jump to last post 1-25 of 25 discussions (25 posts)

Is Having Two Wives Adulterous?

  1. ngureco profile image82
    ngurecoposted 8 years ago

    Is Having Two Wives Adulterous?

  2. surfgatinho profile image82
    surfgatinhoposted 8 years ago

    Technically no, looking at most definitions adultery has to me extra-marital

  3. Hilly Chism profile image75
    Hilly Chismposted 8 years ago

    I think it depends where you live. I wouldn't want two husbands.Have you got two wives?

  4. jak2009 profile image58
    jak2009posted 8 years ago

    Biblically speaking, having two wives if properly married would not be seen as adulterous relationship,but polygamous. Whether it is spiritually wrong  or sin is to be determined by those involved. It is definitely not adulterous.

  5. xLMTPx profile image52
    xLMTPxposted 8 years ago

    Look at the 10 commandments and the Beatitudes.

  6. yes2truth profile image59
    yes2truthposted 8 years ago

    In The New Testament Paul says that if you wish to fulfil the role of a bishop (an overseer, not a man in authority) then you will be the husband of one wife.

    This says to me that there were church members in the first century church who did have more than one wife. So two or more wives is not adulterous. King David had six wives, I think, and the Ten Commandments were in force in his day.

  7. profile image0
    sneakorocksolidposted 8 years ago

    I think for the sake of sanity we should not consider this an option. It will ultimately lead to somone getting hurt and most likely it will be the husband. I love my wife and I do appreciate her efforts to keep me in check but to double this fun no thanks. I can't keep up with one why would you do that to yourself unless you're a controling person who demands obiedence and who would want to live with him? Lets call it wrong and move on.

  8. Valerie F profile image58
    Valerie Fposted 8 years ago

    Technically, maybe not adulterous, but it is problematic.

    Okaying polygamy if a man can take care of all his wives is one thing. But name any single instance of polygamy in which no wife was favored over another, there was no jealousy, no neglect, and no cases of women and children forced to compete for the attention of the father. The pitfalls of polygamy were detailed in the Bible, going all the way back to Abraham and Jacob and the problems their wives had.

    Then there is the matter of Biblical context. Bishops in the early Church, while allowed to be married, could not have more than one wife because they were supposed to be examples to the community. This shows that monogamy was regarded as preferable.

    In the second Creation story, there was only one man and one woman created for each other. Even when polygamy was tolerated, the second Creation story was taken to mean that we were made to be monogamous, and polygamous relationships fall short of that ideal.

    So polygamy may not fall very neatly under the "adultery" category, but there are plenty of reasons even aside from that that it can and probably should be considered sinful.

  9. Peter Dickinson profile image69
    Peter Dickinsonposted 8 years ago

    It would only be adulterous if you were living your life around Christian principles. Other nations and religions live my different rules. Early Christians had more than one 'wife'.
    Adam and Eve of course never heard of Christ but Eve was Adam's second 'wife' and I don't recollect a divorce from the first. Today there are many Christian men who have one wife and one or more mistresses. They cannot be adulterous because they are not married to one partner. Does that make the relationship less of a sin through Christian eyes.
    I have two 'wives' (not officially married to either). I love them both deeply. My life is very very complicated. And yes they know about each other. It would be less complicated if they did not. So as a non Christian does this make me an adulteror?

  10. Kebennett1 profile image60
    Kebennett1posted 8 years ago

    Adultery is the voluntary sexual intercourse between a married person and another person who is not a woman's/man's spouse. wikipedia

    sexual relations between a married person and someone other than the spouse. Written or customary prohibitions or taboos against adultery constitute part of the marriage code of virtually every society. Indeed, adultery seems to be as universal and, in some instances, as common as marriage. Encyclopedia Britannica

    Biblical Adultery:
    SEXUAL ADULTERY—“Conjugal infidelity. An adulterer was a man who had sexual intercourse with a woman he was not married to, either a married woman or one who was engaged to be married. A woman who did the same thing was an adulteress. Adultery is fornication. The Bible regards adultery as a great sin and a great social wrong. It has been inferred from John 8:1-11 that this sin became very common during the age preceding the destruction of Jerusalem.” Adultery without sexual intercourse—Jesus Christ warned, “You have heard that it was said to those of old, ‘You shall not commit adultery.’ But I say to you that whoever looks at a woman to lust after her has committed adultery already with her in his heart.”
    Author: Matthew G. Easton

    Is having two wives legal? If you can not have two wives legally, then how could it not be adulterous? In the Christian belief system it is adulterous. If you have no belief in God and His commandments then to you it probably is not adulterous. If you do not believe in the legal system then it is not adulterous.

    I personally believe it is adultery, morally and legally! I see many others already disagree!

  11. Synclesian profile image78
    Synclesianposted 8 years ago

    I would have to agree with jak2009. From the beginning, God's desire was one husband,one wife. But due to the hardness of man's heart, God has allowed mankind to deviate into less than perfect arrangements (see Mark 10:1-9).  At the time the New Testament was written, in the Roman world, people had more than one wife. Even Christians in the church did. This is why in 1 Timothy 3:2 one of the requirements to be an elder was "husband of one wife."  It was not adulterous to have more than one, but complicating and problematic.  Like David in the Old Testament, who had multiple wives, God allowed it, but you can read the troubles he had. David was very lustful, and "needed" more women. He crossed the line with Bathsheba, which WAS a case of adultery. God said through Nathan to David:
    'I also gave you your master's house and your master's wives into your care, and I gave you the house of Israel and Judah; and if that had been too little, I would have added to you many more things like these!" (2 Sam 12:8). 
    God allowed him to have more wives, but not to commit adultery.

  12. Lee Boolean profile image57
    Lee Booleanposted 8 years ago

    If its a sin is debatable, as long as neither of them find out... but look at the down side: Two mothers in law! yikes!!!

  13. macbeth25 profile image55
    macbeth25posted 8 years ago

    Only of the laws of your area and your relilgious beliefs make it so.  Clancy's THE BEAR AND THE DRAGON mentions that while Roman Catholic priests may not marry, priests of another segment of the Catholic "group" may.  Jerry Pournelle in the JANISSARIES series mentions that while priests in the the service of Yatar may marry, those who hope to get higher positions may not.  Mormons in the United States, while they no longer do so, usually had more than one wife.  Whether or not something is illegal or immoral depends, always, on the "rules" of the place and time.

  14. VOICE CIW profile image77
    VOICE CIWposted 8 years ago

    Having two wives is adulterous. No matter what society feels about it or what society laws feel about it. Any unlawful sexual relations between a married woman and someone not her husband or between a married man and someone not his wife is adultery. But, Jesus went further, He said whoever look on a woman or a man to lust after them have already committed adultery in their heart. People in society may say it depends on this or that, but, you know they don't have any heaven or hell to put you in. All that matters is what God feels about it.

  15. johnmatrix profile image59
    johnmatrixposted 8 years ago

    I agree with yes2truth. I wish to add that from my studies I now believe that fornication in the biblical sense is idolatry, not sex before marriage.

    I also don't think consensual sex among adults is fornication or adultery. Adultery, to me, involves a betrayal, such as a desire to leave the marriage for someone else. Fornication, to me, is idol worship. If sex is your idol then I guess that's fornication. But all normal healthy people like sex, so when does it become idolatry and who is to judge?

    Abraham had sex with Hagar and it was approved by Abraham's wife Sarah, and who knows how many other maid servants he joined with for sex? David and Solomon had many wives and sex slaves as well.

    I see a double standard preached where certain men of God in the OT were able to have hundreds of sex slaves...and NT preachers gloss over that and tell us we can't have any fun. So men end up frustrated and commit other sins, or even commit crimes, all because they don't get enough sex and can't control their natural passions. I see lying, cheating, stealing, murdering, arrogance, selfishness, gossiping, gluttony, being angry at people without a just cause, etc. as being more sinful than having consensual sex.

    We are so hung up on sex as being evil that we miss the things I just mentioned above, and many people end up living lives plagued by guilt, hangups, and inhibitions.

  16. GreatContent profile image61
    GreatContentposted 8 years ago

    Having 2 wives, but it can, depending on the situation, be a problem. Torah gives men instructions on how to handle several wives. One scripture is Deut 21. A polygamous problem would be marrying 2 women who are sisters. That could cause a problem(Lev 18:18). Overall, polygamy is not wrong.

    There are several things one must think and consider. If a man has a wife, and he wants a second wife, then that decision should weigh on what the wife thinks. The wife should decide if she wants her husband to enjoy a second wife.

    Another thing is how would you handle these wives sexually, emotionally. Will your love be equal to both wives? What relation does the child of your first wife have with your second wife? So, if the man can handle all these, then he would be ok. Honestly, this lifestyle is not ideal for many men, but for some, it can be done.

  17. profile image43
    Amy Luckeyposted 8 years ago

    Moses was given by Jethro his daughter (Zepporah). Jethro wasthe man he shephered for..  He had 2 sons, Gershom and Eliezer.  Mirian and Aaron turned against Moses because of his wife,an Ethiopian woman (a black slave girl).

  18. grayknight profile image61
    grayknightposted 8 years ago

    There are many Old Testament examples of the problems polygamy can cause.

    However, there are specific cases in which it seemed to work more or less.  Remember that ALL of the sons of Israel received of the God-given blessing (except Reuben), regardless of the fact that they came from multiple mothers who were married to their father at the same time.

    As a Latter-day Saint, I believe what The Book of Mormon teaches: that strict monogamy is the general rule, but that God will command His people to practice exceptions for a time when there are extenuating circumstances (i.e., there are significantly more faithful women around than there are men to marry them).

  19. profile image0
    brotheryochananposted 7 years ago

    having two wives is not adultery unless one of the wives is the wife of another man. This question is phrased wrong. Having sex with a married person NOT married to you is adultery. Having two wives is just plain lucky, LOL, or not, lol.
    There are indeed successful men of god that had more than one wife, solomon had wayyyyy just enough, hehe.. ahem,.. too many and that proved to be his downfall, adam had one wife and that proved to be mankinds downfall, Paul said he wished all men were as he.... single.
    The normal or common is to be married.
    So i really think that this is a cultural dilemma, certainly in north america, polygamy is frowned upon and illegal (we of course are called to be peacemakers so we don't dare upset the cart on that rule)
    I personally think that a man can truly only love one woman at a time and therefore a quick death is best after a couple of years hahahahaha. joking. cudn't resist, of course i am single and i know the absolute majority of my time is devoted to yahweh.

  20. John B Badd profile image59
    John B Baddposted 7 years ago

    If they know about eachother and are ok with it then it is not adulterous.
    If it is a hiddent fact from one or both wives, like wives living across town or in other cities, then it is adulterous.

  21. proton66 profile image60
    proton66posted 7 years ago

    Two wives is ok if God says so. But two wives and committing adultery is a whole different matter. Since some do it for lust and others due to high social status like those kings found in the bible, people should avoid it altogether. The Christian world of modern times do not advocate it simply because of potential problems, and there is a law against it.

    After all, we are a bunch of carnally-minded people who do not know how to behave. So, forget two and stick to one at a time.

  22. Scott_Grigg profile image41
    Scott_Griggposted 7 years ago

    I'm not sure about that but it's most definitely adventurous!

  23. profile image0
    DaveLawrenceMusicposted 6 years ago

    Both by law and Biblically.  But your conscience probably already confirmed that.

  24. Darrell Roberts profile image70
    Darrell Robertsposted 6 years ago

    If a man marries two women according to the scripures that they have faith in, and the women agree and are happy with this situation then there should be no problem. The key is it is condoned in the scripture as long as the man takes care of both women equally.

  25. tamarawilhite profile image91
    tamarawilhiteposted 22 months ago

    In Christianity, yes, though modern variations say you can become Christian with several wives but then cannot add more wives.
    In Islam, no, limit is four wives and unlimited sex slaves.