Do you think it is good to have your spouse/partner to be your best friend as we

1. 67

   Rosie2010posted 13 years ago

   Do you think it is good to have your spouse/partner to be your best friend as well?
   
   My late husband was my best friend, and so when my husband died, I lost my best friend too.
   
   

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2. 60

   thisismylife9123posted 13 years ago

   I know it's hard to be without the person that you shared your heart with but when you really love someone, it just happens. You share laughs, thoughts, and feelings and eventually they become the closest person to you.

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3. 66

   simeonvisserposted 13 years ago

   Don't put all your eggs in one basket (on one person)... sometimes there are things you should discuss with your best friend (first) but not with your husband, you know.

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4. 60

   MrsNoumanposted 13 years ago

   I think that is the best relationship to have. It makes you feel full not as though there is something missing. It is an unexplainable closeness that is breath taking and envied.

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5. 67

   medicfrogsposted 13 years ago

   Yes, your partner should definitely be your best friend. We all die, it's the one fact of life that will never change. All that matters is how we spend our lives, and I'm sure your husband's happiest thoughts were knowing that he was such an important part of your life.

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6. 0

   Butch Newsposted 13 years ago

   Your partner should be your best friend but one should try to have some other friends too.  For me that is extremely difficult because I'm very intelligent and have had many life experiences that almost no one will have.  Few would understand me.
   
   Finding someone able to be with me who I respect and admire is very, very difficult.  I find most people just too ignorant and lacking in knowledge.  It's like the other adults around me never grew up.
   
   For me, it has to be my partner that is my best friend... that is why we are partners.  But my partner has died so now I just have to cope and I was always reclusive from others anyway.  I find my sister a good friend and, while not able to be my best friend, she is someone I appreciate and can express myself to.
   
   So I understand your loss.  It's been nearly 17 years for me now and the first 10 were the hardest.  I'm too old and not well to expect a new partner, but you may yet find another.  I like to think there is a reason these things happen.  My partner who died wasn't the first in my life but definitely the love of my life.

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7. 60

   phiphiposted 13 years ago

   Yeah it is good to have your spouse as a good or best friend and you can share each and every thing with him or her which brings you more closer to each other like i share each and every thing with my husband and same goes with him and we are living happily after..

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8. 60

   Fotographerposted 13 years ago

   It is not just good. In fact it is the best thing ever. However, life and death are a part and parcel of each other. One has to move on, this is how it works.
   
   Think of the time you spent with him... do you think it would have been better if you have had some other best friend instead of him??

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9. 61

   Lovesloveposted 13 years ago

   YES....Your partner should be your ultimate BEST FRIEND..but you should also have friends outside  your marriage,one day you may be left alone without your partner for many reasons....you need friends to talk to and to offer support,if your partner is your BEST FRIEND  excluding all others then one day you may find you are completely alone in this big world.
   
   There are times when a partner is not the person you need to talk to...then you need a friend !!

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10. 69

    ExpandYourMindposted 13 years ago

    My condolences on the loss of your spouse and best friend. Yes, you would want your spouse to have some of the same attributes you seek in a best friend, loyalty/devotion, understanding, unselfishness, etc.

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11. 60

    libby101aposted 13 years ago

    I think those marriages that last are the ones where they have more.... I think your spouse should be your best friend! You should be able to tell that one person anything and they still wrap their arms around and you and say they still love you!

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12. 57

    fundermentalistposted 13 years ago

    yes it is good, after she's your closest friend and that's how it ought to be.
    
    http://goodmarriagetips.com

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13. 60

    Dave Mathewsposted 13 years ago

    It's a lot better than having them as your worst enemy, that's for certain. What do you think?

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14. 61

    easyfreerecipesposted 13 years ago

    of course! it is important to have other friends to vent and share with but you will spend more time with your spouse than anyone in your life, why not be best friends?!

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15. 84

    Happyboomernurseposted 13 years ago

    So sorry for your loss, Rosie.
    My husband is my best friend, love, lover, support system, etc. and it's really great, but as you so poignantly stated, it will make the loss more devastating should he pass away.
    The saving grace for me is that he encourages me to have other interests and activities such as my writing. He also encourages me to maintain other friendships, and I do the same for him.
    Thanks for posting this question. It's a good one.

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16. 67

    maheshpatwalposted 13 years ago

    First and foremost quality of a life partner is that he should understand your feelings and with whom you can be yourselves.

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17. 69

    Iontachposted 13 years ago

    You husband should definitely be your best friend, BUT you should also have another best friend as well.
    I think the best thing ever is when you can just sit down and blab on about everything and anything to your other half and for them to also communicate. It's good to be best friends or good friends with your other half, if you weren't the conversations would be dull, the relationship would be substance-less, and all you'd really have would be sex right?
    But on the other hand it's also great to have another best friend or maybe a couple more, cos not everything you want to talk to your husband about!
    p.s. Again, I'm sorry for your loss Rosie I say your husband was a character. X

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18. 58

    awoodogposted 13 years ago

    I really don't see it any other way. Your spouse/partner holds the strongest bond with you. They share the most intimate parts of your life.

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19. 66

    tenordjposted 13 years ago

    My wife is my best friend. I wouldn't want it any other way. I do have other friends who are very close to me, but none will ever share the bond that we have. I think it is a very good thing for your spouse to be your best friend.

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20. 60

    lilmissbookwormposted 13 years ago

    well firstly sorry for your loss. My partner was also my friend before we got together they do make the best relationships. So in answer to your question...yes.

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21. 69

    home witchposted 13 years ago

    If a relationship is truly successful then your partner is also your best friend. But that doesn't mean you can only have one best friend - I've got my husband and my best girl-friend, a true sister of my heart.

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22. 61

    Darrke Thoughtsposted 13 years ago

    Yes. At least that's what I hope for if I ever get a spouse...
    
    I'm sorry for your loss.  I suppose it's a time when your spouse being your best friend is not so good.  Friends are important, and no one person is likely to share all the same interests.  So I think many friends are good.  But I'd want my spouse to be right up at the top of the list of "bests"

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23. 80

    Treasuresofheavenposted 13 years ago

    Yes, spouse should be your best friend.  I had to learn this lesson.  When it comes down to it - your spouse is the one you can count on and depend on - in good times and bad. 
    Rosie, I hope and pray for you another best friend - but in the meantime, be a best friend to someone.

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24. 70

    Klenaposted 13 years ago

    My sincere condolences on the lost of your husband and best friend.
    
    The biggest thing to ask is if you regret it? And I get the feeling from you that you don't. You were blessed to have someone who were entirely "one" with. I'm best friends with my partner and we've both stated seperately that we are each others best friend. Which, of course, is terrifying.
    
    I do have other friends, of course, and some very good friends, but none who compare to my partner. And I'm not sure I would change it as it's made our relationship amazing.

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25. 69

    jagandelightposted 13 years ago

    Although I have not have the pleasure of this type of relationship as of yet, of having your spouse as a best friend, I absolutely agree that he/she should be your best friend, the one you hold most secret to your heart and can trust with all intimate details without feeling of fear,  criticism, or condemnation.

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26. 66

    holyjeans30posted 13 years ago

    I think it's necessary.  Just because they are your best friend truly doesn't have to mean they are your ONLY best friend.  I also think you should be best friends before you are each others spouse.  Just makes for a stronger relationship, and a deeper connection on more than one level.  You can always talk with your best guy friend or girl friend when needed. I have made the mistake of jumping straight into relationships without really knowing someone first to even know if I could even BE friends with them.  It sure makes it hard to stay in love with someone during troubled times later on if you don't even like them.

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27. 61

    sturner1posted 13 years ago

    I think it depends on the person. I have friends that are brutally honest, and keep me grounded, as well as having friends, who would sugar coat things so I don't feel bad. I think in order to marry someone, and love them you have to be friends first in order to get to know them. My husband and I are friends, but we are not best friends. It is exciting to be married and still discover things about your spouse every single day. There are things that I wouldn't want to confide in him such as relationship advice, that I share or get from my girlfriends, or personal experiences that you can only relate with other women, it keeps things fresh, and does not make someone feel smothered. I love my husband, but I wouldn't want to do everything with him, and I'm sure He feels the same way.  It depends on the person. Some people look for their best friend in their spouse, My girlfried says her husband completes her.....but I am content being whole by myself first. I am so sorry for your loss, be glad for the time that you had, and it makes it even more special because you were both on one accord.

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28. 63

    swedalposted 13 years ago

    Yes a spouse should also be the best friend. At least in a good relationship that is.

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29. 56

    FatherOfTwoposted 13 years ago

    HI, genuinely sorry to hear of your loss. It is obviously terrible to loose both your spouse and best friend, but as others have said, try to dwell on the good memories. In answer to the question, I truly believe it is essential in any lasting and loving marriage/ partnership, that the person you choose to be with, is both your best friend and spouse. I can truly say my wife is the closest friend I have (and ever have had), & I would not have it any other way. The commitment and trust required to have a happy and successful marriage make it a pre-requisite, in my opinion.
    Best wishes for the future

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30. 38

    Scott_Griggposted 13 years ago

    Yes, because you want to share a lot with that other person, but no, if that spouse is your ONLY best friend.  I mean, give any relationship a little bit of space.

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31. 61

    joshranwestposted 13 years ago

    yes I think your spouse should be your best friend, especially since marriage is all about communication and being open with each other. so best friends, yes.

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