Limericks - Limericks - Limericks

1. 70

   earnestshubposted 15 years ago

   Limericks limericks for sale!
   with good wine I would regale
   all who would try
   a limerick by
   writing a five liner tale!

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2. 54

   Shalini Kagalposted 15 years ago

   Now that really sounds like ol’ Omar
   Would that wine be coming in a jar?
   Add on some verse
   One can’t be averse
   To Khayyam-esque treats on our radar!
   
   You know what they say about great minds, Jackson!

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3. 70

   earnestshubposted 15 years ago

   Omar Khayyam beat Copernicus
   to heliocentrics and caused a fuss
   he was a smart one
   a son of a gun
   FitzGerald though he was a plus!

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4. 62

   Lee Booleanposted 15 years ago

   Ernesthub thanks for the plug
   on this here most fabulous hub
   I'm willing to bet
   we'll see better yet
   I'll check after getting some grub

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   1. 0

      LEWJposted 15 years agoin reply to this

      HA!

      replyreport
5. 62

   Lee Booleanposted 15 years ago

   I do like this limericks game,
   but nothing here rhymes with my name
   for the tripe I construe
   one day they will sue
   till then I'll write more of the same

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6. 61

   Laurel Oakesposted 15 years ago

   I JUST STARTED 3 WEEKS AGO
   WRITING HUBS FOR NO ONE I KNOW
   SURE HOPE TO MAKE FRIENDS
   BUT I KNOW IN THE END
   THIS WHOLE THING IS AN ADVENTUROUS SHOW.

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7. 54

   Shalini Kagalposted 15 years ago

   Are you sure of that, Lee Boolean?
   (Is that another language like Fortran?)
   The red suits you well
   And the horns too look swell
   Just right for a Lucifer Limerick man!

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8. 62

   Lee Booleanposted 15 years ago

   how clever you are there Shalini,
   hope you don't make like Houdini
   when I say you look swell
   I think you can tell
   would like to see you in bikini
   }:->

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9. 62

   Lee Booleanposted 15 years ago

   Aww come on now dear lady Oakes,
   you must be telling us jokes
   for here you will see
   a friend, maybe three
   so stay and have fun with us blokes

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10. 62

    Lee Booleanposted 15 years ago

    now where is that old paraglider?
    off surfing the web like a spider?
    I think it is time,
    you speak some more rhyme
    and not make this thread here a slider

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11. 62

    Lee Booleanposted 15 years ago

    LEWJ, I would rhyme to announce
    your postings one cannot denounce
    If only you knew
    my mind is askew
    for your name I cannot pronounce

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12. 0

    LEWJposted 15 years ago

    I'm somewhat familiar with LEWJ
    I just heard him rhyming with BLUEJAY
    He started his tricks
    On page 46-
    Touche and touche and touche!

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    1. 62

       Lee Booleanposted 15 years agoin reply to this

       Aha now I know what to say
       thanks for showing the way
       right now though I have to go
       and go give my old lawn a mow
       pleasure to meet you LEWJ

       replyreport
13. 0

    LEWJposted 15 years ago

    Of Pat
    
    I turned in my  "goodbye"  to Pat                                             
    On accounta she kept gettin' fat
    She ate every cake
    She bought or she baked
    And covered three seats when she sat

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14. 0

    LEWJposted 15 years ago

    Of Jo
    
    I met a "Jo", a true Bahama,
    Offered me a faulty llama
    Played the game
    Forgot the name-
    I think it was, in fact, "Jo Momma"

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15. 0

    LEWJposted 15 years ago

    A Cat In A  Hat
    
    I tell of a cat in a hat
    Who was always achasin' a rat
    Till one day he slipped
    Unhinging his hip
    And spraining his oolakajat

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16. 80

    Doc Snowposted 15 years ago

    Limerick writing's such fun
    By lamp, or by light of the sun,
    That, if done just right,
    You turn out delight
    (Which concludes this terse verse with a pun.)

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17. 47

    Jackson Riddleposted 15 years ago

    I'm thinking of writing a story
    not wanting to make it too gory
    it won't be too wild
    it'll be for a child
    who can read it without a worry

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18. 0

    Ghost32posted 15 years ago

    A story ungory could show
    How just now my flashlight did blow
    The thing fell ker-thunk
    The bulb went ker-flunk
    Now slowly through darkness I go

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19. 47

    Jackson Riddleposted 15 years ago

    And finally when the sun were to rise
    you could open your eyes
    away from the darkness
    with the new found brightness
    and let out a couple of sighs

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20. 70

    earnestshubposted 15 years ago

    Seventeen hours has past.
    far too long since the last
    limerick here
    I'll get the beer
    someone bring wine in a cask.

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    1. 0

       LEWJposted 15 years agoin reply to this

       Now earnest you know, I think,
       Of my recent denouncing of drink
       I happily swore
       On page 54
       In appropriate blackletter ink

       replyreport
21. 0

    Brenda Durhamposted 15 years ago

    I gave my friend some toffee
    She started to sound quite scoffy
    She said it ain't enough
    My night's been pretty rough
    So I'll also need lots of coffee!

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22. 58

    blue_phoenixposted 15 years ago

    think i just jump right in
    and take a hit off this lyrical spiff
    yes my time has arrived
    ill stay and not hide
    damn, am i ready for this

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23. 0

    LEWJposted 15 years ago

    So, somebody else bring the wine
    I'll just nibble on crackers and brine
    Though I surely won't bicker
    'Bout sipping at liquor
    One sweet cracker crumb at a time!

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24. 0

    Jenny-Anneposted 15 years ago

    here goes...
    
    The newbie hubber spent ages
    learning the tricks of hubpages.
    She followed the rules
    when designing capsules
    and replied on the forum
    with grace and decorum.
    She wrote in the sandpit
    on Limericks and rhetoric
    but she still couldn't up
    her hubmetrics.

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25. 0

    LEWJposted 15 years ago

    JEFF THE CHEF
    
    There once was a good 'ol chef
    Who went by the name of Jeff
    He stood on his feet
    And spat on the meat
    While singing aloud in G-cleft

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26. 0

    LEWJposted 15 years ago

    Here comes the tale of a spider
    Who reveled in apple cider;
    He fell in the bottle
    Where soon he got throttled
    And brought forth the wrath of this writer!

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27. 0

    LEWJposted 15 years ago

    OF KITTY
    
    And here's the truth about Kitty
    Whose grits came out too gritty
    See, all while she cooked
    She kept croaking the hook
    From a song by Conway Twitty

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28. 0

    Jenny-Anneposted 15 years ago

    Asta vista la vita! cried the Rasta,
    prostrate on his bed with egg in his dreads
    while da musik beat fasta and fasta!
    "Where's Limerick anyway?" he askeda,
    the murals were spinning,
    his girlfriend was skinning
    and da musik beat fasta and fasta!

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29. 0

    Jenny-Anneposted 15 years ago

    "Good news!" sang the evangelist,
    "We're cleaning up Los Angeles -
    I've been talking to a guru
    from Tutentonkhuru
    and soon we'll be as pure as the Ganges!"

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30. 62

    Lee Booleanposted 15 years ago

    Too bad said the guru,
    We need the blood of a kudu
    To cleanse of the sin
    That’s where to begin
    There’s not a lot else that we could do

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31. 62

    Lee Booleanposted 15 years ago

    now where'd you all go?
    this thread is too slow
    can we make 2k?
    not in this way!
    and then we'll have nothing to show

    replyreport
32. 0

    LEWJposted 15 years ago

    And then there was fisherman Danny
    Complaining he did'nt catch many
    Till fisherman James
    Outloudly proclaimed
    "That's better than not catching ANY!"

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33. 0

    LEWJposted 15 years ago

    Here's to ants in your pants
    At a hoola-hooping dance
    Here's to each
    Tasty peach
    That you come upon per chance

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    1. 0

       LEWJposted 15 years agoin reply to this

       replyreport
34. 54

    Shalini Kagalposted 15 years ago

    It’s been quiet in Limerick Land
    Do you think maybe it needs a hand
    So here we go bump
    Let’s give it a thump
    So we’re back that 2k road so grand

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35. 0

    LEWJposted 15 years ago

    Though his heart, like his ashtray, was broken
    Ol' Denny kept steady at smokin'
    He'd puff and he'd choke
    Then enunciate smoke
    Instead of the words that he'd spoken!

    replyreport
36. 61

    kwaltersposted 15 years ago

    I once had the limerick flu
    Speaking limerick when truly undue
    So I took a pill
    Which worked up until
    I caught it all over anew.

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    1. 0

       LEWJposted 15 years agoin reply to this

       HA!

       replyreport
37. 61

    kwaltersposted 15 years ago

    In my youth I thought all things would last,
    Felt no affinity to any thing past.
    My youth remained callow.
    I lay my seeds shallow,
    Without fear that a storm could amass.
    
    In middle age, I planted my rows deeper,
    Pleaded for good yields from my reaper.
    Storms remained heavy,
    Bogging the levy.
    With nature the ultimate keeper.
    
    Now, age furrows my temple and brow,
    And depression can sharpen its plow.
    But I am the storm,
    And I remain warm,
    Refusing to relinquish somehow.

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38. 0

    Brenda Durhamposted 15 years ago

    A thousand spiders lurked in prey
    To try to weave their webs today
    But the smart bugs evaded
    And never paraded
    In the insects' menacing way.

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    1. 60

       Deborah-Lynnposted 15 years agoin reply to this

       Then LEWJ went off on his Tangent
       With Paraglider on a partying Descent
       Froggydroppings has fled
       Leaving Earnest and Deb
       To carry on behavior too Flagrant!

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    2. 0

       LEWJposted 15 years agoin reply to this

       Perhaps the smarter bugs
       Took up safety under rugs
       Or, perhaps,
       They drew up maps
       For the tunnels they had dug

       replyreport
39. 0

    LEWJposted 15 years ago

    OF LYDIA
    
    I'm sure you all know of Lydia
    Fair maiden of Perfidia
    Whose weakness is men
    Agin' and agin'
    She'll put out aplenty to gidda ya'

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40. 0

    LEWJposted 15 years ago

    OF TRAVEL
    
    Once upon a time ago
    I swam my way from Tokyo
    I rolled across the Bering Strait
    While standing up on roller skates
    That slid me downward into Mexico

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41. 70

    earnestshubposted 15 years ago

    I re-found the post just today
    I thought it had drifted away
    or ran down the road
    pursued by the toad
    or went of to romp in the hay.

    replyreport
42. 82

    elisabethkcmoposted 15 years ago

    my kitten can sleep anywhere
    the ironing board or the chair
    rolled up in a ball
    no worries at all
    that cat-nap is beyond compare!

    replyreport
43. 0

    LEWJposted 15 years ago

    Now that you're back in the swing
    How' bout doin' your limerick thing
    Maybe adding a this
    Or a that or a hiss
    Or a beep or a bleep or a dong or a ding?   
    
    
    
    
    (This one is to you, earnesthub.   Hey there elizabethkcmo)

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44. 70

    earnestshubposted 15 years ago

    Ah LEWJ your here my dear friend
    we'll stick to it right to the end
    till we've posted a million
    or perhaps a gazillion
    limericks always to tend.

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45. 0

    LEWJposted 15 years ago

    OF CROWDED BEDS
    
    Moogie sneezed and then he coughed
    Millie'd pulled his blanket off
    Marlon fell off on the floor
    Momma turned and snored some more
    As Myrna smiled and murmured something soft
    
    
    (It's 11am here, earnesthub.  I fled to bed soon after my last post here.  Now I'm up and running!)

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46. 0

    LEWJposted 15 years ago

    Monday died before my face
    Tuesday left without a trace
    Wednesday up and fled the scene
    Thursday vanished like a dream
    And Friday, Saturday, Sunday led the race!

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47. 54

    Shalini Kagalposted 15 years ago

    The limerick train has started again
    On track with Ernest and LEWJ who pen
    The best of the lot
    So surely we aught
    To touch that milestone ahead soon, amen!

    replyreport
48. 0

    LEWJposted 15 years ago

    I tend to doubt
    We'll go the route
    That makes the grade
    Inside the shade
    Till we beat the limerick drought
    
    (We might get to 2,010 lims sometime next year, but not by January 1st)

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49. 0

    LEWJposted 15 years ago

    Pickin' Cotton 
    
    Bobby felt like pickin' cotton     
    JoJo thought the same was rotten
    CheeChee sniggled over both
    LoLo laughed at him the most
    While Ona swore outright that she'd forgotten

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50. 61

    kwaltersposted 15 years ago

    Once, a man with a malformed morality
    Developed a dual personality.
    With one hand he prayed,
    While the other one played,
    Supplying a special spirituality.

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