Can a man and woman ever truly be just friends?

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   lyricsingrayposted 13 years ago

   Can they?
   
   Or will it always lead to sex if you wait long enough?

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      Cagsilposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      I guess that would be left up to one's perspective about maintaining them to be separate.
      
      Friends being Friends.
      
      Friends, with benefits(no strings attached).
      
      Sometimes, feelings or love, might get in the way, that depends on both individuals. Each has to figure out, whether or not, there is feelings behind the sexual action or not.
      
      It's best known, in advance, so as to no one jumps in with both feet, and ends up hurt.

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         lyricsingrayposted 13 years agoin reply to this

         thank you sir cagsil, good points here

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            Cagsilposted 13 years agoin reply to this

            You're welcome Kim.

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      Lady_Eposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      A man and woman can stay just friends. They just need to know, not to cross the line. When that line is about to be crossed, one of them just needs to step on the brakes.

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      awareposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      when i was married we went to a counselor  185 a hour fee. he said the answer to that ? was no . it pissed my x off so much. lol

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      cosetteposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      men and women can indeed be friends. you can even be a little attracted to each other but out of respect for each other, and the friendship, you just don't go there. i have always gotten along better with men than women anyway...most women don't like me at first. they assume i am stuck up and snotty, and then after they get to know me they're all 'wow, you're so swweeeeet', who knew?'
      
      :p

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      SEGREENposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      Yes I think is't possible.
      I had a friend.. or thought I have a friend until I got married.
      
      He's a christian and a divorcee who vows not to remarry or get in anymore relationship.. We used to see each other on the train in the morning and talk almost 3 times a day.  When I told him I met someone.. he didn't know what to say.. "I didn't know he "really liked me.. he didn't show any interest. We still remain friends but ou calls are few and far between

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      Krystal Blueposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      I think it can happen but it depends on the people involved.

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      starme77posted 13 years agoin reply to this

      Sure they can just as long as neiter one of them in a nymmpho lol

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      Jane@CMposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      No it won't lead to sex, unless you both want it too.  I have good male friends, in fact, I'd rather have men as my friends than women.  Men are just easier to get a long with.

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   lyricsingrayposted 13 years ago

   I don't believe it is possible when you get that close with someone - too much becomes sacred and with trust, love grows in the sexual form.

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      DogSiDaedposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      Quick question, can friends have sex and still be friends? If not, why not?

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   h.a.borcichposted 13 years ago

   Kim,
   
   I have traditionally worked in male dominated jobs and had many men friends who just stayed friends. Some have been very close friends over 15 years now. Even when we were both single we just kept to friendship.
   
   I think it is possible. Holly

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      samsbrposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      I am also think it is possible. i have also some female friends they are also very good and close friends of mine but we both seems our-self as close friends. If you seems the relationship as cheap then god friendship gonna be broken...that is not the good sign for good people I think male and female also just be a good friends

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   Rayalternatelyposted 13 years ago

   "Just Friends" is a term that describes people who'd rather be in each others pants but aren't supposed to be.

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      lyricsingrayposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      very good point ray!

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      advisor4qbposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      I agree with you.

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   ralwusposted 13 years ago

   It depends on who is the opposite sex. I have women friends, real close and no sex, even though it is 'there'. We just do not do it.

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      lyricsingrayposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      But see, it's 'there' is all I was getting at, thanks babe xo

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   maudine_05posted 13 years ago

   yes, its possible. I have male friends for years that we treat each other as siblings and I can't remember any occasion that we thought of having sex.

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   Pacal Votanposted 13 years ago

   Don't even think about it and you'll soon realize that it's possible.

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   Himitsu Shugishaposted 13 years ago

   Add this to the list of questions that may never truly be answered, "What came first, the chicken or the egg?; Why is the sky blue?; And can a man and woman truly be "just friends"?
   
   I really believe that this question can only be answered from the perspective of the parties involved and not on an all encompassing scale.
   
   Speaking strictly from a male point of view, men are typically only friends with women that they find attractive. And most men will respect the friendship label and boundaries associated with it as long as the "woman" wants to keep things on a platonic level. However, the minute she lets her guard down, all bets are off.
   
   However, if a significant amount of time passes and both parties continue to enjoy the friendship (e.g. Jerry/Elaine from Seinfeld type of relationship) then it is possible. The trust will be there, the respect will be there, but unfortunately or fortunately the prospect of sex will always be there as well.

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      Jennifer D.posted 13 years agoin reply to this

      Good points very well put. I have male friends that I would never consider having sex with, although they have brought the subject up before (pun intended). And I have been in relationships with men who have had female friends that they "went there" with.
      When those "friendships" continue, it appears difficult to separate the sex from the friendship; one of them wants more.
      Although I believe that men and women can be friends without having sex, once the deed is done, everything changes.

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   Stevennix2001posted 13 years ago

   yes it is possible to be just friends with a person, regardless of gender.  most girls i meet often already have boyfriends anyway, so im good friends with a lot of them.  so trust me, it can be done.

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    Bovine Currencyposted 13 years ago

    Men and women can be just friends.  After a while, even if there is an attraction if it is not acted on it will just be.  I have a just friends friend, after a few years we tried the benefits thing and it didn't work.  Was almost impossible.  We are still friends and still an attraction but no action.

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    kiwi galposted 13 years ago

    Yes they can be friends. Crossing the line with sex destroys everything.  It changes the friendship to expectations.  Been there done that.  It's not the same after sex, gets complicated.

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    C.V.Rajanposted 13 years ago

    Provided one of them has the least amount of sex appeal to the other.

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    kiwi galposted 13 years ago

    Nice way to think of it.

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    Pr0metheusposted 13 years ago

    Yes.  Do you think married women can't have male friends without sex?  Do you think married men can't have female friends without sex?  It happens all the time.
    
    I think both are well within the bounds of possibility.

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    terrowhiteposted 13 years ago

    yes surely they can be a very good friends for a life time.. I have one friend he is so cool and unederstand me and my situations.. we are friends over 10 years by now..

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    lyricsingrayposted 13 years ago

    so confused! : 

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    poetlorraineposted 13 years ago

    on line friends dont have much choice other than to just stay friends really...

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       lyricsingrayposted 13 years agoin reply to this

       great idea Poet

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    seasoningposted 13 years ago

    i have a special on line friend hope we stay friends forever, but we live a long way from each other

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    sunflower1posted 13 years ago

    NO! They can have a mutually understanding friendship but they can never be just friends.

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       lyricsingrayposted 13 years agoin reply to this

       I can't help but feel the same way. Thanks

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    Richieb799posted 13 years ago

    I think alot of the time there is an attraction there and competition is another thing that gets in the way. Although I have managed to keep a number of good female friends, its just the way humans are.. we have our instincts

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       lyricsingrayposted 13 years agoin reply to this

       Yes, and those instincts are put into practice I believe more often than not.  Then the friendship gets creepy and weird and slowly dissolves.  Unless of course you stay together as a couple but I don't see that too often, that's just me.

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    Mezoposted 13 years ago

    hi, in my opinion.....they can't be just friends.....look it doesn't necessary lead to sex....but are u telling me that none of them will ever have fantasies about their "close friend"?
    
    think of (Friends) the show...!
    i totally agree with "Himitsu Shugisha"....and do u remember the episode were elen recorded her vioce during jerry's show?

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       Bovine Currencyposted 13 years agoin reply to this

       That is not specific to men and women.  I have fantasies about men and women and some of them I often wonder why they are in my fantasies anyway.  Maybe thats just me.  I am quite the deviant...

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          lyricsingrayposted 13 years agoin reply to this

          deviant but smart I say xo

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             Bovine Currencyposted 13 years agoin reply to this

             Oooer.  I never saw that before.  I like hugs and kisses xo

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    prettydarkhorseposted 13 years ago

    i think it is possible, but rare though, they always succumb to emotional then physical attachments!

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    Millionheirposted 13 years ago

    I don't think so, strictly speaking from a woman's point of view. When a woman discovers she has a special bond or relationship with her male friend then naturally she is going to grow feelings for him. In general in relationships the effort is never equal, there is usually someone who gives more than the other, feels more than the other, or wants more than the other. Often times, for the sake of the friendship it remains concealed. This is assuming a straight male and female relationship if you have a straight/gay relationship it is entirely a different ball park.

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    bojanglesk8posted 13 years ago

    If one or both is not ugly it will always lead to sex.

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       tantrumposted 13 years agoin reply to this

       How old are you ?
       What a stupid remark !
       

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    Black Lillyposted 13 years ago

    I think you can pretend you are friends. Talk like friends, act like friends, help each other, etc, BUT.
    Both think about "what if" (there may be exceptions - e.g. frigidity issues, etc).
    That "what if" sets all going, until even the air around starts vibrating - all you need is some possibility, an excuse to get closer, be it a bad day or too much wine (vulnerability).
    IF the other party then turns it down and refuses to get closer, you can pretend to be friends. Until the next time...
    
    Question: is this ONLY friendship?

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    mega1posted 13 years ago

    Can ANYONE just be friends?  Isn't there always some ulterior motive, if not sex, money, status, image, just relieving boredom?

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    Leta Sposted 13 years ago

    Trust me, yes.  A woman can have male friends for years and it can only ever be that.  It can be either (usually, in my experience), a guy who >may< be a little attracted to you and you have absolutely no interest in and never would have interest in, though you care about him as a person...like my friends J., H., B., and a few more...  OR, there may be a slight attraction mutually (this is rarer), but not much, or they may be in another relationship, etc., and neither of you would ever act on it. 
    
    Absolutely.  Everything is a choice, after all.

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       Himitsu Shugishaposted 13 years agoin reply to this

       Wow, I hope "J", "H" and "B" aren't reading this, it may change the nature of your friendship.

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          Leta Sposted 13 years agoin reply to this

          Na!  They already know the score.  It's the substitute 'girlfriend' thing with a couple of them.  And I always listen to all their women stories and woes, too.

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    lyricsingrayposted 13 years ago

    seems like it's split down the middle from feedback. I m a littles urprised, but then I always think I'm right

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       Cagsilposted 13 years agoin reply to this

       

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          lyricsingrayposted 13 years agoin reply to this

          

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             Cagsilposted 13 years agoin reply to this

             Hi Kim,
             
             Are you having fun yet?

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                lyricsingrayposted 13 years agoin reply to this

                always and you?/

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    Cagsilposted 13 years ago

    working on it

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    wrenfrost56posted 13 years ago

    Yes, I think they can. I have many male friends and sex is not an issue. We just don't view each other in that way.

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    I*n*v*i*c*t*u*sposted 13 years ago

    Yes, I believe so...

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    mega1posted 13 years ago

    just to be argumentative - might it have something to do with 1)age and 2)looks?

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    mega1posted 13 years ago

    because for the last 30 years I haven't had much of a prob staying "just friends" with most men!

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    rebekahELLEposted 13 years ago

    yes, but I don't know about if you've been in an intimate relationship with them first if it's really possible.  the sexual tension is always there. I have tried, it doesn't seem to work.
    
    I have male friends and we are able to talk about subjects of substance without a lot of judgments being made. I like a lot of guy stuff that my women friends aren't too interested in, like music, composing, artsy stuff, philosophical things...

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    donotfearposted 13 years ago

    I believe so. I've had many male friends that I used to hang out with, but had no intimate relationship.  Why spoil a good friendship?  Unless the chemistry is there for more, of course. As a matter of fact, my favorite male friend, Pat, died 3 years ago & I think about him every day. I regret that I didn't invite him over for dinner with me and spousey. Even spousey liked him & understood the friendship. He was no threat. So yes, male/female can be just friends.

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    Poppa Bluesposted 13 years ago

    Nope. Not unless he's gay.

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       Cagsilposted 13 years agoin reply to this

       This proves you don't understand Life. It also shows you don't understand the basic needs of a woman. Sorry, but your statement simply proves.
       
       Thank you.

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          Poppa Bluesposted 13 years agoin reply to this

          I beg to differ. There is always an underlying sexula component in any relationship between a man and a woman...always! That doesn't mean that they can't be friends, but there is always that tension and if there is significan others involved, they can further complicate and make difficult a real friendship... sorry...but that's just the way it is.

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    habeeposted 13 years ago

    Sure they can - as long as the guy is gay! lol. Just kidding. I've had close male friends for years, and sex is never even thought about. On the other hand, I have another male friend with whom there is a mutual sexual attraction. We tease about it a lot but have never acted on it, nor do I think we ever will.

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    prettydarkhorseposted 13 years ago

    friends with benefits or friends in love

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    torimariposted 13 years ago

    I have many straight and gay male friends. One has been friends with me for 12-15 years and the other 8 years.
    
    Both mentioned are straight if that means anything. We hang alone, go to movies, concerts, etc. and there never is an issue. I'm just not attracted to them sexually.
    
    I also have guy friends I could see me dating. I like the idea of being friends first and than it developing into something more, but I also like having male friends that are only friends.
    
    For me atleast, it is totally possible.

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    lyricsingrayposted 13 years ago

    We all experience different relationships I know,but maybe it's just me, I've always had close male friends and lost them after it got intimate on various levels.  Doesn't have to be sex but most times it is. 
    
    Someone mentioned tension and it is that feeling I believe mostly overpowers the boundaries of strictly being friends :

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    Pearldiverposted 13 years ago

    Absolutely
    
    Maybe
    
    Ummmm...

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       lyricsingrayposted 13 years agoin reply to this

       see PD I'd have to get intimate with you cause your just one of those guys who is a great friend - we're safe miles apart, still nice to think about you being a warrior and all xo

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    poetlorraineposted 13 years ago

    we like to think so eh

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    RossMcposted 13 years ago

    I hate the word "Just"... often "just" friends is much deeper and dependable than what we would label a relation of marriage. 
    
    Sexual tension or attraction between "just" friends can exist, but first of all you don't have to act on any impulse (if you do it won't take long to find yourself behind bars) and secondly when "just" friends do figure out they want to be really involved with each other their love affair has the most solid ground I can think of.
    
    So, when I marry I would like it to be with a "just" friend.... :-)

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    lyricsingrayposted 13 years ago

    I suppose we all have different experiences, I just can't see it not forming to an intimate level, having shared so much already, that love doesn't enter the picture.
    
    Yet sex certainly often does
    

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