Limericks - Limericks - Limericks

1. 79

   earnestshubposted 14 years ago

   the fear is a natural reaction
   to the god of their religious faction
   who will burn them in hell
   if there's even a smell
   of them taking an opposite action

   replyreport
   1. 0

      wordscribe41posted 14 years agoin reply to this

      So true, it really is old,
      all cut from the same brainwashed mold,
      If one of them's banned,
      one returns equally bland,
      with myths they've all extolled.

      replyreport
2. 85

   SweetiePieposted 14 years ago

   Religion is not always a bad thing
   
   But when it is made the only thing
   
   Then it becomes confrontational
   
   But for many it is inspirational
   
   So it depends on how you see this thing

   replyreport
3. 79

   earnestshubposted 14 years ago

   sweetiePie you are a suprise
   with words that are kindly and wise
   we will leave out religions
   and talk about pidgeons
   their wings and the shape of their eyes.

   replyreport
4. 85

   SweetiePieposted 14 years ago

   I did not mean to talk about religion
   
   Just saying people like division
   
   They do it in the politics too
   
   So nothing is really new
   
   Some people just like contention

   replyreport
5. 85

   SweetiePieposted 14 years ago

   Pigeons can be a lot of fun
   
   When they play in the sun
   
   Are they good pets
   
   Or even good for bets
   
   Pet pigeons are not so fun

   replyreport
6. 79

   earnestshubposted 14 years ago

   As you know, I don't mind a discussion
   but I don't like much verbal percussion
   If I get called a fool
   I break my own rule
   and attack with a word or a muffin

   replyreport
7. 79

   earnestshubposted 14 years ago

   I do come on strong in the forum
   some say that I'm lacking decorum
   But i would like to say
   at the end of the day
   that at least I do try not to bore em!

   replyreport
8. 85

   SweetiePieposted 14 years ago

   Some people insist they must always be right
   
   And they try this with might
   
   They never want to acknowledge
   
   Another person's knowledge
   
   So the only like to start verbal fights

   replyreport
   1. 79

      earnestshubposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      Verbal fights are a bit of a strain
      it seldom involves use of brain
      when they get in the mood
      to insult and be rude
      it's time for me to refrain

      replyreport
9. 79

   earnestshubposted 14 years ago

   wordscribe where are you now,
   in the paddock miking the cow?
   get yourself back in here
   and join in a cheer
   for the impact. we miss your kapow!

   replyreport
10. 85

    SweetiePieposted 14 years ago

    I know the arguments are a time suck
    
    But sometimes I get stuck
    
    Other days I do just fine
    
    For forums I should not pine
    
    I find it discouraging some only pluck

    replyreport
11. 0

    wordscribe41posted 14 years ago

    Pigeons are of Columbidae,
    so dumb they can barely fly.
    Might try one with soup,
    could cause me the croup,
    so maybe I'll stick with the pie.

    replyreport
12. 79

    earnestshubposted 14 years ago

    I'm enjoying this thread with you girls
    your limericks are beautiful pearls
    the wisdom I see
    when you banter with me
    makes my mustache rejoice so it curls.

    replyreport
13. 85

    SweetiePieposted 14 years ago

    You are so very gracious earnest
    
    You are really the best
    
    And always make us smile
    
    I like to be here awhile
    
    This is a forum at its finest

    replyreport
14. 0

    wordscribe41posted 14 years ago

    A friend's curls at times, name's Danica,
    that's why she started her Vaniqua,
    She still has the stubble,
    seen clearly by Hubbell,
    just look it up in Brittanica.

    replyreport
    1. 79

       earnestshubposted 14 years agoin reply to this

       Thats amazing, I wish that I'd seen
       but how in the world did she clean?
       if seen from old Hubble
       she sure is in trouble
       the site of it would be obsene

       replyreport
       1. 0

          wordscribe41posted 14 years agoin reply to this

          The sight was nothing to believe,
          Occasionally I'd let out a heave,
          an endocrine disease,
          not cleaned with ease,
          enough hair to appropriately weave!

          replyreport
15. 0

    wordscribe41posted 14 years ago

    Earnest, get off that forum!
    Don't you by now abhor 'em?
    We need you right here,
    you and your beard,
    plus, we're a much finer quorum.

    replyreport
    1. 79

       earnestshubposted 14 years agoin reply to this

       I'll try to stay just on this forum
       to keep all my words I will store em
       I have sparingly chose
       to put rings in my nose
       to make sure that I don't go and gore em!

       replyreport
16. 79

    earnestshubposted 14 years ago

    I once made my mustache just like Dali
    while riding around on my Harley
    when I road over fifty
    the ends got quite nifty
    and curled to look more like Svengali.

    replyreport
17. 0

    wordscribe41posted 14 years ago

    Last time I rode was on a Honda,
    Hair blowing and breezy like Fonda's,
    I rode on the back,
    had a heart attack,
    he gunned it all the way to Kwanda.

    replyreport
18. 85

    SweetiePieposted 14 years ago

    My hair can curl very easily when I set it
    
    But the hassle is a fit
    
    So usually it is straight
    
    Except on certain dates
    
    Then I might actually tease the heck out of it

    replyreport
19. 79

    earnestshubposted 14 years ago

    I had a bike shop once you know
    so I rode in the sun and the snow
    Honda is best
    makes a joke of the rest
    and Harley's are clumsy and slow

    replyreport
20. 79

    marcofratelliposted 14 years ago

    I'm back, but I'll be in and out
    Cause you know I'm a rhymer devout
    Put a link to the forum
    In a tweet, there before 'em
    So they'll join us in minutes no doubt
    
    I'm just busy researching a house
    A place we're I'll live with my spouse
    Cause as soon as I get one
    The bedroom's where we'll have fun
    Action: rabbits, Sound: quiet as a mouse

    replyreport
    1. 0

       wordscribe41posted 14 years agoin reply to this

       House-hunting is fun for a second,
       frustrating in this economy, I reckon.
       The bedroom's the pinnacle,
       avoid one that's clinical,
       since there you will grow an erection.

       replyreport
       1. 79

          earnestshubposted 14 years agoin reply to this

          I knew you could not keep it clean
          your sweet little mind is obscene!
          just the thought of a bed
          will be turning your head
          to the bedroom where all can be seen.

          replyreport
          1. 0

             wordscribe41posted 14 years agoin reply to this

             I stayed pure as long as I could.
             'Twas Marco who hinted at wood,
             I'm normally prude,
             not so awfully rude,
             Golly, I'm so misunderstood.

             replyreport
    2. 79

       earnestshubposted 14 years agoin reply to this

       I'm happy you've found a new dwelling
       I need the address if your telling
       I can come round your house
       like a regular souse
       and watch while you do all the selling

       replyreport
    3. 0

       wordscribe41posted 14 years agoin reply to this

       So, where are these twittery tweeters?
       Expected they'd pour in by litres,
       Tweet-worthy this is,
       minus words like the "jizz"
       and others referring to peters.

       replyreport
21. 79

    earnestshubposted 14 years ago

    Her top lip must have been strong
    to support a mustache that's so long
    I image she can
    make a fool of a man
    who has less face hair than has king kong!

    replyreport
22. 79

    marcofratelliposted 14 years ago

    Yeah sorry about all that innuendo
    From arousal to the ending crescendo
    But like I said on this thread
    I will wait til I'm wed
    Off again to play with my "nintendo"

    replyreport
23. 79

    earnestshubposted 14 years ago

    I think you are understood well
    any red blooded male can tell
    you are hotter than mustard
    when covered in custard
    as long as it's licked off as well!

    replyreport
    1. 0

       wordscribe41posted 14 years agoin reply to this

       That sounds like a plan, any takers?
       I suppose it would interest the bakers.
       Mustard is spicy,
       custard is dicey,
       surely not a job for the quakers.

       replyreport
       1. 79

          marcofratelliposted 14 years agoin reply to this

          My hands in the air way too swiftly
          I've been waving since 22:50
          And I'm talkin' last night
          Do you need some egg white?
          I like it shaken, not stirred... and quickly!

          replyreport
          1. 0

             wordscribe41posted 14 years agoin reply to this

             Egg carton is on the counter,
             I'm rippin' it open, won't flounder.
             I shimmy and shake,
             pop it in for the bake,
             and ready it for the encounter.

             replyreport
24. 79

    earnestshubposted 14 years ago

    yes we need all the people from twitter
    especially any hard hitter
    who can give us advice
    on how to be nice
    and to stop me from mentioning shitter.

    replyreport
25. 79

    earnestshubposted 14 years ago

    wordscribe you are going quite well
    all that work is starting to tell
    your scores 94
    tho I know you want more
    it leaves my 91 a hard sell

    replyreport
    1. 0

       wordscribe41posted 14 years agoin reply to this

       Have you noticed 9-7 below?
       Man, he's all aglow.
       He deserves the score,
       his hubs I adore.
       'bout gravel, well now I know!

       replyreport
26. 0

    wordscribe41posted 14 years ago

    It was ninety nine for a spell,
    then it went to bloody Hell,
    fine, it's a 9-4,
    it's somewhat of a bore,
    but I don't want my head to swell.

    replyreport
27. 79

    earnestshubposted 14 years ago

    I once got it to 99
    I was having a fabulous time
    then it went way back down
    so I gave up my crown
    and decided I'd need to do rhyme.

    replyreport
28. 0

    wordscribe41posted 14 years ago

    On Amazon I'm making fine sales,
    hubs about mammals with tails.
    I'll never get rich,
    hubs is a bitch,
    but at least it will pay for my nails.

    replyreport
29. 79

    marcofratelliposted 14 years ago

    And after that I think I'll get banned
    If enforced you know I'll understand
    I like humour attesting
    To something suggesting
    Otherwise all my rhymes will be bland

    replyreport
30. 79

    earnestshubposted 14 years ago

    Marco welcome glad your back here
    we should celebrate with a beer
    the rhymes make me dry
    put a tear in me eye
    If I'm drunk I can handle my fear.
    
    You are here with wordscribe which is cute
    just don't climb in the back of the ute
    because by your doing
    all that naked cooing
    We'll be banned and that just wouldn't suit.

    replyreport
31. 0

    wordscribe41posted 14 years ago

    Getting banned just wouldn't be cool,
    innuendos will have to rule,
    it can still be exciting,
    and a little delighting,
    but unlike the ones where we drool.

    replyreport
32. 79

    marcofratelliposted 14 years ago

    Thanks Earnest but I'll have me a cider
    In Australia I'll feel an outsider
    All the blokes like their beer
    "Strongbow" I volunteer
    I don't care when their eyes get abit wider

    replyreport
33. 79

    earnestshubposted 14 years ago

    Now I must be off to bed
    I need sleep after all that I've said
    having written all day
    I will now hit the hay
    so tomorrow I'll still have some cred.
    
    Goodnight my wonderfully entertaining friends!

    replyreport
34. 71

    HubChiefposted 14 years ago

    wow, 50 limericks directly addressed
    you guys are really blessed
    we keep writing all these
    either standing or on knees
    none of them look tiny messed

    replyreport
35. 0

    Ghost32posted 14 years ago

    Just studying how to Hub Score
    Taught me that I'll never have more
    Since part of the task
    Is writing to ask
    Know-it-all me would find that a bore
    
    A Request can be made by the curious
    But that would make me simply furious
    Any answer at all
    Can be found with a call
    Or a Search but not Bing, which is spurious

    replyreport
36. 63

    Drew Breezzyposted 14 years ago

    ok i am going in
    
    correct me if i am wrong
    
    
    a mouse ran up my pants
    
    I started to shake and dance
    
    didn't know what to do
    
    So I just threw
    
    The mouse overseas to france

    replyreport
37. 0

    wordscribe41posted 14 years ago

    Drew's getting in the limerick mix,
    of these I've had my fix.
    Beware they're addicting,
    Obsession inflicting!
    And they have five lines, not six.

    replyreport
38. 63

    Drew Breezzyposted 14 years ago

    Limericks are short as my temper
    Yell shout scream my dog whimpers
    Hot headed 212 temperature
    so sick too sick in need of a cure
    Remember when life was simpler
    December the past is a blur

    replyreport
39. 88

    RedElfposted 14 years ago

    Don't wish the snow back, Mr. Breezy;
    To cavil at heat's way too easy;
    Your temp'rature's up,
    But your verses seem stuck
    In a rut - have a beer! Would that please ye?
    
    I don't wish to come off as "preachy",
    But summer up north is just peachy;
    But we plow through the snow here
    At thirty below, dear,
    For for almost six months of the year - see?

    replyreport
40. 79

    earnestshubposted 14 years ago

    The weather you have is appalling!
    the thought of it has my skin crawling
    If I got cold as that
    I would need so much fat
    my body would miss it's real calling.

    replyreport
41. 88

    RedElfposted 14 years ago

    I may have misspoke 'bout our weather;
    It's really quite lovely today, here;
    In WINTER we suffer,
    From drifts high and fluffy,
    So "don't wish it back" 's all I say, dear.

    replyreport
42. 79

    earnestshubposted 14 years ago

    I'm glad you have sunshine today
    I'll try not to spook it away
    if it gets really hot
    which I gather it's not
    I will come over their for a stay.

    replyreport
43. 0

    wordscribe41posted 14 years ago

    Been 105 here for most of 2 weeks,
    I'm hating these temperature peeks.
    Beats the rainy season,
    rain's good within reason,
    but the cities in Oregon become creeks!

    replyreport
    1. 63

       Drew Breezzyposted 14 years agoin reply to this

       I love eugene oregon thats where my man marv stays
       
       He is a singer song writer live music he plays
       
       Alternative hip hop
       
       In his flip flops
       
       He is all that and a bag of lays

       replyreport
       1. 0

          wordscribe41posted 14 years agoin reply to this

          Eugene is a peace loving scene,
          full of hippies and those very green,
          Women have hairy pits,
          and go into fits,
          If leather, not pleather is seen.

          replyreport
          1. 79

             earnestshubposted 14 years agoin reply to this

             I've never been to Eugene
             I imagine that it is the scene
             for a lot of dope smoking
             humping and toking
             so to visit? You bet I am keen.

             replyreport
             1. 0

                wordscribe41posted 14 years agoin reply to this

                Back in the day I did toke,
                grabbed a few beers and had a smoke.
                Joined PETA a while,
                saved a crocodile,
                and said stuff like: "Dude, I'm stoked!"

                replyreport
                1. 79

                   earnestshubposted 14 years agoin reply to this

                   I remember the old hippy days
                   not well, because of the haze
                   but it was very nice
                   I did everything twice
                   and with girls too cos that was the craze

                   replyreport
                   1. 0

                      wordscribe41posted 14 years agoin reply to this

                      I'm still a little granola,
                      I've traded ETOH for coca cola,
                      I loved being care-free,
                      tying myself to trees,
                      and dancing naked as I played my viola.

                      replyreport
                      1. 79

                         earnestshubposted 14 years agoin reply to this

                         I play guitar, not viola
                         though I no longer play for payola
                         but it perks up my fingers
                         the melody lingers
                         I can feel it for hours in my molar

                         replyreport
44. 68

    lrohnerposted 14 years ago

    The summer months are now half gone,
    I still have to go mow the lawn,
    I do need to garden,
    So please give me pardon,
    I don't work until freaking dawn!

    replyreport
    1. 79

       earnestshubposted 14 years agoin reply to this

       
       Our summer has not started yet
       and I am beginning to fret
       for those long lazy days
       in a heat ridden haze
       eating ice cream and jelly thats set

       replyreport
       1. 68

          lrohnerposted 14 years agoin reply to this

          Oh why is your summer not there?
          I hope not because of my hair.
          In the warm of the summer,
          My hair is a bummer,
          Not something that I want to wear.

          replyreport
          1. 79

             earnestshubposted 14 years agoin reply to this

             Well you see I am from down under
             your hair is not it if you wonder
             below the equator
             Summer's much later
             it is also the time we get thunder.

             replyreport
       2. 68

          lrohnerposted 14 years agoin reply to this

          Be happy your days are still cool,
          You won't have to go clean the pool,
          Enjoy what you got,
          I'd love it a lot,
          And that ice cream is making me drool!

          replyreport
          1. 0

             L. Andrew Marrposted 14 years agoin reply to this

             I've wasted my summer, that's sure,
             Writing hubs is now seeming a bore.
             My brain has run dry
             Which could explain why
             I'm writing this instead of doing my chores.

             replyreport
45. 71

    HubChiefposted 14 years ago

    the weekend started once again
    smiles are back, gone is pain
    kitchen project done half way
    futon coming tomorrow to stay
    the week closed with stock market gain

    replyreport
46. 66

    Pearldiverposted 14 years ago

    A Jolly Green Giant was known to say
    "I Need a Break; Maybe today,"
    So she asked for advice from us all
    But would a giant listen to our call?
    Nope! "Through work; I know not; how to play!"

    replyreport
    1. 0

       wordscribe41posted 14 years agoin reply to this

       I took a break for a few hours,
       was overcome by artistic powers.
       I play limericks for fun,
       enjoy a good pun,
       and even practice them in my showers.

       replyreport
       1. 79

          earnestshubposted 14 years agoin reply to this

          I do that too in the shower
          it gives me my magical power
          so that I can rhyme
          for an instant in time
          and keep myself happy for hours

          replyreport
       2. 66

          Pearldiverposted 14 years agoin reply to this

          Interesting that here you claim
          that simple limericks are to blame
          Are you sure the break was long enough?
          I mean what about the family stuff?
          It's a hard thing to handle; all this fame!

          replyreport
          1. 0

             wordscribe41posted 14 years agoin reply to this

             The fame is hard to deal with,
             the gossip, tabloids, and the myths.
             But my fans await me,
             and scream like banshees
             if I quit being a brilliant wordsmith.  *sighs*

             replyreport
             1. 79

                earnestshubposted 14 years agoin reply to this

                
                Your wordsmithery is certainly fine
                I suspect that it's better than mine
                fame is the price
                for being so nice
                and wordsmithering well all of the time!

                replyreport
47. 0

    wordscribe41posted 14 years ago

    I'm taking these posts to five hundred,
    "She'll even do it alone", she thundered.
    This thread's smokin' hot,
    and no one will be caught
    saying:  "Man, this threads been plundered."

    replyreport
    1. 79

       earnestshubposted 14 years agoin reply to this

       The plundering can only be fine
       if it is your work or mine
       we can plunder away
       till the end of the day
       while taking a break all the time.

       replyreport
48. 66

    Pearldiverposted 14 years ago

    Oh, I see it is just a Leo thing
    Silly me; of course you'll make it sing
    But take care of yourself in your quest for wealth
    For a Lion can rely on far more than stealth
    You can sell your smile; to earn the bling!

    replyreport
49. 79

    marcofratelliposted 14 years ago

    You guys still rhyming? This is hilarious!
    The situation's becoming synonymous
    With words like 'addiction'
    Now here's my prediction
    You'll join me soon: Limericks Anonymous

    replyreport
    1. 0

       wordscribe41posted 14 years agoin reply to this

       L.A. I must join straight away!
       This is taking up too much of my day.
       I'll start the meetings,
       if you do the greetings,
       Welcome to Limericks A.

       replyreport
50. 60

    Colebabieposted 14 years ago

    Just got home from work pretty tired
    This party is still pretty wired
    But I've made my money,
    going to bed with my honey
    Maybe tomorrow I'll be more inspired.
    
    

    replyreport