a spelling bee.

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    SirDentposted 17 years ago

    yawn

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31. 0

    RUTHIE17posted 17 years ago

    Today's mighty oak is just yesterday's nut that held its ground.
    
    I win!!

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       SirDentposted 17 years agoin reply to this

       Chainsaws cut oaks down every day.

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    RUTHIE17posted 17 years ago

    One more joke--
    
    Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other man pulls out his cell phone and calls emergency services.
    
    He gasps to the operator: "My friend is dead! What can I do?" The operator in a calm, soothing voice replies: "Take it easy. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then a shot is heard.
    
    Back on the phone, the hunter says, "OK, now what?"

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    1. 88

       stephhicks68posted 17 years agoin reply to this

       LOL!!!!!

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    RUTHIE17posted 17 years ago

    OK, just one more joke--
    
    A man and a friend are playing golf one day. One of the guys is about to chip onto the green when he sees a long funeral procession on the road next to the course. He stops in mid-swing, takes off his golf cap, closes his eyes, and bows down in prayer. His friend says: "Wow! That is the most thoughtful and touching thing I have ever seen. You are truly a kind man."
    
    The other man replies, "Yeah, well, we were married 35 years."

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       SirDentposted 17 years agoin reply to this

       Nice one.

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    RUTHIE17posted 17 years ago

    one more--
    
    A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: "That's the ugliest baby that I've ever seen." The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her, "That driver just insulted me!" The man says, "You go right up there and tell him off! Go ahead, I'll hold your monkey for you."

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       SirDentposted 17 years agoin reply to this

       That was my wife and son you're talking about there.

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    Shirley Andersonposted 17 years ago

    Sir Dent - you're telling jokes instead of bedtime stories tonight?  I'll have to back and read.

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36. 0

    RUTHIE17posted 17 years ago

    Sorry--should have seen the family resemblance---
    
    Last joke I promise--
    
    Two fish swim into a concrete wall. The one turns to the other and says, "Dam!"
    
    Goodnight Ladies and Germs,  come back again,  I'm here all week!!

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    RUTHIE17posted 17 years ago

    No, No, don't beg--I'll do a few more and then I really must go---
    
    Darth Vader says "Luke Skywalker - I know what you're getting for Christmas. I felt your presents".
    
    I went to the Cashew factory last night. It was nuts!
    
    There was a farmer who noticed a fly buzzing around the cow's ear while he was milking it. Next thing you know, the fly was in the bucket of milk. The farmer says, "In one ear, and out the udder!"
    
    And I'll close with this one---
    
    The friars were behind on their belfry payments, so they opened up a small florist shop to raise funds. Since everyone liked to buy flowers from the men of God, a rival florist across town thought the competition was unfair. He asked the good fathers to close down, but they would not. He went back and begged the friars to close. They ignored him. So the rival florist hired Hugh MacTaggart, the roughest and most vicious thug in town to "persuade" them to close. Hugh beat up the friars and trashed their store, saying he'd be back if they didn't close up shop. Terrified, they did so, thereby proving that Hugh, and only Hugh, can prevent florist friars.
    
    GOODNIGHT EVERYONE!!!

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    1. 0

       SirDentposted 17 years agoin reply to this

       yawn

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    Stacie Naczelnikposted 17 years ago

    Ah...the jokes.  Lovely.

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39. 0

    SirDentposted 17 years ago

    Good night, Ladies and Shirley.
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    Just kidding, Shirley. 

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    Shirley Andersonposted 17 years ago

    

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       Zsuzsy Beeposted 17 years agoin reply to this

       darn you said you were leaving

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    stephhicks68posted 17 years ago

    Alright everyone... a lawyer joke from the lawyer:
    
    Bob calls the law office and says: "I want to talk to my lawyer."
    
    The receptionist replies, "I’m sorry Bob, but he died last week."
    
    The next day Bob calls again and asks the same question. The receptionist replies, "Bob, I told you yesterday, he died last week."
    
    The next day Bob calls for the third time and asks to speak to his lawyer. By this time the receptionist is getting a little annoyed and says, "Bob! I keep telling you, your lawyer died last week. Why do you keep calling?!!"
    
    Bob replies, "Because I just love hearing it!"

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    stephhicks68posted 17 years ago

    One more for good measure (there were so many blonde jokes - fair game?)
    
    One day, there was this lawyer who had just bought a new car, and he was eager to show it off to his colleagues, when all of a sudden an eighteen wheeler came out of nowhere and took of the driver's side door with him standing right there.
    
    "NOOO!" he screamed, because he knew that no matter how good a mechanic tried to fix it, it never would be the same.
    
    Finally, a cop came by, and the lawyer ran up to him yelling, "MY JAGUAR DOOR WAS JUST RUINED BY SOME FOOLISH DRIVER!!!" he exclaimed.
    
    "You're a lawyer aren't you?" asked the policeman. "Yes, I am, but what does this have to do with my car?!?!" the lawyer asked.
    
    "HA! You lawyers are always so materialistic. All you care about is your possessions. I bet you didn't even notice that your left arm is missing did you?" the cop said.
    
    The lawyer looked down at his side and cried, "MY ROLEX!"

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    Stacie Naczelnikposted 17 years ago

    With all the sadness and trauma going on in the world at the moment, it is worth reflecting on the death of a very important person, which almost went unnoticed last week.
    
    Larry LaPrise, the man who wrote "The Hokey Pokey" died peacefully at the age of 93.
    
    The most traumatic part for his family was getting him into the coffin.
    
    They put his left leg in, and then the trouble started.

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       Zsuzsy Beeposted 17 years agoin reply to this

       Condolensces to the family but that really is just too funny.

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    stephhicks68posted 17 years ago

    LOL - I've heard that one... good for another laugh.  (but just one)

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    WeddingConsultantposted 17 years ago

    It's 3:30 AM here...why am I still awake? argh!

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       Shirley Andersonposted 17 years agoin reply to this

       Because you have a newborn that needs to eat every few hours?

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          WeddingConsultantposted 17 years agoin reply to this

          Yes this is true.  Too true

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             rmrposted 17 years agoin reply to this

             AH, I remember baby induced insomnia. Now we're just 4 years away from empty nest syndrome! Time flies, when you're raising kids!

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46. 66

    Bob Ewingposted 17 years ago

    good morning

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47. 59

    Andrew0208posted 17 years ago

    good morning to every great hubber in the community.

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48. 59

    Andrew0208posted 17 years ago

    good morning to every great hubber in the community.

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    Bob Ewingposted 17 years ago

    and a good morning to you

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    Andrew0208posted 17 years ago

    Happy Saturday sir.

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