Curfews for kids

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   Uninvited Writerposted 14 years ago

   You know, I was always against curfews when I was younger, I thought it impinged on my rights.
   
   Well, I am rethinking that belief. Not for the kids, but for the parents who it seems would rather endanger their children than say no to them.
   
   I bring this up because of the parents in my apartment building who let their children as young as 8 play in the playground out front until 10 pm most nights. The parents are not usually with them, I don't think an 8 year old can adequately take care of a 3 year old. The younger ones (like 3 and 4 year olds) do usually come in around 9 when a parent will collect them. 
   
   It would be different if it was in their own yard but there are 21 floors in this building, 10 apartments per floor. You don't know what type of people are living here. I would hate for one of these kids to disappear.
   
   Anyway, I had to rant...

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      sandra rinckposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      That is dangerous. I know my parents let us do it when we were kids but we only got to stay out until 9 and always had to be a whistle away.  If he whistled and we weren't at the house in 5 minutes we got our butts whooped.

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   dohn121posted 14 years ago

   To me, this sounds like a perfect recipe for disaster.  The parent(s) of these children must be irresponsible and lazy.  I can see your concern and if I had to guess, it sounds like you're on the fence about reporting their parent(s), but you have enough sense not to, fearing that you might hurt rather than hinder the delicate balance of coexistence between you and your neighbors...Are you friends with other neighbors where you live?  What are their thoughts on the matter?

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   Uninvited Writerposted 14 years ago

   I don't know many of my neighbors and I don't know the ones with kids. I doubt I could report them them to any authorities any way. I just had to rant a bit because I can't really do anything about it.

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      Eaglekiwiposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      I feel you frustration and concern UW.
      
      Think in the end you have two choices really
      
      Do nothing
      Or be as vigilant as parent might be. (knows ya probably already doin the latter)...
      
      Generally parents now are either lazy or ignorant IMO.

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   B.Z. Alixandreposted 14 years ago

   I wouldn't have called it curfew...I'd call it bed time.  You are absolutely right to be concerned.  It is a dangerous thing and it is the parents' responsibility.  When something happens to those kids, they won't take responsibility then either.  I've learned over years in EMS and lifeguarding that lazy, bad, and even "trendy" parents are a recipe for disaster where kids are concerned.

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      Uninvited Writerposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      Yes, a lot of the parents here don't believe in bedtime. I've been woken up by kids running down the hallway at midnight.

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   Stacie Lposted 14 years ago

   not to toot my own horn but I posted a hub on this subject recently
   http://hubpage.com/hub/should-we-have-juvenile-curfews
   

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      Uninvited Writerposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      Weird, I get what looks like a 404 page in Chinese or Japanese.
      
      I found the hub through your profile...very strange

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         B.Z. Alixandreposted 14 years agoin reply to this

         me too, my computer says its Korean

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   dohn121posted 14 years ago

   When I was 12, while walking to school one morning, which was about a 2 miles away, a black van began following me.  I thought it suspicious that it was...My first though was that the person might be looking for an address but once I turned the corner, the van continued following me.  Although I didn't look at the driver, I remember being scared, with the fear that maybe the driver's partner was going to jump out and grab me that I hightailed out of there and before I knew it, I was in school, home-free and telling my story over and over again to my teacher.
   
   Deep in my heart, I sensed danger.  I just knew that that black van and its driver was up to no good.  I heard on the news (back then) of children being abducted--that was around the time milk companies were placing pictures of missing children on their cartons. And that was the thought that hit me--I did not want to be one of those kids, no matter what.
   
   When I was asked if I got the license plate number on the van, I told my teacher I didn't.  I was so scared that I didn't have time to.  Mind you, I lived in one of the richest neighborhoods in America--in the suburbs on Westchester, with the likes of Matt Dillon and Joan Rivers. But all of that doesn't matter when you have crooked people venture down from the inner cities.  There's no stopping them from coming in.

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      Uninvited Writerposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      Wow, that is scary.

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   Beth100posted 14 years ago

   This is a situation that will eventually have bad results.  It's difficult to decide what to do but ultimately, it's the children that have to be thought of.  There are courses for marriage, self improvement, birthing and so on.  These are great, but perhaps how to raise children and education on basic safety is required before becoming parent is required for some people. 
   
   I can understand your frustration and concern.

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   Rochelle Frankposted 14 years ago

   Maybe you could suggest a "neighborhood watch" for your building, with people taking turns with cell phone binoculars and digital camera at the ready?-- or would that just make it easier for people to think they don't need to watch their own?

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      Stacie Lposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      http://hubpages.com/hub/Should-There-Be … le-Curfews
      try this instead..

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      B.Z. Alixandreposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      But it goes back to responsibility.  We should be able to trust our neighbors and be comfortable to have our children around them.  But its not the nieghbor's responsibility to raise the child.  Or even to keep it safe.  If a neighborhood watch was established, and something happened to kids, then it wouldn't surprise me even a little bit if the parents blamed the neighborhood watch. 
      
      The reason lifeguards exist is because children died because their parents didn't teach them either to stay out of the water or how to be in the water, and then didn't watch them in the water.  That is the reason why I had a seven year career in aquatics.  Because parents who aren't responsible for their kids put those kids at incredible risk.

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   Envoyposted 14 years ago

   lol I could not help but drop in to say this very thing was the reason I was awaken two weeks ago this Friday @ 3 in the am to a loud knock on my door.  :0o
   
   A police officer was standing there & informed me there was someone trying to break into my house- whom was now in the back of the officers police  car having been arrested at gun point by 4 responding officers. One of which was himself.
   We found out later that night my 17 yo daughter's bf who is really not a bad kid at all- was sneaking to her window to see her & got caught by 4 police officers with their guns drawn!! hee hee ha ha ha ha
   
   They charged him with being out after curfew because he is under 18. Curfew is like 11:00pm they towed his truck so his whole weeks pay check went towards that & he goes to court in a few weeks.
   Needless to say he said he will NEVER be out after curfew again!
   
   I just had to share that I am still LMAO!

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    Mishaposted 14 years ago

    May be we just let other people live their lives as they see fit?

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    Angel Of Loveposted 14 years ago

    Leaving small, three-year-old kids on the playground till 10 PM is pure and simple negligence.

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    Mishaposted 14 years ago

    Other people may think differently

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       Uninvited Writerposted 14 years agoin reply to this

       But the screaming and yelling bothers everyone else in the building also.

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          Eaglekiwiposted 14 years agoin reply to this

          Maybe take it up with management ,I know we all as tenants have obligations after 10:30pm ,something like that basically around noise issues.

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          Mishaposted 14 years agoin reply to this

          No question about that Susan. Having a kid who just screams for fun, we choose a place to live so nearest neighbors can't hear him.

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    Michele Arrvinteposted 14 years ago

    When I was 4 my brother was 8 and he took good care of me. He even cook.
    It is a big misconception that 8 years old children can not take appropriate care of their younger brothers and sisters.
    
    In Africa 11 years old girls are already considered wives and can give birth. I don't say that it is ok, just an example of the capabilities of human beings at younger age. It's just not fair to divide people by age as it was not fair to divide them by race and sex. Only several decades ago women were considered unfit to vote and were juridically dependent of their husbands.
    
    It is sad to read how you worry of children being kidnapped.
    When I was a children nobody was worried about these kind of things. And it was ok that all children were playing in the playground till 10 pm.
    I believe that American society is degrading in spite of all the scientific and technical advances, and a curfew for children will not change it.

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       Lisa HWposted 14 years agoin reply to this

       I agree that young children can amazingly capable when it comes to doing some types of things; but "dividing by age" is a very different thing than doing that by race or gender.   The human brain is not fully matured until early to mid twenties.  Children can be extremely "smart" in a lot of ways, but their immature brains and emotional maturity is not equal to an adult's.  They also have the disadvantage of physical smallness (as far as the matter of any human or animal threats that could be "out there" in the night).  Thinking children should be protected, inside the house at night, and - ideally - in bed at a decent time isn't about being "unfair".  It's about understanding that children's brains and bodies are growing, and that the right food and sleep habits help a child stay healthy and grow best.
       
       I'm the first to say that it looks like American society is going downhill these days, but I think one thing most good parents in America do get right is the aim to preserve childhood for their children and protect them.  While it isn't all that common that a stranger takes a child, does "whatever", and murders him; there are no "do-overs" if your child was that victim.  Also, though, it's very common for people to molest children but not murder them.  I find it hard to believe that's just an American thing.  Mental-case-freaks who want to find child victims know to look for the children who have parents who aren't paying enough attention. 
       
       I'm not in favor of the unhealthy practice of not letting children grow without having a parent always breathing down their neck, but there's a big difference between that and letting your kids be out without you at night.  Besides, children in American should ideally also learn what is polite and acceptable in society; and being out yelling and playing and bothering the neighbors at a time when people have a right to expect a little quiet isn't being a good neighbor.
       
       The fact that 11-year-old girls are even capable of giving birth is a sign that something is wrong in a society.  In America today a concern is that girls in some socio-economic groups are physically maturing earlier than they once did.  That's not a good sign.  Ferule cats are known to be physically able to give birth earlier than domestic cats; and the presumption is that life in the wild (where they don't have the luxury of being cared for and protected) can alter hormones in a way that contributes to premature physical maturity.
       
       American (and, since Uninvited Writer lives in Canada, I guess Canadian) society may seem to be going downhill these days; but, again, I think one thing the best parents have very right is the idea that children should be protected and taught what's acceptable in society.  What's "unfair" is that some children are born to parents who let them grow like weeds (with none of the protection, teaching, and supervision of childhood) in socially and technologically complex and huge society like America's.   I agree that it is sad that we have to worry about our children being kidnapped, but one reason we do is that we are fortunate enough to have been made aware that this can happen.  There was a time (in America, Canada, and everywhere else) when this stuff went on and not much was said about it in the national news.

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    Mishaposted 14 years ago

    If I was not your fan already, I would become one on the spot

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    Eaglekiwiposted 14 years ago

    UW
    I never had a curfew as a teenager ,my dad used what they would call today , reverse physcology ie "I trust you know a good time to be home, I will let you decide a good time to be home"
    
    My friends thought it was so cool, however I thought the responsiblity sucked (at the time). BUT it worked (for me)..
    
    Your problem sounds similar to mine , we too live in an apartment ,though the noisy ones are older, early 20's,honking car horns , yelling to each other across the street ( like everyone needs to hear how cool JayZ is..or its raining -11pm at night)....
    
    Guess we come from a generation that were taught how to show respect to your neighbour.
    The kids on my street are not bad kids, but certainly more self oriented than I was.
    
    And to comment on something Misha said. Letting them live their life etc, thats fine if it doesnt interfere constantly with anothers.

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    Mishaposted 14 years ago

    Kiwi, I did not think behavior was the point, I thought Susan was rather worried about something bad happening to the kids.

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       Eaglekiwiposted 14 years agoin reply to this

       Yep but one often leads to another,or at least the consequences .

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       Uninvited Writerposted 14 years agoin reply to this

       That is the main thing. I just really wanted to vent because, really, it is up to the parents.

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    \Brenda Scullyposted 14 years ago

    it is so sad to watch a situation develop that you can do nothing about....  i have a solution, come and live near by the beach it is soooooo peaceful

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    SweetiePieposted 14 years ago

    Kids were skateboarding outside on both sides of our complex at all hours of the night before school started a week ago.  For the most part they are not very loud, but my sister has commented on seeing them out in the middle of the night skate boarding up and down the sidewalks.  Supposedly we have a security guard that monitors our buildings, so I am not sure if the kids hide when they come around, or if they just do not care.  Personally since our complex is very quiet it does not bother me, but I wonder if parents realize their kids are out at all hours of the night. 
    
    Another thing I find amusing about the open high school campus in our town is these kids play hooky more than any I have ever seen.  When we were in high school they clamped down on us ditching class, but in the middle of the day here you can see kids at Starbucks, Subway, and just cruising the brick sidewalks.  I realize some kids have certain periods off from class, but it is pretty obvious other are just ditching lol.

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    Davinagirl3posted 14 years ago

    It sounds as if these kids are not being disciplined at all.  This is not an unusual problem.  This is one of my biggest pet peeves.  What are the parents doing while their children are roaming free?  More than likely they are loving the fact that their children are not around them.  We have some little girls in our neighborhood who knock on doors and ask if anyone has kids for them to play with.  Some kids were never taught boundaries.  If you are going to let your children play out on the streets, at least give them some pointers about safety.  I think the parents just kick them out to get them out of their hair.  It is sad and pathetic.  I was always allowed to play outside with friends, but we lived in a wooded area with a lot of room to roam and still be on our own property.  We had to be in by the time the streetlights came on.

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