Should I choose the rich guy or the poor guy?

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Mamelodyposted 14 years ago
Ok am not usually one of them poops who bear the soul on the internet but since its becoming normal for people to pour out their troubles I figured I can share mine too..

Anyway I'm in a bit of a pickle so here goes..

Four months ago I met a lovely guy who is TDH (tall dark and handsome), absolute gentleman who is so sweet, passionate, loving and you know all the good stuff. He's got the whole package, lovely broad chest works out, has a five pack chest and well the goods down town are fabulous

A week later I met another guy, who has the same characteristics as the first guy.. he just has brown hair and a bit longer than the first guy.

They both make me laugh and we always have a good time and life just seems like heaven when I'm with either of them.

They both know about each other as I did not want to have any secrets so I spilled the beans and made it known. They've never met each other so it's all good until....

They both want a serious relationship and they both want me to move in with them..

Now both these guys are solid gems.. you know the prince charming we ladies always want and now I have two of them!

The only difference between these two guys is the issue of finance. The first guy is a rich guy, owns several businesses (construction and real estate business) and his annual net salary is over $1 million a year and he has it all. He's never been married, has no kids so he's looking to settle down.

Second guy is not as rich as the first guy.. he's a sales manager who just got laid off his job as his company closed down so presently he is unemployed but looking for work and has a daughter from a previous relationship.

Now financially, I don't need a man as I run my own hair salon and I work as a part time financial consultant and I got my own mortgage free house, two cars and I pretty much look after myself so money has nothing to do with how I feel about these two guys.

I like them both and I wish I could have them both but ultimately I have to choose one as they have both proposed that they want to take things to the next level.

What do I do? if you were in my shoes? who would you pick and why?
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  prettydarkhorseposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  tell them about your situation and see what their answers will be, the one who will say choose the one who will make you happy is the best man for you
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  Hmrjmr1posted 14 years agoin reply to this
  from a male perspective...
  I'm a widower so if it was me in the situation with ladies as such I would go for the money..
  
  But I would advise you that the guy with the bucks has earned them by long hours and hard work that are probably ingrained habits. It's not that he'll love you less but you have to know the biz is the biz, being independent yourself you may have a greater understanding of the sacrifices it takes to get so far.
  
  If you value companionship more, go with the poor man...
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  rebekahELLEposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  four months is not very long. you should know who you prefer.
  wish you could have both? do you love either of them?
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  Mr Niceposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  ♥♥♥ Since you are not sure, "Ménage à trois" sounds good in your situation because you like both of them & love neither one.
  If you can handle French style then it is ok, I am just kidding.
  If you think both of them sound, too good then choose the rich guy. If that doesn't work, forget about both of them because you are sooooooo beautiful & I am always available...hahaha. Don't think too much. I wish you good luck ♥♥♥
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  shazwellynposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  I think I would rather stay single... you have it all, so why don't you just say that you want to keep it the way it is for the time being. Let em both stew for a bit and see what happens. A solution will come into being sooner or later.
  
  Or do you want to settle down and have kids? What's the hurry?
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  Crazdwriterposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  OO I like that 'let them stew for a bit'
  Yep I agree. Like I said focus on YOU and other factors will fall into place Mamelody...Shaz has good sound advice too
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  Mamelodyposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  ditto
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  Mamelodyposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  now you're talking! I would give you one of them just to say thanks for the advice
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  shazwellynposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  err.. I think I would have em for dinner baby! hehehe
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  Jenna Popeposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  I would go with the righ guy, if I were you. It sounds like he has a lot less baggage.
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  Maximus591posted 14 years agoin reply to this
  My goodness.
  
  You silly little girl.
  
  You seem superficially frothy, a bit like a cream puff without the substance.
  
  Whatever decision you finally arrive at, I'm sure it will be in keeping with who you are as a person.
  
  Ouch.
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  Mamelodyposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  lol you sound like my aunt
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  Daniel Carterposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  Oink, oink!!! He tried to say!!!
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  NewYorkerposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  Rich guy, honey.. Rich guy.
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  cosetteposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  well neither one of them sounds interesting to me, but that's all right. i would hold off and date both of them and then choose the one who you feel happy with. only one person can make you feel that certain way. money and position have nothing to do with love.
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  KraZyDIposted 8 years agoin reply to this
  I think you should let the one who lost his job move in. Living with someone tells all. Plus it will show how responsible he is , in regards to getting another job.
  
  Tell the other guy your taking a test drive!
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  gmwilliamsposted 8 years agoin reply to this
  THE RICH GUY, DITCH THE POOR GUY!
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PrettyPantherposted 14 years ago
My simple answer to you is that if you don't know which one to "pick" as you put it, then perhaps you should not be with either of them.
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CMHypnoposted 14 years ago
Do you actually love either of these two guys? If you do, then the answer is easy - choose the one you love!
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Mamelodyposted 14 years ago
I do love them both the same.. which is the annoying part.. would have been easier if I loved one more than the other
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  PrettyPantherposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  I don't know, "annoyed" seems to be an awfully mild term to describe your feelings about being in love with two men at the same time. Are you sure you truly love either of them?
  
  I'm only saying this because I'm assuming since you posted your dilemma on an internet forum you were wanting honest feedback.
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  Mamelodyposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  Yep honesty is the best policy and to be honest I just want to be friends first but that seems to be going on deaf ears lol
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Bill Manningposted 14 years ago
It sounds to me like you really don't know them all that well yet. Everyone jumps too fast today. You don't know anyone well until after a year, and even then you'll find things out you did not.

Since your already well off the only thing you should be basing your decision on is how you feel about them. You must like one just a little bit more than the other.

Also, what about them? Does one seem to be in love with you more than the other? Will the well off guy get bored with you after a while since he can have whoever he wants?

I'd date them both a while more until you can really say for sure you want to be with one over the other. Regrets of lost loves suck big time!
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  Mamelodyposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  well they both have strong feelings for me but your right, and my instinct gut tells me not to rush into anything. I'd make a shitty girlfriend anyway lol
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  Bill Manningposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  I'm sure you make a great girlfriend, after all you have two hot guys that want you! But taking it slow is always the best when your undecided.
  
  Having said that, I myself can't bear to date a girl who is also seeing someone else. I'm an all or nothing type, I only date one girl at a time and I expect the same back.
  
  So I feel the guys pain of wanting to only date you only. But see if you can go a bit longer to give yourself more time. Maybe tell them both you want to see them for a month more, than you'll make your decision.
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  Mamelodyposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  I now know who to come to for advice.. Cheers mate excellent advice!
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  Bill Manningposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  Your welcome. Actually if you want great advice, I say date me for a bit, then decide between the three of us, lol!!
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  Mamelodyposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  LOL you're already breaking your rule of not dating a girl with too many men! tut tut!
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  Bill Manningposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  JK. Besides, Brazil would be a really, really long distance for a date since I'm in Florida. However if you ever take a Disney vacation,,,,,,
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  Mamelodyposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  men! can't say no to a pretty gal despite her having an army of men.. funny lot you are
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  tantrumposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  where did I heard this before ?
  
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  myownworldposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  ..probably in that 'pickup line' thread below....
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  tantrumposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  
  He said that to me like a month ago !
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  myownworldposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  THAT long ago???
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  tantrumposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  
  I think so !
  I remember because I hate Disneyworld !
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  myownworldposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  yeah...the thought....!
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  tantrumposted 14 years agoin reply to this
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  Mamelodyposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  finally something i have in common with tantrum.. our hatred of Disney world!
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  myownworldposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  oh you'll be surprised how much you can have in common with her - as do many men too I'm sure. She's like that: universal!
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  Mamelodyposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  I knew it.. he says that to all the girls right?
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  myownworldposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  Oh c'mon...atleast pretend for his sake to look impressed.....
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  Bill Manningposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  It's getting confusing to try to keep track of all these threaded post! What do you have against Disney? Don't you love the happiest place in the world!?
  
  Actually the only reason I mention Disney is because I live in Orlando, right next to it. Plus I have a tourist website about Disney, see? NOW you know why.
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  Mark Knowlesposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  You met a wonderful guy who has everything you want and still started dating some one else?
  
  And you are asking random strangers on the internet for advice as to which one to go for?
  
  I am going with, "yes," to this.
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  Mamelodyposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  
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  AdsenseStrategiesposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  Seconded... definitely
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  Mamelodyposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  well hello 007.. still looking yummy!
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  AdsenseStrategiesposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  I just realized you are from Brazil. Suddenly this thread makes a lot more sense
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  Mamelodyposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  well thank you.. usually Brazilians never make any sense
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  AdsenseStrategiesposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  Don't I know it. Although I have a really good friend who is Brazilian... mind you, he is a male....
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  Mamelodyposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  our men are predators thats's for damn sure...
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  tantrumposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  
  So we are neighbors ??
  Ha ha !
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  Mamelodyposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  I often wondered who the weirdo was next door.. nice to finally meet you
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  tantrumposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  I don't know about next door, but we have a frontier in common !
  
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IzzyMposted 14 years ago
I was going to suggest you marry the rich guy, then after a bit, divorce him and take him for everything!! (just joking guys!)
But it sounds as if you are not ready for committment with either of them. Don't rush into anything when you aren't sure. Take you time, chill out. You will know when it feels right.
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Mishaposted 14 years ago
Go for polyandry
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  Mamelodyposted 14 years agoin reply to this
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tantrumposted 14 years ago
Nice afternoon in salon story !

I'm not buying !
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  Mamelodyposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  oh don't worry.. it's on the house for you.. you was headline news in here
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  tantrumposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  do you want an autograph ?
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Pani Midnyte Odinposted 14 years ago
Who did you meet second? I think that's the one you should go with because the man you met first was obviously lacking if you picked up another guy. I think that would be the best decision for YOU.

But you also have to consider the feelings of the two men. BOTH want you to move in with them, which is a sign of commitment, and, from my experience, is a very hard step to take for a man. If a man wants to make a commitment to you, that means his feelings for you are very strong.

So, here is my advice: Take a break from both of them. See which one you miss the most or if you even miss them at all. Taking a break will give you a chance to clear your head.

Don't choose one just for the sake of having a boyfriend though. And don't keep stringing them along either. Men, although they often don't EXPRESS emotions, still HAVE emotions and they run just as deeply as a woman's.
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  Mamelodyposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  I met the rich guy first.. taking a break sounds like a good option too..
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alexandriaruthkposted 14 years ago
nice story, choose the poor guy and give me the rich guy,

BTW, choose the ONE you love, dont talk to them for one week and see whom you miss the most
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  Mamelodyposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  am sure we can make an arrangement
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myownworldposted 14 years ago
...did I just lose my way and walk into a dating site...again?
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  Bill Manningposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  There does seem to be a lot of horny people around here!
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  myownworldposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  you still there???
  
  ((( just girls having a laugh...you're alright....)))
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  Mamelodyposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  well if they were no horny people you wouldn't be here now, would you?
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alexandriaruthkposted 14 years ago
BILL is popular like BIll CLINTON
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  myownworldposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  yep, the man of the moment...!
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  Bill Manningposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  Thank you, thank you very much! Oh wait, that was sarcasm wasn't it? Ok I'll go away and do my own thing,,,,, I mean,,,, never mind,,,,,
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  myownworldposted 14 years agoin reply to this
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  tantrumposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  If you had said Venice, for example....
  
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  myownworldposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  or naples....or hell, even a cafe....
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  tantrumposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  But Disneyworld !...
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  myownworldposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  (((bill....billlllll...where are ya? tell why...why disneyland???)))
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  tantrumposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  Maybe he's a fetishist of some kind !
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  Bill Manningposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  LOL!!
  
  That's Walt Disney World! Disneyland is in Ca. I actually use to work at Disney for two years. One of my bosses went to jail there for holding bdsm orgies in a warehouse there, true story. Lots of perverts under those costumes!!
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  myownworldposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  you're forgiven.....!
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tantrumposted 14 years ago
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myownworldposted 14 years ago
(((hey T...there we are talking behind your back again...! ))
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  tantrumposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  
  I see
  thanks for the ad !
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  myownworldposted 14 years agoin reply to this
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Sa Toyaposted 14 years ago
you should let me meet them both, I'll tell you which I prefer, then you could have the other
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  myownworldposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  those poor guys.... being bartered right and left......my sympathies actually lie with them!
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  Sa Toyaposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  I couldn't agree more...I feel for them.
  
  I couldn't give any real advice because I just might come across harsh so I opted for humour.
  
  It's a sitiuation where someone is bound to get hurt!
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myownworldposted 14 years ago
Hey Mamelody, didn't mean to hijack your thread...just having some fun!
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  tantrumposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  I think she's gone to date one of them !
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  Sa Toyaposted 14 years agoin reply to this
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BEAUTYBABEposted 14 years ago
I have been reading some of the comments you have been getting to your question and from what I can tell you have been given quite a variety of suggestions to your questions.
My advise is to get to know both of these men for who they are inside, not for the amount of money or assets they have or have not. It is what a person is made up of inside them that counts, not they monetary values.
If you decided just say to go for the good looking one and he turns out to be a real rat, then you will wish that you had known him better before you got too involved with him. You might have to wait a while before you are sure, but wouldn't it be better to know what each of them have to offer in themselves, you just might be surprised what you find in the end. Good Luck with your endeavours. Beautybabe.
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Mamelodyposted 14 years ago
I'm sorry people, rich guy was on the phone and said to go out to candle light dinner by the riverside and poor guy showed up with flowers and chocolates on my door step...

I'm in heaven..

or

am I in hell
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  shazwellynposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  take the flowers and chocolates on the way to dinner... problem solved! Of course be open and honest about your intentions... get em in a fluster whilst you sit back and ... err... enjoy!
  
  Hey.. you may as well cos in the end, you just might have years of washing skiddy boxer shorts! lol x
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Crazdwriterposted 14 years ago
I hate to berak it to you Mamelody but no matter how many ppl respond to give you advice about the two...YOU are going to have to be the one who chooses between the two. it is all up to you not anyone else. Asking for advice was a good route to take but in the end, the only advice you can take from all of this is your own advice. you have to step back from the situtation and think it through on your own. If I were you, I would get off hubpages, close my eyes, and just think...or make a pros con list between the two. Take a break and really be serious about YOU and if either is still waiting that is theo ne for you. But again it is up to you, not us who you choose and you have to make that decision on your own.
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  Mamelodyposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  Get off hub pages? ... but your advice is good. Cheers.
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  Crazdwriterposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  hehe not forever Mamelody just for a bit. sheesh that would be like telling you to cut your arm off now
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  Mamelodyposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  more like chopping my head off!
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cheapmomposted 14 years ago
a woman who marries for money will always be poor. a woman who marries for love will never do without.
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  Mamelodyposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  another nincompoop who hasn't read the post!
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  Sara Tonynposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  She was giving you some sound advice based on what you told everyone. She's not a nincompoop, she's trying to help you.
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  tantrumposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  In what planet ?
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Sara Tonynposted 14 years ago
If you don't know which one you should hang on to and if you're letting money decide, I'm not sure you really care for either one very much. It doesn't sound like love at all to me -- especially since you're asking advice from strangers on the internet.

It seems obvious that you shouldn't move in with anyone until you figure out if you love either one of them.

Besides, dating two people at the same time is common. As long as you're not lying to either one about dating someone else, why not continue dating both and forget about moving in with one of them at this time?
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  Mamelodyposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  You know reading the post and understanding it would save you the embarrassment of silly responses
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  Sara Tonynposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  I did read it. You're the one who made money a factor when you asked who you should choose and mentioned one is rich and the other is poor.
  
  No need to be a smart arse when someone responds and you don't like their answer.
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  Mamelodyposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  I only said that was the only difference btwn the two blokes.. I also said I don't need a man financially so obviously I would not base my decision on money factor!
  
  FYI... I AM A SMART ASS!!!!
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  Sara Tonynposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  See, that's what you don't understand. You say you're financially independent and that's fine. Good for you.
  
  But the way you refer to the guys is in terms of money "as the only difference" so that says something even if you didn't intend it to.
  
  Well, you're half right.
  
  Good luck.
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Crazdwriterposted 14 years ago
Yea no chopping any limbs off mamelody lol that would just suck big time.
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Daniel Carterposted 14 years ago
You learn so very much about a person when stress hits. SO MUCH. Expectations about what should happen, the give and take, and so much more always are significant factors. Do you know them well enough to know their expectations? I don't jump into things until I know how the person will respond in a variety of situations. That takes time. Money can be an issue with most. So can ex lovers, children from past relationships, and then the really big surprises like substance abuse, money schemes and fraud, etc.

If at this point you like them both equally, it's only a matter of time before you'll gravitate toward one more than they other. (At least in my experience....)

Not knowing which one is right for you right now only means that it will take more time to get all the info you need about them both. If it were me, I would just enjoy the time you have with them both. If one can't handle that, then obviously that would be an indicator to consider.

Do keep us posted...
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  Mamelodyposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  I'm still allowed to join you in the shower right?
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  Daniel Carterposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  Life is complicated, but I'm not.
  Yes, please, any time!
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myownworldposted 14 years ago
my advice: send them both a link to this thread and see who still stays! He's your guy!
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  Mamelodyposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  oh no no no.. I do that and they'll run off with you and I'd have to get tantrum to scratch you with her leopard claws!
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  myownworldposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  well, for the record I'd go for the one who'd love me more!
  (in which case, the poor one will earn for you...and the rich will give you all....!
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  Mamelodyposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  I guess I can have my cake and eat it as well
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qwarkposted 14 years ago
Mame:
Is that a current pic of you?
If it is, you are a hot looking fem! If your body matches your face, you are even "hotter."
What are ya thinking?
You are young! Play girl! PLAY!
You've got plenty of time left to get serious.
"Sack" em both. Enjoy 'em!
When you are ready to make a decision, it'll come to ya'.
In the meantime, use 'em for your and their enjoyment! Bring and continue to bring joy into the world!...:-)
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  Mishaposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  Considering the history of her avatars - likely no
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  Mamelodyposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  and may I ask is that you on your avatar?
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  Mishaposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  Sure you may. Yes, this is me.
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  shazwellynposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  now mame... Misha is a real man.. strong, honest and hot (well, he is after I have whipped him a few times eh?) hehehe
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  Mamelodyposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  Now you're talking.. no more feeling guilty eh? ok I'm gonna have my cake and eat it too!
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  qwarkposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  Mame:
  Amen girl! Go For the fun of it! :-)
  Yer lying about yer pic Mame...lol
  Life is here for you to have fun...enjoy it!
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  Mamelodyposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  aren't you a sweet thiang!
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  Mamelodyposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  No that ain't me.. its my cousin. I ain't a pretty sight so i "borrowed" her pic
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drej2522posted 14 years ago
that's me in my avatar...
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  Mamelodyposted 14 years agoin reply to this
  and what a cutey you are!.. you don't snore do ya?
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Should I choose the rich guy or the poor guy?

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Should I choose the rich guy or the poor guy?

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