What do you think of sex on first date?

1. 37

   katarinaphangposted 13 years ago

   When do you think it's the right time to have sex?  3rd date?  10th date?  Commitment?  Marriage?  Depends...?

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      Rod Marsdenposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      Depends sounds about right. Sex on the first day isn't very likely.

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      pisean282311posted 13 years agoin reply to this

      personally i am not for that idea..

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      teairramarrieposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      hi, look i'm not an expert when it comes to these things but don't give it in your 1st date...
      

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   4. 64

      Ben Evansposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      I think you have to ask why you want to have sex on the first date.
      
      If you just enjoy having sex and that is what you would like to do, then I would say go ahead and enjoy it.  Have fun and know that there is not likely to be a second.  Maybe there will but not likely.  You and your date already decided what was most important which was sex.
      
      If you want to have it because someone would expect it and you really dont want to do it, then dont.  Easy as that.  In fact stay away from these type of men.......The longetivity of the relationship will be short.  There are also a bevy of things that go with short-term frequent sex/
      
      
      So the bottom line is if it is exciting and that is what you want.......ie sex not a relationship, go ahead.  If you want more than one date and you like ther person, then dont. 
      
         I think often we think about an unwritten sexual protocol.......Rules of engagement if you will.  All I can say is follow your own rules. 
      
      I think the quality of my relationship is far more important than sex but that is me and that would be my personal choice.

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   5. 61

      qwarkposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      After I was divorced in my mid 30's, my favorite dates were 1 night stands.
      If the chemistry is there, what's wrong with bringing joy and satisfaction to both on the first date?
      I loved the ladies, I loved consensual sex, I loved the animal passion of 2 bodies locked in wild, hot, crazy and delicious sex!
      I can find nothing wrong with that.

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         Greek Oneposted 13 years agoin reply to this

         i disagree with the need to bring pleasure to the other person.

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            qwarkposted 13 years agoin reply to this

            I always want my date to orgasm as many times as she can b4 I do..
            Those are her responsiblity.
            I will perform until she says lets finish together...oh yes!!!

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2. 69

   Pearldiverposted 13 years ago

   You're asking guys this question?
   
   As a guy I would have to say.... It depends on the date

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      rebekahELLEposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      as a girl, I would have to say 'no'.  I have, but I won't any longer. too many crazies. and I agree with one of the posters, why make it so easy? 

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      1. 69

         Pearldiverposted 13 years agoin reply to this

         All Crazies aside..... For a Scorpio It's far more fun getting to know your date before jumping eachother.
         
         Besides... Why let a girl think she's in charge
         If you know you're a good catch.... Make them work harder

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            katarinaphangposted 13 years agoin reply to this

            You still can make them work harder when they are addicted to you.  There's a bunch of ways to do it...ask the expert.

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   2. 37

      katarinaphangposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      Both guys and girls.

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3. 79

   kirstenblogposted 13 years ago

   Depends is right.....
   
   What about a relationship of many many months online, then the first meeting and you can barely get through the front door before pulling each others cloths off in a fit of passion......
   
   Technically thats the first date but it sounds good to me

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      Pearldiverposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      Yummmmmmmm..... With or Without Virus Protection?

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         kirstenblogposted 13 years agoin reply to this

         
         where can I get cyber condoms?

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            pisean282311posted 13 years agoin reply to this

            

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   2. 37

      katarinaphangposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      Yeah that happened to me a few times before I met my husband.

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4. 73

   myownworldposted 13 years ago

   I agree, dating has moved onto a whole new level altogether, what with online communication, skype etc. Even before a proper 'date' in person,  lots of people these days have already moved through that initial awkward stage because of web cams. Not saying, it's the same as meeting in person, but just that if one's relationship has progressed for a certain time already online, then when you do meet in real life (and there are no rude shocks!) it's not very hard to get physical with each other the very first time.
   
   Not saying it's right or wrong either way, but just that it happens...

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5. 59

   calvindoyleposted 13 years ago

   For me it's ok at first date.Also it depends upon your partner.

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      teairramarrieposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      I don't think so...
      for me it's just not right..

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         katarinaphangposted 13 years agoin reply to this

         sometimes it can feel right, again that depends on the persons and circumstances.  It felt so right between me and my husband and we never left each other ever since (well, apart from when we broke up last year).

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6. 62

   teairramarrieposted 13 years ago

   It's dating...it's supposed to be romantic.....right?

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      katarinaphangposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      yup...and/or lusty when the person and mood are right.

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7. 0

   sarahsherlockposted 13 years ago

   I wouldn't on the 1st date. Men tend to lose interest quickly if there is no chase involved.

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   1. 37

      katarinaphangposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      They can lose interest when there is no sex too.  So maybe it's not the sex.  He's just not that into us.

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8. 50

   BereniceTeethposted 13 years ago

   It all depends on what you're looking for as a person when you agreed to have a first date to begin with. Having sex with someone you barely know can be exciting, fun and if you're not after any sort of commitment and you both feel an instant attraction to each other, then why not? On the other hand, if i'm in a stage in my life in which I'm aiming for a little bit more than just a fling and I feel serious chemistry with my date, then I'd try waiting a few more dates. When sex is in the middle so soon it can make things complicated when they're really not. As a woman, I find it quite hard to separate feelings and expectations of my date with the actual sex intercourse, and I wouldn't want it any other way!If I have to compare my greatest sex experiences with someone I have just met and with someone I've been dating for a while, I'd rather the latter, even if eventually the relationship didn't work. Besides, having said that, first times with strangers can be fun, but they can also be awkward. As for on line communication, the same thing applies. Maybe this sounds just like an old fashioned girl thing but if I really like the guy and I have some basic interest in the person further than mere physical pleasure, I will wait.

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9. 59

   SomewayOuttaHereposted 13 years ago

   sex only when you get married..........what some of you are having sex before or in between????

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10. 55

    prettydarkhorseposted 13 years ago

    No for me, because I want to make it special, not that it is not special the first time you met in person, but it is good if you feel the dating part first -- like enjoy talking or eating etc.

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11. 90

    Polly Cposted 13 years ago

    Not for me either - personally I would have to form more of an emotional attachement to someone first.

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12. 65

    SpiritLeoposted 13 years ago

    An honest man will tell you that if he has sex with a girl on a first date, he may enjoy it, but he probably won’t want to date her seriously because the mystery and the challenge are gone.
    Men are hunters and enjoy the chase, and the longer the chase goes on, the greater his respect and the more likely a woman will win his heart.

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    1. 37

       katarinaphangposted 13 years agoin reply to this

       Not always the case, though.  My last 2 long term relationships, including with my husband, we had sex on the first dates (yes, believe it or not).  I wrote lengthily here:
       
       http://gettheloveyoudeserve.info/forum/ … ould-we-or
       
       and here:
       
       http://gettheloveyoudeserve.info/forum/ … hey-feel-1

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       1. 62

          Greek Oneposted 13 years agoin reply to this

          i'm not going to believe that until i see photographic evidence

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             katarinaphangposted 13 years agoin reply to this

             LOL...you need our foot prints too?

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                Greek Oneposted 13 years agoin reply to this

                nah.. not into feet

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    2. 37

       katarinaphangposted 13 years agoin reply to this

       Often when you refuse to have sex too long, he will leave because he feels you don't like him.  He has needs too, you know.  And it's not about the physical aspect of it (though it's certainly attractive).
       
       So be careful, playing coy can backfire big time. You have to take into account his needs too.  That's what's relationship is all about, no?

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    3. 60

       logic,commonsenseposted 13 years agoin reply to this

       If the mystery and challenge are gone after sex on the first date, there wasn't much there to begin with.
       I would have to say the mystery and challenge would be to see if it happened again on the 2nd date?

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13. 62

    Greek Oneposted 13 years ago

    manditory...
    
    or else i go home very, very sad and assume she is a lesbian

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    1. 64

       pisean282311posted 13 years agoin reply to this

       i have gone home sad most of times as per ur point then..

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       1. 62

          Greek Oneposted 13 years agoin reply to this

          so many lesbians out there!!!!!11

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14. 63

    Wayne Orvisburgposted 13 years ago

    Yes Please

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15. 50

    stlouiskidposted 13 years ago

    As a man I started dating two girls at the same time about a week apart. One gave it up on the first date the other did not(I tried.   I married the one that did not!!!!!

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    1. 62

       Greek Oneposted 13 years agoin reply to this

       still got the number of the 1st girl??

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          pisean282311posted 13 years agoin reply to this

          

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    2. 69

       Pearldiverposted 13 years agoin reply to this

       Of course if what you say is true.... then legally your marriage is null and void.  If you haven't consummated it then not only are you a Dud... but so is your marriage

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          Greek Oneposted 13 years agoin reply to this

          you have to take things slow in marriage in order for the passion to last 40 or 50 years.

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             kimberlyslyricsposted 13 years agoin reply to this

             must agree.

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          kimberlyslyricsposted 13 years agoin reply to this

          

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16. 64

    ceciliabeltranposted 13 years ago

    i don't try food unless i know what's in it. so same with men.

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    1. 83

       donotfearposted 13 years agoin reply to this

       
       Excellent......applause!

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17. 68

    torimariposted 13 years ago

    Aside from this online dating (no comment), no way would I be bumping on the first date.
    
    I won't let anyone hit it unless they are worth it and I feel like I want to pursue a relationship with them.
    
    Unless someone is just looking for a casual sex partner, sex on the first few dates sounds like a recipe for a failing, physically-centered relationship.
    
    Depends what ya want.

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    1. 62

       Greek Oneposted 13 years agoin reply to this

       lol aside from online date

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       1. 68

          torimariposted 13 years agoin reply to this

          Haha, this is called me not reading what I wrote. I'm not a big supporter of online dating and didn't want to get into the whole 'sex on first date since we have talked 'dated' online for 5 months' thing. Some people find it a touchy area....bad choice of words on my part.

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             Justine76posted 13 years agoin reply to this

             he he..touchy...

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18. 78

    Fluffymetalposted 13 years ago

    I don't think it's lady like... but hell I've done it.

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       katarinaphangposted 13 years agoin reply to this

       I like to be unlady-like, sometimes...it's fun and liberating.

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          Justine76posted 13 years agoin reply to this

          ha ha!!! It's pretty fun, especially if your as pretty as you!! I bet the boys mouths just drop.

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             katarinaphangposted 13 years agoin reply to this

             Oh thanks ...(blushed).

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                Justine76posted 13 years agoin reply to this

                your welcome. Have fun here, its nice to meet you!

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19. 79

    wychicposted 13 years ago

    I'd say definitely not, for me, because I like to know that a guy will work hard for that particular privilege . However, that said, since online was brought up...I have had sex on a "first date", though it was after six months of talking to the guy online and it was his first day here after giving away nearly all of his earthly possessions and moving thousands of miles to be with me. I think he already proved he was willing to work hard for it. And I married him a year later, so I guess it worked out just fine .

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    1. 37

       katarinaphangposted 13 years agoin reply to this

       Yes it all depends...

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20. 63

    Mishaposted 13 years ago

    Sex on a first date? I love it

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    1. 37

       katarinaphangposted 13 years agoin reply to this

       Surprise...surprise....

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21. 80

    LeanManposted 13 years ago

    Why date??? Does anyone out there want sex??

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    1. 37

       katarinaphangposted 13 years agoin reply to this

       I have done that too...

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22. 0

    Non-offensiveUserposted 13 years ago

    Sex on the first date is great, unfortunately I'm usually the only one that shows up so it kinda looses something.

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       katarinaphangposted 13 years agoin reply to this

       Ha...it that all you can get?

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          Non-offensiveUserposted 13 years agoin reply to this

          I even brought flowers, and nothing.....

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          1. 37

             katarinaphangposted 13 years agoin reply to this

             I just reread your post again, thought it was hilarious.  Yes it's hard to have sex when you MASTURDATE.

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23. 0

    Justine76posted 13 years ago

    the last time I had sex on a first date I ended up married...

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    1. 37

       katarinaphangposted 13 years agoin reply to this

       Ha...me too!!  So be careful, if you don't want to marry too soon don't have sex on first date!  Make sure it's 3rd.  Safer that way.

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          Justine76posted 13 years agoin reply to this

          wait a sec, I just saw at the top, this is under "breaking up"? hahahahhaa.....wait, maybe that wasn't supposed to be funny?

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       myownworldposted 13 years agoin reply to this

       me too! What a price to pay for a little 'mishap' like that....!

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          Justine76posted 13 years agoin reply to this

          HAHAAHHAHAHAHAHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
          
          gotta go take the results of my first date to the Doctor's for her annual checkup now.     catch y'all later

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       2. 37

          katarinaphangposted 13 years agoin reply to this

          too funneeee....

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24. 72

    Cagsilposted 13 years ago

    
    
    The last time I had sex I wasn't even dating the girl and we did not go out on a date at all.
    
    

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       Justine76posted 13 years agoin reply to this

       ummmmmm
       
       Im so confused...

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          Cagsilposted 13 years agoin reply to this

          Why are you confused Justine?

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       katarinaphangposted 13 years agoin reply to this

       Did you order it online for delivery?

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          Cagsilposted 13 years agoin reply to this

          No.

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    3. 0

       Non-offensiveUserposted 13 years agoin reply to this

       Did you have to get a shot afterwards to get the dripping to stop too? 
       
       Sorry is that too much info?

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          Cagsilposted 13 years agoin reply to this

          You're not funny.

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             Non-offensiveUserposted 13 years agoin reply to this

             I just wanted to know if I was the only one

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25. 0

    Non-offensiveUserposted 13 years ago

    Anyone want to go on a date?

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    1. 73

       myownworldposted 13 years agoin reply to this

       with or without..um.....?!

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          Non-offensiveUserposted 13 years agoin reply to this

          Well I'm not looking to get married if that's what you're asking....

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             myownworldposted 13 years agoin reply to this

             
             
             you aren't? whew..glad we've got that out of the way....!
             
             @justine, take care with it...time for annual reflection on our past mistakes.... 

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          2. 37

             katarinaphangposted 13 years agoin reply to this

             then no sex for you...!

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26. 61

    Milla Mahnoposted 13 years ago

    I enjoy it

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       katarinaphangposted 13 years agoin reply to this

       You mean sex on first date or the discussion?

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          Milla Mahnoposted 13 years agoin reply to this

          Well, I meant sex actually - but both

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          Non-offensiveUserposted 13 years agoin reply to this

          If it means anything, I've never been on a second date...

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             katarinaphangposted 13 years agoin reply to this

             You are always dumped after sex on first date?   or after first date period?

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                Non-offensiveUserposted 13 years agoin reply to this

                I'm usually the only one showing up for the first, so what's the point of a second?

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27. 63

    Richieb799posted 13 years ago

    
    
    Uploaded with ImageShack.us
    
    you knew he was gonna turn up in this thread
    
    I could be bothered to state my opinion but I thought this was funny

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28. 62

    Greek Oneposted 13 years ago

    in all honesty, when a girl did anything with me on a first date, I automatically put her in the 'not marriage material" pile.
    
    I know that is hypocritical, and I know that it is unfair because I spent much of time on these first dates trying to get laid....
    
    but I have forgiven myself and I'm OK with that now
    

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       katarinaphangposted 13 years agoin reply to this

       I bet if you really like the girl you'll give her a chance to prove you wrong.

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29. 60

    logic,commonsenseposted 13 years ago

    I always think of sex on the first date!  And everyone after that!

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30. 60

    bojanglesk8posted 13 years ago

    I like.

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31. 60

    MadCowWritingsposted 13 years ago

    I let my date to the thinking while I do the talking.

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32. 61

    saltposted 13 years ago

    It seems the more male and the more mature male favor sex on the first date. The more burned by love, the more eager for quick passion.
    
    The women, some seem to marry whoever they have dated longest without having had sex. Some seem as if marriage was a trap set by the male they dated.
    
    Others warn of the dangers of diseases from those too keen to wait.
    
    So, what would it be. I think it depends on the relationship. If you know someone and like them then the shift from friendship to a sexual relationship could be one that is a natural progression. For those who have waited until they were in a deep committed relationship, just to find that in bed there is no passion or joy or fun or desire....
    
    So what can be the sign of a relationship set to bloom?
    
    And are all relationships meant to be those that last for life?
    
    There are a few very stereotypical male responses to what they expect of women, whilst they may pressure for the opposite and then project an image upon the female that may in fact be their own.
    
    Possibly, boys should be educated in how to woe a girl and develop good relationships rather than the did you get any... does she put out?
    
    Which, for some has resulted in a boy bumbling his way forward with a girl who had no desire give that part of her to someone wanting to prove his manhood to his friends in the playground.
    
    And that is it. At that age, it is still a playground - teach boys respect and girls freedom to choose.

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    1. 64

       Ben Evansposted 13 years agoin reply to this

       The atypical response in regards to having sex on the first date is either it is not okay for moral reasons or it is all right.
       
       There is no middle ground.  I do beleive that people should do what the believe is right not what they are led to believe.
       
       You bring up a good point.  We as males have been socialized in the sexual sphere.  "Did you get it?"......... is a common thing that we hear.  In fact we are socialized to believe that verility is so important.  ie frequency, size, longetivity ect.
       
       Sex on the first date for most  is a "one night stand".  For most men a one night stand is stroke of their virility.  I think if someone is interested in developing a relationship they should refrain from making sex the most important part. There will be sex at some point and it may be real frequent but at that point it will part of the relationship as opposed to some social necessity.

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33. 66

    alternate poetposted 13 years ago

    for most people if they dind't get sex on the first date they would never get any !

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    1. 64

       Ben Evansposted 13 years agoin reply to this

       I have had relationships where sex goes away.  It feels bad.  I believe that sex often is used not only for procreation and pleasure but for control.  Both men and women use it in this manner.
       
       It hurts though and when we look inside and wonder......."What did I do?"

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       watchyaposted 13 years agoin reply to this

       

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34. 0

    philip carey 61posted 13 years ago

    I think that if you love someone, if you truly have feelings for them, then that is the standard. Sex is a natural and beautiful expression of two people in love. Call me a prude, but I find the idea of casual sex both cheap and empty. I realize some people are able to separate sex from emotion. I have never been able to do that.
    
    But, sure, if I see a beautiful woman, I'm prone to turn my eyes over her once, albeit discreetly. ;-)

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       alternate poetposted 13 years agoin reply to this

       that is an easy trick - love for the moment, suspend disbelief and pretend you are both in some tacky bodice ripper - worked for me in my 'working' days,  every time   now of course I am a sober well behaved gentleman

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35. 79

    mega1posted 13 years ago

    If you've known someone a long time, and this first date is more like a "tryst" - go for it!  But sex with someone you don't know very well is always a very, very bad idea - don't make yourself so vulnerable - even being alone with someone you don't know very well is a bad, bad idea!

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