What are some effective ways to discipline lying?
I know it depends on the age, but how do you teach a child that lying is not okay. Should you consider all lying the same, or should you ignore story telling?
I think that for my daughter, her "storytelling" and lying are easily discernible. She does not lie very often. I think I may have caught her in 2.
Finding out why, and make sure you sit down and speak face-to-face, eye-to-eye. When my 8-year-old daughter recently told a lie, it was because I was on the computer upstairs and she was downstairs, and she was dishonest about what she ate for breakfast. In this case it was a doughnut, and she said it was bread. When I discovered the half-eaten doughnut, I asked her "eye-to-eye" what she actually ate for breakfast, and she told the truth.
I told her that I prefer her to be honest about her breakfast choice, even if it isn't the best choice - that truth is better. We also discussed the issue of the habit of lying taking away your freedom...and adding to the fear of being caught. The truth really does set one free.
Since my husband is the one who brought home the doughnut, and therefore presented the temptation....he was instrumental in the issue. He said that he wasn't going to bring home any doughnuts for a while because she had disappointed him by lying around it, and not honoring his intention for the doughnut - a dessert to be shared by the 3 of us.
Also, afterward, it may also be effective to discuss a story about a child who lies and what happens to her or him...such as "Peter and the Wolf" (I think it's an Aesop fable)..
It is important that the "discipline" fits the "crime," and that the only way to make amends for a lie is an apology and resolution to tell the truth from then on in. Next time I ask her something, it will be face-to-face. It was too easy for her to lie when she isn't looking at me face-to-face.. It decreases the temptation if that temptation is there.
Well - I am a divorced mother of two teeny sons. I have some effective discipline lying rules in my house.
- If one of my sons is lying for the first time, I give him one demerit. He has to do one or two chores for at least 7 days without complaining or striking out.
- If he does lie again for the second time, I give him a second demerits, He lost his allowance (or reward) and he will have to do two or three chores at home without complaining or striking out.
- If he does lie again for the third times, I have to take his iphone away, he lost his allowance, and he will do three - four chores at home without complaining or striking out.
Every month, demerits will be cleared and count again.
It really works better :-)
Good advice. There needs to be consequences the child can understand.
I agree that it depends on the age of the child, and what the lie pertains to. Sometimes by understanding why they may be lying, will help understand how to stop it. I think it is not about punishing them, but getting them to stop it. I wrote a hub about lying a few months ago. Maybe this will help. http://toknowinfo.hubpages.com/hub/Lyin … h-the-Ages
by Angela Michelle Schultz 4 years ago
My daughter is going through a phase where she is lying a lot. It's not about big stuff, and she's pretty honest about if she does wrong things. But she will lie to try to get her way. I am trying to figure out how to get over this hump.
by williearl 7 years ago
How do you trust your wife after she lies over and over and blames you for why she constantly lies
by Charlu 11 years ago
Do you know someone that lies consistently and do you confront them or let it go?Some people lie to make themselves look better and I think some just do it out of habit. If someone lies to you on a regular basis do you confront them or are you afraid they'll get defensive and let it go?
by Margaret Ann Tyler Johnson 12 years ago
Why do parents get upset that their child/children have lied to them? Why was it okay for them to lie on their behalf? Do you as a parent firmly believe it's a difference between a little white lie, a good lie, or a partial lie?
by Joan Whetzel 11 years ago
What would be a good reason to lie?What would be a bad reason to lie?
by Flowering Heart 8 years ago
Why do people disguise who they reaaly are, why do people lie, is it possible to be 100% honest?Lying does it exist because of that fear of rejection takes over our very being, is it because we do not trust anyone truly. In life would things be turned upside down if you would simply never make...
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