Young ladies: Being an Independent career woman or “sugar baby” which would you

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   dashingscorpioposted 12 years ago

   Young ladies: Being an Independent career woman or “sugar baby” which would you choose and why?
   
   Fellow Hubber Pop Culture World recently posted a hub titled “How to Get a Sugar Daddy - Getting Tuition Paid and Being Spoiled”. The thing I found most fascinating was the poll question which has 50 respondents thus far. “Do you want to be a sugar baby? 70% answered yes, 26%  stated they already were, and only 4% said “No way. I’m an independent woman”. Can it really be possible in (this era) we live in that 96% of young ladies would rather have a "sugar daddy" than earn their own money via a career to spoil themselves?
   
   

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   ReneeDC1979posted 12 years ago

   Those are interesting numbers.  I am independent so my answer would be nice.  I guess it's nice to have someone pay all of your bills, but what are you giving in return?  How can you morally take advantage of someone for whatever reason?  And have we ever heard of the word no?? I find it deplorable for women to be diminished to this way of thinking and feel good about themselves the next morning.

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      ChristinSposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      I completely agree - where is the sense of self-worth in these women?

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      TrinityCatposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      Excellent answer, Renee.

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      ReneeDC1979posted 12 years agoin reply to this

      Thanks ChristinS and TrinityCat

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      Taleb80posted 12 years agoin reply to this

      I agree with you too.

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      ReneeDC1979posted 12 years agoin reply to this

      Yippie Taleb80 - thanks!!

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   Alecia Murphyposted 12 years ago

   I think Renee hit the nail on the head. You have to have a moral code of some sort to live by. And for me that is knowing I can't be bought at a price. While it's nice to have someone support you fully financially, you don't learn or grow by having others do for you.

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   Efficient Adminposted 12 years ago

   What is the difference between having a "Sugar Daddy" or a regular boyfriend? I just turned 50 years old and it has never been easy keeping the head above the water with no help from family all these years. In light of this, and I'm sorry if I offend anyone, if you got the stuff then use it to your advantage while you are still young.
   
   Get your college and car paid off then go and get yourself a career and be independent before your future husband comes along.  What is the difference between having a steady boyfriend and putting out versus a sugar daddy who is paying for your college and clothes and car?  Look at it this way -- the sugar daddy is the boyfriend who just happens to have a lot of money.

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      dashingscorpioposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      Most people would say the difference between a regular boyfriend and a "Sugar Daddy" is the woman is actually attracted to or in love with her boyfriend. A "Sugar Daddy" is not someone the girl has chemistry with nor is  she emotionally invested.$$$

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      Efficient Adminposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      Thank you dashing for that perspective and that really does make sense. I was coming from the aspect that a) some people think sex before marriage is a sin, or unmoral, so if you are going to sin you might as well shake those boobs and get a free car

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      ReneeDC1979posted 12 years agoin reply to this

      haha- wow efficient admin - i guess you have a point !?!?! but that is temporary - self worth is forever

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      Efficient Adminposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      ReneeDC I agree the sugar baby stuff is temporary and beauty is temporary but the stuff on the inside is forever.  So while those taa taas are firm and perky, go ahead and get some free college tuition. Haha I'm having so much fun with this one!

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      ReneeDC1979posted 12 years agoin reply to this

      haha - I see - as long as you are enjoying yourself

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      nenfeaposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      I'd say the difference is that in a healthy relationship one person doesn't provide for the other, but there is some measure of equality. A sugar daddy holds the purse strings and doles out the money because the sugar baby earns it with favors.

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   cat on a soapboxposted 12 years ago

   My preference falls in between. I like to manage on my own and make my own money , but I also like to be appreciated for my femininity and enjoy the perks it brings.. My observation is that a "sugar baby" has a shorter shelf-life.

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      ReneeDC1979posted 12 years agoin reply to this

      love our last line cat.

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      cat on a soapboxposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      Thanks,Renee . Too much high maintainence, uncertainty, and stress can cause an unattractive tension in the relationship.

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   sjkhanposted 12 years ago

   Being an independent woman is far better. Getting various benefits and money favours just on your physical appearance is not very ethical. Besides, women getting satisfied with being a sugar baby should for once try to earn by their intellect. Believe me it will feel great. Yes, the life of a sugar baby is very short. 'Cause beauty fades!

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   ieshab1posted 12 years ago

   I believe in being an independent woman rather than a Sugar baby.I don't like taking money from my own family.I feel the Passage in the Bible The Borrowers are servant to the lender is so true.If someone gives you money they feel you owe them.I have standards,and morals I won't seduce anyone for money because I feel nasty after.Thats horrible.It's better working honestly for your money.Trust me you will appreciate it more.I rather steal out a store f I am hungry than seduce a man for money to by food,clothes,etc.

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      ReneeDC1979posted 12 years agoin reply to this

      Great points ieshab 1

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   Express10posted 12 years ago

   I would never want to be a Sugar Baby. I prefer being independent because I don't like being told what to do, where to be, etc. I enjoy doing as I please. That poll probably was right as I know of fellow girls that want someone who has money. Some make a proud proclamation to whomever will listen. I have seen girls do absolute nonsense in pursuit of this as well. In the process, they lose and soon detest themselves. Perhaps they are frightened because they can't stand on their own feet? Even if that's true, it's not permanent. Nothing is permanent, including being a sugar baby.

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   Audra18posted 12 years ago

   Having a ‘sugar daddy’ as they call it in my mind’s eye is only degrading towards women, giving us a bad mark upon our gender when involving judgmental folk. The poll numbers shock me, yet disgust me at the same time, yet I am not all too surprised with each generation becoming soft and with a reduction in wanting to work for a decent, honest living.
   People lack morals and ethics now days and it’s only showing the outcome of it all in bondage and oppression that sickens me to my core. There should be more woman out there living upright, sincere work habits than trading in their bodies for money. It’s ghastly along with depressing to know that the female population is falling at such low standards instead of taking pride in their career.
   I choose to be independent and not need a man around to order me about!

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    ravenphotographyposted 12 years ago

    Looking at the younger generation of women, they definately seem to feel the need to have 'Sugar Daddy's" to take care of them. I always thought that women who seeked out 'Sugar Daddy's" just had daddy issues. However, media glamorizes, money and dating people with money and not going to college. So it makes sense that girls would want that type of lifestyle versus being independant.
    
    I myself, am independant. I am starting my own business, living by myself and single. Although I will admit when I date I do tend to lean towards men who have steady careers. Although I don't think any of them I have dated have tons of money but they were financially stable and that ment a lot to me. I did not want to date someone who wasn't and may wind up trying to lean on me for financial support. I would not mind having a rich boyfriend, but I would still break up with him at the drop of a hat if need be. His money ain't that special.

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       Express10posted 12 years agoin reply to this

       Financially stable is an expected quality, nothing to be ashamed of when looking for a mate. Doesn't sound like you are a sugar baby at all. His money is just that, his. As is yours

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    jayrissa9286posted 12 years ago

    My opinion is I would feel much more as though i have accomplished something if i went out and made the money on my own. I am 20 years old and i am a female and i dont think i could live with myself if i just sat doing nothing all day. i mean i am sure it sounds great and all that but what have you really accomplished through that?? just saying

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    Wendy S. Wilmothposted 12 years ago

    I prefer to be self-reliant. There is no better feeling than achievement on one's own, and no worse feeling for me than being dependent on another for my livelihood.  A culture of dependence (whether on government or other sources) is becoming the norm in the U.S., and I think it will be largely responsible for our downfall.

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       Taleb80posted 12 years agoin reply to this

       Great answer.

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    gmwilliamsposted 12 years ago

    Young women approach their lives & circumstances in many ways.  Some make their own way, depending upon their OWN resources to succeed. Others elect to have SOMEONE pay their way............. read more

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    JMHolmesposted 12 years ago

    Although being a sugar baby sounds like the easy route, there's an old adage that says, "Marry for money and you'll earn every penny."  Although we can judge the sugar babies in thinking they've got it easy, I'm sure they have to work as hard as the independent woman to keep the money flowing.  My preference? Being a sugar MAMA!  Is it sexist of me (albeit in reverse) to enjoy the liberation of making three times the salary of my man?  And do you think he might feel like he has to 'earn every penny'?  I wonder if we were to ask men if they'd want to be a sugar baby what their answer would be and if it would skew the same as for women....

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       dashingscorpioposted 12 years agoin reply to this

       JMHolmes, I hear what your're saying. I don't think "sugar babies" have any intention of marrying their "benefactors". Their goal is to keep the freedom that comes with being single while enjoying his financial resources. Men value looks over money.

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    minikittenposted 12 years ago

    Consider this, an entrepreneur will take on a persona to manipulate a person to buy their products.  They will package these products in fancy boxes with pretty images and market with a catchy ad.  If you got to know an entrepreneur you would probably find that they are nothing like the person in the store trying to sell you a new gadget, it's all an act created with the intention of making money.
        A sugar baby, in theory, is not that different from an entrepreneur.  They act ditzy, 'fun', sexy etc. in order to sell themselves.  They dress in nice clothes and apply cosmetics to 'improve the packaging'.  They target older men who will dote upon them until they die and the sugar baby then inherits part of their estate, alternatively they divorce the older man and receive a large payout.  If they're not aiming for the long haul then at the least they get a few years free from financial worry (many professional sugar babies are students) and the networking opportunities an older man can provide are very attractive.
        Although it is slightly akin to prostitution, I feel that sugar babies are written off as 'bimbos' when in fact, many are savvy business women who are simply playing the system.  Personally, I'd rather be independent, but then how many jobs will pay an 18 year old a fortune with all expenses paid for no more than a few hours work a day?

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       Efficient Adminposted 12 years agoin reply to this

       Excellent point. I would rather be an independent woman but who wants to live in stank rank poverty? I was so poor back in college I had to wash my clothes in a bathtub and look for spare change on the floor for food. Wouldn't wish that on anyone.

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       dashingscorpioposted 12 years agoin reply to this

       "Although it is slightly akin to prostitution" lol!
       I don't think "sugar babies" are the same as "trophy wives". They don't want to marry their "benefactor". They carve out time for them but rather live it up with girlfriends and guys their age.

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    TS23posted 12 years ago

    I am definitely an independent career driven woman. I will never be a sugar baby, relying on someone to handle my responsibilities. I value and appreciate my accomplishments more when I know I did it on my own. It is also very empowering and sexy to watch a woman or a man stand on his or her two feet, without stumbling. Great question and info.

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    TMilem924posted 12 years ago

    I prefer to be, and remain, independent. In my opinion, a woman who is independent has a sense of accomplishment by the end of the day.  I was raised to work for what I earn, and to never rely on anyone for help.  Even though it drives my husband insane, but I would prefer to pay for my own needs than to have his hard earned money do it for me.

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    jennshealthstoreposted 12 years ago

    I would much rather be independent. For many reasons. First off I could not see myself using someone else. If I love a person and they have money that they wish to spend on me, sure that is great but using another for the purpose of spending their money is just not something I could do. Next its good to be able to make it on your own. What if you are in the middle of college and have this nice apartment that your sugar daddy is paying for and all of a sudden he decides he is not paying  your way anymore. Then you are stuck plus you probably don't even know how to take care of yourself. Next I like a sense of accomplishment. Yes things are great to have, but knowing I worked hard for them brings things value.

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       dashingscorpioposted 12 years agoin reply to this

       You make an excellent point! The shelf life of a "sugar baby" is usually less time than needed to get a college degree. I suppose some become strippers that "work" their way through college when their Sugar Daddy quits paying for everything. lol!

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    tamarawilhiteposted 12 years ago

    I would choose Independent career woman. Then I could still support myself when the youth and beauty fade or he loses interest.

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    Cardiaposted 12 years ago

    I'd rather be an independent woman. While yes, I love being treated to things every now and then, I'd much rather be able to say that I worked hard for the things that I've done, own and accomplished, than to just say that they were given to me. My mother always said that working hard for something makes you appreciate it more, and I fully agree.
    
    Sometimes yes doing all the work can become a bit tiring or wearying, but it's nice to look back and said "I made it. This is all thanks to me."
    
    It's so funny - I saw this quote online a few minutes before seeing this question on Hubpages. I think it's quite fitting.
    
    “Some women choose to follow men, and some women choose to follow their dreams. If you're wondering which way to go, remember that your career will never wake up and tell you that it doesn't love you anymore.” - Lady Gaga

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    anaghamposted 12 years ago

    I believe that it is better to be an independent,working women/girl rather than working hard to be a sweet girl or sugar baby as you said... We still earn a lot of money if we work hard on our own terms when compared to girls who don't have the freedom to have money whenever they want...

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    bituinolayquizanoposted 12 years ago

    I chose to be an independent carreer woman because hard earned money don't go away so easily and your moral is still intact and so was yours self respect and self worth and the others to you as well.
    
    I see a lot of young generation this days always wanting easy escape in easing their financial problem without thinking to the future outcome of their actions and i consider it being irresponsible.

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