how to deal with a person who is totally negative and threatens to commit suicide?...have no faith in humans nor god nor himself...now is there any way out for such people?..
find one thing that can make him smile or laugh. that would be his cure
Try to know the reason why he has lost faith in everything
Is this person under therapy. I think he/she needs help, find a good psychiatrist for him/her.
Find a different therapist if there's only been one or two. There are a couple of reasons this might help:
A) Therapy as a profession has good ones and crappy ones just like any profession that involves humans.
B) There are several types of therapy, and sometimes one approach (say, cognitive therapy) doesn't work so another type (say psycho-analycial or bio-chemical or behavioral or whatever) might.
Just a thought. I'd definately get help. Doing it alone is probably not the best answer.
Put him in environment where there is no stress and lots of fun. Humor does help. And don't try to brainwash with god, soul and aim of life thingy. Those things backfire more than they could help. Just go ahead with whatever works with him. Then add small positive changes in his life like those "happy camps" etc.
Take the threat of suicide seriously. How exactly would he like to kill himself? As Hitchcock says, its hard to kill a person, even harder yourself.
Would he like to hang himself for example? If so he should make sure he breaks his neck. This is a combination of the length of drop and his weight, but if he's depressed he'll not be eating and will be losing weight. He doesn't want the rope to slowly crush his windpipe over half an hour? Or does he? He should keep weighing himself and use the drop formula.
Cut his wrists? He shouldn't think he can just sit in a hot bath, cut one wrist and expect to be able to cut the other one. He has to cut along and not across the wrist, otherwise he'll cut the tendon - then he won't be able to do the other one.
He mustn't just throw himself off the bridge without checking first whether the tide's out.
These events require meticulous planning, even though no-one else cares how they work out.
Bore the self indulgent prick to death....or a new sense of life, who knows?
I am into non evasive holistic healing methods.
Go to Youtube and type in "emotional freedom technique" or "eft tapping" for short. It will teach you how to do this stress releasing technique. Also, there a trained therapist and counselors who know EFT and its predecessor called TFT (Thought Field Therapy). Both demos can be found on Youtube. Also, "google" for each technique and you will find quite a list to choose from.
emotional freedom technique
roger callahan thought field therapy
Just being there to give support is helpful, as many times all they need is support and a empathetic ear. I had a friend who is that way and I was emotionally drained at times talking to her because she was so negative. So I would be careful not to get sucked in, ( I know from experience).
I agree that getting sucked in is a huge danger...and a person can only be helped if they want to be. I have a friend who I tried to help for a while, but no matter what happened she'd find some way to stay in a crisis-type position because the attention she got from it was much more than if she'd been healthy. Now I limit my contact with her when she's in her especially negative moods, and consequently those moods don't show up as often. Whenever she says she feels like she might hurt herself I offer to send an ambulance for her so she can be under supervision in the hospital until she feels safe. If she ever got to the point that she really, really wanted to kill herself there's really nothing anyone could do to stop her, people find a way somehow regardless of what anyone else does, so all I can really do is remind her that there is help and support here and not get so wrapped up that she takes me down with her.
I think there's "totally negative" and "apparently out-and-out-depressed". Negative people are sometimes negative because they're depressed, but some are just negative by nature. Someone who threatens suicide is a whole other matter.
That person needs professional help. In the meantime, there is information, guidance, and support available for people who live with someone who have depression. Living with someone who has depressed has its own challenges for the non-depressed person. I think if the other person does or does't get help, one thing is that the person living with someone like that consider seeking guidance or support for himself. Other than that, take breaks away from that person if at all possible. People need to re-charge their "batteries" and get away from negativity every once in awhile.
I agree with those who say to take the threat of suicide seriously. I do NOT agree with the person who referred to this person as a "self-indulgent little prick."
Mental illness, which is what depression is, is a horrlbe reality to live in.
I don't know where you live, but I imagine if you call 411 or look in the phone book you can find a suicide prevention hotline.
If the person is acting erractically and does appear to be a threat to himself or others, definitely call the police and have hhim committed for observation into a psych hospital.
This may already be in the mix, but if it is not, the person should be under the care of a PSYCHIATRIST -- not just a therapist.
Finally, try to remember that you are not responsible for how this person feels. If someone has lost all of their faith they really need trained professionals (mental health, spiritual adviser).
Good luck to your friend.
I totally agree with everything Mighty Mom has said here.
I would only add that if at all possible, if you need the police to come, remind your friend that voluntarily hospitalizing him/herself is a much better position to be in than being committed by court order.
I am agree with Mighty Mom. Your friend needs professional help, you can stay close to him for a help in this partcolare moment of his life.
I run across people like this regularly in my job. It's almost like they've lost all ambition for anything...stagnant. All one can do is say encouraging, positive things to them & hope it sinks in.
My question would be if this person has always been this way, or if they used to behave differently. I'm also curious how long you've known them, and the nature and depth of your relationship.
It is very likely this person is depressed, although it is possible they are simply using threats of suicide to gain attention. Either way, the threat needs to be taken seriously. It is not, however, a burden you need shoulder alone, especially if it is someone you do not know well or do not feel close to. And either way, this person needs help from a qualified professional.
The rest of this assumes that depression is the cause.
Talk to people close to this person - close friends and family - and share your concerns, but be discreet. This will take some of the pressure off of you, and lessen your exposure to the negativity, while building a greater support system to help this person.
Whether this person is depressed specifically because of some events or circumstances in their life, or whether it seems to have no definitive cause is an important distinction. Psychoanalysis does little to help those with clinical depression, and while talk therapy may be beneficial, this person should also see a psychiatrist who can prescribe medication if warranted.
The best thing that you can do to help this person is simply to be there for them. Let them know that you are available to them should they want to talk, or simply want company, and that you want to help, in whatever way works best for them. Don't force yourself on them. Don't try to talk them out of their feelings.
It sounds like faith is important to you, but in this situation, it is best to keep it to yourself for now. At this point, lack of faith in God should be the least of your concerns. This person needs love and support from the people they can see and touch more than anything.
I hope this is of some help.
Also, another treatment option I highly recommend looking into is Neurofeedback. It is extensively researched and has been proven to help immensely, and even 'cure' PTSD, depression, and many other things. It is entirely non-invasive, does not require any traditional sharing of feelings, and a session consists of sitting in a chair staring at a computer screen for an hour while the practitioner monitors brain waves on another monitor and adjusts the program accordingly. I know people who have done Neurofeedback, and the help it has provided is unbelievable.
If someone tried shoving god down my throat I would want to kill myself too... why do people always think that finding "god" will cure depression.. what a lot of rubbish...
Advise them to go to the doctor and get help, if they won't go you can't make them, just don't help them with their problems...
by seanorjohn 8 years ago
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