I became a fan of a new Hubber, followed, and left some short, innocuous fan mail. Something like "She really knows about SEO..."
Ready for this...She denied the fan mail?!? What in the world. Yes, let me add, I was her 3rd fan, and possibly her 1st fan mail.
Now what kind of ingrate pulls that kind of s***?
I could have taken the high road, let it roll off my back. No. I promptly went and "defanned" her. It felt good, but I will never know why she denied my fan mail.
Has anybody else had a similar occurrence of complete ingratitude and actually bad behavior even?
P.S. This make not effect my incident's pertinacity, but she was British.
I can think of no valid reason to reject fan mail unless it's inappropriate which yours wasn't. All I can think of is, being British, she might not appreciate the concept of fan mail. Since the Beatles they haven't really had any occasion to use the term 'fan'.
Is the impolite behaviour of one member a good reason to be negative towards all British people, I wonder??
Sorry. Didn't mean to come across as offending the British people. My intention was to offend the British Government.
Re/ insulting the Government, maybe that is almost impossible to do. They are so good at insulting the opposite side in Parliament. Anyway it seems the only opinions politicians really care about is what the press think of them or might say about them.
BTW If someone says words to the effect of - I am following you so follow me, I tend to ignore that type of fan mail.
Oh you can't insult that lot, we try it all the time and it's water of a ducks back. Our illustrious leader left his baby in a pub, (he thought somebody else was taking care of it, apparently loads of people do it). Huh? Press had a field day and he's still swanning around being a complete moron. If a whole nation are rude about him what chance do you have? I'm a British ex-pat by the way
They know what 'Groupies' are!
For me, I think the rudest I have been treated on this site in a similar way was recently, when I wished someone All the Best and Get Well Soon.. after they had stated in a hub that they had just come through an operation.
They just completely ignored my (and another's) genuine wishes and continued to communicate with others!
So... I got their message loud and clear and in return, my message is... "if you read this Please Delete my post on your hub... because the value of it's true meaning was lost in your empty reply!"
Sorry, but as a British person I can only say this statement is utter rubbish. I have never heard of this being a problem before with British Hubbers, and it could just as easily have happened with an American, a Russian, a Frenchman, or in fact any other nationality of Hubber. To make out it is to do with a nationality is ludicrous!
Yes, I'm afraid that I have.
I won't go into details, but I was a fan of another member, and I encouraged others to read his work, but, sadly and inexplicably, he made completely untrue accusations against me, and insulted me several times, until HP finally dealt with the matter.
As you say, a complete shock, but that's life on the 'WWW', I suppose.
Wow.... what a terrible version of the story!
Of course you surely ensured that you made a whole raft of derogatory remarks rubbishing that party and his work.. Surely? ON HIS HUB!!
I don't believe the other party appreciated the flattery attached to the 'whatever' similarity to his previously published work!
I am well aware that that particular party has had his ideas and content style 'copied' by many 'hubbers' and others... many of whom followed him - perhaps for that very reason!
Interesting result though... but it appears from your post here that it still 'smarts' huh?
Maybe it's possible that she just might not have moderated her fan mail yet? You did say that it's her first fan mail. Maybe she doesn't know how to moderate yet, since she is new here. I never knew if we get a notification when our fan mail is denied. I'm curious now. Did you get such a notification?
Yeah, 'cos all British people are Hollywood cartoon villains who delight in pulling the wings off flies and denying people's fan mail. /sarcasm
All hubbers have the right to either accept or deny fan mail that is why the feature is there - hubbers follow and unfollow each other all the time.
Also, there are quite a few of us British hubbers around who might just think you are a bit rude for making comments like 'but she is British
Maybe "she" was annoyed because "she" was a "he"? - just a thought
Maybe because she was new she didn't understand what fan mail is or even where to find it. It took me a couple of weeks to find my way around. But then I am British!
Don't take it personal. There are many other hubbers to follow!
I think she might have taken it the wrong way. or maybe she didn't understand what it was like christin53 says.
I've clicked on all sorts of wrong buttons before. Maybe she's like me?
I've never denied fan mail. Why would you do that? I don't know if anyone has ever denied mine. I never really paid much attention to that. Silly human.
My idea is that she may have not moderated her fanmail. There is no way to know if she denied it without she stating that. If she is new she may not know how to moderate the fan mail just yet. Why would a new person deny a compliment? Makes no sense.
That's rather odd. I love fan mail. Almost too much, in fact.....
If she is new to HubPages, which by the sound of things she might be, perhaps she does not understand the concept of following, fans and fanmail. Some people are wary of connecting with people online, perhaps she tought you were a stalker or a spammer.
Or maybe she thought SEO was a euphemism for something creepy....
Most likely not, but it's a possibility.
What could be creepy about saying something like, "she really knows her SEO.....?"
Okay, never mind.
I deny fan mail when it includes statements asking me to follow the person back or to take a look at their Hubs. And recently I went through all of my fan mail, back to the dawn of fan mail, and deleted any messages from users who show as now being banned.
That is a good idea. How can you tell they are banned? By going to their page and seeing the message, or is there an easier way to tell. That must have taken you some time!
I do that with comments in hubs too. HubPages doesn't report a broken link when a Hubber is banned. So I need to review comments from time to time by following the link back to their profile. Relache has a good point, I need to do that with my fan mail too.
Relache - how do you find which users are banned from the fanmail info? Not sure you'll see, but thought I'd ask
That's a great idea Relache. I have unfollowed banned people but haven't deleted their fan mail. Thanks for the idea. I too hate when someone leaves a fan mail and ask me to follow them, check out their hubs or leave a link.
Oh please. Give me a break.
Why do some people get so completely overly dramatic about inconsequential nonsense?
Yes, I literally went into shock because of this.
No. Actually, I thought my over-dramatization of a forum title, would juxtapose nicely next to a rather mundane question.
It's called sarcasm, look it up.
BTW- You got overly worked up over my little post.
The same post detailing the situation which you deemed inconsequential. Yet you had to comment. This makes you "some people" like me.
Good one...nice to see someone with a sense of humor!
I have to agree with the others who think that maybe it was done by accident, being a newbie and all...
Yeah, maybe he or she doesn't understand fan mail. Or maybe, she doesn't want it showing on her profile and doesn't know you can turn it off.
There's always the thing, too, about hitting the wrong button by accident - especially for someone who's new and hasn't run into enough "accidents" to know to slow down. Some accidents can be undone. Some can't.
My initial reaction was what if she accidently hit the wrong button, they are pretty close to each other!
But I have no idea why anyone would deny fan mail, aside from the obvious "I followed you, you follow me" fan mail.
I love hearing from my "fans." Every time I read a piece of fan mail I smile. Someone took the time to send me a message saying they liked my work and for me it's greatly appreciated.
I won't deny your fan mail if you send me some lol tee hee hee
I reject quite a lot of fan mail. If I don't think it is genuine, or if it doesn't fit with the messages I want to show on my feed - I don't bother with it. Yes, it's a bit rude. No, I don't lose any sleep over it.
I admit playing the look at me and love me game for the first part of my 'career' - now I just want money.
Wow... you shock easily. If denied fan mail shocks you, you would likely faint dead away at any of my family dinners. Seriously though I'm going with wrong button by mistake.
Queen Victoria was supposed to have said "We are not amused."
Was that in response to a similar incident?
When you post fan mail, it's not shown by default until the recipient explicitly accepts it. Is it possible she just hasn't approved your fan mail yet?
No,It actually said "denied"
I feel foolish for asking this question now. I always thought my
type of humor is misinterpreted on black and white 1080p or whatnot.
Like mentioning British people. More of an attempt at self-effacing humor; portraying myself as an ignorant American, scared of all the Brits he's never met.
Joke is on me for trying to joke with the humorless(mostly anyway)
Complete ingratitude, hmmm.... do you think they should be thankful for your work? As for being rude, why is it rude? She has complete freedom to fan whom she wants, same as you. Just because you fan her it doesn't mean she must fan you as well; only fan those whose writing touches you in some way. It's okay if your writing doesn't touch her or isn't loved by someone, there are always others that will love it. I say she hit the wrong key, but now you've un-fanned her, so she may be offended.
What comes around goes around, don't forget, while you're unfanning people.
I don't think he was worried about her not 'fanning' him back, it was the fact she apparently denied his fan mail as if it was offensive in some way.
I am with many here who think this could be an accidental denial of fan mail, or someone who doesn't understand what SEO actually stands for so denied the fan mail in ignorance.
I don't know who the hubber was but it was entirely up to her to accept or reject the fan mail, for any reason at all, weird or worthy.
One of the pleasures of working here is that our accounts are our accounts.
It might have been a relative of WriteAngled, of course. And she might have noticed your 'Ceratin Hubs' page.
Personally, I'm far too busy going to tea with the Queen to moderate fan mail. Not to mention all those spying missions for the Home Office, and car chases in black Aston Martins, all while I'm wearing mini-skirts and knee length boots. Such is the life of the average British subject. Busy busy busy. Sigh.
Um, maybe she did actually press the wrong button. The first fanmail is generally a cause for excitment, not offence.
I cannot be certain how she could misinterpret your message. Anyway, some people are difficult to figure out. Don't worry too much about it. As someone mentioned, it's all part of the 'WWW' world.
Quite possibly she clicked the wrong button accidentally. It happens, but if she was defanned, maybe she could have questioned it. Also being new could have caused her to make an error. And pointing out that she was British? what the heck does that have to do with it? You may have acted in haste my friend. LOLLLL
I suppose it narrows the field of likely suspects down a bit.
We do have such odd ways you know and we have been this way for so long that it is really difficult for us to change. Oh wait, maybe that is not a trait of the British but the English. Anyone for afternoon tea and a game of croquet? Shall I make the cucumber sandwiches or go to the red telephone box at the end of the street and invite the guests?
This might seem weird, but maybe it's the SEO thing. She may be a very great writer or SEO person, but there are a lot of self-titled "Gurus" out there. Maybe she wants to avoid the "SEO writer" cliche.
I helped a company out with their website a few years ago because it was not search engine friendly. They put a fabulous write-up on my LinkedIn page and I have it set to hidden. While I totally appreciate the compliment, I don't want people to think that I've given myself the title of "SEO guru extraordinaire" because I reallllllly don't think that's an accurate picture of me. The company's website just needed a little help.
But yeah, your comment seems innocent. I'm just trying to figure out a legit reason someone would deny it. A bit of a stretch because one little mention of SEO shouldn't hurt.
Maybe she accidentally denied it. Or maybe she thinks you're kind of cute and her super jealous husband might think there's something between you because of your comment. (You know those crazy jealous types.)
Or maybe she thinks she's terrible at SEO and didn't deserve such a nice compliment.
Mel, you make a good point. Since Google changes what it wants so often, it is difficult for anyone to take the label SEO Guru. There are guys out there who sell expensive programs because they are self proclaimed SEO Gurus, and theit advice doesn't work because Google changes things up so often.
Treat it for the instance it happened and move forward. I have two hubs that are ***cking awesome, but the traffic on them is shite, complete shite. Do I have heaps of comments on them? No. Are they in the top ranking for SEO? no. I KNOW they are awesome hubs, even if other people don't give a rats arse.
You cannot please some people some of the time and the best suggestion is not to take things personal.
The moment you do you won't last long with this site or similar ones. Write it off and move forward. There are more important concerns anyway
Just to clarify, is 'defanning' the same as 'unfollowing'?
Yes, that is correct. On HP followers used to be called fans, but then it was changed to followers which many felt implied a kind of creepy stalkerish person shuffling around after them like some kind of zombie. Unfortunately HP stuck with their decision and fans became officially known as followers instead.
I have to admit that given the silly comments I leave for fan mail, I wouldn't be surprised if people rejected them. I wouldn't mind either. No big deal.
sounds like a sock puppet who doesn't want fan mail. maybe you were too quick to judge? (just an option, no offense intended)
by pjdscott 14 years ago
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