how often do you catch men staring at your chest? it's like i can't get through one day with out some guy staring at my chest. the other day i went into a bank and the manager himself could not look me in the eye. i'm getting fed up with this. my breasts are big but still they should have respect enough to not stare or make it obvious that they are. i wonder do women with small breasts have the same problem? if not i might consider getting a reduction.
Do you dress to conceal them or to flaunt them? That may be part of it. I'm sure if I walked around with half of my penis showing, women would look...
i have social phobias and hide as much as i can. i always try blending in with the back ground but still for some reason you men single me out. if you were showing your penis i'm sure that you would be the only one looking.
Ive worn the clothing equivalent to a paper bag. I promise you, men are more interested in boobs, then women are in dicks. In general. like, visualy in public.
That may be true...but my point is, women dress to draw male attention to the breast, why are some surprised when it works?
If 98% of women walk around with half of their breasts exposed why is it surprising that men look at the area of the breast? (and even as we talk about this your avatar is a profile that highlights your breasts... )
sure, look at my pic right now? think that was an accident?
but there are plenty of women who DO NOT dress for attention, and get it anyway.
Because men are programmed by the 98% that are looking for attention.
I think its far more genetic than "programmed." And, I may get jumped on for saying that. But, I also believe that either way, its something that can be controlled, and SHOULD be in the context of polite society. I might inadvertantly glance, out of suprise, if a guy was walking around with his penis out, but I wouldn't outright stare. (And, I might not... doesn't really interest me... In general, men are much more visually stimulated than women.) So, lets go to something that isn't sexual to illustrate a point.
If someone has a disfigurement, a scar, or even a big smudge of jelly on their face, we may see it, and "look" at first, but we've learned that to be polite, we don't stare. Why is it different with breasts?
I would outright stare.
and how many women have thier tits 'right out', in a normal public setting?
I assume Mikel is refering to low cut shirts and such, not to actual naked jiggling jubblies.
Most if not deep cleavage, then it is form fitting clothing...
OK!!!!!!
sorry
I was trying to see it from the other persons point of view, but its hard with this tight shirt on....
yeah....
that stinks huh?
why cant men think? like, if a woman is clearly not enjoying the attention..like..it IS clear..why DO they still look?
Its an honest question, not attacky and all..I realy do wonder about that. Im well aware that LOTS of women DO want attention and it can be confusing, but...really, some peopel are just trying to get thier groceries.
Why do some women refuse to take no for an answer? I have been on that side of the coin most of my life. I am not one of these guys that has no self control, but I have had to take my share and then some of the harassment from women that would not take no for an answer... should I get on here and complain that all women are pigs?
Why do women think it is ok for them to hit a man who has just been caught cheating on them, but it is not ok for a man to hit a woman caught doing the same thing?
Why is ok for a woman to vandalize a man's possessions but when a man does it he goes to jail?
for every example of a man being less than what you want men to be, I can point out an example of women not being everything they claim to be, or should be...
People are not perfect... that is a fact of life. Dealing with Your phobia, is something you have to deal with, you can't expect the world to be something other than what it is out of convience for you...it just can't work that way.
My Humble Opinion.
{another reason why men look is because our looking lets you know that we are interested, the response we get is what decides our next action.}
ya know what?
men and women are all people
life is hard no matter how ya slice it
I have had an awful day and am not really making tons of sense right now
Im sorry any woman was ever a jerk to you, so far as I can tell, you didnt deserve it.
Ill be back some other day to rationally discuss rational things, Mr Mike G. I do hope you know anything I said was not directed at YOU but..just men ...as your a man and seemed willing to disclose manly secrets at the time.
have a good night and sorry iIconfusingly flaunted my tits, but feel free to look a them, for today only.
justine i'm sure if that pic is you then you are an eye magnet,huh?
as we dialed the police and the psychiatric unit. It is a funny double standard.
You cannot control men looking at your breasts, but you can control your reaction to it. Why does it bother you so much? Just relax and enjoy it. Someday when you're older and it doesn't happen so often, you might miss it!
i have social phobias and ptsd from being held captive when i was 7. the attentions of men wether physical or visual make me ill to my stomach. i can and will never enjoy it. i wish i could be a free spirit and not let these things bother me. but until i can safely go somewhere without guys oogling me i doubt i'll ever be able to. maybe i should get a reduction and develope terrets...lol
that could be fun.
I am a little concerned that you open yourself up for the exact kind of attention you say you don't want - this is not the place to expect an intellectual discussion about this. What are you wanting here?
Well, that's different and I can understand your anxiety. Perhaps a reduction would help. I know someone who had it done and she is much more comfortable with herself now.
You'll never be able to stop from from oogling at you, though. It's what they do.
terrets..its THE way to go say WHATEVER you want, vulgar as all get out..and then..what? I have terrets? minus the twitches, of course....
I'm sorry to hear about your social anxiety issues, Lecie. I also have some social anxiety problems, though not nearly as acute as yours. I've found that no matter what I wear, I get some sort of unwanted staring from men. I even had a sweater I bought specifically because it was 1) kind of baggy, 2) not transparent in any way, and 3) of a thick, curve hiding material. Didn't matter. Still had some doorknob barista stare while I stood in line next to my boyfriend.
Some men are just pigs, and the best a woman with severe social anxiety problems can do is breath, ignore, and walk away. A reduction may help, but one woman I know with similar problems didn't feel any better afterwards. One girl I knew used to wear false eyelashes in neon colors, making people stare there instead of her chest. I don't know if it helped, but she certainly thought so
Im sorry youguys have such beign inpublic sadness.
neon eylashes sounds pretty cool.
I don't believe it is nearly as bad as Lecie's troubles, but being uncomfortable in social settings is bad enough. Having some dude drool over you while you are already uncomfortable makes it even worse.
I have four brothers, and every girl they have dated has commented to either my mother or myself about how they *don't* stare. So I know it is possible! It is just the jerks who lack self control that do it. A glance is okay, I can deal with that. But prolonged eye contact... very aggravating! Okay, my ranting is over. Back to de-spamming!
ha ha
despamming, you got your hands full!! You guys really do have all my respect, can't be any easy job at all. Its nice to have a "personal" kinda comment now and then though. thanks.
trust me, I soooo "get" the social anxiety thing. Im just more over it then I used to be. reduction is not the way to go unelss your actually in pain.
well i don't think anyone stares. i thought she was talking about the glances. once you become sensitve to this the glances would or might seem like stares
Pretty Panther -
Why does it bother us so much?
BECAUSE WE HAVE BRAINS!!
Please look into my eyes with as much intensity as you look at my chest, look into my eyes with love instead of lust & desire for sex. Why is it possible for some men to love while others are only in it for sex? Is that all men want from women? I want to be acknowledged for having a brain, for having feelings, for knowing how to, for being capable, for being human.
I am sick and tired of being an object men so willingly use for their own sexual pleasure!!
Maybe, just maybe, us women should stare into a man's crotch - wondering....is it really big? Thick? Maybe it's really, really long.
But then again, women don't have the need to demoralize men by only thinking of them in terms of what they can do in bed.
Maybe, just maybe, us women should stare into a man's crotch - wondering....is it really big? Thick? Maybe it's really, really long.
IT"S ABOUT TIME!!!
of course, you wouldn't say that if you knew what it felt like to be demoralized, or if you had only been the object of sexual attention for your entire life.
but i HAVE been the object of sexual attention all my life....
(woman have turned their active attention to assuring they do not have sex with me)
so you are saying that even though you are a man no-one knows you have a brain? puhleeze!!
if women assure they don't have sex with you then you have the opposite problem....
no.. i am a married man!!
but i am shocked by your forwardness!!
is that an ethnic slur because I am Greek?
are you accusing me of discrimination because I'm American?
um, okay, didn't realize Greek meant backwards (?)......thought Greek was quite a bit more 'progressive'
So, you're married?!?! Stop flirting! asking me if I was asking you out...sheesh!
how come the reply tab is disappearing? lol
nice GreekOne, but sorry. Not Interested!
As a male I will say this, it is how some males are brought up, some are brought up to respect women and some (wandering eye) males are not bought up with any respect for women, I myself like the eye contact. However lets be honest some women, and there are some in this forum use the old standby "SEX SELLS" to get there point across, to sell products; to get your attention, and plain out right want to be noticed.
Lecie I can understand how you feel, but please try to remember, the men who look into your eyes, respect you, the ones who have wandering eyes only care about themselves, and do not deserve the time of day. Do not let people make you feel uncomfortable about who you are or your body, you are beautiful. Just keep you head up, and keep doing your thing, God Bless you, and be strong.
wow, im sorry to hear that lecie. well i think it's sad that most men do that. trust me, even if you did get a breast reduction, most guys would probably stare at something else like your butt or something. however, rest assured not all men are like that. in fact, when i used to work at dillards, i was the only straight male employee there that didn't hit on every female customer. where as the other guys did. of course, i got ridiculed and got my sexuality called into question over it, but i never cared about that as i was a bit of a nerd in high school. therefore, im used to people talking bad about me. lol. however, i'm still sorry to hear you went through that though.
@justine76
well i don't know why your husband doesn't look at you, but if that's how you still look now in your avatar, then i think your husband is a very lucky guy to have a wife that's both beautiful and smart.
thanks? hes busy looking at everybody else is all...its natural ya know? its how men are wired... see previous posts...
yeah, i did. however, i don't think you can say ALL men are like that. obviously most are. however, i can't speak for every guy in the room, but i always found the most attractive thing about a girl is her personality if you ask me. don't get me wrong, pretty girls are nice to look at and easy on the eyes. however, if the girl is a b**ch and/or a bimbo, then I wouldn't date her or be interested in her. plus, if i was that bank employee lecie talked to, i would just focus on my job, as im very focused when it comes to work. therefore, i don't think it's fair to say all men are like that. although i do agree that all men usually rely on visual stimulation and most do often stare. however, speaking solely for myself, i try to never stare at a girl's body when talking to them at all. sure, i may glance at them a few times when i see one pass by that's pretty. however, i would NEVER stare at her cleavage or her body when talking to her, as that would be disrespectful. however, that's just me.
eta: plus, im always scared of getting fired at jobs, so i would be too much of wimp to do what that guy did to lecie. not that i agree with it, but just saying. lol.
thanks for sharing who you are!! Im so sure your going to find a perfect girl who deserves all that someday!!
ps, I didnt mean to sound like I think ALL men are like that, its just what he told me after telling me he fanatisizes about having sex wih nearly every woman he sees..."its how men are wired. deal with it."
oh no, i completely understand. i didn't think much of it to be honest. however, i appreciate you clearing that up though. im sure mikel has his reasons for saying that. i can see what he's saying to some degree about what women wear can attract a man's attention. however, i do think that all men can use self control when addressing a lady. i mean, just because your little head tells you something, doesn't mean you have to listen to it if you catch my drift? lol.
oh sorry. i guess i misread then. sorry mikel if your reading this. lol. anyway, im sorry your husband feels that way. although im sure he's a great guy, but i can't say i agree though. i think it depends on the guy. if he has a great deal of self control then he can still show attraction for a girl without being disrespectful to her. however, some men tend to listen to their little head more so than their big ones if you catch my drift.
yeah..
I just wanted to make sure everyone knew I didnt mean Mikel, so far as I can tell hes a good guy.
im outta here before anytign else goes wrong..
no, you don't have to leave. its my fault. i misread and mistyped the last post. you didn't do anything wrong. im sorry to you and mickel.
im just saying...ive said what i had to say.
oh okay. for a minute there, i was affraid i offended ya or said something wrong. lol.
lol...I'm always getting blamed for something
lol
well, i apologize man for the misunderstanding. are we cool? lol. if it makes you feel better, im always being blamed for things too, if it's any consolation.
it's attractive! get it? it's the way we're wired it's not meant to be offensive or annoying. and how do you not see whats right in front of you. i guess the real question is what if no one ever looked, huh?
Exactly! Yeah, the big busty babes should continue to flaunt that stuff while we stare & drool; we'll just ignore their feign complaints, and continue as we were. Ha-ha!
i would finally feel safe if no one ever looked. i rarely ever go out anymore because when i do men surrond me and stare. even though i wear the baggiest clothes i can find. i also never wear make-up and try only looking at the ground.
wow! whew!do ya have a boyfriend? you have peaked my interest now, and this is uncomfortable for you huh?ya know if you learn to harness this you can become famous
no i don't have a boyfriend and the only way i want to be famous is through my children's books. i want to give kids a way to escape the harsh reality of their lives if even for a short time. i never had that when i was a kid. the only books i had to read were for school. my parents had too many kids, too little time and too little money. if i finally get my book published i'll probably stop going out all together and just pay people to do my errands.
Those things must be whoppers! I got it! Before you get a reduction, contact an erotic supply store; have them big boobs of yours cast molded into a synthetic, realistic torso and/or sex doll...and they can sell it for loads of cash. That way, you can retire and also have plenty of extra money for the medical bills - due to your reduction. LOL!
I'm inclined to believe this is not entirely disrespect. It's part instinct. We're men. And yes, sometimes we are animals no matter how hard we try to not be.
I guess I have a follow up interesting question for the ladies that really irks me. Why are the first couple of questions of a guy are how much money does he make or what he does for a living?
Can't you just accept me for me?
I know. It DOES sound silly, doesn't it. Keep that in mind.
oh man you hit the nail on the head. that is the tackiest question and an immediate turn off to me.you can meet somebody and you are just laughing and having a good time and the first thing out of there mouth is so, what do you do? it's like a job interview for laughter but also lets you know they want to know how much money you have that they can get at! you are right! tacky,tacky,tacky
I'm not sure why men are so obsessed with breasts, I personally am not, though they are in close proximity to the face and they did play an early role in nurturing us as babies and they are a part of foreplay leading up to sexual gratification.
The question might be why does having anyone staring at your breasts bother you? Why wouldn't you be proud that your breasts would garner such attention? If it bothers you that much, I would suggest you simple embarrass the culprit by exclaiming loudly "Hey I'm up here!" and pointing to your face.
lmao...great advice. let me ask you...lets say for instance you are the guy and i say that to you. how would you react to that? just curious because i don't want to try that if the guy might start some kind of fight or something. after all this happens in public places like banks or grocery stores.
they are usally embaressed and walk off
maybe they would try to say they werent looking
not many guys are about to fight with a woman in public.
My guess is most people would blush with embarrassment and I doubt anyone would get in a fight over it! Let me know how that works for you!
I honestly don't think that men are aware that they are staring much like a little kids being momentarily awestruck by something either beautiful or repulsive. It's human nature to sneak a peek at both extremes.
They really don't realize how obvious they are being while looking at you.
In America both women and men are obsessed with breast.
It's probably still the number one plastic surgery requested and in most instances it's the woman's idea to increase her breast size.
There is no comparison between looking at breast and a penis.
Breast are not sex organs!
A better comparison would be a woman staring at a man's chest, shoulders, or his 6 pack stomach.
Both sexes have body parts they admire in the other.
Attraction or being hit on is only "offensive" if the person attracted to us is not someone we're interested in.
Since we have no control over what others think or reasons they are attracted to us it's a waste of time get caught up in that mess.
Besides as you age there will be less eyes peering at you.
In America getting "older " is a turn off! ha ha ha
Men are considered as"Dirty old men"
Women are considered as "Old hags"
In other words if you hate the opposite sex staring at you...trust me it's not going to always be that way!
(It also explains why there are so many lotions and creams promising to remove or hide wrinkles, age spots, cellulite, crows feet...etc along with botox shots, brow lifts, removing fat from turkey necks, unsightly veins..etc)
If getting old or fat were considered sexy in this country most of these products wouldn't make a dime.
Imagine yourself as being a beautiful model, movie star or some other famous person. Everywhere these people go others are staring at them, taking their photos, and fantasizing about them.
They learn to enjoy the attentiion realizing it's "fleeting" or they learn to ignore it and focus on what they want in the moment.
Bottom line is we have no control over what someone looks at or thinks about us. The only person we have control of is ourselves.
Don't let someone else control your emotions or reactions.
Most of us enjoy turning heads or being considered attractive or sexy.
We just want others to know there is more to us.
Sometimes I stare at womens breast, not be perverted but sometimes just because they are too big to look away. lol
More like amazement and sometime a lil' jealousy.
i think the size of a woman's chest is over-rated...
I'm more of a face man myself
Definitely so but I think there is a bit of a "maternal" jealousy that makes us subconsciously a wee bit jealous, not that breast size has anything to do with it but still... lol
Good to know you are a face man yourself.
Very often, and I love it
A reduction? No way! It's like driving a Ferrari, you wouldn't change your Ferrari for a Peugeot. Would you?
I'm glad you shared the photo with us! :-)
Both sexes are guilty of taking more interest in what they don't have than what they do have.
I suppose it's human nature to place more value on something that's new to us. A while back I wrote a blog asking "Do we save our best for the beginnings?"
Fortunately these things run in cycles and I'm certain your husband is still checking you out without being too obvious!
i already have social phobias and the constant staring is making it harder for me to overcome them.
oh my god - Mikel, how rude can you get? someone states that they have social phobias and you insinuate that they are flaunting their breasts? I've run into the same thing - the staring, and I wear very baggy clothes, I have since I was young and in high school and started developing these things. I don't appreciate it. I don't think its funny. I don't think some men will ever understand that their groping stares are unwelcome! and it doesn't have anything to do with how we are open about sex and flirt and all that. but, on the other hand, expecting a gentle, kind exchange on this subject in these forums is probably kind of unrealistic.
OMG, actually her statement of having social phobias came as I was writing my initial statement. Which was a question actually... but you go ahead and get self righteous and call me rude all you want. (which is very rude BTW.)
thanks so much for the post. i really just wanted to make sure that i was not alone in thinking the staring is unwelcome.
In my experience, the amount of stares are about the same, big or small. Wearing clothing that fits properly, making one a complete package from head to toe, is the best way I have found to get one to notice your face, above your assets.
thanks for the advice. i'll try that before the reduction and terrets.lol
I, myself have difficulty not checking out breasts. However that may sound, its true. But i think women have beautiful bodies and so I admire them. Not in a sexual way though. But I do understand why men are attracted to our breasts. and I don't feel weird or strange or uncomfortable by that kind of attention. I learned long ago how to use that to my advantage
Lecie - By the way, as this is your thread. I'm sorry for what you've had to go through. I won't get into "counseling, help, blah, blah" but, I do hope you have a better support group than us! Like Mega said, we can be great to talk to, or not so much. Be careful. Its easy to get some sensitive places stepped on in the forums.
OK, I will never stare at your bewbies again. Can I look up your dress?
I never seem to catch em looking at my chest. Maybe it's not an eye catcher! Ha....what I do catch em looking at is my butt!
Well, my twins are so "out there," guys are always staring at them. I'm used to it. I don't think all of the lookers are lusting - I think maybe some are trying to figure out:
a. Does she have balloons stuffed in her shirt?
b. Is this a joke?
c. Am I on Candid Camera?
d. Does she get two black eyes when she jumps rope?
running = black eyes
just to end any confusion.
Also, I have heard it said that men who stare at boobs never totally got weaned from the breast when they were babies so you could feel sorry for them - don't get a reduction - it will hurt you a lot more than them.
Honestly, I don't mind if they look it is a natural instinct I just smile and go about my business. We as women look at derriere's , chests, arms, teeth whatever floats our boat so it in no way offends me when a man looks at me and my girls. When I am 90 you can bet your bippy they will not look then! so let them enjoy the scenery and just relax. If they don't look you should be a little concerned.
I was going to post a reply to this, but I forgot what it was. Some chick with a nice set of duffel bags just walked by..
...wait...
...ok, she's gone. Now what were we talking about?
Oh, sweater huggers, that's right.. Really, it's just instinct to look at a nice pair of blouse clowns, the same way it is when a chick checks out a guys body. I mean, really, everyone judges another based on something, whether it's a chicks silicone implanted bolt ons or a guys steroid hyped six-pack.
Seriously now, a lot of chicks think guys are lookin' when they really aren't. There are perverts out there, true, but a lot of times it's more innocent than one may think. Other times, chicks wear clothing that just invite those mischievous stares.
My thought, if you don't like it, just say somethin' and be done with it. Letting things like that worry ya won't add another single day to your life.
Now.. gotta run, I gotta go find that chick with the nice double lotus peaks ..
I think that all men look at all women from head to toe and settle on one of her assets to focus in on- if you have a nice rear end, they may look you in the eyes while speaking to you, but focus in on your tush as you walk away from them.
I think women with smaller breasts have the same problem (if they have any sort of breast/most men want to see them...)
"once you've seen one set of boobs, you want to see the rest of them"
something some comedian siad and hubby fully agrees.
Exactly!
Does not matter if they are 90 years old and have to be rolled up when getting dressed- for some reasons, guys want to see them???
(the comedian is Ron White/from the Blue Collar Comedy Tour, I think?)
I have teens so I get to be around lots of teen boys and I think it's genetic. Puberty hits and they start staring. Even at me and I'm like ancient to them.
its sooner then that!!! I had a kid who was 6 grab mine! I do really think boys/men/guys like boobies
and its not on purpose to be nasty. But SOME of them could learn how to "peek" rather then STARE
and Im not talking about the girls who are flaunting them, Im well aware that some girls parade them around and then get all.."hmmmmph, what are YOU looking at?"
the OP was talking aobut a woman who does not want to be looked at, is not dressed in a way to provoke oogling, but it still happens. My guess is...some guys are rude. Some guys arent looking but becuase the woman is self-conciouss she thinks they are. Some guys simply think the girl is pretty, and its taken the wrong way. Life is wierd, and people are wierder.
I agree. I feel sorry for the males actually. I know at the highschools the girls are half naked except during hoodie season and if the boys look they are sexually harassing.
I thought it was funny when I got the handbook for my daughters' old highschool. It clearly said no low cut shirts. All the shirts were low cut. I figured the school gave up and next year it will just say "no exposed nipples"
I don't know what the OP can do. Just realise it's not personal. And probably not on purpose.
It depends on who's doing it too. Some guys are very creepy about it.
oh by the way, i read a hub a while back about how boobs contain gravitational pull which makes eyes attracted to them. idk if that's true, but that's what one hubber wrote about here. lol.
lol...i really enjoyed all the chat here. i posted to try boosting my courage in face to face encounters. i made up my mind, that the next time i catch a guys eye doing the gravitational pull, i will kindly point out that they are being disrespectful and i don't like it.
it was nice hearing all of your opinions and thoughts on the subject.
i saw a tshirt once, it said..tell youy boobs to stop making eye contact with me
lol...that would probably be the wrong shirt for me to wear. as i'm sure it's intent is to draw attention. but it did make me laugh.
how can we possibly see what the real issue is if we don't see the offending breasts in question??
Welll I'm very petite and I'm afraid the male species still cannot help but look, so I'm urging you not to get that boob reduction - it would be a waste of time methinks. Maybe the solution is just to change your attitude towards the whole situation and start loving all the attention rather than hating it!
I see the boob thread is still going strong.
SARCASM:
"I believe we women oughtta be able to express ourselves any way we want...if we wanna flaunt it, we can, & if they wanna look, good. But don't come on to me or I'll file a discrimination suit against ya!"
As a man I can honestly say that I find it very hard not to look, especialy if they are half exposed or very shapely..
But i don't stare while I am talking to the lady in question or while I am listening to them.. Everyone glances at the others body, staring however would indicate that the guy is either a total perv or that he was totaly bored and dropping off into a dream world.. In either case an old friend of mine with "huge" boobs used to just shake them and cough if a man's eyes wandered off for too long... this usually resulted in a red face on the mans part and far more co-operation with regard to whatever it was she was after!
Don't worry about them, don't be shy of them.. Other people's reactions are their problems don't make them yours!
I will agree here, i don't go out on a mission to grasp a look at any half-out breast set, but women who are "proud" of what they have to offer DO tend to have them on show, a good shot of cleavage at least. It is sometimes hard not to notice it and look, but it's when the medusa style stare kicks in that it passes the point of common decency. fair enough your going to "notice" the show, but there is an amount of time that becomes uneccessary to continue the viewing.
I do feel that women dress in such ways as to show thier assets, as a man would with his muscular statures.. eg t shirt or tight top.
So... who are we to say anything?!
i really have to give thanks to all of the men here for their honesty on this subject. i also want to say that i'm not pointing the finger at any of you as i'm sure you're all nice guys. just the ones in my town seem to be the worst. i wanted to know if it was just me or if other women had the same problem. i think us ladies need to give you guys a big round of applause for your honesty.
Honesty?...
Ok...
Here is honesty, I feel I have a right to look at anything my eyes can see. If it is in public, I have a Right to look at it.
Being a decent man, a man that wants to be polite I choose to look politely and stop looking when I think it becomes something rude.
That someone else seems to think that they get to decide what I can and cannot 'Look' at is a form of facism. Touching is one thing, looking is quite another.
If you dress like eye candy, expect to be treated like eye candy.
My Humble Honest Opinion.
I believe according to Donny Baker, it is state law to look!
Lecie, sorry to hear about your phobia. I wouldn't waste my time or money on a reduction unless you absolutely want one, because guys are going to look at you whether you have a big chest or a small one. It's just the way they are and they really have no way of knowing who wants to be ogled and who doesn't. It's not only the chest that attracts attention, guys like butts, legs, hair, pick a body part and some guy out there will be rude and stare at it.
I have long red hair and men have gone so far at to shout out of passing car windows "is the carpet the same color as"... well you get it. It's forever attracting both positive as well as negative attention.
My oldest daughter is 6'1" and very attractive. She has very long legs, and one afternoon when we were walking to our car parked in the mall parking lot, two men approched her and one of them said in a very rude manner, "I bet it takes you forever to shave them legs."
Some men feel they can get away with these things because somewhere someone in their past once said it was OK to treat women as objects. Of course while outwardly in our current policitally correct society this is no longer acceptable, in practice however, many men will continue to objectify women. It's just a fact of life when they let the little head do their thinking for them.
Spend your time and resources working on your phobia, it might help make the attention less painful for you. A good therapist is worth a hundred body part augmentations.
i'm sorry these things happen to you and your daughter. you are right most men do see us as objects. my insurance doesn't cover a good therapist and i can't afford $500 an hour for one either. so i'm starting to use my work as my therapy. i also have been trying to get bolder on the internet by posting topics like this. hopefully it can help me to better handle these kind of situtations in a face to face encounter. or rather a face to chest encounter.lol
Personally I really don't care one way how and why any stranger looks at me... (I stopped caring since high school!)... I actually don't have the time or energy to give it a second thought!
Just take it in your stride Lecie, hold your head high and if anything, consider it a compliment....
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