What is your definition of a perfectly suitable partner?
And what do you mean by, for instance "Appearance" Is good appearance suit or smart casual, colour co-ordination, a style that fits or costs? And how many "personalities" are there out there? Are one word answers any use here? Aggressive but calm and focussed, shy and retiring but kind and considerate. Suppose you also consider looks; the list is endless. List preferences in order and describe...
My advice for you will be don't search for a perfect partner. Search one and accept him or her. Your acceptance will make your partner perfect.
When it comes to relationships there is no "right" or "wrong", only "agree" or "disagree". Ultimately we are all looking for someone that "naturally agrees" with us on the major things in life.
The rest of it comes down to (personal preferences) - height, body type, sense of humor, common interests, passion/romance, chemistry, goals/dreams. As the cliche goes, "Beauty is in the eye of the beholder". No one can tell you what you should be attracted to.
"The one" is someone who will also see YOU as being "Their one" in return. Life is a personal journey! Your first priority is to know yourelf!Stick to your own values. Always use your mind when making decisions concerning matters of the heart. You are responsible for your own happiness! Each of us (chooses) our own friends, lovers, and spouse. Be wise and careful when making your choice.
If you have to "change" who you are (at your core) in order to be loved by a specific person then they are the wrong person (for you). This is also true vice versa.
Everyone wants to be loved and accepted for being their "authentic self". You don't demand or negotiate for love and affection. (These things are given freely). You can't manufacture chemistry. (It's either there or it's not).
Each of us is entitled to create our own "Must haves" and "Deal breaker" lists. Your "list" will be different from mine. No two are identical. Everyone has their own "value point" system for the traits on their list. Not all traits are equally important.
In my opinion there are at least 6 traits that must be present to have a happy relationship.
The 6 traits are in this order: Honesty, Trust, Loyalty, Love & Devotion, Intimacy, and Emotional Security. If one of these are missing I wouldn't stick around.
Take it from me starting off with intimacy and attempting to work backwards seldom works. http://hubpages.com/hub/therecipeforrel … phappiness
It's important to have the same values. Other than that, I think differences are interesting and inevitable. You just have to accept those and know that your "partner" is his/her own person first and foremost.
I am too old, too wise, and too experienced in life and in marriage and family, to even think, that a " perfect" mate exists.
To really make marriage last, ( married 30 years), you have to adjust to shortcomings and inperfections, and then, to thank your spouse for working around your own, and still holding you near and dear.
It is a team effort, not a pick and choose category.
I would rather say ideally than perfectly. I don't think there is a "perfectly" suited any one but ideal is more like it. For me the ideal partner is one who puts me first, unselfish not only to me but to others. By unselfish I don't mean selfless. I mean being thoughtful and kind to others.
My fiance' can be a little thoughtless at times but I see that he is understanding more of what life should be about. He has always been kind to me and that is one reason I decided to give the relationship a try but he is so hard on the world. He has never had a relationship that allows him to be fully responsible for anyone else so it is taking him a while to catch up. I now see parts of him that were once dormant.
My ideal partner must be willing to grow. Like I mentioned above, I don't think he has changed. I see it as growth. He still retains his own personality and principles but he now treat others with compassion.
Other traits I like in my partner are tenderness with just the right amount of machismo, and being very loving in terms of hugging, romping and kissing a lot. Oh, and he must be able to make me smile or laugh.
I do not know if there is such a thing as a 'perfectly suitable partner', but according to me, what matters is that the person should accept you for who you are and both the partners should look towards making equal effort in a relationship.
My definition of a perfectly suitable partner is different now that I'm older and have kids from that of when I was first married and had no kids or just one. After a couple of divorces you learn a few things too. A perfectly suitable partner is one who is able to do, or works at doing his/her part in a relationship... financially, emotionally, physically, spiritually, mentally etc. One who understands you, communicates at the same or similar level as you, and who is willing to work towards the same goals and dreams with you.
And yes apperance is important you need to like what you kiss, but love, kindness,humor and all of the other things afore-mentioned are more important, because we all get old and wither second by second.
Similar interests and goals are important because the more differences you have, the more likely you are to be in frequent conflict. Over time frequent and constant conflict can kill a relationship.
Someone who I my spiritually connected with, physically attracted to, and mentally stable enough to withstand. We have to share similar likes as well as dislikes, but still have our differences. We have to view life, spiritually, the same, i.e. God, Jesus, ect. We don't have to agree on everything about God or the bible, but be open enough with each other to share our beliefs. He must be able to be there for me when I am down and be some what romantic, because my helpless romantic side needs some attention too. He must be somewhat financially stable, so we don't struggle to eat or make do.
And he has to be able to make me laugh
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