Is it lying to simply not say what you're feeling?

1. 84

   rachellrobinsonposted 14 years ago

   Is it lying to simply not say what you're feeling?
   
   If asked a direct question and one answers falsely that is a lie, however is it still a lie if you don't speak up?

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2. 67

   dosborne08posted 14 years ago

   Absolutely not. At the end of the day, you have the right to just not say anything.
   
   While it is your right, the person asking the question may not feel to good about it and it may cause a rift in that relationship.
   
   So it is something to think about which choice best for that relationship and that situation.

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3. 60

   sammyfictionposted 14 years ago

   No , it would not be lying, it's more or less a freedom of speech,

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4. 60

   Quirinusposted 14 years ago

   Our gut feelings usually guide us towards acts of compassion: no, it should not be considered as lying. 
   
   When we sense that we may hurt or inconvenience someone by admitting to our feeling, our intention should be our best guide.  As an example, we meet someone who seems to have so many burdens of her/his own and she/he asks if everything is alright with us, it may be appropriate to say a noncomittal yes, to avoid adding further burdens to him or her.
   
   If our basis of our conduct in life is putting easy-to-use labels on actions, in effect stereotyping them, it may be considered lying because you did not admit what you were feeling.
   
   But if our basis of our conduct is our highest truth, which we could choose to be love, then by not admitting your feeling, you may then be considered compassionate instead of being labelled as lying.

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5. 72

   onegoodwomanposted 14 years ago

   It could be a ly of omission............if you 'go along to get along', you will at some point , pay for that silence.
   
   By not speaking up, when the opportunity was there, you could be giving your silent approval.
   
   Sometimes this matters little, ( what to serve at the company picnic), at others it matters a great deal.........(should we disconnect Dad's breathing machine).....
   
   The term, "speak now, or forever hold your peace", is a great barometer, can you hold it inward?
   
   It is a terrible thing to reflect and realize that you should have spoken up.

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6. 59

   nancymeposted 14 years ago

   I think it's a neutral stance. Maybe it's like if i speak i shall have to lie but if i don't am safe.

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7. 86

   graceomalleyposted 14 years ago

   I think of knowing how to answer a question without falling into either a direct lie or a falsehood  as "discretion." When I looked up decresion I thought the 2 definitions fit this well:
   
   1. The quality of behaving or speaking in such a way as to avoid causing offense or revealing private information.
   2. The freedom to decide what should be done in a particular situation.
   
   There's a proverb that goes something to the effect: "A wise man considers his words, but a fool only desires to reveal his own mind."

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8. 71

   ddsurfscaposted 14 years ago

   It is not lying, but itt is deception.  Lying is telling an untruth, but not saying anything is living that lie without words.

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9. 60

   Barry Silverposted 14 years ago

   No, it's not a lie but it's probably not very helpful either.

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10. 60

    Kaniel Loughranposted 14 years ago

    If you were to say nothing at all, then no, it could not logistically constitute a lie. However, should you give 90% of the story and leave out a critical point that may put you in an uneasy position, then you have committed a lie of omission.

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11. 37

    Aair Aaqilposted 14 years ago

    If you are directly asked how you feel and you answer with not the truth or an implicit omission of the truth then you are lying. Lying through omission is still lying as you are speaking (or not speaking) with the intent of misdirection and deception, the same as lying.

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12. 52

    footprintzposted 14 years ago

    No.  People can become uncomfortable when you are honest, but if you are not the issue can potentially boil.

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13. 84

    tsmogposted 14 years ago

    I'm sorry I can't say anything on this matter , , ,just kidding, A feeling is subjective. It is yours. If it were lying there wouldn't be similar safeguards like the fifth amendment, if I understand correctly.

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14. 61

    Scribblingposted 14 years ago

    I dont hink it is lying. Discretion, prudence, wisdom are all words that come to mind when I think about concealing  or keeping some information about myself to myself. Sometimes our feelings are not worth telling anyone about, you know self pitty, self doubt (sometimes). So like anything else, i think it is subjective but overall could quite possibly not be a lie.
    
    just scribbling...

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15. 60

    your cybersisterposted 14 years ago

    I don't consider it a lie when you don't volunteer information.  As you said, if you are directly asked and you don't answer honestly you are guilty of lying, but what if being completely honest only serves to hurt someone?  If a friend asks if you like their new haircut or new outfit and you don't, is it important that you be brutally honest or is it okay to soften the blow?   Aren't there times that "white lies" would be acceptable?  I do think that leaving things out of an explanation, especially when it is advantageous to you to do so.  That is lying by omission.

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16. 35

    edhanposted 14 years ago

    I guess sometimes a white lie will help to avoid bad situations. Some people lies not to hurt the other parties. But of course there are lies which are truly bad.
    
    Depending on different situations, one will react with answers that will only be suitable at that instant.

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17. 84

    ii3rittlesposted 14 years ago

    Not saying how you feel is being dishonest. Being dishonest and lying are one in the same. One you speak with words, and the other you speak in silence.
    
    I've learned that in my relationship. When my fiance asks me whats wrong, its better to just tell him then avoid it. Avoiding our own feelings and misunderstandings lead to fights.

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18. 0

    jasper420posted 14 years ago

    depends on the situation and on your moral values some say yes and some say no i say if you want to keep something to yourself thats your bussiness

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19. 44

    Sleepincotposted 14 years ago

    No, you are not lying. It is sometimes wise to keep your thoughts to yourself, such as if your thoughts would anger someone.

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20. 0

    Curiadposted 14 years ago

    While it is not "Technically" a lie, it can cause serious problems in a relationship. There are so many different situations this might apply to that there is no one "Right" answer.
    
    I find that it is best to share the truth of my feelings whenever possible. By this I mean that if it will make a difference to someone I will share it. If I am in a obvious situation where sharing my feelings will not help the situation at all then I keep it to myself.
    
    This is of course subjective.

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21. 61

    Lovesloveposted 14 years ago

    sometimes its best not to ask a question if you dont want a truthful answer ..you may ask a question and not like the answer that is given ,and be upset by it,so unless you want to hear the truth dont ask !!
    
    I have a friend who will always give a truthful answer to any question..I have learnt over time that if I am not confident about the answer I will get then I dont ask the question !!
    
    To twist the truth is a lie .

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22. 70

    melaineposted 14 years ago

    No. It's not a lie. You are entitled to keeping your feelings to yourself.

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23. 61

    Dave Mathewsposted 14 years ago

    It is definitely a "LIE" To omit the truth, or avoid speaking the truth is still LYING.

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24. 61

    dustbunnieposted 14 years ago

    Ok, To deny friends or loved ones in your life the knowledge of knowing your true feelings on things, in a sense is denying them a sense of the true you. But what you have to ask yourself is would you want someone to "simply not tell you what they are feeling" It isnt really lieing to not say what your feeling but its not being honest either. It borders on avoidance if you will.Perhaps are you maybe scared they may not except your feelings on things? Dont hold back, but remember to be tactful yet sensitive when voicing your feelings.
    dustbunnie

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25. 65

    Mercia Collinsposted 13 years ago

    even in a relationship, one has a right to privacy. What you feel at one minute about something may not be the same feeling that you have, when you have had time to think the matter through properly. First reactions to something may change rapidly

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