How do you handle a "friend" who delights in contradicting your every thought an

Jump to Last Post 1-14 of 14 discussions (14 posts)
  1. Brett Winn profile image79
    Brett Winnposted 12 years ago

    How do you handle a "friend" who delights in contradicting your every thought and opinion?

  2. homesteadbound profile image81
    homesteadboundposted 12 years ago

    I would have to consider whether they really were my friend or not. I think it would be difficult to be friends with someone who you appear to have nothing in common with and who appears to want to control how you think and feel.

  3. Brett Winn profile image79
    Brett Winnposted 12 years ago

    it's more like this friend seems to want to both compete and contradict me in everything I do and say. I think you said a lot in your first sentence ... makes me sad, though.

  4. pjpitts profile image74
    pjpittsposted 12 years ago

    I agree with homesteadbound about the "friend" actually being a real friend or not.  This person sounds like someone who feels better about themselves by putting other people down, like a power trip. This type of thing has happened to me and it is draining and confusing, not to mention hurtful!  If this person is someone important you could ask them why they are acting that way or if something is bothering them and see if they will level with you, if they won't do that, then  I would consider putting some distance between myself and the "friend."  Good luck!!

  5. duffsmom profile image59
    duffsmomposted 12 years ago

    I would change them from being a friend to an acquaintance.  Someone like that is so hard to be around.  If you can't talk to them and get them to stop - and that is unlikely if that is who they are - I would spend less time with the person.

  6. alisha4u profile image38
    alisha4uposted 12 years ago

    Keep mum....wait for them to finish up contradiciting... Give a pleasant smile...
    Reply only when you have a strong point (in a group of friends)... and 'Sew their Mouth' !!

  7. MsDora profile image95
    MsDoraposted 12 years ago

    Find out the reason for your friend's behavior.  Need for control?  Looking for recognition?  Have inferiority complex?  Help him/her deal with the issue if he/she needs help?  Otherwise, change the relationship if it bothers you enough.

  8. JayDeck profile image59
    JayDeckposted 12 years ago

    You excise them from your circle of friends. You know, they could be asking the question, "What do you do with a friend that is always on the wrong side of every issue?"

  9. Mercia Collins profile image66
    Mercia Collinsposted 12 years ago

    It depends why they are doing it. Young males often do this. It could be immaturity, jealousy, mind games.

    However, do bear in mind that a true friend does not always agree with you. A true friend tells you in private when he or she believes that you are wrong about something and this is especially important when your friend believes that your thoughts or opinions could lead you into danger or harm.

    You should ask your friend why he or she feels the need to contradict you, privately, not in front of others.

    Friends do not always have exactly the same thoughts and opinions about every single thing and sometimes it is very important that they do not.

  10. feenix profile image57
    feenixposted 12 years ago

    If I had a "friend" who obviously "delights" in contradicting all of my thoughts and opinions, I would cease to have a friendship with that person.

    Every time his/her name would show up on my caller I.D., I would not answer the call, and I would avoid being at the same place at the same time he/she is there.

  11. Beege215e profile image58
    Beege215eposted 12 years ago

    I don't think I would want to "handle" a "friend" like this.  I cannot change the people around me. I can only "handle" myself.  And I would take my handle and walk away.  Should that person come back to me later I would quietly and as gently as possible tell them why I walked away.  And I would walk away again to give them time to consider my response. If they would then choose to come back to me again, I would give them a second chance (we all need them sometimes).
    And now comes the "but".  But should they violate my personal rules again, we are done.

  12. Beata Stasak profile image80
    Beata Stasakposted 12 years ago

    I have married him and now I am working on my verbal skills in myriad of discussions and negotiations every day...let just say I like to be is part of learning and growing...

  13. Peter Allison profile image81
    Peter Allisonposted 12 years ago

    Marry her/him? LOL That's what I did. The joy is in the dialog and in the journey.

  14. Silva Hayes profile image76
    Silva Hayesposted 12 years ago

    I would place some distance between myself and that "friend."  You probably can't change their behavior, and you should give some thought as to whether the friendship is benefitting you or damaging you.


This website uses cookies

As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at:

Show Details
HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the or domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)
ClickscoThis is a data management platform studying reader behavior (Privacy Policy)