I wanted to confront the other woman of my partner.

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   bluegreengirlposted 12 years ago

   How can I ask her to stop communicating? I want to ask her in a calm and nice way. Can you help me and guide on how to do it? Thanks!

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      Greek Oneposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      If your partner is cheating on you, then speak to your partner.
      
      Even if you get rid of her, unless it is him doing the ridding, then he will just find himself someone else

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         bluegreengirlposted 12 years agoin reply to this

         i already talked to my partner and were now on the process of working out.. but the other woman, keeps on calling and sending PM's to my partner.. it didn't bother me at first but now.. it's annoying me. My partner and i are working out with our issues and there she was calling and still communicating. I want to get rid of her, asking her nicely that i won't be look like desperate, arrogant, or angry.

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            Greek Oneposted 12 years agoin reply to this

            what's wrong with being angry and arrogant?
            I would be in this situation

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      SoleiMarieposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      You can actually ask her a decent meeting maybe in a nearby place for you to talk about your issues. Tell her of what you want her to do and give her valid reasons why she should stop communicating your partner.
      
      If she is selfish and closed minded and still didn't stop communicating, you may ask your partner to meet with her and he should be the one to tell the other girl while you are there. If your partner could do that then you are sure that he will be choosing you over her.

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         bluegreengirlposted 12 years agoin reply to this

         Thanks SoleiMarie- Now I'm having second thoughts.. maybe i'll call her instead.. I can't imagine talking to her in person. whatdyouthink?

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      sholland10posted 12 years agoin reply to this

      If your partner is serious about working it out then your partner should be the one to tell her to stop calling.  I hate to tell you, but your partner may be the problem here.  I hope it works out for you.

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      janikonposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      I would suggest discussing it with your partner and not going to the woman, it could end horribly.

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      raciniwaposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      Well, if your partner is cheating on you then the real issue here is not but of him not being to really know what does he really want in a relationship. Partners who were victims of infidelity thought they're to blame, but the real story behind this is the erring partner really has not found the right person for him/her...he is still seeking and is not able to find the answer...but it's best to let the partner know for he/she is at fault here, not the other woman...

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      Cagsilposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      Controlling much?
      And, why do you find it your place?
      I just did.

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   bluegreengirlposted 12 years ago

   i want to ask her calm and nicely to stop communicating.. i dont wanna fight with the girl i dont want to pud down my level on her.

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      thighhighchickposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      If they are communicating knowing it upsets you than she must not feel the same as you do. If my Gf was talking to someone that she knew upset me after discussing it I would put my foot down and ask her to chose.

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         bluegreengirlposted 12 years agoin reply to this

         My partner chose me, but the communication is still there.. they told me they're just friends now.

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            Hollie Thomasposted 12 years agoin reply to this

            If your partner has maintained a 'friendship' with this woman this may be encouraging her. He maybe the one who is sending her mixed signals.

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   wildernessposted 12 years ago

   She already knows that you want her to back off.  She isn't doing it.  Your asking her to do so will not change anything at all and there is thus no reason to speak to her.
   
   Your partner is the only one that can end it.

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      bluegreengirlposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      I agree with you.. so i must believe with my partner on what he says, i'm trying to bring back the trust but i just can't do that easily.

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      IntimatEvolutionposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      Precisely.  Talk to him.  He apparently wants her to call and stuff.  Or he'd change his number, swap phones with you for awhile to avoid her...  Have you considered sharing him or inviting her in as just a sexual partner.  He is needing something you are not providing him.  This is something you have no control over and it is his doing not yours.  If you can't share him or help him to fulfill his lustful needs, you may have to move on.

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   classicalgeekposted 12 years ago

   From my personal experience: don't do it. Really. There's no point and in the end you will feel worse and others will lower their opinion of you. Keep out of the mud.

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      bluegreengirlposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      Thanks! Woah! You've experienced this? How do you cope up with it? How  did you get rid of the girl? Share me tips! I would love to hear it from you.

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         classicalgeekposted 12 years agoin reply to this

         I didn't get rid of the girl. I got rid of the partner. Good thing, too, because they ended up using my identity fraudulently while I was overseas. Just imagine what would have happened to me if I had stayed with him! Ugh!

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            IntimatEvolutionposted 12 years agoin reply to this

            They stole your identity?  Oh heck no!  Call the cops, press charges against that person and if you cannot see the need to get rid of this person.  Go look in the mirror.  You deserve far better than that!

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   KCC Big Countryposted 12 years ago

   I agree with sholland10.....the partner will have to be the one to put a stop to it.  Perhaps it's time to change phone numbers? 
   
   I would think it would be difficult to maintain a friendship with her while trying to rebuild trust with you.  I'm not saying it can't be done, but it sure makes it hard on everyone.  One would have to wonder if it would really be worth it.

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   Rastamermaidposted 12 years ago

   He has to put a stop to it,also that we're just friends now things doesn't fly,they were heading for something more and if she's still calling she still wants it.
   
   I think you should get you a "friend" and see how he feels.

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      HattieMattieMaeposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      That's the thing most people disrespect your relationship, and if they want something they can't have they go in for the kill. I've seen many men & women do this, and there is no easy way to deal with it. You just have to stand your ground and let both of them no you mean business. If they don't want to deal with the boundaries, and respect you than maybe that means there is someone better for you!

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   melodytsposted 12 years ago

   I guess, changing number is one way so that the girl can't communicate with your partner (that if, it is easy to do with you). Or let your partner talk to her together with you so that she will realize that she's not the woman that your partner love and wanted to be with the rest of his life.

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