How to start a good marriage.

1. 57

   Lgaliposted 14 years ago

   How to start a good marriage.

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      anjalichughposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      Move forward, accepting that he is different from you and will stay that way. Things become easier if you accept that you two are biologically, psychologically and emotionally very different from each other. Once you know this.. you try to focus your energy on other constructive things which are important for a healthy relationship.

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      1. 57

         Lgaliposted 14 years agoin reply to this

         very nice views some time very hard to think that two are biologically, psychologically and emotionally very different from each other.

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   2. 65

      Lady_Eposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      I would say get all the skeletons out of the closet so there are no nasty surprises when you are married.

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      Paper Moonposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      with a wedding

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2. 59

   Rotemposted 14 years ago

   Be yourself, be the woman/man he married to, be his/her best friend ever, dont argue on money issues.

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   1. 57

      Lgaliposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      how to avoid money issues

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      1. 59

         Rotemposted 14 years agoin reply to this

         good question.lol

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         1. 57

            Lgaliposted 14 years agoin reply to this

            i find this is major hurdle for good start

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         dennisemattposted 14 years agoin reply to this

         decide your partner is worth more then money. stick to it.

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   2. 61

      Davinagirl3posted 14 years agoin reply to this

      Great advice.  Have a partner with whom you can speak of anything.  Communication is key.  It has been said before, and is always true.

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3. 60

   GeneriqueMediaposted 14 years ago

   Umm...don't you turn the key? Or light a match? Or something like that?

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      Lgaliposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      that is nice ideas light a match

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   2. 78

      frogdroppingposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      lol funny - and wrong. You just don't start a row. Ever.
       
       

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         Lgaliposted 14 years agoin reply to this

         i think match is good for long marriage lol

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         1. 78

            frogdroppingposted 14 years agoin reply to this

            Yes Lgali - but it's the right match that counts.
            
            No good pairing polar bears with snakes now, is it?

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            1. 61

               mydreamsRtrueposted 14 years agoin reply to this

               Try something new !
               You'll never will change man. We ladies sometime will change there ways of thinking, but you'll never change ,maybe you could work with him and find out how it will work NEVER discus of Money! You'll never win! YOU'LL NEVER CHANGE A MAN YOU CONTROL HIM BUT NEVER CHANGE HIS WAY OF BEING!

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               1. 57

                  Lgaliposted 14 years agoin reply to this

                  very differnt take

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4. 55

   FunFacterposted 14 years ago

   Question that has been asked many times but yet to find a good answer. I think its all about good chemistry.

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      frogdroppingposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      Yeppers - because we all know what bad chemistry causes don't we?

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   2. 57

      Lgaliposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      yes, good chemistry

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5. 75

   livewithrichardposted 14 years ago

   Communication is the key.  Finding out what he/she likes, wants or needs isn't enough, you need to find out what you like, want and need and be able to express it clearly.
   
   Love is not the answer to a successful marriage, you have to like the person because there will be plenty of days where you feel like you just can't be around anyone. 
   
   Your partner should be your best friend.

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   1. 57

      Lgaliposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      so love + Communication imp..

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      maidouxixiposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      I agree with you ~~ "Your partner should be your best friend!"is the best description of the marriage.everyone should put all of your soul and heart each other  .

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6. 75

   livewithrichardposted 14 years ago

   Unless you are filthy rich, you will never avoid money problems in a marriage.  The bills never go away the income rises slower than your wants and needs.  The key as I stated earlier is communication. 
   
   If you are honest and communicate clearly with your partner then the money issues will be handled as a team effort and not as if you were on your own.
   
   Being supportive and also assertive will help you communicate more affectively.

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   1. 57

      Lgaliposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      so communication is best key for good marriage

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7. 75

   Lady Guinevereposted 14 years ago

   Expect changes in both of you.  The first five years are the crucial years.  Many changes will occur in every aspect of each other's lives to be made into the one.  Communication is the key--you have to be able to talk about the good things and those which you think are bad or too personal.  Never think the other person is groveling too much for think of it as if you were in their shoes.  Remember with some things--the more you talk about it and get it out into the open the better for both of you to heal it.  Be compassionate with each other.

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      Lgaliposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      another good point open Communication

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8. 81

   LondonGirlposted 14 years ago

   My flatmate had a T-shirt she wore to the gym, which said, "men are like floor tiles - lay 'em right the first time and you can walk all over them forever."

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   1. 57

      Lgaliposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      that nice way to have good start

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   2. 75

      Lady Guinevereposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      LOL

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   3. 57

      Lgaliposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      nicely said

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9. 60

   GeneriqueMediaposted 14 years ago

   Haha, great shirt. ;D
   
   The first step to a good marriage is to get off of the computer and into a dive bar.
   
   Well, okay, maybe not a successful marriage, but you'll still have the cake and memories.

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   1. 57

      Lgaliposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      dive bar.LOL

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10. 57

    Lgaliposted 14 years ago

    very nice ideas for starting a new life

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       GeneriqueMediaposted 14 years agoin reply to this

       Have you tried marrying a mob boss and having to enter into a witness protection program?

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       1. 57

          Lgaliposted 14 years agoin reply to this

          why to marry mob boss?

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11. 75

    Research Analystposted 14 years ago

    Be realistic and be mature enough to know that it is not a honeymoon it is hard work.

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    1. 57

       Lgaliposted 14 years agoin reply to this

       so to start a good marriage a hard work after a brief honeymoon

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12. 59

    artificialhazeposted 14 years ago

    Be who you are! Don't pretend that your perfect, none of us are.  If you lay everything out on the table, their will be no lies, no expectations that will be unfulfilled, your partner should know you at your worst.  Let them take care of you when you have the flu.  When you see how they behave around you while your sick, you will know whether or not you should even bother wasting your time!!

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    1. 57

       Lgaliposted 14 years agoin reply to this

       that is nice
       If you lay everything out on the table, their will be no lies, no expectations that will be unfulfilled, your partner should know you at your worst

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    2. 57

       Lgaliposted 14 years agoin reply to this

       I like your take..

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13. 82

    Princessaposted 14 years ago

    Someone sent me this today:
    
    
    An African proverb states, "Before you get married, keep both eyes open, and after you marry, close one eye."
    
    
    Before you get involved and make a commitment to someone, don't let lust, desperation, immaturity, ignorance, pressure from others or a low self-esteem make you blind to warning signs. Keep your eyes open, and don't fool yourself that you can change someone or that what you see as faults are not really important.

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    1. 57

       Lgaliposted 14 years agoin reply to this

       very nicely said

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          blogdigzposted 14 years agoin reply to this

          It's really

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14. 71

    acouasmposted 14 years ago

    Not nit-picking about the small stuff.

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    1. 57

       Lgaliposted 14 years agoin reply to this

       that is goo take

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15. 55

    HappyHerposted 14 years ago

    Treat your partner as they are the most welcome and important guest in your life, always.  They are the ones that should get your best manners, be gracious with them and celebrate them being in your life every day and you'll have the best marriage of all.

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    1. 57

       Lgaliposted 14 years agoin reply to this

       very nice ideas

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          HappyHerposted 14 years agoin reply to this

          very nice ideas
          
          Thank you.  They can be hard to remember as life seems to get in the way, and there is a particular sense of security when you feel you can take it for granted that your partner will be there.  But if you can practice the art of giving your partner your best regardless of what else is going on, you will find yourself way ahead of the game of a successful relationship.

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          1. 57

             Lgaliposted 14 years agoin reply to this

             more adjustment with everyday after marriage

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    2. 78

       TamCorposted 14 years agoin reply to this

       I agree with you 100%!  My husband and I have done this for all of our almost 21 years together, and it works...

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       1. 57

          Lgaliposted 14 years agoin reply to this

          wow this is good advice for new couples

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16. 0

    Adam Bposted 14 years ago

    I would say to start a good marriage and have a lasting solid marriage, don't try and change your partner.  You love him/her for who they are at the beginning, remember that he/she is that same person you fell in love with years ago.
    
    If you marry a musician, remember that he/she will ALWAYS be a musician.  Don't try and take that away from them and say things such as "I thought you would grow up and be more responsible" or "I thought you would gro out of it." 
    
    Yeah...somewhat personal...I'll stop now.

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    1. 57

       Lgaliposted 14 years agoin reply to this

       very nice points

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17. 73

    CennyWennyposted 14 years ago

    Accept the fact that there will be times when you don't like each other, but believe in your marriage depsite it. I think you have to believe in marriage as an institution to really go long term. Have a good friendship, be willing to compromise, and be open.

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    1. 57

       Lgaliposted 14 years agoin reply to this

       sorry to self advertise but check mu hub about marriage there are some changes happening in our lives.
       http://hubpages.com/hub/Is-Marriage-Ins … -in-Danger

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18. 65

    Lady_Eposted 14 years ago

    Don't hide any secrets.  Get it all out in the open before you walk down the aisle.

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       Lgaliposted 14 years agoin reply to this

       what kind of secrets?

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       dennisemattposted 14 years agoin reply to this

       yeah, its a real knife in the heart to find out a lie after 8 or 9 years of thinking you knew everything.
       lies on purpose, to make you think the other person is something they are not because they are afraid if you knew youd leave....just tell it up front..

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19. 70

    Sunny Robinsonposted 14 years ago

    I think to start a good marriage, you have to keep a mindset of maintaining a good marriage.  It's a long-term and ever-evolving goal, so have the basic priorities in place to maintain it when you begin.  I've never been married, so I wouldn't quite know.  To me it seems like a relationship, but with legal papers.
    
    So with that in mind, I think about what it takes to start and maintain a good relationship.  Don't act like somebody else from the start, where then after you get past a few bases, you do a complete 180 and scare the crap out of your potential mate. 
    
    Stay honest, be yourself, and make sure all your quirks are known when things become serious.  Be aware of all your mate's quirks.  Marriage should be when you know you can accept and love all the bad and the good.
    
    Oh, I'd suggest living with the potential spouse for a few years before marriage to see if I could handle all his living habits.  A good start to a marriage can be spontaneous (some marriages have been spontaneous at the start and survived many years - very rare), but I would hope afterwards there was some realization to wanting to maintain a powerful relationship with the love of your life - for the rest of your life.
    
    Edited to add: Oh, and a few words for a good start to a marriage.
    1) Openness and transparency.
    2) Boundaries.
    3) Being on the same page on what marriage and love means.
    4) Positive communication and negotiations.
    5) Trust.

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    1. 57

       Lgaliposted 14 years agoin reply to this

       not married and still very very good takes. Congratulation

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20. 75

    AEvansposted 14 years ago

    Begin as friends, before you become lovers.

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21. 58

    lxxyposted 14 years ago

    I can say it probably doesn't begin over a black out in Vegas.

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22. 0

    dennisemattposted 14 years ago

    STARTING a good marriage isnt as hard as maintaning a good marriage. I would say, to start off good, make sure your not jumping into it with unrealistic expectations, like..he/she will change...and also make sure youve known each other long enough that all that beginning nice stuff is over. like, you KNOW he farts...youve seen each other at your worst times and still are madly in love.

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23. 0

    ralwusposted 14 years ago

    Um, I forgot the question.

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    1. 57

       Lgaliposted 14 years agoin reply to this

       How to start a good marriage. LOL

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24. 61

    kmackey32posted 14 years ago

    Lots and Lots of sex. LOL

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       nazishnasimposted 14 years agoin reply to this

       That turns hair grey ... and then even viagra can't help!

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    2. 59

       Paper Moonposted 14 years agoin reply to this

       with lots of this before and after

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          nazishnasimposted 14 years agoin reply to this

          But then your hair turn grey ... and all the rear things involved! That's isn't a myth? .. is it?

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             Paper Moonposted 14 years agoin reply to this

             Better to have grey hair than hairy palms.

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                nazishnasimposted 14 years agoin reply to this

                !?!

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    3. 57

       Lgaliposted 14 years agoin reply to this

       very very nice one

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    4. 57

       Lgaliposted 14 years agoin reply to this

       very nice way to start

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25. 61

    kmackey32posted 14 years ago

    LOL yep thats right.

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26. 59

    Paper Moonposted 14 years ago

    

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       nazishnasimposted 14 years agoin reply to this

       Now that explains all the hair on my body!

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27. 0

    nazishnasimposted 14 years ago

    I know how to end a good one.

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    1. 57

       Lgaliposted 14 years agoin reply to this

       what is the secret

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28. 0

    \Brenda Scullyposted 14 years ago

    is someone thinking of getting married

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    1. 57

       Lgaliposted 14 years agoin reply to this

       yes

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29. 78

    soni2006posted 14 years ago

    visit my hub on this.

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30. 60

    anime_nanetposted 14 years ago

    Marry a good wife

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       Lgaliposted 14 years agoin reply to this

       how to know if she will be good?

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          soni2006posted 14 years agoin reply to this

          Check her out from up to down, in and out and you will get to know the status.

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             Lgaliposted 14 years agoin reply to this

             very nice

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31. 40

    Garrett McLeeposted 14 years ago

    Nothing I read in here seems wrong.  It's a compilation of all of the things everyone here has said.

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    1. 57

       Lgaliposted 14 years agoin reply to this

       nice way to say everything

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32. 61

    Bo Bixbieposted 14 years ago

    Marry a mute.

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    1. 57

       Lgaliposted 14 years agoin reply to this

       very funny advice or marry a sllent movie

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       Lgaliposted 14 years agoin reply to this

       where I can find

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33. 60

    Mac Missionposted 14 years ago

    pure heart with smile and patience makes good marriage. many of them say understanding , chemistry nothing works be patience, keep smile on your face think think think open heartedly accept be happy thats it..........!!!!!!!

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       Lgaliposted 14 years agoin reply to this

       very nice
       pure heart with smile and patience all time

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34. 57

    Lgaliposted 14 years ago

    where i can find mute LOL

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35. 59

    jenny88posted 14 years ago

    not sure how to start one
    
    I thought I had it right!!!
    
    I think things change so much as you grow older.
    
    either closer or further apart.
    
    starting it is relatively easy!!!
    jenz

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    1. 57

       Lgaliposted 14 years agoin reply to this

       very nice

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36. 57

    Lgaliposted 14 years ago

    where I can find mute spouse

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37. 64

    Greek Oneposted 14 years ago

    go into it with really low expectations and with no illusions that it will solve all your problems and make your life heaven on earth
    
    .... you'll be suprised at how good it can end up being!

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    1. 57

       Lgaliposted 14 years agoin reply to this

       very nice take
       low expectations and with no illusions

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38. 71

    Beth100posted 14 years ago

    Honesty, trust and clear/open communication.  These are the basis of all relationships.

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    1. 57

       Lgaliposted 14 years agoin reply to this

       good take

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39. 62

    Bredaviesposted 14 years ago

    Remember men might do somethings to annoy you. Read mt article http://hubpages.com/hub/The-Truth-about … Truth?done

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       Lgaliposted 14 years agoin reply to this

       good one

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          HubChiefposted 14 years agoin reply to this

          Well does not matter how you start, idea is to maintain long consistently whatever you start with.
          
          Read article on making your relationship sweeter than sweet and also share with your spouse.
          http://hubpages.com/hub/How-to-make-you … than-sweet
          
          
          The ideas in this article can be implemented from day 1 with life long commitment on coming back to those again and again.
          
          
          
          

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          1. 57

             Lgaliposted 14 years agoin reply to this

             nice take

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40. 61

    Davinagirl3posted 14 years ago

    The best way to start a good marriage is to make sure you know all you can about your spouse.  I understand he/she will reveal only what he/she wishes to reveal, but the more you know the better the relationship will be.  Don't be afraid to let your prospective spouse all of the important details about you... including your credit score.  That way it won't come up and bite you in the butt later.

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    1. 57

       Lgaliposted 14 years agoin reply to this

       good take

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    2. 61

       beautyroseposted 14 years agoin reply to this

       Hi divinagirl. Hope your in good health

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41. 0

    mtsi1098posted 14 years ago

    mutual trust, mutual respect, much communication and never forget about the little things.

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    1. 57

       Lgaliposted 14 years agoin reply to this

       mutual trust is good one

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       1. 57

          Lgaliposted 14 years agoin reply to this

          very nice

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       2. 57

          Lgaliposted 14 years agoin reply to this

          good one

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42. 0

    Ghost32posted 14 years ago

    Pam and I started our good marriage by writing a letter to her SSI (disability) caseworker, telling the Feds to take their money and shove it.  To say they were shocked would be a gross understatement.
    
    Sh'ed been on disability for many years, but they'd decided to drastically cut her check down just because she was living in a house that was too expensive--and never mind that she only rented 20 percent of the place.  In other words, they were essentially accusing her of fraud, and that ticked both of us off royally.
    
    Summary:  If you want to cement your new, good marriage with an unshakeable bond, start out by making it "you and me against the world"--nothing like having an enemy in common to fuse you together as one! LOL

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    1. 57

       Lgaliposted 14 years agoin reply to this

       very nice take

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    2. 57

       Lgaliposted 14 years agoin reply to this

       good take

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43. 63

    indian cookingposted 14 years ago

    By taking the wedding vows seriously.

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    1. 57

       Lgaliposted 14 years agoin reply to this

       good one

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44. 61

    Dale Mazurekposted 14 years ago

    You need to understand that the honeymoon stage goes away

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       Lgaliposted 14 years agoin reply to this

       you are right that goes in blink

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       beautyroseposted 14 years agoin reply to this

       How long does it last?
       
       
       I think if  people would look at each othe's religion or if the other half has no religion would you mind or not? cause how you/I  start a good marriage when religion matters.
       
       Also does age matter for a good marriage? how about if I married a guy older than me would be ok. But how about if his 10 years younger than me? I think this has something to do with having a good marriage.  Religion and age.

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    Daniel Carterposted 14 years ago

    Maawidge (Remember "Princess Bride"?)
    
    Doesn't it take both people being mature and emotionally healthy to work?

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       Lgaliposted 14 years agoin reply to this

       good one

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    Valerie Fposted 14 years ago

    Making sure that husband and wife are mature and fully dedicated to the marriage is a good start.
    
    However, in our culture, starting marriage really isn't a problem. It's continuing the marriage where difficulties arise, and maturity and dedication become more important as over the years couples find out what "for better or for worse, in sickness and in health" really mean.
    
    Marriages don't work on their own. They require work. A lot of work.

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       Lgaliposted 14 years agoin reply to this

       this is good one They require work. A lot of work

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