If you're not gay, why do you spend so much time in the gay forums?

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  1. Theresa_Kennedy profile image78
    Theresa_Kennedyposted 12 years ago

    This question is for the anti-gay folk who spend an enormous amount of energy in various gay groups and forums. Why?

    Is it because you want to make sure everyone knows you are not gay? What are you SO afraid of if you stop preaching your anti-gay beliefs?

    GLBT forums are supposed to be for GLBT people and their allies, along with those who are genuinely curious. It's supposed to be a place for sharing, learning, support and resources. It really isn't the right place for haters.

    1. profile image0
      Stevennix2001posted 12 years agoin reply to this

      I think some people aren't secure enough in their own sexualities, so they often feel threatened by the very idea of any type of homosexual lifestyle.   Personally, my thoughts are if you're secure enough in your own sexuality, then who cares if the person is gay.  As long as they respect and acknowledge my right to straight, then I have no problems respecting their right to be gay or bisexual.  If they can't even respect that about me, then that's where we'll have problems.  lol

    2. Camille Harris profile image89
      Camille Harrisposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      I believe it's related to the [perceived] cloak of anonymity provided by the internet.  I sometimes scroll to the comments of major news articles just to see how quickly they degenerate to hate speech. 

      People who aren't gay and hang out in gay forums may be allies of the cause, or are more than likely folks who know their views are unpopular and wouldn't dream of discussing them amongst the general public, lest they be viewed as bigoted.

    3. profile image53
      PastorEdposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      The truth is (like it or not) God condemns gays.  I am more than willing to help anyone over-come this sin.  <snipped link>

      1. psycheskinner profile image81
        psycheskinnerposted 11 years agoin reply to this

        Anyone who thinks they can speak for god has a serious mental illness.

        1. Cagsil profile image72
          Cagsilposted 11 years agoin reply to this


        2. lobobrandon profile image87
          lobobrandonposted 11 years agoin reply to this

          Thumbs up

        3. A Thousand Words profile image67
          A Thousand Wordsposted 11 years agoin reply to this


      2. calpol25 profile image58
        calpol25posted 11 years agoin reply to this

        Well in your eyes I may have commited a sin, but if you know your bible you will know that " Only he who is wihout sin can cast the first stone"
        And without being mean Are you saying that you are without sin?

      3. calpol25 profile image58
        calpol25posted 11 years agoin reply to this

        Plus whilst were on the subject, can you answer me this question too please pastor coz its always fascinated me? In the bible it says were all created in gods image, then what god would persecute his own creation?  Would love to know........... smile  Also pastor one of the commandments states thou shalt not covet thy neighbours wife, nor his ox, nor his man servant. Now I thought religion would be against slavery but seemingly its ok to have a man servant too, please could you explain that one too? many thanks.....

      4. wordscribe43 profile image91
        wordscribe43posted 11 years agoin reply to this

        Are you kidding me?  Seriously?  This is the kind of attitude I abhor.  It's time to educate yourself.  A sin?  Please...  The only people who need "curing" or "help" are ones with this sort of judgmental, close-minded and highly unloving attitude.

        Please educate yourself.  While you're at it, why not attempt to "heal' yourself from heterosexuality.  Let me know how the experiment goes.  And answer Calpol's questions, too.  I know I'm waiting for your ever so enlightened answer.  roll

        You are VERY far from knowing the truth.

        1. calpol25 profile image58
          calpol25posted 11 years agoin reply to this

          I cant wait to find out the answers to these, and would love to see the healing process for heterosexuality too, that way you can kick open the closet doors and leave Narnia forever and be proud that you left the closet behind smile lol

          1. wordscribe43 profile image91
            wordscribe43posted 11 years agoin reply to this

            lol  I have a feeling the answers are NOT forthcoming, calpol!  Just a sneaking suspicion.

            1. calpol25 profile image58
              calpol25posted 11 years agoin reply to this

              I agree, funny how they post feeling really brave yet can not answer or will not answer because they know that they are deep down inside very wrong.. lol

              1. wordscribe43 profile image91
                wordscribe43posted 11 years agoin reply to this

                Exactly, you know that feeling of bravery when it comes to anonymity and all.  In this case, I think the offense was even worse.  Apparently, he was a spammer, to boot.  Brother...

                1. calpol25 profile image58
                  calpol25posted 11 years agoin reply to this

                  lol and we booted him smile

  2. Cagsil profile image72
    Cagsilposted 12 years ago

    And public forums are for everyone, not just specific people. wink

    When you have a forum that is public enabled, then you will have different people voicing different thoughts, either opinions, beliefs, facts or truth.

    Those who are against gays/lesbians, are in it for themselves more than anything else. Not one of the can come up with a rationalized explanation of their own actions, because they cannot see beyond themselves to begin with.

    So, they come to whatever forums and spout off, as if they have inside knowledge to some sort of truth, but in reality it's purely ego driven for why they post. lol

    1. Theresa_Kennedy profile image78
      Theresa_Kennedyposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      Cagsil, good points smile

      I know I sound like I want exclusive groups but this isn't about those who want to ask questions and post their thoughts on any given topic. I'm directing this more toward those who spend excessive amounts of time in gay forums when they're anti-gay.

      Personally I think it's a fear thing.

      1. Cagsil profile image72
        Cagsilposted 12 years agoin reply to this

        My statement wasn't meant for you. It was just directly addressing the usage of public forums.

        Fear? Maybe of themselves, but not of other people. It would be a misunderstanding on their part, of themselves.

        Having gay people around and as friends, then there is nothing to fear. Being gay? Or being lesbian, isn't something to fear to begin with. It's actually meaningless in the overall perspective and that is what many people fail to realize.

        What is meaningless is the fact that a person's sexual orientation is such a minor portion of what an individual actually is. wink

      2. wilderness profile image93
        wildernessposted 12 years agoin reply to this

        No, I do not think it is fear.  Oh sure, there are a few people that fear anyone different or any change they might be forced into, they are relatively rare.  Neither are those that fear their own homosexual tendencies common.

        Rather it is the hatred and bigotry of the religious fundie that produces most of the screaming and vitriol in these forums.  Those two things, hatred and bigotry, are coupled with the deep conviction that they and they alone understand the Truth of Gods Will and are therefore are required to protect the world from the evil people that don't.

        That the requirement to stamp out evil fits perfectly with their own bigotry and hatred of anyone different adds fuel to the fire.  After all, it is only the different people that are evil; if they lived the same life of the fundie they could be neither different nor evil by definition.

        1. Hollie Thomas profile image59
          Hollie Thomasposted 11 years agoin reply to this


          1. calpol25 profile image58
            calpol25posted 11 years agoin reply to this

            Agreed smile

            1. Hollie Thomas profile image59
              Hollie Thomasposted 11 years agoin reply to this

              I'm not gay, but my son is. I'm interested to know the homophobic mind operates.

              1. wordscribe43 profile image91
                wordscribe43posted 11 years agoin reply to this

                Same, about how the homophobic mind works.  I have quite a few gay friends, so homophobic people really piss me off.  I've heard some horrific stories from my gay friends.  I guess I want to support the gay community, to let them know there are many of us who do fully accept them and will support them the best we can.

                1. Hollie Thomas profile image59
                  Hollie Thomasposted 11 years agoin reply to this

                  Absolutely, but you know what really makes me laugh? When challenged, a homophobe will refer to the bible, even those who I've met that have only attended a church for a baptism or wedding. Talk about scratching for sources. lol

                  1. livelonger profile image87
                    livelongerposted 11 years agoin reply to this

                    I *just* wrote a Hub on why they really shouldn't bother, unless they're trying to undermine their case. wink

                  2. wordscribe43 profile image91
                    wordscribe43posted 11 years agoin reply to this

                    Don't even get me started on that...!  The other constituent is uneducated people.  There really are still people who think most of them are HIV+ and will become infected in their very presence.  roll  I know that adds to their hysteria and fear.  They're xenophobes, really... uneducated ones are the worst kind, too.

                2. calpol25 profile image58
                  calpol25posted 11 years agoin reply to this

                  Thank you wordscribe43, hollie and livelonger, I am gay and I know there alot of accepting people out there who do support us  and always nice to meet them. Best laugh ever when they retort to the bible because all you have to ask is who wrote it? and when they say god its soooo funny because if he did the im sure he would have given up on looking for a publisher early on lol! lol lol

              2. calpol25 profile image58
                calpol25posted 11 years agoin reply to this

                Simple answer to that one hun is that the homophobic mind operates only with hatred, be it of themselves because they are gay and cant come out, or that a lack of education and awareness means they dont understand that not all people are like them... smile

                1. Hollie Thomas profile image59
                  Hollie Thomasposted 11 years agoin reply to this

                  Eventually, Calpol, they'll get there.

                  1. calpol25 profile image58
                    calpol25posted 11 years agoin reply to this

                    We can only hope smile

  3. profile image0
    Sherlock221bposted 12 years ago

    I agree that public forums are for everyone to add their point of view to, no matter how bigoted and unreasonable or liberal and understanding.  Recent forums, where the gay issue has been the topic of discussion have thankfully shown that most people are not homophobic, even amongst the religious.  It is usually the same names which repeatedly share their intolerant views, and it would be unexpected if they didn't add their two penn'orth to the debate.  It also makes the discussion more interesting, when not everyone is agreeing, and a polite argument can sometimes be very thought-provoking.

  4. Lisa HW profile image61
    Lisa HWposted 12 years ago

    I'm not someone who spends much time in this particular forum.  Once in awhile if I see a thread that catches my eye, and that makes me think I might have something to offer (or that it's interesting) I'll pop on here. 

    Personally, I think people who have "axes to grind" over the Gay/Lesbian "issue" don't belong in this forum.  Yes, it's a public forum; but I think this way:  If there were a forum for, say, women only or empty-nesters only, I'd think it was for whoever the forum was supposed to be "for".  If it were a men's forum or an Asian forum, I'd most likely stay out most of the time.  (I seldom go to the cooking or sports forums either.)

    Really, though, to me, it's one thing if someone spots a subject he thinks might be interesting; but I don't think it's appropriate for someone to go to "whatever" forum and start bashing or insulting or otherwise being objectionable to the very people to whom it's supposed to be primarily aimed.  I mean, if people want/need to bash other people (or their causes, nature, lifestyles, whatever), I think they could at least go make their objectionable remarks in the Hubbers' Hangout (like so many other people do  lol ).  (I made the little joke there, but I'm serious.  Public or not, it's just not the place for that kind of behavior.)

  5. profile image0
    janikonposted 12 years ago

    it's to make sure we are aware of their displeasure or disgust with our lifestyle, while also proving to all of us how much information they've sponged from the anti-gay propaganda of the seventies and eighties.

    ... you know, for funsies

  6. Maureen Langford profile image57
    Maureen Langfordposted 12 years ago

    Maybe they are of the mind set of "Know thy enemy".  I don't know.  Maybe they are trying to confront some inner turmoil.
    I have a question though -how do you know they are coming in if they don't leave a thought?

    1. Cagsil profile image72
      Cagsilposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      If they are using that mind set against gays and/or lesbians, then it only proves my point about the level of ignorance in the world today, considering that point of view is about self more so, than it is about other people. lol lol

  7. KK Trainor profile image59
    KK Trainorposted 12 years ago

    I don't know because I read lots of forums on many topics, but it may be for the same reason Cagsil and Sherlock, among others, spend so much time and energy refuting religion on forums about Christianity. Their many offensive and condescending posts about the foolishness of us 'believers' could definitely be compared to those posted against gays, but we just keep believing anyway. Just like gay people can just keep on being who they are. Fortunately hate can't keep us from being who we are.

    1. Cagsil profile image72
      Cagsilposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      Be careful about speaking about things which you know nothing about. Don't for one second assume you know 'why' I post in religious threads.

      It certain wouldn't be the same reasoning, as those who post in gay/lesbian threads.
      You're good little followers, who have fooled themselves with foolishness, so they can feel better about themselves. But, it's a different story completely with regards to gays and lesbians.
      Hate? can't keep us from being who we are? You're joking, right? You are who you choose to be.

    2. profile image0
      Sherlock221bposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      I fail to see how refuting religion can be at all offensive.  Are you saying that everyone has to agree with your particular religious view?  I am an atheist and therefore do not believe in God, I'm sorry if you find this offensive.  However, I happen to have an interest in religion, once being a Christian myself, and even once as a teenager believed I had a calling to becoming a monk.  I have since been a Jehovah's Witness, a Quaker and a Spiritualist.  In addition, I studied "World Religions" at degree level, so I feel I am perfectly entitled to have my views on religion.  I can't help it if you find atheists offensive.

      The difference is that I do not state any hatred against any religion or religious believer.  I may strongly disagree with their beliefs, and in a democracy I am allowed to.  Never though would I make a statement such as 'I hate Christians, and believe they are evil and deserve punishment in the eternal fires of hell.'  You know, the kind of thing homophobic types say to gay people or Muslims, or just about anyone who is different to themselves.  If you cannot cope with the fact that not everyone in the world is a Christian and does not share your view of the world, then that is a problem for you to come-to-terms with. 

      The fact that I have many friends who would descrbe themselves as religious would suggest I don't have a problem with them.  How many of the homophobes on here though would have friendships with gay people?  None, I guess would be the answer.   And whilst I strongly disagree with the homophobic hatred that I have read on here, I still believe those who have written such things have a right to their views.  So please accept that I have a right to my atheism.

      1. My Minds Eye53 profile image60
        My Minds Eye53posted 12 years agoin reply to this

        yes you have a right to be wrong.  Sorry couldn't pass that up.  Seriously, I would rather know a moral atheist than a bad christian.  A higher power will make the decision as to which is right.  I believe in God as I stated in another hub, and in doing so I also believe I don't have the right to stand in judgement of anyone but myself.  I know a lot of gays, if you are seeing only the gay side, then you are missing a lot.  None of us are one sided.  I for one do not want to throw the first stone.  It might come back to hit me.

  8. thaivalentine profile image60
    thaivalentineposted 12 years ago

    The title of this post actually made me laugh as that is a good question.

  9. brimancandy profile image79
    brimancandyposted 12 years ago

    I would welcome the non gays to the forum. Not all of them are here just to spout off their non-gay views. Some might know someone who is gay, maybe a family member, or a friend, and might find useful information. The problem with most straight gay-fearing individuals is that they can't get past the idea that being gay is just about sex. But, there are so many variations in the gay world, that even some gay people don't know it all. It's like an ever expanding universe, where there might be something new around the corner. Like 10 years ago, I didn't know there was such a thing as a gay "Otter." now I know. I think I might be one.

  10. whoisbid profile image60
    whoisbidposted 11 years ago

    A lot of anti gay people want to have more sex but they deny it. Since they are living in denial, it is very easy for them to bash others to make themselves feel better

    1. calpol25 profile image58
      calpol25posted 11 years agoin reply to this

      That is so true whoisbid smile


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