Have you ever dumped a guy because he lost his job?

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   aykianinkposted 11 years ago

   I've seen this more than once and would love to hear everyone's opinion.

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      Lybrahposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      No, but it would depend.  What kind of job did he have and how many jobs has he lost?  I wouldn't be with a loser.

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         aykianinkposted 11 years agoin reply to this

         One earning low to medium wages, and the other earning six digits.  Both lost just one job over a fairly large period of time.
         
         Let's put it another way, what if I dumped my girl in her time of need?  That's cool, right?

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         gmwilliamsposted 7 years agoin reply to this

         +1,000,000,000,000,000,000-no finance, no romance!

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      Rishita Jainposted 6 years agoin reply to this

      Deleted
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         gmwilliamsposted 6 years agoin reply to this

         You do have a POVERTY MENTALITY........You love being poor & struggling.

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   paradigmsearchposted 11 years ago

   Fair weather friends... Based on my experiences in 2012. I am very happy to say that I know for a fact that I have none of those.

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      Beth37posted 11 years agoin reply to this

      What goes around comes around. If you love someone, you stick by them thru hard times.

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         paradigmsearchposted 11 years agoin reply to this

         I'll do that even when I just like someone.

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         aykianinkposted 11 years agoin reply to this

         EXACTLY, right?  Sadly, I have seen otherwise.

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   aykianinkposted 11 years ago

   Hm.  I was hoping for more feedback.  Maybe this isn't as common as I think?

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   wildernessposted 11 years ago

   If a girl (or spouse) dumped me for losing my job I would count my lucky stars that she was gone.  Love was obviously taking a second place to money.
   
   Of course, if that was the 10th job loss in a year it might be a little different...

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      Stacie Lposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      I agree wilderness. She may have supported him and this was the last straw for her...or she is a gold digger..
      No love lost.

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         aykianinkposted 11 years agoin reply to this

         In the situation that I saw first-hand, my friend was doing well and so was his girl.  Then he lost his job.  I remember him...buying her a lot of jewelry.  Now, you'd THINK that the female in the relationship that was prepping to be a doctor and going to med school WOULDN'T be a gold digger, but I'm having a hard time arguing that right now...
         
         In another situation, the guy was doing very well and then lost his job.  (Much more recent.)  He was trying to find a job.  Literally door-to-door asking for work.  When he was about to lose his apartment, the girl gives him the news that the relationship is over.

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            Stacie Lposted 11 years agoin reply to this

            I would have to say that both men need to find different types of women to have relationships with. maybe they are attracting the wrong ones...I wish them well.

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      gmwilliamsposted 6 years agoin reply to this

      A SMART woman would, why stick w/an UNEMPLOYED loser.  If a man DOESN'T bring anything to the table, a woman DOESN'T need him & would be FOOLISH to stay with him.  Find a man w/a JOB, Jeez.....  It is apparent that there are people who love LOSERS!   NO JOB, NO RELATIONSHIP.......People can't be this asinine!

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   Denise Handlonposted 11 years ago

   Nope, x 2.

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      aykianinkposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      Ah.  Thank you, Denise.  I would have been surprised if you said you HAD dumped someone because he lost a job.  Quality woman.  *tips hat*

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         Denise Handlonposted 11 years agoin reply to this

         You're sweet. 

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   brimancandyposted 11 years ago

   Being in this position myself, I can somewhat agree with someone who drops a partner because of lack of work. This is usually the case for those people who live together in the same space. It's usually because one can no longer support the two of you on one income. This happened to me with my partner  of 20+ years. We lost our apartment, because we could not afford to live there, and since we each had family we could fall back on, we now live apart. We tried everything to stay together, but it just wasn't going to work. Including living with my brother, which was even worse.
   
   But, for a couple who does not share expenses, if one drops the other over a job, there is probably an alternate reason that they have for wanting to end the relationship, and there probably won't be any discussion on saving that relationship. If you are not already living together, chances are, you really did not want to commit to that relationship in the first place.
   
   A lot of people do enter relationships for financial gain. I was accused of that, even after my partner lost his job, and I was the sole money earner for more than 8 years. I was still considered the gold digger that ruined my partners life, even though I was really committed to it. That used to drive me nuts! It took getting us through hardship to see that I truly cared, even though all my friends were telling me to drop my partner like a rock, right after he lost his job. I refused. Don't regret it for a second. That's how much I care.

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      aykianinkposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      I applaud you, brimancandy.  If this had been posted in the Questions section (which I will no longer do because I don't get the traffic I'm looking for), I would vote this as 'best answer.'  Regarding what I've seen, sometimes the couple IS financially dependent, and sometimes not so much.  The med student that dumped my friend?  They weren't even CLOSE to living together. 
      
      As you said, "If you are not already living together, chances are, you really did not want to commit to that relationship in the first place."  I am still amazed those two stayed together as long as they did.
      
      "I was still considered the gold digger that ruined my partners life, even though I was really committed to it. That used to drive me nuts!"  I'm sorry to hear that.  That sounds absolutely infuriating.
      
      Once again.  *applause*

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         brimancandyposted 11 years agoin reply to this

         Thanks. I appreciate that.

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            aykianinkposted 11 years agoin reply to this

            This line, "...even though all my friends were telling me to drop my partner like a rock..." still bounces around in my head.  *sigh* Oh well.

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   Pinkchic18posted 11 years ago

   I wouldn't and I have not. I've had boyfriends lose jobs and have not had the urge to leave them. Why kick someone when they're down? That's when they need support the most, I think.

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      aykianinkposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      See, that's how I've always looked at it.  Maybe it's less common than I think then.
      *Pinkchic gets the Non-Gold-Digger Star*

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      Beth37posted 11 years agoin reply to this

      Thumbs up.

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   sarah mwaiposted 4 years ago

   Not really..am dating someone not the job so even if my bf lost his job i won't dump him.

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   KayCummingposted 4 years ago

   Same here

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