Not sure which women you mean because the women in my life don't settle for anything less than they deserve. There's nothing wrong with demanding the best i your life, to want all those things you wish for. There is nothing wrong with being selfish in any form. It means you are proud of who you are, have ambition and a dream you hold close, that you are smart enough to know that anything you want in this world can be achieved as long as you are brave and smart enough to demand it....not ask for it, demand it, take it, make it yours. Those who lower their standards, are settling. And those that settle, deserve the lives they live and shouldn't complain.
I am of the same opinion. I believe that I deserve the best in terms of relationships. I will never date a person who is not my educational and socioeconomic equal. I also want someone who is extremely cultured and used to the finer things.
No one knows every single thing about close friends and associates when ot comes to relationships you only know what they tell you
I believe there are some women who have decided they’d rather be with (any man) than be with no man. However when you look at that it is still (their choice) and therefore they are getting what (they) want. There are only two ways to experience joy and peace of mind in relationships, you either get what you want or you learn to be happy with what you have.
In other instances some of these women have come to the realization that their expectations were unrealistic or possibly they were having problems attracting the kinds of men they wanted. Sometimes it’s a reality to check to discover you many not have what others at a certain level want. It’s the old saying; “Don’t expect to sit next to the moon unless YOU are a star.”
Last but not least some people (limit their options). We live on a planet with 7 billion people on it and odds are there is someone for everyone. However it is a human tendency to (exclude) rather than (include) when it comes to finding love. If I say “the one” has to be of my own race that would eliminate 6 billion people without my ever meeting them!
If I go onto to say “the one” must have my same faith, live in my same country, state, town, my friends and family must like/approve of them....etc that eliminates billions of more people and that is before I get to height, weight, education, occupation and interests! Awhile back I wrote a hub dealing with this issue. http://dashingscorpio.hubpages.com/hub/ … venbillion
Yes, dashing, there are such women around. They clearly are quite uncomfortable with themselves. They feel that they are worthless and insignficant as individuals. They are so desperate for men that the more desirable ones avoid them!
well it's not so much as women have "lowered their standards" it's more of society has sort of pushed them into the direction of settling. Now a days a lot of the general male population does not put a relationship on the top list of priorities. A man's list looks more along the lines of job, home, car, money, family, and then relationship. Until they are individually secure a stable woman is an option not a priority. The time before looking for the one will be spent with women who also are individually focused on their career and financial security instead of finding a significant other. And since neither party is any hurry to walk down the aisle even if the man is no where near ideal the woman will often keep him around because she doesn't feel the need to go look for someone else just yet. However, that leaves the hopeless romantic women in a bit of a rut, because they feel the need to settle. They start to see that all of the eligible successful bachelors they have their eye on aren't ready to commit. Therefore they let this man go, and search for one who is ready to settle. Often times the man who is ready to settle, is either just as much as an optimistic romantic or has settled into the life he already has. This man may not seem like the cream of the crop, but he's probably the one that isn't going to go partying every night with other women not because he doesn't dream of it but because he doesn't have those connections or resources. That isn't his life style, but just because he lacks in one area doesn't mean he won't be the most generous and caring person you'll ever meet. So women aren't really lowering their standards they are just settling for something stable.
Excellent points! It's not settling when you find someone who wants what you want! A wealthy man, high powered career, fame, and a good looking guy won't be in a hurry to get married. He's got lots of "options"! A bus driver is likely ready to wed.
Some women are so desperate for approval (whether it be attention from men or just approval in general) until they don't care what they do to get it. Low self esteem plays a big role in all of this because if a woman does not feel good about herself then her behavior shows it.
Lots of women grew up around female figures that showed them in their actions that it is okay to be dressed inappropriately, carry themselves with no class or dignity.I believe that by being a classy woman, it offends lots of women and they label them as stuck up.
Some women's lives are really not what they want it to be so they perpetuate drama, trauma, doom and gloom to get attention and it winds up looking really bad.
Good question...most women are influenced to do so and don't even realize it. Then again scratch the last part, they actually realize it but often times believe it's too late because they don't have the heart to do what they should have done in the first place. Have patience for who has worth or remove themselves from the "situation" entirely. Then again if you really have "standards" they won't be lowered maybe compromised but not permanently lowered.
Hi Kandylena,
love your question....In my opinion...it is rare to have a man who treats you good, has a job, not alot of baggage and doesnt cheat.....Most women feel like they need a man in their life so they feel loved or are not lonely.....thus they settle and lower their standards to have a man who most of the time doesnt really treat them right and has other women...because he can.....
Can you explain 2 me how can it be possible for a woman 2 believe she will be loved and no longer lonely knowing that she has 2 "settle" and lower her standards...... man thats some serious psychology
Hey Vonda, some people need others to validate them...tell them they love them and it doesnt show in their actions....tell them they look good and know they are lying..some women need that and it goes back to childhood issues..like no dad figure
Ok that may B true,but unfortunately I can't buy it. Anyone doing that is just setting themselves up 4 more heartache & pain. I don't get it, what would U get out of that. I know alot of males &it's not nice ? they say about womenwho they can
by dashingscorpio 7 years ago
Is marrying someone you don't love the ultimate definition of settling?Recently a question was asked on HP: Is it more important for you to marry someone who loves you than to marry someone (you) love? A few folks stated they'd rather be with someone (who loves them) rather than they themselves...
by DIYweddingplanner 13 years ago
Let's say you're strongly convinced the love of your life has come and gone, but you don't want to be alone forever. Is it ever OK to settle for that reason?
by mtalbot2987 13 years ago
Is it naive to think that there is 'the one'?and I'm not talking about the matrix. It seems highly unlikely that in a world populated by 6 billion people that there is one perfect person out there, or is it? Does fate compel us to find our perfect partner or do we just settle with what's in front...
by dashingscorpio 10 years ago
Do you believe (most) men in their (20s) are looking to "settle down"? or "play the field"?I read numerous posts from women in their 20s who are very unhappy with men in their age group when it comes to dating & having a serious relationship/marriage mindset. I suspect...
by Latanya M Williams 5 years ago
Why do people settle instead of waiting for their true love?
by Josh Makaveli 10 years ago
Do we need to first settle down before getting married?what does settling down mean? is it financial settlement like having a permanent job or mental settlement i.e. one needs to be mature enough?
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