Limericks - Limericks - Limericks

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  1. Paraglider profile image89
    Paragliderposted 15 years ago

    Greetings -
    Fellow hubber Alekhouse visited my limerick hub yesterday and suggested (in a limerick exchange) we should bring it here, as a challenge.

    Please join in, with original limericks only.
    If unsure how to write one, instructions are here
    http://hubpages.com/hub/How_to_write_a_Limerick
    Here goes:



    OK - the floor's free...

    1. mohitmisra profile image61
      mohitmisraposted 15 years agoin reply to this

      Bonding through words is so fine,
      Do you all know you are divine?

      The sparks of poets in all of you,
      Through this love we all grew.

    2. Deborah-Lynn profile image59
      Deborah-Lynnposted 15 years agoin reply to this

      I thought I would see this one through
      Write a Limerick expressly for you,
      PG and A-House
      May think me a Louse
      For knocking their Forum Askew!

  2. profile image0
    Ghost32posted 15 years ago

    Instead of preparing to sleep
    Or at least to count woolly sheep
    Right here on this thread
    From out of my head
    Comes rhyming with timing so cheap

    Instead of out making a buck
    Here I am trying my luck
    I'll not make a dime
    Not one single time
    But at least my keyboard's not stuck

  3. Paraglider profile image89
    Paragliderposted 15 years ago

    It's better than having a moan,
    a whinge or a whine or a groan.
    Religion is woolly
    and politics gruely
    but limericks cut to the bone.

  4. SweetiePie profile image77
    SweetiePieposted 15 years ago

    Limericks are not my style,
    but I can stack socks in a giant pile.

  5. profile image0
    wordscribe41posted 15 years ago

    I welcome this fun writing fest.
    of all the topics, the best.
    No arguing here,
    it's pure and sincere.
    But pardon, I think I digressed.

    1. profile image0
      LEWJposted 15 years agoin reply to this

      I really like this--it's sharp and funny too.

  6. Paraglider profile image89
    Paragliderposted 15 years ago

    Digression is perfectly fine.
    Consider the socks on the line
    It's patently silly
    to think of a lily
    as Solomon's footwear, or mine.

  7. profile image0
    Lady_Eposted 15 years ago

    Totally agree with Wordscribe
    This thread has a very good vibe
    It's a new thing
    It doesn't sting
    and Paraglider's been a good Guide.

  8. frogdropping profile image75
    frogdroppingposted 15 years ago

    I'm currently on Holiday
    Very hard it is - to play;
    For I'm on a Big Rock
    And I find it a Shock
    Hearing tourists claim "awesome" each day

    neutral

    1. earnestshub profile image73
      earnestshubposted 15 years agoin reply to this

      I just found this sweet little thread
      It reminded me that I'm not dead
      If I had my way,
      I'd be rhyming all day
      cos I talk from the back of my head.

      1. couturepopcafe profile image60
        couturepopcafeposted 13 years agoin reply to this

        wow

        1. wordscribe43 profile image88
          wordscribe43posted 13 years agoin reply to this

          I know...  And frogdropping, thanks for that.  There's a lot of irony in this thread if you read carefully.

          1. couturepopcafe profile image60
            couturepopcafeposted 13 years agoin reply to this

            I went through the thread and found others he wrote.  All with the same irony.  Thanks frogdropping for bringing this back.

  9. alekhouse profile image70
    alekhouseposted 15 years ago

    I'm excited and welcome with glee
    that PG created for me
    this forum so cool,
    a limerick pool.
    It's certainly my cup of tea

  10. frogdropping profile image75
    frogdroppingposted 15 years ago

    Earnest I think that you'll find
    Tis best to remember this rhyme;
    When you're dead and departed
    You'll find that you've started
    At the end of a very long line.

        big_smile

  11. LondonGirl profile image80
    LondonGirlposted 15 years ago

    All Hail the limerick thread!
    Who needs to be sleeping in bed?
    The hubpages forum
    requires a quorum
    of humour - no shouting instead.

  12. Paraglider profile image89
    Paragliderposted 15 years ago

    We welcome you all to the party
    with limericks, happy and hearty!
    So never forget
    there's no need to sweat
    or even to get your hands clarty.

  13. BadHubbit profile image61
    BadHubbitposted 15 years ago

    When Hubbits have nothing to do
    A limerick or a haiku
    Is just up their street
    This verse is so neat
    To kick-start the forums anew!

    1. Paradise7 profile image68
      Paradise7posted 15 years agoin reply to this

      God, you're all so GOOD! 
      You do it like we should.
      You do it so well
      It justs seems to gel

                   Hubbit.
                   I love it!.
      big_smile cool big_smile

  14. Paraglider profile image89
    Paragliderposted 15 years ago

    So where are the rest of the crew?
    Teresa, CW too,
    and DJ and Mohit
    (our heavenly poet)
    Perhaps they're all down with the flu?

    1. alekhouse profile image70
      alekhouseposted 15 years agoin reply to this

      I'm "reaching" for this one. Can you help me PG?

      I hope they catch up with us soon
      and give us a try before noon.
      T'would be so inviting
      to savor their writing
      instead of just whistling a tune.

  15. manlypoetryman profile image79
    manlypoetrymanposted 15 years ago

    Oh...so it is a limerick that thou seeks...
    I can do this poetry with a few tweaks...
    So, I thought about each line,
    Making sure they made a limerick rhyme,
    And thought...limerick lines are for geeks! big_smile big_smile big_smile

    Juz' kiddin'...I only play...
    I meant nuth-in' by what I say...
    just came up with this pun,
    and couldn't resist the fun,
    Of firin' off one...in a "Manly" way!coollolneutral

    Please don't find MPM as someone mean...
    I wrestled with this 'til I turned green...
    I'm still new here, my hub clicks could get rocky,
    If I wrote something like a jerk-and appear cocky,
    However, my rhymin' is greater than anyone has ever seen!big_smile

    (Not true-the rhymes from all these great limericks before me are way much better! Humbly, MPM)

  16. profile image0
    Ghost32posted 15 years ago

    Arizona is hot in the morn
    But at least I'm not writing porn
    My wife being nice
    Wants me to get ice
    'Fore we die and rejoin the unborn

    By writing a limerick or three
    I avoid all the troubles I see
    Oh sure I am broke
    A dirt-crusted bloke
    In denial's where I'd rather be

    On the TV is Family Feud
    The commercial is nasty 'n' rude
    But I've got to dash
    Without any cash
    The kitty needs food and just mewed

  17. onthewriteside profile image61
    onthewritesideposted 15 years ago

    Said Clinton to Miss Lewinsky
    Don't leave evidence like Kaczynski
    Your face is a mess
    Take the hem of your dress
    And wipe that stuff off your chinski

  18. Paraglider profile image89
    Paragliderposted 15 years ago

    Lewinski and Clinton? - Old hat.
    We don't need to talk about that.
    (It's better to stick
    some broad on your dick
    than bomb the f*ck out of Baghdad).

    1. onthewriteside profile image61
      onthewritesideposted 15 years agoin reply to this

      LOL!  How true Paraglider!  OK...How's this:

      Said America to Osama Bin Laden
      9/11?  Or have you forgotten?
      Hide if you will
      We will hunt you still
      'Till your lame azz is layin in a coffin.

      Or here's one for Obama:

      OnTheWriteSide said to Oblahblah
      Your policies sound like true caca
      I'll bet you a fin
      That once you are in
      Your promises will all come to nada

    2. Drew Breezzy profile image64
      Drew Breezzyposted 15 years agoin reply to this

      haha funny !

    3. Daniel Carter profile image62
      Daniel Carterposted 15 years agoin reply to this

      I published a silly hub of poems and two limericks. Here were my contributions regarding pigeons:

      Limerick The First:
      The Bird Lady’s fond of all pigeons.
      So much that she’d start a religion.
      She’d call, “Kitty-coo,”
      From under the poo
      Which weighed much on her final decision.


      Limerick The Second:
      Pigeons loved to bomb old Colonel Thistle.
      The bombs even made sounds like whistles!
      The Colonel, in fits,
      Finally scared them to bits
      By launching a heat seeking missle.


      http://hubpages.com/hub/Pigeon-Limerick … -Past-Life

  19. blondepoet profile image69
    blondepoetposted 15 years ago

    Twas only this morn I did sight,
    A man whose jeans were too tight,
    He squeaked when he walked,
    And beeped when he talked,
    As he adjusted his balls to the right.

    1. profile image0
      LEWJposted 15 years agoin reply to this

      Tee-hee!  I like ths one!

  20. anjalichugh profile image68
    anjalichughposted 15 years ago

    Ok I need time to think,
    While I make myself a drink,
    My eyes are droopy,
    And my vision blurry,
    Seems my thoughts are not in sync.

  21. earnestshub profile image73
    earnestshubposted 15 years ago

    limericks are very cool
    I can break every poetry rule
    and over time,
    if it just doesn't rhyme
    I will stop...
    and not look like a fool.

  22. earnestshub profile image73
    earnestshubposted 15 years ago

    I just have to do it once more
    I know it won't ad to my score
    I still have the urge
    to purge all my words
    until I can do it no more.

  23. onthewriteside profile image61
    onthewritesideposted 15 years ago

    If I were a man from Nantucket
    And saw the whole world as a bucket
    I would puncture its side,
    From the leak, there would glide
    All the fools, then I would say, "F**k it!

  24. Paraglider profile image89
    Paragliderposted 15 years ago

    It's six in the morning and warm.
    The dust is whipped up in the storm
    and lashes the faces
    of workers in places
    we'd run from, but here it's the norm.

  25. RedElf profile image89
    RedElfposted 15 years ago

    This limerick post is too peachy!
    It's hard, in one verse, to get preachy...
    So farewell "Religion",
    No politic bridgin',
    Just fun, rhyme, and rum-licious Chi-chis

    We'll put out to sea on a junket
    With tea, Devon cream, and a crumpet;
    If we don't run aground,
    Back to harbor we're bound,
    Blowing "Tan, tan-ta-ra" on the trumpet.

  26. Paraglider profile image89
    Paragliderposted 15 years ago

    A limerick isn't the place
    for shoving your views in our face.
    RedElf's on the ball -
    Just say nothing at all
    but with humour and nonsense and grace wink

  27. blondepoet profile image69
    blondepoetposted 15 years ago

    There once was an artist named Saint,
    Who swallowed some samples of paint.
    All shades of the spectrum
    Flowed out of his rectum
    With a colourful lack of restraint

    1. profile image58
      logic,commonsenseposted 15 years agoin reply to this

      I love it!

      1. blondepoet profile image69
        blondepoetposted 15 years agoin reply to this

        Haha smile smile

  28. profile image58
    logic,commonsenseposted 15 years ago

    There once was a man with a penis as big as a root
    He said it was 12 inches and looks blacker than soot
    "Oh, cried the wenches,
    It cannot be 12 inches,
    because then it would be a foot!

  29. Paraglider profile image89
    Paragliderposted 15 years ago

    But Blondie - we've heard it before.
    These oldies are simply a bore.
    This cutting and pasting
    is nothing but wasting
    a post. Now, two new ones, or more...

  30. profile image58
    logic,commonsenseposted 15 years ago

    There once was a girl from Nantucket
    who had a puss as big as a bucket,
    when she walked it sloshed
    so much her panties were washed
    and all the boys were too scared to f**k it!

  31. earnestshub profile image73
    earnestshubposted 15 years ago

    I like my limericks clean
    not a bad sexy word to be seen
    just funny or silly
    not rude willynilly
    with just joining word in between

  32. blondepoet profile image69
    blondepoetposted 15 years ago

    There was a woman called Dawn,
    Who married a midget named Sean,
    On the night of their wedding,
    He got lost in the bedding,
    But was found by the maid in the morn.

  33. RedElf profile image89
    RedElfposted 15 years ago

    Yes, Ernest, you're getting the hang of it;
    You just join up words without slanging it;
    Like cheese on a trisket,
    Or mustard on brisket,
    'Tis tastier chewing, than fanging it..

  34. earnestshub profile image73
    earnestshubposted 15 years ago

    when Harry met Sally in battle
    the big scene they had in Seattle
    embarrassed the patrons
    scared all the matrons
    and probably frightened the cattle.

  35. SweetiePie profile image77
    SweetiePieposted 15 years ago

    My sister does not understand my addiction,
    My computer is my friend and affliction.
    I love my computer to pieces,
    I just think I should spend more time sweeping up pieces.
    Sweeping my floor would break the hubpages addiction!

  36. earnestshub profile image73
    earnestshubposted 15 years ago

    I hate my computer to bits
    It really does give me the s**ts
    When I go to upload
    the thing is a toad
    and as slow as a slug that has fits.

  37. SweetiePie profile image77
    SweetiePieposted 15 years ago

    He told me that books are full of lies,
    And he does not believe in school supplies.
    He told me he bought his diploma on the internet,
    And he thinks that is truly competent,
    But he is the one full of lies.

  38. RedElf profile image89
    RedElfposted 15 years ago

    This Limerick thread has been swell,
    But I find I must bid you farewell;
    I leave you in sorrow,
    But back here tomorrow,
    I'll hasten, I'm under your spell...

  39. RedElf profile image89
    RedElfposted 15 years ago

    PG this has been so much fun,
    But I'm called on to rise with the sun;
    My shoulders are stooping,
    My eyelids are drooping -
    I bid thee adieu, Scotland's son

  40. profile image0
    Lady_Eposted 15 years ago

    My Adsense earnings are down
    It keeps on making me frown
    but Forums is Fun
    and life must go on
    So, tonight, I’ll be partying in Town

  41. earnestshub profile image73
    earnestshubposted 15 years ago

    I'm buggared I tells ya... worn out.
    from runnin around like a tout
    I's rather be resting
    as well as digesting
    the new forums when they come out.

  42. Paraglider profile image89
    Paragliderposted 15 years ago

    By now it is perfectly clear
    we'll not be seeing Mohit round here.
    I'm sure he's not frightened
    but, being enlightened,
    he's probably gone for a beer.

  43. earnestshub profile image73
    earnestshubposted 15 years ago

    A beer, now that would be nice
    I could even manage one twice
    If I can't have a beer
    I'll hang around here
    and comment, that's my other vice.

  44. Paraglider profile image89
    Paragliderposted 15 years ago

    It's not so much fun in Qatar.
    You can't get a drink in a bar
    before five o'clock
    and (this came as a shock)
    with passport, to show who you are!

    1. earnestshub profile image73
      earnestshubposted 15 years agoin reply to this

      I may stay away from the east
      It doesn't seem much of a feast
      if you can't get some drinks
      I think that it stinks
      I would soon have to gargle with yeast.

      1. profile image0
        wordscribe41posted 15 years agoin reply to this

        Gargle with yeast you must
        it's good for that thing called lust
        beer goggles are odd
        turn you into a sod
        suddenly you're big and robust.

  45. profile image0
    wordscribe41posted 15 years ago

    Limericks are good for the brain
    Hub writing's making me insane
    My dendrites are firing
    creativity's inspiring
    albeit a little inane.

  46. earnestshub profile image73
    earnestshubposted 15 years ago

    I enjoy time spent making a rhyme
    My brain does it all of the time
    tho thinking in verse
    may be seen as a curse
    I cant stop until it's after nine.

  47. earnestshub profile image73
    earnestshubposted 15 years ago

    Is gargling with yeast's good for lust?
    I will have to take that one on trust
    I am lusty it's true
    but it's all about you
    so please show me a pic of your bust.

  48. earnestshub profile image73
    earnestshubposted 15 years ago

    wordscribe you are pretty.. thats so
    but there's something I want you to know
    it's they way you use words
    that wheys all my curds
    and ruffles the parts down below.

  49. profile image0
    wordscribe41posted 15 years ago

    My bust is a 34 D
    trust me, it's something to see.
    No pic does it justice,
    they're highly robustas,
    my twins are the best part of me.

  50. earnestshub profile image73
    earnestshubposted 15 years ago

    As I said in the earlier verse
    your words are so choice it's a curse
    when you write so sweet
    it tickles my feet...
    Do your 34D's need a nurse?

 
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