jump to last post 1-12 of 12 discussions (25 posts)

On a first date, what one attribute would rule out a second date?

  1. Sherry Hewins profile image98
    Sherry Hewinsposted 2 years ago

    On a first date, what one attribute would rule out a second date?

    What could your date do that would be a sure sign to you that their would be no point in continuing to pursue a relationship with that person?

  2. ThoughtsWriter profile image75
    ThoughtsWriterposted 2 years ago

    When someone is impatient, that is a big no-no for me. Yes, people can learn patience, but it usually is at the cruel expense of someone else.

    1. Sherry Hewins profile image98
      Sherry Hewinsposted 2 years agoin reply to this

      I think everyone loses patience sometimes, but it would not make a good first impression.

  3. DWDavisRSL profile image81
    DWDavisRSLposted 2 years ago

    If the person I was out with showed disregard for their personal hygiene, I would definitely not consider a second date.

    1. Sherry Hewins profile image98
      Sherry Hewinsposted 2 years agoin reply to this

      That would be a real turn off.

  4. letstalkabouteduc profile image100
    letstalkabouteducposted 2 years ago

    If he talks too much about himself, I would not want a second day. I've had too many folks in my life (including a mother) who LOVE to talk about themselves. I realized that I meant very little to them; I was just an ear. If he's not interested in listening to you on the first date, he won't listen on the second, third, and fourth dates.

    1. Sherry Hewins profile image98
      Sherry Hewinsposted 2 years agoin reply to this

      You make a very good point. It would be hard to feel a connection with someone  who is not interested in what you have to say.

  5. dashingscorpio profile image88
    dashingscorpioposted 2 years ago

    https://usercontent1.hubstatic.com/12678376_f260.jpg

    There are countless things!
    When it's all said done if you don't have a similar sense of humor and click when it comes to chemistry and establishing rapport it's unlikely there will be a second date. If first date wasn't "enjoyable" there's no need to go out again!
    Everything else that rules out a second date has to do with a person's behavior or topic of discussion they insist upon having whether it's an interrogation style rapid fire questions they ask, spending too much time talking about their exes, not asking you any questions to get to know what your interests are, excessive drinking, cursing, lateness, not dressed appropriately for the outing, constantly checking cell phone...rude to waiter/waitress, giving a date unsolicited advice.
    A first date should be all about seeing if you have any chemistry and trying to (have fun) as you get to know each other's "likes" and "favorites" when it comes to ways they like to pass their time.
    As I said if anyone walks away from a first date feeling like they didn't have a "good time" they won't be in a hurry to have a "second date".

    1. Sherry Hewins profile image98
      Sherry Hewinsposted 2 years agoin reply to this

      Chemistry is important. I think you can tell about that in the first few minutes.

  6. tsmog profile image82
    tsmogposted 2 years ago

    Once I was in dating era for myself at a mature age. There were times it was through encounters both introduced and spontaneous. And, there was a time I used a service for introductions.

    The normal social amenities would occur. Then a quick turnoff for me was when I was qualified too quickly. Many times that was a lead in topic even well before casual & formal or short term & long term. In other words the initial conversation after the natural amenities may follow along:

    Date: Do you work or are you retired?

    Me: I work

    In my view it was odd the next lead in question was not what or where regarding work, but it was "Do you have retirement?"

    Then I would usually pickup the menu wondering how to end the date.

  7. bravewarrior profile image94
    bravewarriorposted 2 years ago

    Negativity would do it for me. Anyone who constantly criticizes or complains is a real turn off.

    1. fpherj48 profile image75
      fpherj48posted 2 years agoin reply to this

      Sha..I'm with you GF! The first "Woe is me," and I'm outta there!  LOL.The very WORST is men who speak disrespectfully about their EX!!  Actually, even mentioning an ex is BIG red flag!  I feel a headache comin on.  ZZZZzzzzzzzzz.

    2. Alastar Packer profile image86
      Alastar Packerposted 2 years agoin reply to this

      Now here's a real no second...or first date. Anna just popped up next door on the screen here and wants to talk to me. She looks Russian and says hi! are u there?

  8. profile image85
    Mills Pposted 2 years ago

    If I'm ever in that situation again, I would be uninterested in a second date with a person who can't be bothered with calling me by name. You don't have to use my name in every sentence, but I will lose interest in a woman who thinks and speaks of me only in terms of "he" and "you."

  9. Lizam1 profile image83
    Lizam1posted 2 years ago

    Manners, manners, manners (lack thereof).  Turning up wearing dirty clothes.  Unkempt appearance. Assuming there is going to be a second date within five minutes of meeting me.  And yes, all of this has happened and no, no second dates for them!

    1. Lizam1 profile image83
      Lizam1posted 2 years agoin reply to this

      Oh and I just remembered another one - during our first date walk and talk he didn't ask me one question - just kept talking, talking, talking about himself!

  10. fpherj48 profile image75
    fpherj48posted 2 years ago

    Sherry......Really??  You only want ONE?  Sure, go ahead, spoil my fun.
    At my age, with the years of experience I have been BLESSED with (?)....I have a list that.......OH My, do I have a LIST! 

    Frankly, it probably wouldn't be worth my time or Mr. X's time to even go out on a date.  Poor guy would probably hit 10 strike outs within the first hour!

    Well, if you insist, I'll follow the instructions.  The sure way to rule out a second date for me would DEFINITELY be if he drank a lot!   It would "Good-Night and Good-Bye."

    1. Sherry Hewins profile image98
      Sherry Hewinsposted 2 years agoin reply to this

      I would love to hear the rest of yout list, as my experience is limited. It might be educational to know how he is drunk. I would never get serious with anyone if I had not seen him angry.

    2. fpherj48 profile image75
      fpherj48posted 2 years agoin reply to this

      Sherry...My list would take a HUB, maybe a series!LOL- By the time you get to be a greatgrandma & had more than 1 husband & been on HUNDREDS of dates..That "LIST" is in SCROLL Form!  Few warm fuzzies & lots of cold pricklies!

  11. Alastar Packer profile image86
    Alastar Packerposted 2 years ago

    A red flag if a man stabs at his salad on your first dinner date, ladies.

    1. Sherry Hewins profile image98
      Sherry Hewinsposted 2 years agoin reply to this

      Really? I would not have thought twice about that.

    2. fpherj48 profile image75
      fpherj48posted 2 years agoin reply to this

      Sherry,  Pay no attention to our sweet Alastar.  I believe he is simply being funny.  C'mon Alastar, how else can we eat salad?  I'd say it's a red flag if he used a spoon!!   LOL

    3. Alastar Packer profile image86
      Alastar Packerposted 2 years agoin reply to this

      Watch a guy stab at his salad and you'll see what i mean.

    4. fpherj48 profile image75
      fpherj48posted 2 years agoin reply to this

      LOL Alastar...MOST guys won't even eat SALAD.  It must be too "feminine" for the tough guys!!    But, you're right, they DO stab at their food if they can't eat it with their hands!!   LMAO!  Gotta love 'em!

  12. DDE profile image27
    DDEposted 2 years ago

    A date who does not pay attention to conversations is a turn-off for me.

 
working