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The Morning Conversations of Barack & Michelle Obama #26

Updated on April 10, 2012
Brouillade de truffes
Brouillade de truffes
Crepes with Salted Butter Caramel
Crepes with Salted Butter Caramel

October 11, 2011 - Crepes, Truffles and Sugar Cain

A fictional (and satirical) account of the private morning conversations of Barack & Michelle Obama by Dexter Yarbrough. Number 26 in the series.

Barack: (Entering the White House kitchen, smiling) Good morning, Michelle!

Michelle: Good morning. Why are you skinnin' and grinnin'?

Barack: I am just happy to see you!

Michelle: Oh. I thought you had been listening to Bill Clinton tell you about his under-the-desk, mouth-to-genitals love stories.

Barack: Michelle! The kitchen staff is nearby! And no, I haven't been talking to Bill Clinton! Although, he does have some great stories!

Michelle: Whatever!

Barack: What are you having for breakfast?

Michelle: I don't know. TYRONE!

Tyrone: (Presents himself to the President and First Lady) Good morning!

Michelle: Good morning. What do you suggest for breakfast?

Tyrone: Yes, ma'am! I would suggest the brouillade de truffes and the crepes with salted butter caramel.

Barack: What's brou-

Tyrone: It's a special eggs with black truffles recipe.

Michelle: You're just going to gulp it down without tasting it anyway!

Barack: We will have what you suggested, Tyrone. Thanks.

Tyrone: Yes, Mr. President.

Tyrone
Tyrone

Michelle: Tyrone, are you preparing our meal?

Tyrone: No, ma'am. I have some guest chefs in from Paris. They will prepare breakfast this morning.

Michelle: OK, great. Let them know what we will be having and come back and join us for a moment.

Tyrone: Right away, ma'am! (leaves to place order)

Barack: What do you want to talk to him about?

Michelle: Tyrone has a sense for what is happening in the world. I just want to get his feel on a few issues.

Barack: Well don't embarrass me. You tried that the last time you had him "talk" with us.

Michelle: Now why would I want to embarrass you? You do so well on your own!

Barack: Michelle!

Michelle: Just kidding! Can't you take a joke?

Barack: Yep. I married you! Ha ha ha!!!

Michelle: Thanks for coming back Tyrone!

Tyrone: Yes, ma'am.

Michelle: Have a seat. I was wondering what your feelings are for some of the Republican contenders?

Tyrone: Are you sure you want my opinion? The last time, I felt a bit uncomfortable.

Michelle: No problem. Speak your mind!

Tyrone: Well, I think Perry is just a younger George Bush. I hope we don't go down that road again.

Barack: What about Romney?

Michelle: (sarcastically) Oh, so now you are interested in what Tyrone has to say?

Barack: (waves hand at Michelle) Go on, Tyrone.

Tyrone: And Romney is a liberal in disguise - no offense to liberals.

Barack: (coughs while drinking coffee)

Michelle: Interesting. What about Ron Paul?

Tyrone: The equivalent of Ross Perot. A has-been.

Michelle: Ha ha ha!!

Barack: And Bachmann?

Tyrone: Well, if my child got sick and needed the HPV vaccine, I wouldn't go to her!

Barack: Ha ha ha!!!

Michelle: Ha ha ha!!!

Tyrone: Now, Herman Cain, is a good candidate.

Barack: (stops laughing) Oh, why is that Tyrone?

Tyrone: (glances over at Michelle)

Michelle: Go ahead, Tyrone. The President isn't thin-skinned. Are you "touchy?"

Barack: Michelle!

Tyrone: Herman Cain is a breath of fresh air. He is non-political, served admirably in the military, was an outstanding businessman and wants this country to move forward.

Barack: Herman Cain avoided the civil rights movement, denies that black's are still being discriminated against and ran a pizza operation. The guy is a Clarence Thomas cloned, new-aged Uncle Tom!

Michelle: Well, I agree that as a conservative, Herman Cain can't adequately represent the American People. But how many demonstrations did you march in, Barack? And what business did you turn around and make profitable? And weren't you yelling at black people the other day telling them to stop crying and complaining?

Barack: Well...

Leroy
Leroy

Michelle: Well is for water!!

Barack: Well, you asked me earlier why I was smiling. I figured you would trick Tyrone into enticing me, so I called your friend Leroy to help me out!

Michelle: (shocked) You called Leroy?

Barack: Damn, right! He told me just how to handle Herman Cain. Yep, he said that all I need to do is use a combination of ebonics and a derivation of his name and I could make fun of him!

Michelle: (still shocked)

Barack: This is what Leroy said...

Michelle: Barack...

Barack: Yo! Dude is sweet! In da hood he is known as (Herman) Sugar CAIN!

Michelle: Ummm...

Barack: Man, I feel like gettin' high! I'm goin' to get me some (Herman) Crack CoCAIN! Is you down wif dat?

Michelle: (slumps in seat)

Barack: Gurl, I had to go to da dentist today. Mah teef hurt bad. Glad he used some (Herman) NovoCAIN!

Tyrone: (leaves to check on breakfast)

Barack: Mah gurlfrind is phat. Her thighs rub together when she walks. Now she itchin'. I got's ta git her some (Herman) LanaCAIN at da store!

Michelle: Barack!

Barack: Man, mah wifey said I ijakulate too fass. She told me ta git the condoms that got (Herman) BenzoCAIN!

Tyrone: Breakfast is served!

Michelle: I'm going to kill Leroy!

Barack: (laughing hysterically)

Stay Tuned for More 'Morning Conversations...' with Barack & Michelle Obama, next time!

Copyright 2011 - Dexter Yarbrough

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    • Dexter Yarbrough profile image
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      Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States

      Hi Feenix! Well I am glad you enjoyed it and it got you to thinking about something else! Thanks my friend!

    • feenix profile image

      feenix 5 years ago

      Hey, Dex,

      Actually, I initially read this hub a couple of months ago but I failed to leave a comment.

      But I will comment now by letting you know that I really did enjoy reading this piece (so much, I read it twice)and it got me out of my head -- and inside my head is very dangerous territory. ;-)

    • Dexter Yarbrough profile image
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      Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States

      Ghost! I have missed you. I have been vacationing but shall return soon! Thanks for reading and the votes!

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      Ghost32 5 years ago

      Okay...wonder where they scattered the various body parts of Leroy when Michelle got done with him?

      Brilliant analyses of the various candidates, by the way. I couldn't agree more.

      Voted Up and All That.

    • Dexter Yarbrough profile image
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      Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States

      Hi Jim! Yes, you were. I think there is something going on with HP. Anyway, glad to have your wonderful comment back! Thanks again!

    • Dexter Yarbrough profile image
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      Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States

      Hi Fpherj48! Your comments are so wonderful! Even the sarcastic one! Ha ha ha!!! I am hugging you back! Have a fantastic Thanksgiving!!

    • TheManWithNoPants profile image

      TheManWithNoPants 5 years ago from Tucson, Az.

      Dexter,

      This is weird. I was the first one to comment on this hub, and the comment's gone! Anyway, great humor pointed in the right direction as always. I love this stuff! :)

      jim

    • fpherj48 profile image

      Paula 5 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York

      Geeeeeeeeezz, Dexter...I got dizzy scrolling down 2 miles of comments. I just wanted to say it's too bad your hubs are so unpopular and no one wants to read your work. I just don't know what to say to cheer you up. I keep returning to check on things, but looks like you'll have to try harder. Don't give up buddy, one day your Obama series will catch on. BTW...you think you've got problems...can you believe some people think I need to get a handle on my constant sarcastic attitude?? Some people are just plain rude....(I'm hugging you)

    • fpherj48 profile image

      Paula 5 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York

      Dexter...I can always count on you to bring laughter into my day....After a visit with Barack and Michele, I'm ready to tackle anything with a big smirk on my face. There are an awful lot of people around here who are definitely wondering WHAT THE HELL I'M UP TO!! lol

    • Dexter Yarbrough profile image
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      Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States

      Hi Rajan! It is an honor and pleasure to have you reading my series. I hope you have time to read them from the beginning. I try to make them entertaining and not very long.

      Thank you so much for your very kind words. Indeed, you have made my day brighter!

    • rajan jolly profile image

      Rajan Singh Jolly 5 years ago from From Mumbai, presently in Jalandhar,INDIA.

      Hi Dex, I thoroughly enjoyed this write up. This is the 1st one in this series which I read. Now I will read this stuff right from the start.

      You amaze me with your writing Dex.

      Voted up and awesome.

    • Dexter Yarbrough profile image
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      Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States

      Hi b. Malin! Thank you so much. I am glad you enjoyed it! And yes we could write as a team! I'm always looking for good material!

    • b. Malin profile image

      b. Malin 5 years ago

      Dexter I just finished reading this Satire that you wrote and am still Laughing. We think a like...I Love your Humor. Yes, Saturday Night could certainly use you to Freshen up their lack luster humor...Hey, maybe we could write as a team! Only Kidding??? Sure.

    • Dexter Yarbrough profile image
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      Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States

      Hi Jim! I am glad you enjoyed it! Thanks so much!

    • TheManWithNoPants profile image

      TheManWithNoPants 5 years ago from Tucson, Az.

      (laughing my ass off) Love it dude! I'll be catching up the next few days now that I got that comments problem fixed!

      jim

    • Dexter Yarbrough profile image
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      Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States

      Flora! I have been reading you for a while. You are a fine writer. It was just a minor slip. Happens to me all the time. :-)!

    • FloraBreenRobison profile image

      FloraBreenRobison 5 years ago

      that should be "there" were two African Americans running against each other. I know the difference between there they're and their, really I do. Just doesn't look like it. sigh.

    • Dexter Yarbrough profile image
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      Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States

      Hi Flora! Well, I am just happy that you are taking the time to read them. I try to write them so that those new to the series don't have to start at the beginning. But I do see some benefit to starting from the beginning, if you so choose.

      They are fictional and satirical based upon my own brand of humor. So, if I can get a chuckle or smile, I have served my purpose! Thank you!

    • FloraBreenRobison profile image

      FloraBreenRobison 5 years ago

      I need that chef who cooks them breakfast. It looks delicious. I'm a new follower of yours so I have a huge number of these to back read, but I follow the news, so I know who all these names are. There are quite a few African Americans who don't like Cain-mostly liberals, mind you, not a surprise. It would be interesting if Cain ended up being the final choice and their were two African Americans running against teach other. I saw Al Sharpton the other night on The Daily show. You know, I should probably be reading these from #1 onward instead of backwards...

    • Dexter Yarbrough profile image
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      Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States

      Hi LuxmiH! I am so glad you enjoyed this one in my series. I hope you will read some of the others! Thank you so much for the votes and for posting it on FB. I really appreciate it!

    • LuxmiH profile image

      Luxmih Eve-Lyn Forbes 5 years ago from Fort Pierce, Florida

      You are hilarious! Perhaps not politically correct and therefore as a forbidden fruit...even funnier.

      Herman Cain is one of my heroes for the exact reasons stated by 'Tyrone'.

      I voted up and funny. Also posted it on my face book.

    • Dexter Yarbrough profile image
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      Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States

      Hi Thelyricwriter! I am glad you enjoyed it. Thank you so much. I hope you find the others just as entertaining!

    • thelyricwriter profile image

      Richard Ricky Hale 5 years ago from West Virginia

      Dexter, this was comical. A great article indeed. Voted up. At this time, I needed a laugh. I will have to look into the others.

    • Dexter Yarbrough profile image
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      Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States

      Hi Vicki! Welcome. I am so glad you enjoyed this one in my series. Thanks you so much. I hope you enjoy the others as well. Please let me know. And thanks so much for the votes!!

    • Dexter Yarbrough profile image
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      Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States

      Hi Nurse Mar! I should have consulted you for ideas! I really appreciate your kindness and support! YOU are cool!

    • Dexter Yarbrough profile image
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      Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States

      Hi Epi! I am just happy to be a shadow within your great figure. Thank you so much. I really get a kick out of writing this series. My inspiration comes from people like you!

    • Dexter Yarbrough profile image
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      Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States

      Hi Sueswan! I am glad you enjoyed it! Up, up and away - hey, hey hey!! Thank you!

    • vicki goodwin profile image

      Sojourner McConnell 5 years ago from Winchester Kentucky

      This is hilarious. I am going to pass it along. I laughed while reading this and I plan on reading the entire series, now that I know it exists. I voted up and over as much as was allowed.

    • marcoujor profile image

      Maria Jordan 5 years ago from Jeffersonville PA

      Dex,

      Nurse Mar hurt herself so hard from laughing that she had to apply a Herman LIDO(Caine) patch but still managed to vote this UP & FAB. You are so cool, mar.

    • epigramman profile image

      epigramman 5 years ago

      ..well .... we all have something which makes us famous.

      I, the epi-man, have Dexter Yarbrough, in my corner, do you know that guy????? lol lol

      And you good sir have the world famous morning conversations of Barack and Michelle - I am so proud of you for this one and also so much fun to read - you say I'm da man but I beg to differ - you're da the man !!!!!

      lol lol

      lake erie time 9:10pm

    • profile image

      Sueswan 5 years ago

      Hi Dexter!

      Laughter is the best medicine and thanks to you I got mine.

      Voted up, up and away!

    • Dexter Yarbrough profile image
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      Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States

      Hi Satice! Thank you so much. I actually have a lot of fun writing these "conversations." Sometimes I worry if people find them humorous, but your response makes me feel good about it. Thanks again!

    • satice_j profile image

      satice_j 5 years ago from via the Bronx, NY

      Dexter, I have just rolled off my bed lmao at this convo between the Prez and Michelle! I loved it! You make them so real and approachable, as if we could be in the kitchen with them as opposed to being a fly on the wall peering in. You got it going on with this series! Don't stop! Voted you up and out of this world; all buttons pushed! Bravo!

      @Lady_E Ditto!

    • Dexter Yarbrough profile image
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      Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States

      Hi Sheila B.! Tyrone is very happy about this. However, he is loyal to the First family so he has to keep it hush, hush!! Thanks!

    • sheila b. profile image

      sheila b. 5 years ago

      I really like your Herman Sugar Cain. And I'm liking him, too. Tonight it's being reported Cain is first in the new polls. I wonder what Tyrone thinks about that?

    • Dexter Yarbrough profile image
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      Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States

      Hi Anjperez! Thank you. I am working on it!

    • Dexter Yarbrough profile image
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      Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States

      Hi Always Exploring! Thanks so much for reading! Tyrone is a fine cook. He can be a little introverted at times, but he is a kind man and great cook. Leroy is a different story!

    • Dexter Yarbrough profile image
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      Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States

      Hi Lady E! It is always a pleasure to get a visit from you! If you help me to turn this into a sitcom and get some actors, we can become partners and share in the income! How about it?

      Thanks for your nice comments!

    • Dexter Yarbrough profile image
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      Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States

      Hi Pop! Thanks for your wonderful comments and votes. Standup? Are you kidding? I would be laughed off a stage!

    • Dexter Yarbrough profile image
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      Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States

      Hi Sunnie! You are truly wonderful. Thanks so much. What really makes me happy is how much you and others enjoy this series. It really makes me happy!

      I am still trying to find the right venue and way to take this series to the next level. I am open to ideas! Thanks, again!

    • Dexter Yarbrough profile image
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      Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States

      Hi WillStarr! Thank you sir. I appreciate you hanging in here with me. Barack has to win a few!

    • Dexter Yarbrough profile image
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      Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States

      Thanks, Sunshine! Amen!

    • anjperez profile image

      anjperez 5 years ago

      very funny. i wanna see this in a sitcom..... (,")

    • always exploring profile image

      Ruby Jean Fuller 5 years ago from Southern Illinois

      I can't stop laughing. Leroy is a funny Dude and where can i find another cook like Tyrone. I want some truffes. Another fun episode Dexter...Loved it.

    • Lady_E profile image

      Elena 5 years ago from London, UK

      Ha ha... I love the way Obama says his words. Dexter, you have to turn this into a Sitcom. I'll go find you some actors and actresses.... and that would be "A" Listers...

      Thanks

    • breakfastpop profile image

      breakfastpop 5 years ago

      Okay, now you have outdone yourself. I'm thinking you should look into standup!!! Up and funny and oh so awesome.

    • profile image

      Sunnie Day 5 years ago

      Dexter...I love all of them but this one ...oh my goodness..I am still laughing..pointing..yelling to everyone in the house...COME HERE AND READ THIS!!!HHAHAHA...Dex I sure hope you are doing something with these...Like the NEW YORK TIMES...I can see a weekly article by Dexter Yarbrough...This was so funny ..I can not say enough..I am looking at Herman Cain myself..

      Love,

      Sunnie

    • WillStarr profile image

      WillStarr 5 years ago from Phoenix, Arizona

      This stuff is priceless, Dex! Up and very funny!

    • Sunshine625 profile image

      Linda Bilyeu 5 years ago from Orlando, FL

      Hey Dex...amen to your comment to fpherj! :)

    • Dexter Yarbrough profile image
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      Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States

      Hi Fpherj48! I am so glad you are enjoying the series! I just love a great laugh. Have cried enough in life. Thanks so much!

    • Dexter Yarbrough profile image
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      Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States

      Hi Mcbirdbks! I should have consulted you first. Now THAT is clever! Thanks so much!

    • Dexter Yarbrough profile image
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      Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States

      Hi Miss Olive! Your comments and support mean the world to me. Thanks so much!

    • fpherj48 profile image

      Paula 5 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York

      Dexter....You crack me up! I love these hubs of yours. I just saw Michele this morning on the TODAY show, talking to Al Roker....Thanks to you, when I see her now, I see YOUR Michele. You are F U N N Y !!!

    • mckbirdbks profile image

      mckbirdbks 5 years ago from Emerald Wells, Just off the crossroads,Texas

      You missed 'We've got Able", "You've got Cain"

      Another humorous read sir.

    • missolive profile image

      Marisa Hammond Olivares 5 years ago from Texas

      always lovin' the dialogues you create and yes, they do actually make me hungry as well. I need a chef! lol

      This continues to be an amazing series Dex - congratulations!

    • Dexter Yarbrough profile image
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      Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States

      Hi Faithful Daughter! Thanks so much. I did not see that episode of EM, but I will try and find it and see how I can incorporate it into their next argument - I mean discussion!

    • Faithful Daughter profile image

      Evi Lopez 5 years ago from Sunny Florida

      Ha, ha, ha! Barack and Michelle really got a bit on the nasty side on this one. Good one!

      I really like to hear their conversation of the lastest thing Michelle did by appearing in the "Extreme Makeover" show on ABC, which was aired last week. Did you see it?

    • Dexter Yarbrough profile image
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      Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States

      Hi iZeko! I thought of you when I came up with this breakfast idea! True! True! So I thank YOU!

    • Dexter Yarbrough profile image
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      Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States

      Hi Molometer! Thanks so much for checking out my series. I really believe you will enjoy them. Let me know what you think. And hey, I am happy to be following you!

      And thanks for the votes!

    • Dexter Yarbrough profile image
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      Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States

      Hi DR BJ! Leroy is the shy introverted type around big whigs and politicos! He has been friends with the First Lady for sometime, however! Maybe we will start him off in Chicago politics first! Hint Hint!

      Thanks, Dr BJ!

    • Dexter Yarbrough profile image
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      Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States

      AmericanView! I hear you! Yes, I hear you! I am glad you enjoyed it! Thanks so much!

    • Dexter Yarbrough profile image
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      Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States

      Hi LailaK! Thanks for visiting. I am glad you enjoyed this one. I hope you will check back and read the others. And thanks for the votes!

    • Dexter Yarbrough profile image
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      Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States

      Hi Rosemay! Thank you. That really is my aim here on HP. To bring laughter and joy to the lives of others. I am happy I met my goal with you!

    • Dexter Yarbrough profile image
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      Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States

      Hi MAKUSR! Thanks for reading. I am so happy you enjoyed the latest in my series!

    • iZeko profile image

      iZeko 5 years ago

      Brouillade de truffes with a pinch of Tyrone and Leroy = Hilarious breakfast!

    • molometer profile image

      molometer 5 years ago

      Hi Dexter I started reading this and knew I had to start from the beginning (started laughing immediately) of the series which I am now going to do.

      Brilliant hub voted up FIU

      I'll Be Back (Arnie)

    • drbj profile image

      drbj and sherry 5 years ago from south Florida

      That Leroy, he's the man, Dex. Maybe we could convince HIM to run for president. He's quick on the uptake. Whatcha think?

    • American View profile image

      American View 5 years ago from Plano, Texas

      Dex,

      These are great as usual. Keep them coming. These articles might be the only reason to keep Obama in the whitehouse

    • LailaK profile image

      LailaK 5 years ago from Atlanta, Georgia

      Hehehe...this is just too funny! Great style and looking forward to reading more from you! Voted up!

    • Rosemay50 profile image

      Rosemary Sadler 5 years ago from Hawkes Bay - NewZealand

      Your Morning Conversations with the Obamas always brightens my day. Thank you for the laugh

    • makusr profile image

      Manoj Kumar Srivastava 5 years ago from India

      Dex,

      Greetings from MAKUSR. I liked your lovely conversation with Mr President and The First Lady. It was humorous as well as satirical. You have a keen insight into the politics of your country. Well done!

      Lots of Love,

      MAKUSR

    • Dexter Yarbrough profile image
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      Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States

      Sunshine! You are something else! lol

    • Sunshine625 profile image

      Linda Bilyeu 5 years ago from Orlando, FL

      It's about time!! If I was going to the fundrasier tonight I could have given them a copy of the conversation BUT I don't have thousands of dollars for a ticket! I'll just tweet it :))

    • Dexter Yarbrough profile image
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      Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States

      Hi Dahoglund! Yes. The good times are rolling at the White House! They eat well there, huh? Thanks!

    • Dexter Yarbrough profile image
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      Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States

      Hi Sunshine! I am so glad you liked it. Seems as if Barack got one over on Michelle this time! Thanks!

    • dahoglund profile image

      Don A. Hoglund 5 years ago from Wisconsin Rapids

      Another good time at the white house.voted across except useful.

    • Sunshine625 profile image

      Linda Bilyeu 5 years ago from Orlando, FL

      LOL! Dexter your conversations just keep on getting better! They make me like the Obama's even more then I do. I'm still hoping Leroy hooks us up for lunch! Voted UP and across the board! Keep 'em comin' y'all! :)))