How do men and women engage on HubPages forums?
I interact more with women than the men. More often than not, the men cannot see past themselves, even more so than women.
Most men are all about ego than anything else.
Most women are all about emotion than anything else.
However, I respond more to women, simply because they are more refined.
I'm rather curious as to how you would arrive at such a conclusion myself.
I don't really think about flirting on HP forums. I'd rather do it in person.
As far as responses, hmm, I really don't even think about it in that light. I know I had a forum thread about tennis because I love tennis, and one guy responded. I was kind of surprised that there weren't more tennis fans responding, but it's a holiday weekend, so there are better things to do than spend time on a forum.
I guess it really depends on why people spend time in the forums.with a roll of eyes
In all sincerity, I can say that I've never encountered that problem on the forums here. Most of the men are quite willing to interact with me if I ask questions or seek input from them, without my having to flirt.
People in general tend to react to us like we approach them, so I've found that most of the men are solicitous and respectful when I come into the forums.Thank you, wheelin. I try to be as open and honest as possible. I enjoy discussion and conversation and believe that it should be kept as friendly as possible at all times.
Untrue. I flirt with as many ladies who will allow me to do so.
The question one might ask me is "why"?
And my answer would be- to make them smile. That's all that matters.But does your good intention to make them smile derail the point? And thereby put the focus on you and not on what the point was or might have been?
You said, "Most men are all about ego than anything else."I would hope not.
I haven't experience it and pleas trust me, I've been at this a long time.
Yes, I said that, but I can see past mine and don't need my ego stroked by anyone. It makes me feel good to know that I put a smile on their face. That's all.
There are times when there is not a response, but not to often.
And see Sally's Trove, your post brought out one of HP's most beautiful women...AEvans.
@AEvan- always a pleasure to see you.Welcome back and yes this did bring me into the forum,lololo! Always a joy to see you too!
I would rather the woman enjoy the conversation on some level, even if they disagree with my point on the topic.
Example: *sigh* a quote by you.
Apparently, you were laughing about my initial post, which means you were smiling and now we're addressing your post? are we not?I would prefer a man to enjoy the conversation and many who disagree with me, have told me they enjoy the conversation. Just not too many.
With men though, it's about "intellectual" honesty, which what I try to convey, regardless of whether or not, we agree or disagree.
I always bring honesty to the table.I sure there is, but my experience has shown that women lead with emotion more than they do with rationale.
Both.
All three. Some are pure emotion, some are seldom rational when they put aside their emotions and think. And, my collection of Playboy(20 years worth) would say that I like to look at pretty women. But, as far as fantasizing about them? From time to time, all men do and there is no harm in that.
Untrue.
Hello AEvans, nice to see you here... or anywhere for that matter.
Just a thought. I wonder what the ratio of men to women hubbers?
I know I have more female followers than male.Maybe admin could inform us? Interesting that you have more male followers. I wonder if it varies with the subjects we write about?
I guess it was a bit naive of me to suggest it. I am me here and everywhere else, and made the silly assumption that others are as well.
Hang on.... when we signed up didn't we have to give our real details?
Hubpages should have the sign up names at least, and the sex of the hubber.I've heard that happens sometimes, usually with very young children - just forgetting whether you are boy or girl, man or woman, male, female, or other - and I, myself, have been confused sometimes when it was late and a loud noise woke me from a deep dream of being a gay man, then I was somewhat relieved to find I was not a gay man, but was female, such as it is. So don't feel bad!
Hey you raise a good point.
If I come back ,Im coming back as a man ,because men tend to earn more money my adsense would then be jump from 10c to $1..
I have more female than male followers, but with a handle like WeddingPlanner, what would you expect?
Just the words would make most men run in terror!That should have been obvious to me. DIYWEDDINGPLANNER is pretty specific!
I have a lot of car and mechanical hubs, Maybe I should have called my profile Pistonbroke.Well, there is that!
I could have used a good car guy yesterday when the nice people at Firestone tried to sell me an entire set of tires instead of just the one that was losing air.
If we want to talk about how women are treated anyplace, let's talk about how they are treated in auto shops!
Well I am a simple man and only go by the avatar.
Anyone without a photo of themselves are assumed to be non human.
I was gonna use an avatar from a famous movie star, but what the hell would he know about adjusting the crown wheel and pinion clearance on a differential?
Anyway, posting my rough head on here is no big deal.
Some poor individuals have to see me in the flesh, so you guys get off easyI try not to have intellectual anythings, definitely not conversations. I keep it lighter than light - pretty much as airy as it gets. That's because the few times I tryed to respond with a bit of intellectual wit I've gotten all the facts wrong and was called on it!! So I learned my lesson.
And if you don't get any flirting from the (supposededly) guys it may have to do with your feminine kind of craft-oriented avatar with a "girls in the attic" kind of air to it - that and cats turn guys off, I've heard. They could care less about our gorgeous hand-crocheted bedspread and the vintage dress we have framed on our wall. They seem to get all turned on, however, when certain hubbers talk about doing it on an airplane or some such nonsense. Between the religiosity, the political creepiness, and the incredible lightness of being some of us subscribe to, HP forums are not a source for any substance. I'm terribly sorry if that disappoints you, it actually makes me happy! but I'm easy!!
Now girls, be nice!
They are just envious of us men, Earnest! Do you blame them?
I just don't understand women these days. It's gotten to where they think they're just as good as the men!
snarkysnakeBetter!
I can only quote the late, great, James Brown, when he so aptly screamed "hock"!
- Let me guess Randy... the wife is outta town?
Even tiger snakes ain't that brave!Naw! She's asleep!
Great! You still have time to delete the post!
She can't read anyway, Earnest. She was educated in South Carolina!
I'm going to let that go, reminding myself that the snake was the root of all evil and the downfall of women in general. Hey, because of you, women (and men!) wear clothes. See how badly you screwed up!
Your all banned!
Sorry wrong thread.- Stevennix2001posted 12 years ago
0Thanks Sally, and you bring up some valid points here as well about this.
I think you might be onto something there with your last statement. As I think most people tend to get so passionate about those particular subjects, it's almost as if they feel it defines them individually, so they feel the need to defend their point of views no matter what. Leaving very little room for the topic to go astray.
Plus, I seem to recall several atheists stating once in a religious forum, they felt it was their moral obligation to spread their views as much as possible to people. This tends to make me think that maybe the reason why politics and religious forums don't often get away from the topic is because people feel it's somehow their moral obligation to spread their views onto others; feeling the other side could corrupt our society if left unchallenged. Of course, I could be wrong on that, but I'm merely stating an opinion based on what I've seen in forums in the past here.
What is the forum for?
It's an individual perspective and left up to that specific individual and how they want to use it.I agree wholeheartedly, Cags. Each individual comes to not just the forums, but to HubPages as well for their own reasons. If determinations are to be made about whether those reasons are acceptable or not, I believe they should be made by the staff. Sure, occasionally threads get derailed, but how often does that lead to other, and, in some cases more fruitful conversations than the OP may have intended?
Actually, there are rules that apply. Those rules are based on character, which shows behavior and understanding of one's own life.
The problem with "respect" is it is subjective to the individual and has many other factors involved. Some people expect a level of respect to be granted and some people expect an extremely high level of respect must be granted at all times, and not at just specific times.
However, HP does have rules for the forum, which apparently obvious, only a handful of people actually read.Sure there is....post to another thread and not come back to the one they were posting in to begin with.
I said that, silly!
I also said that most people don't want to do that. Basically, because we're too lazy.
yeh, phooey on them!
believe it or not, I am having a lot of fun today! with exclamation points and baiting Cagsil to the point of ridiculousness. Do you know, that if I just respond each time certain people say something, they really get their panties in a twist and I know its evil, but some days, that's all the fun I have! well, that and watermelon!
How dare you!
Banned - for life, I say!HAHAHA! Me too!
Not really. No humor or sarcasm on my part.
It isn't difficult to understand when "agree to disagree" has been reached. It can be recognized. Actually isn't a shift of anything. We both voiced ourselves and there isn't a need to continue along those same lines. oh, Cagsil and I have agreed to disagree on most everything, but especially on his view of women, which, in my opinion is so convoluted it isn't even funny. I often get irritated that he makes definitive statements without indicating that it is his opinion, only. In other words, "women do this" "women do that" which is first of all a generalization and an unbelievably demeaning one, but also it comes from the same guy who made a hub called "Women of HubPages" out of his proclaimed love of women here especially and how smart and beautiful they are! Then he says we're emotional and irrational - so wow, I just want him to acknowledge someday that he is conflicted about how he feels about women. Also, we get sarcastic and rude with each other because we have been responding to each other here for months and know that it doesn't really mean much.
I feel the same way about anyone who makes declarative statements as if they were fact, when they are only the speaker's opinions and not based on anything real, just their take on the subject. Its very irritating and misleading to do that! Cags often does that, in an arrogant way, as though he really believes he is a world authority on these subjects! but he's not the only arrogant one here. I guess it keeps the conversation flowing - but I could do without all the arrogance and posturing! Oh, and also, how about people who won't directly answer a question, when it is uncomfortable for them. They just talk and talk around it, never answering! They quote your question and respond as if they were answering but when you try to figure out exactly what they're saying it is impossible. Then finish up with something that is supposed to diffuse their comments like : "just a thought" or "you TRY to have a nice day" - often making it seem like you are the one who is over-emotional and angry, but when you read their words they are very emotional responses! "just a thought!" and alsoYour view.
They are, which is what you seem to be missing.
It's not a conflict, which you apparent seem to think there is. Emotion is void of rationale. What part do you not understand?
I wasn't being sarcastic. You were just pure emotion, like I said.
Actually, you've already prove yourself wrong, when you responded to my post.
Ironically you would make such a statement, especially when I don't make such a claim. Goes to show your perception of me as an individual is skewed by you yourself. But, good luck going forward.
The fact that you see what I say coming from arrogance is a perfect example of your skewed view.
Then, change your view and how you see others, then you would have a problem.
Now you resort to mocking me without actually mentioning my name. Must be nice to be you. You must really make yourself proud. And, yes I can see you attempting to turn it around and I wouldn't be surprised if you did. You will however only prove my original point.
As for my statement of telling you to have a good, was courtesy, considering it is how you ended your post to me.- Okay. sorry, i didn't realize that your intention. Well I never said you were being emotional, so don't look at me. Besides, life is too short to worry about what others think anyways.
sniff, sniff! (blowing nose and wiping tears away) I really thought you, Stevenix, of all people, would understand! Without my emotions, what would I be? Just a glob of bland paste, primarily. I treasure my emotions. They tell me when people are being pedantic, boring, overly abusive, and crude, as well as funny, informative and loving. Yet, some people (who will remain nameless) continue to assert that being emotional is a bad thing!!! What? Imagine the forums without emotions - would we even continue to come here? I think not! and now for the obligatory emoticons::
all of which were invented especially for women like me! and also !!!!!Aw don't cry mega. I didn't mean like that. Besides, emotions can be a wonderful thing, as it can give us strength whenever things aren't looking so great. Or make us appreciate the little things in life as well. Besides, I don't disagree with anything you said in forums so far, so you shouldn't cry. Plus, I wouldn't want you to change Mega, as hubpages would be boring without you around.
Hmm. This thread turned serious since the last time I saw it.
I'm one of those women who doesn't know how to flirt. If I think about it, though, I realize that when I was a teenager and working in a store with lots of teen boys who were flirting with girls who worked there, I flirted back (a little). There was something flattering and innocent in the ways these 16-year-old boys (who weren't at all sure of themselves with a girl they kind of liked) flirted; so it was kind of easy to just join in. I see it going on when I now shop at the grocery store and a certain kind of conversation goes on between the cashier and the "sacker" sometimes. It brings back memories.
Then, though, I outgrew that and got so where I wouldn't pick up on just any guy's flirting because I'd gotten old enough tor recognize it for what it was (which was pretty much along the lines of the "bower birds" thing, I'm guessing (although I've never heard of bower birds. ) Or else, it was just teens getting used to socially interacting with lots of other teens of the opposite sex (with "who finds whom appealing" being a factor - but 16-year-old boys tend to find most girls appealing).
The only other time I ever got involved with any behavior that seemed at all like flirting was when it was someone I was actually interested in, and who was interested in me, and what - again - it kind of came as part of the awkward, sending kind-of-like-you, signals thing. The rest of the time in my grown-up life, if some guy seems to be flirting my reaction runs from dismissing it to finding it kind (or very) obnoxious. So that's offline life. Lots of women (like me) aren't into being manipulative, wanting to seem to be "leading someone on", or interested in "meaningless silliness" in interactions with guys. (No offense intended to anyone who enjoys flirting. I just don't happen to get it, and it doesn't happen to be in my personality." Something that CAN happen, though, is that sometimes I'll be being my usual friendly self, and someone will interpret that as flirting (and it really isn't). I suppose in a world of so many different kinds of people, misinterpreting stuff is going to happen. )
Online, nobody seems to flirt with me. I'm guessing that's because I don't put an actress picture up, I write about serious stuff much of the time, and I make no secret that I'm old enough to have grown kids. Back to the original thread question: IF anyone were to flirt with me in respond to a serious post I'd ignore it. When other people flirt back and forth I figure it's their business and move on too. Personally, I don't get flirting online because much of the time the people involved are flirting with a fake avatar that could really be some "gross" person in real life. (Based on my own thinking about, I guess I must "know how to flirt" , but I guess I have to be interested in the person before I'd find myself behaving in a way that would called "flirting", even if I weren't aiming to be "a flirt"). I guess nobody involved minds (or else they know, behind the scenes, who the other person really is) It's all fine I guess. People like different stuff. I just happen to be someone who isn't a big fan of online flirting for myself (good thing, eh? ) I like plain, old, social interaction that leaves flirting out, whether a thread is a fun one or a serious one.
As for me, I don't post in the forums too much, In the R&B forum, that is just a MISTAKE IMO.
But in the other forums...I've asked questions about my computer having no sound, or something else, and both men and women have come to my rescue.
Unfortunately *sigh* men don't flirt with me unless it was a long time ago.
But as far as contributing to the forums...I don't think I feel like I have to flirt...................................I don't think I know how!
I've never known how to flirt...One year, many ago, a co-worker recognized this and offered to teach me.
There was an older gentleman at the company, a security guard with a solid marriage, and my friend suggested I "try him out" with her coaching, to see if I had any flirting potential. She'd prepared him for this lesson of mine, and me, too...and guess what? I was a total failure. Just something I never learned how to do.
I'm so glad y'all have cleared that up for me. Flirting is basically nasty, unless you do it right!
Now, who wants a margarita?
I love margaritas.
I'm not sure any of it's cleared up, not at least for me...but I'll take a couple of those margaritas. TY so much.
I'll be the peacock next door. Sorry! But I'm guilty as charged. I was born a flirt.
As always with your comments, Lisa, there is such richness, so many paths to walk down, so many things to think about.
Maybe there's an article idea in this for you or me...who has the time to see it through?
You and I share this awkwardness of what it means to be flirtatious, yet it isn't that we didn't have models to show us the way, if we wanted to go down that road.Thanks, Sally's Trove (although I'm not sure a lot of the people who come to forums are always looking for "so many paths" - and yet I post anyway.
)
It is a good idea for an article. If you see it as something you'd like to do in the near future, I'd like to read it. If you don't have time, it might be something I'd add to my list for "some day" stuff (which means there's a good chance I'd never get to it anyway), but even if I ever got inspired to write about the subject it would be from a very different angle Actually, here's a Part II to your article if you decide to write it: "How Not Being Flirtatious Can Actually Be Very Effective in Attracting the Right Kind of Person". Please add to your "some day" list, as I will. Maybe we can collaborate in the future. If I have the time for an article like this, I'll definitely email you. Sometimes two heads can be better than one, and I think you and I have a lot to share about this topic.
Hmm, can't say I've ever witnessed anyone get engaged on HubPages. What an interesting idea. The whole 'on bended knee thing' would have to be closely monitored by HP -you know, for the safety of the proposer.
Question is, how to do "Hubber/Hubberette" episodes, and will HP allow video casting per episode, like ABC or Hulu? Will there be a "Hub Ceremony" as elimination round? And what about Hubs of their travels to say Tahiti, Hong-Kong, Morocco? Sky Diving Dates and such? Cocktail Parties. Post season interviews and follow-ups?
He he, I am just having a laugh.
James.I think you should propose this thought stream of yours to HP. Goodness knows HP needs something to propel them into a site of interest and value. Reality TV's a big thing these days.
Laughing with you.Actually (provided this was not make-believe), I think there were a couple of people who did end up getting married after meeting on here. (Of course, who knows what the heck to believe or not believe? It could have been two alter-ego/sockpuppets marrying each other, for all I know. Goodness knows sockpuppets have been to known to have whole conversations with themself (themselves?) on here.
I don't think flirting is bad. I do feel silly to think back on some of the boys I found worthy of flirting with, though.
As for giggling, I still find that whenever a group of close women friends are together there still tends to be lots of it (although when you're a woman it's called "cackling" 
)Megan flirting outragiously?!! Noooo!! That would be unimaginable!
Flirting was very much a part of HP about 12ths ago.
Met some wondeful and humourous writers here.
At least once a week someone got ,naked ,had too much to drink ,or argued shamelessly for 4 or 5 pages before the thread was closed down.
Then the flouce farewells would begin,well we still have them I guess ,just the drama is not as funny
It tends to more serious now,and dare I say a little uptight, well kinda ,sorta.
I guess its part of evolving
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