On a first date, what one attribute would rule out a second date?
What could your date do that would be a sure sign to you that their would be no point in continuing to pursue a relationship with that person?
When someone is impatient, that is a big no-no for me. Yes, people can learn patience, but it usually is at the cruel expense of someone else.
If the person I was out with showed disregard for their personal hygiene, I would definitely not consider a second date.
If he talks too much about himself, I would not want a second day. I've had too many folks in my life (including a mother) who LOVE to talk about themselves. I realized that I meant very little to them; I was just an ear. If he's not interested in listening to you on the first date, he won't listen on the second, third, and fourth dates.
There are countless things!
When it's all said done if you don't have a similar sense of humor and click when it comes to chemistry and establishing rapport it's unlikely there will be a second date. If first date wasn't "enjoyable" there's no need to go out again!
Everything else that rules out a second date has to do with a person's behavior or topic of discussion they insist upon having whether it's an interrogation style rapid fire questions they ask, spending too much time talking about their exes, not asking you any questions to get to know what your interests are, excessive drinking, cursing, lateness, not dressed appropriately for the outing, constantly checking cell phone...rude to waiter/waitress, giving a date unsolicited advice.
A first date should be all about seeing if you have any chemistry and trying to (have fun) as you get to know each other's "likes" and "favorites" when it comes to ways they like to pass their time.
As I said if anyone walks away from a first date feeling like they didn't have a "good time" they won't be in a hurry to have a "second date".
Once I was in dating era for myself at a mature age. There were times it was through encounters both introduced and spontaneous. And, there was a time I used a service for introductions.
The normal social amenities would occur. Then a quick turnoff for me was when I was qualified too quickly. Many times that was a lead in topic even well before casual & formal or short term & long term. In other words the initial conversation after the natural amenities may follow along:
Date: Do you work or are you retired?
Me: I work
In my view it was odd the next lead in question was not what or where regarding work, but it was "Do you have retirement?"
Then I would usually pickup the menu wondering how to end the date.
Negativity would do it for me. Anyone who constantly criticizes or complains is a real turn off.
Sha..I'm with you GF! The first "Woe is me," and I'm outta there! LOL.The very WORST is men who speak disrespectfully about their EX!! Actually, even mentioning an ex is BIG red flag! I feel a headache comin on. ZZZZzzzzzzzzz.
Now here's a real no second...or first date. Anna just popped up next door on the screen here and wants to talk to me. She looks Russian and says hi! are u there?
If I'm ever in that situation again, I would be uninterested in a second date with a person who can't be bothered with calling me by name. You don't have to use my name in every sentence, but I will lose interest in a woman who thinks and speaks of me only in terms of "he" and "you."
Manners, manners, manners (lack thereof). Turning up wearing dirty clothes. Unkempt appearance. Assuming there is going to be a second date within five minutes of meeting me. And yes, all of this has happened and no, no second dates for them!
Sherry......Really?? You only want ONE? Sure, go ahead, spoil my fun.
At my age, with the years of experience I have been BLESSED with (?)....I have a list that.......OH My, do I have a LIST!
Frankly, it probably wouldn't be worth my time or Mr. X's time to even go out on a date. Poor guy would probably hit 10 strike outs within the first hour!
Well, if you insist, I'll follow the instructions. The sure way to rule out a second date for me would DEFINITELY be if he drank a lot! It would "Good-Night and Good-Bye."
I would love to hear the rest of yout list, as my experience is limited. It might be educational to know how he is drunk. I would never get serious with anyone if I had not seen him angry.
Sherry...My list would take a HUB, maybe a series!LOL- By the time you get to be a greatgrandma & had more than 1 husband & been on HUNDREDS of dates..That "LIST" is in SCROLL Form! Few warm fuzzies & lots of cold pricklies!
A red flag if a man stabs at his salad on your first dinner date, ladies.
Really? I would not have thought twice about that.
Sherry, Pay no attention to our sweet Alastar. I believe he is simply being funny. C'mon Alastar, how else can we eat salad? I'd say it's a red flag if he used a spoon!! LOL
Watch a guy stab at his salad and you'll see what i mean.
LOL Alastar...MOST guys won't even eat SALAD. It must be too "feminine" for the tough guys!! But, you're right, they DO stab at their food if they can't eat it with their hands!! LMAO! Gotta love 'em!
A date who does not pay attention to conversations is a turn-off for me.
by Steven Escareno7 years ago
seriously, i'd like to know, as i never made it past the first date. lol. therefore, what would be your idea of the perfect SECOND date after you successfully made a good impression on the first one.
by Dr Pradip Hira5 years ago
What do you do if your first date that didn't go too well?
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