What do you to help control your temper?
I find that when I think someone is disrespecting me, I get extremely angry and find it hard to let it go. What do you do when other's upset you? How do you control your temper?
In my late 20's, I started just fighting it head-on. Took many years, and you won't find the "technique" in any anger management class, but I just flat-out wasn't going to let Anger beat me once I admitted (to myself) that I did in fact have a problem. I treated it as the enemy it was and...killed it in Mortal Kombat.
Took years before I started seeing results, but in the end it worked for me.
In many cases, things are not what they seem, and if you would just take the trouble to find out by simply asking the other person or looking at things from the other person's perspective, you might see a completely different picture and find that your anger have been misdirected.
Anger is a part of everyone's life. Everyone will deal with it in a different way, so the only thing that I can share with you is my view. First of all I believe that our society teaches us to care about what another. Which is really a good thing in a way but it is not good to have to meet the expectations of others, because it can not be done. We are not clones to one another. Each person has their own life to live and if we listen to what everybody else wants us to be, we will be in a nut house. I am a believer in Jesus Christ but I believe in Jesus in a different way than 99% of Christians. Jesus teaches about anger and all issues we have in life. His words have been my guide in learning about issues such as this. I have published a webpage regarding this very same issue and how anger comes about in our lives at www.jesusism.net/jesus_anger.html He also provides answers to the most intimate questions of life.
In my experience, I handle my anger depending on the environments, who is making me angry and how much the incident affects me. The only difference now is that no matter what, at least I do not explode as I used to do. I use the technique of not showing how angry I am with my body but I make sure to communicate how much I dislike what is going on and I stand by what I say thru firm words. By doing this I know I am stronger than the other person and I stay in peace.
Listing to music dancing and share our thoughts to our friends
Anger is healthy when it is not directed at the person but on the situation that triggers the anger, but it could be unhealthy if it's bottled up inside in which later will turn to rage...You're easily irked if something triggers you due to unresolved issues in the past...I am now resolving my issues, and looking at situations in a different perspective...Thus, I no longer feel that I am against the world...
Not speaking has been the best solution for me. Instead of letting anger gain control of my tongue, I just hold it in, and then let it work out of my system as I focus on other, better things, going on in my life.
Spirituality is the best way to control over anger....making oneself spiritually strong really helps a lot ....being spiritual never means that one shud change their attire or keep oneself busy in holy books & rituals etc all day long ...but it simply means to have full trust in God & keep our mind stable and cool in all adverse come what may. yoga & mind concentration works well in this direction ....ones we attain this status, no comment or provoking can perturb us & we can keep our mind cool & anger free.
It is upto the person to control his/her temper especially when others irritate or provoke him/her. The person should ignore others's rudeness and keep a distance from them. Controlling temper like this improves the person's character and hence he/she get more respect than before. Yoga and pranayama (breathing excercises) help one in not only getting the peace of mind but also controlling one's temper in harsh situations to a great extent.
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