After having a bad marriage and few years later you fall in love again, should

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  1. neeta chauhan profile image62
    neeta chauhanposted 13 years ago

    After having a bad marriage and  few years later you fall in love again, should you get married ?

    If you have a single parent who is ill should you think about your life and get married ?
    i am specifically talking about daughters who have to live with their husbands and have to leave their homes.....

  2. graceomalley profile image84
    graceomalleyposted 13 years ago

    I think this is a complicted question, and every situation is going to be different.

    Some guidelines in making the decision:

    1) Figure out what went wrong in the first marriage. It is entirely possible, and quite common, to keep being attracted to people with the same set of problems - some women fall for charming abusers over and over, some are drawn to fun but irresponsible men. before committing a second time, be sure she resolved the issues that led to the first marriage ending.

    2) Be clear with the new spouse-canidate about obligations she has to others. If a new husband is willing to accept the fact that she has ailing parents (we probably all will at some point) that should be no barrier to marriage. If he has assumptions her other obligations will take a back seat to him - that needs to be up front.

    3) Is she simply in love, or is this real marriage material? Being in love is lovely, but you need alot more compatibility, plus shared goals in life to take a romantic relationship to the marriage level. Maybe just having a romance is what she really wants right now. She doesn't have to get married every time she falls in love.

    4) Take time. Sounds like she has a complicated life. You know what they say,"Marry in haste, repent at leisure."

  3. neeta chauhan profile image62
    neeta chauhanposted 13 years ago

    Hi Graceomalley,
    thanks for replying my question such detail but my question is still more or less the same the woman ended her marriage because the issue was with the husband not the wife and after taking so much from the husband she decided to end the marriage because he was mentally sick.
    Secondly this woman's second marriage candidate has no problems with going ahead with the marriage its the woman who feels guilty at times that maybe she is being selfish while how will her single parent live alone.
    This is 100% marriage material because she does not want to lead the rest of her life on romantic platform but finally a home to live in with him. Their compatability is sky high they think alike because they are of the same zodiac sign and the woman's family likes the man a lot should the woman go for it even now? what do you think....

  4. Levertis Steele profile image76
    Levertis Steeleposted 13 years ago

    Being in love does not mean that either party is ready for marriage. When in doubt, leave it alone. When it feels right without any reservations, go for it.

  5. moonfairy profile image74
    moonfairyposted 13 years ago

    only YOU can answer that question. I got divorced in 1985 and swore I'd never remarry, but in 2004 I met "the one" and when he popped the question after only knowing each other for 4 months, my answer was yes.

  6. Hubpage Gal profile image60
    Hubpage Galposted 13 years ago

    The answer to the question of remarriage can only be answered by the two people involved in the relationship. One would think that the previously married would be extra careful in choosing a second mate because no one likes to have participated in a failed relationship.  If the question is about a daughter, then she should be mature to make the choice to remarriage based on her own experiences and not in obeyance of a parent.

  7. juiwei2000 profile image61
    juiwei2000posted 13 years ago

    There is an old saying "fool me once, shame on you.  Fool me twice, shame on me." the most important thing is to take your experience from your first failed marriage and use it in a manner, so you won't make the same mistake again, in what might be a second marraige or to prevent you from getting into another problematic marriage to begin with.

 
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