Handling Money after Wedding
Money is Source of Conflicts
Money is a big source of conflicts in many marriages. If you and your spouse cannot agree on money, chances are that your marriage is headed for bigger trouble than you can imagine.
Yes, I Will Marry You
Many people do very little to prepare for marriage immediately they seal the proposal deal with, "yes, I will marry you". As soon as that is achieved, they immediately start preparing for the wedding ceremony with very little preparation, if any, for the marriage. Marriage is not just a continuation of friendship but rather marriage has specific roles and challenges.
Sealing the Deal “Yes, I Will Marry You”
Accept Each Other’s Debts
Immediately after the wedding, you no longer have anything you can call "my money" and that all you have is "our money". This is easily said than done. It is no longer "my debts" and "your debts" but rather "our debts". When you accept each other as partners, you accept each other's liabilities and assets. Before marriage, always make a full disclosure of your liabilities and assets to your partner.
Love of Money Root of All Evil
If you are about to get married and one was to ask you why you think your marriage will succeed. The most probable answer would be she is a good lady, I am a cool guy, and we are in love. Another answer would be she is a devoted Christian and I am a staunch believer. The truth is this is not a guarantee that your marriage will succeed and be fulfilling.
Problem not Amount of Money
There are some crucial issues that a couple needs to understand and discuss before marriage. One of these issues is how you handle money in your marriage. In most cases, the problem usually is not the amount of money that a couple has, but rather in their attitude toward money and how they handle the money. The good Bible says that the Love of Money is the root of all evil. The Bible does not say Lack of Money is the root of all evil.
False Reasoning
Most couples assume that if they make an extra $5,000 every month, they could meet their expenses satisfactorily. The irony is that this is true whether they are presently making $2,000 or $50,000. This is simply a false reasoning. Real satisfaction is not found in any amount of money. A fulfilling life is found in a good relationship but not in things. Your life goal should not be one of accumulating things. But you should have food for the children, clothes to wear and shelter. All these require money and that is why it is perfectly in order to work for a pay.
Ladder of Financial Success
Couples, do not allow your pursuit of money erode your relationships otherwise you will find money useless. The great tragedy in life is not failing to get what you go after. The greatest tragedy in life is in getting it and finding out it was not worth the trouble. There are many men and women today who manage to climb the ladder of financial success only to find they left their families at the bottom.
It is Never Right to Worry
It's not the amount of money that is important. What is important is how you use it - sound planning, buying, saving, investing and giving are all part of life fulfillment. Couples have to pray, work and do any good things to change their financial status, but it is never right to worry about it. A poor person can be a slave of money just as a rich person. When money or lack of it pushes you to depression, unhappiness, resentment and frustration, then you are actually a servant of money.
Nothing to Call "My Money"
Immediately after the wedding, you no longer have anything you can call "my money" and that all you have is "our money". This is easily said than done. It is no longer "my debts" and "your debts" but rather "our debts". When you accept each other as partners, you accept each other's liabilities and assets. Before marriage, always make a full disclosure of your liabilities and assets to your partner.
You Are Partners, Not Competitors
Now that you have wedded, how do you spend "our money"? Only full and open discussion will work in financial decisions. You are partners and not competitors. No major purchases should be made without consulting your partner. You may define and agree that for any purchases exceeding $1,000, you have to consult each other.
Avoid Credit Card
Plan ahead and save. Save a minimum 10% of your income and put it in a bank account before anything else. For newly wedded couples, stick to cash only policy in your purchases. Bear in mind that if you buy now without cash, you will pay much more latter. Is it very important that you buy your purchases on credit card? With only a little strain, can you be able to buy things on cash now and liberate yourself financially?
Financial Bondage
If the newly wedded couples are not careful with debts and credit, they could easily find themselves in financial bondage from unwise credit purchases.
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