On the idea of love, how is it that we have chose to give up?
Everywhere I look, there really is this idea of love, but it's a tired love. Looks like a hassle to most people now, after the age of teenage dreams, evolution takes hold and what else is there to have love for?
We talk about true love, but is there a real possibility of everlasting mutual love?
Of course, absolutely. Why not? I really cannot answer other than love is not defined by anything ..not age, color, race....so it can come at any time..and anywhere..only when one is not looking..
This hub offers a lifetime experiences, sacrifices and mistakes. I am happily married to a wonderful man. I wouldn't trade my life for anything! read more
Every year millions and possibly billions of people in the world get married. No one gets married thinking, "This is not going to last".
Like a lot of things humans attempt...We usually don't get it "right' the first time out the gate. Sometimes it's a matter of (not knowing ourselves) well enough before choosing a mate. (What we want or need...etc) Other times we evolve into different directions, no longer wanting the same things for the relationship or we grow apart. Teenagers may be emotionally high strung as they believe they are in love but they don't have the life experience to determine who they are themselves let alone what it will take to make a good spouse. Living under one's parent's roof with no stresses in life other than going to school is not "the real world".
When you get right down to it being single, dating, or married are life-style choices. Everyone has the option to open their hearts or close them. Life is a personal journey.
Love is a game, a game most people play with themselves, and end up losing to themselves. Everything that people say they want, isn't necessarily what they want. Whatever seems nice, convenient or is exercised by others, people pretend to want it because it looks, smells and seems nice. No thought is put into how the other individuals obtained it, if it is real, if it's the truth or if their even sincerely happy. Most of the time, it looks good from the angle they are viewing it from and so they want it. Love and being loved in each case is different. Who wouldn't want to be loved, adored, pampered, spoiled, share moments with the one they love that loves them too. Who doesn't want romance, passion, exclusiveness in addition to the thought of knowing you will be able to cherish this amazing experience if not person for the remainder of your life. and it will make it fabulous. Then reality kicks in because anothers love cannot and will never be yours. Wanting and desiring what another has will always "make you have second thoughts" . How about what does "love" mean to you? Find it instead of trying to mimmick it. You can't mimmick spending your entire life with someone you hate as well as don't know. You will appreciate it for what it is worth and only then will you hold on to what you possess, what is yours and yours to keep.
Love is not an unmovable force. It grows and adapts with us. Even if romance only exists for a short time, that does not dimish it's value. Love is love...
People can either grow together or apart. It is not something that is entirely in our control. Some will stay together not because they love each other but because it is now their comfort zone.
Love is not rated by time and it is not defined solely by romance and promises kept. It is about the people and how they feel. If you want to be "in love" forever, it is a possible, but not a realistic desire. It can happen, but expecting your lover to feel the same way for 60+ years is taking away from the moment you are in. Love today and see what tomorrow brings.
Your phrase "mutual love" is key here. Love has to be mutual. Both parties have to commit to each other for life, and swear never EVER to leave each other, NO MATTER WHAT. In order for "everlasting mutual love" to be possible at all, both people need to never to give up on the relationship. NOTHING can tear you apart. Your relationship cannot be easily broken, or else anything can and will tear you apart. You need to honor your marriage vows. They are not suggestions. They are vows that should last your entire life; literally, "til DEATH do you part." It's serious stuff, and it's the most important decision you will make in your life.
But lots of marriages fail nowadays. Why? Well, there's TONS or reasons why, and we cannot know all of them. But the key issue is that one or both parties have decided to give up on their marriage, and decide that they didn't really mean their marriage vows when they said them. The basic issue is: someone gave up. For whatever reason, they stopped fighting for their relationship.
So I think that, in order to find true, everlasting love, you have to be with someone who is willing to commit to being your "everlasting" partner in life, and who will never leave you or forsake you.
Now, I do think there are times when it is good & correct to leave a relationship or marriage. If the person is abusing you (or especially your children!) physically or sexually, then you need to get out of there until that person is willing to get help and change. You need to put your children first in this circumstance and protect them.
And I don't think that it's always wrong to get a divorce. I think it's undesirable, and unfortunate, but sometimes better for both parties involved.
Divorce sometimes enables people to gain back their lives, become whole again, and move on to better things. But divorce can scar children forever. Divorce can rip families apart and put people in dire financial straits.
Those who've been married for years can tell you that they decide everyday to put their spouse 1st and protect their marriage.
There is actual everlasting love that is mutual, though it's not necessarily perfect (as we're all humans who tend to human foibles.) I see love when I look for it, and I see hate when I look for it. Consider reading my hub about the 7 Laws of Attraction: http://faceless39.hubpages.com/hub/The- … Attraction
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