Been a long road...

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   paradigmsearchposted 5 years ago

   AMD has hit the point where I am soon not going to play here anymore. I realize that this is a sigh of relief for many. It was fun. And I did make it to 68 years old. Yes, I am familiar with ctrl+. @HP You were a true godsend these last 8 years. Not only the money, but the friendship and camaraderie of the last 6-7 years; they are "all" new people and strangers now. This is not a sign-off, I don't know when that will be.

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      Victoria Lynnposted 5 years agoin reply to this

      Wow, paradigmsearch, 8 years! I've been here nearly 7, and I think I've followed you most or all of my time here. I haven't written anything here in about four years, but I still check in now and then to see any comments, read a few hubs, and check my stats. I still get payout every month or every other month, so that's cool. I don't see any reason to totally leave, and I may even write again at some point. Do you see a reason to sign off permanently? I hope you decide to pop in now and then even if you are away more than usual. :-)

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         makingamarkposted 5 years agoin reply to this

         When paradigmsearch references AMD, I think she is referring to age-related macular degeneration - as in significant eyesight deterioration.
         
         As in not "checking out" or "leaving in a huff"
         just unable to continue to view a computer screen in a meaningful way.
         
         Am I right?

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            paradigmsearchposted 5 years agoin reply to this

            I read your post several times to make sure. "just unable to continue to view a computer screen in a meaningful way." is true.
            
            We can't import as before, so shall do so here.
            
            Victoria Lynn, thank you.
            
            Butterfly, it's been going on for a decade. It's finally hit.
            
            makingamark. Am giving you the benefit of the doubt.

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               makingamarkposted 5 years agoin reply to this

               What on earth do I need the benefit of the doubt for?
               Last time I try interpreting other people's extremely opaque posts to avoid misunderstandings by others in future.
               
               The way you phrased it could have been interpreted that you had a terminal illness for goodness sake!!!
               
               All you needed to say is "I am going blind and I don't know how much longer I'll be able to continue on Hubpages - but it's going to be sooner rather than later"

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                  paradigmsearchposted 5 years agoin reply to this

                  Deleted
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            Victoria Lynnposted 5 years agoin reply to this

            OH! I didn't know what AMD was! Sorry I missed that! That makes total sense now. :-)

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               paradigmsearchposted 5 years agoin reply to this

               You are right. I should have said "blind". Serious. Only those of the last would have known; I've got to get quit living in the past.

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      Christy Kirwanposted 5 years agoin reply to this

      Very sorry to hear that you are unwell. Hopefully you'll be able to find a reading/dictation app you like to help you stay active online. Either way it will be a huge adjustment. Wishing you the best.

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         paradigmsearchposted 5 years agoin reply to this

         Thank you very much for responding.

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      Randy Godwinposted 5 years agoin reply to this

      Dammit Para, you haven't told me that! I knew you had vision problems, as I have, but you didn't tell me you were having problems this bad.

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         paradigmsearchposted 5 years agoin reply to this

         Spots, everything has gone to hell. True crap.

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            Randy Godwinposted 5 years agoin reply to this

            I'm now depressed...

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               paradigmsearchposted 5 years agoin reply to this

               Thank you, how to vicious turn this around?

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      liesl5858posted 5 years agoin reply to this

      Paradigmsearch, I am sorry to hear you got AMD. It can be frustrating sometimes for people with AMD condition but I hope with all the new inventions, the doctors or opticians can do something to help you. I work with the blind people and everyday I can see their difficulties but I know you are a strong person and you can overcome this.

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      GwennyOhposted 5 years agoin reply to this

      I am truly sorry to hear that this is how it is for you. I hope that your future projects are in line with your drathers and desires.

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      TIMETRAVELER2posted 5 years agoin reply to this

      I've been in touch with Marisa Wright.  She wanted me to tell you that she feels terrible about your situation and wishes you well in the future.

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   Butterfly67posted 5 years ago

   I had to Google AMD, sorry to hear that, hope it does not get too bad for you.

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   paradigmsearchposted 5 years ago

   I am male.

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   paradigmsearchposted 5 years ago

   Three needle-in-the-eye shots. Mark has made me defensive. HP does not allow me to do combat.

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      DzyMsLizzyposted 5 years agoin reply to this

      OWWWWWCCCHHHHIIIEEEEE!!!!!!!!

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   paradigmsearchposted 5 years ago

   A rant. Seen the daily news. What has happened is not fairly serious in the scheme of things. But seriously, got to finally reaching blindness is a serious thing.

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      Patty Inglish, MSposted 5 years agoin reply to this

      I am sorry to know your sight loss has worsened and I will miss you if you leave HP. You probably don't want to hear about new treatments for AMD in the pipeline - All that does not help you right now and we'll all be 140 years old maybe when they are perfected. Anyway, take care and you'll be missed.

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         paradigmsearchposted 5 years agoin reply to this

         Yes.

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            Barbara Kayposted 5 years agoin reply to this

            I am sorry to hear that paradigmsearch. One of my  sisters has it. We'll miss you terribly. I've been here for 8 years and I know you have been around all this time.

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   paradigmsearchposted 5 years ago

   Dreams are not reality.

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      Kathryn L Hillposted 5 years agoin reply to this

      - who can resist ...

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         Kathryn L Hillposted 5 years agoin reply to this

         reality?

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   Kenna McHughposted 5 years ago

   You are in my positive thoughts. I love your replies to my Quote of the Day. I am sure there is a way to stay active online. I am hoping for the best!

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   paradigmsearchposted 5 years ago

   Fu marky. I am banned. Why aren't you?

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   paradigmsearchposted 5 years ago

   Tangle foot, I still see, denial, blowing in the wind, spots, amd, I can see this, but not see this, can you imagine this, do you imagine this, can you imagine the punctuation, can you imagine, the brain, being allowed sight, and being denied, and being slowly taken away from you, and finally being done.

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      Victoria Lynnposted 5 years agoin reply to this

      I am so sorry. That sounds like an awful thing to deal with. Words can't express . . . .

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         paradigmsearchposted 5 years agoin reply to this

         Thank you. I am just dealing and playing and quieting with it. (spellchecker)

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    paradigmsearchposted 5 years ago

    Trite omg, hp forums a mess

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    paradigmsearchposted 5 years ago

    @HP Male. Are you serious you did not know that?

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    paradigmsearchposted 5 years ago

    War as am blind. It's what I do. Am I allowed?

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    jansharesposted 5 years ago

    You know you're one of my favorites, right? Hate to hear you going through this, para. Ugh! You are a part of the crew that made this place fun when I came on almost 6 years ago. I hope you're able to hang around for a little while longer. Peace and blessings.

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       paradigmsearchposted 5 years agoin reply to this

       Agreed. What does one do?

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    CMHypnoposted 5 years ago

    Forums won't be the same without you Para!  Not been around much lately, but you are one of the constants in this place.  My thoughts and prayers are with you.

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    FatFreddysCatposted 5 years ago

    Sorry to hear of your troubles, para. You have raised the bar high when it comes to forum surrealism for us all, and for that I salute thee.

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    lobobrandonposted 5 years ago

    You will be missed PD. You're definitely one of my favourite people here. Every time you were banned I waited patiently until the ban was lifted haha. I'm on vacation right now but I'm glad I checked in. I hope you read this. Good luck and I wish you the best.

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    Susana Sposted 5 years ago

    Sorry to hear this PD. You are part of this place!
    Are there no accessibility options that would enable you to stay?

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    paradigmsearchposted 5 years ago

    Thank you, everyone, for your replies. For the record; this is not a self-pity party, it is a rant-at-reality party. Where I live, pretty much everyone is fckd: wheel chairs, urine bag strapped to leg, fear for safety, etc. As for blindness, the only thing worse is unremitting pain, leastwise I don't have that. What I am typing here is full of white spots, so probably full of inaccuracies; but red-line underneath helps a lot. I reiterate my feelings for HP: guys, you have no idea how much you have contributed to society; my guess is you have helped more people than you will ever know.

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       lobobrandonposted 5 years agoin reply to this

       The last sentence

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       jansharesposted 5 years agoin reply to this

       

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    paradigmsearchposted 5 years ago

    Am still able to do at ctrl+5-6. Odd how I still need social contact, some/most just wrap up in a ball.

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       Peggy Wposted 5 years agoin reply to this

       We all need social contacts and it is amazing how we get to feel connected with people on this site over time.  I am truly sorry to hear about your vision problems.  You would be missed on this site by many people.

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    Dolores Monetposted 5 years ago

    I am sorry to hear that you are going through this, that you are being so robbed. Many of us, as we age, find that life does not deal us a fair hand. I hope that you find something new, a new way to express yourself. Though we have not really chatted, I have often read your posts. I can't see you just disappearing into the void. I hope you use your voice to insite and inspire. I hope you hear new music and birdsong. I hope that suffering strengthens your soul and that your creativity and panache help you find a new path.

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    AliciaCposted 5 years ago

    I’m sorry about your sight problems. I hope you find some accessibility options that enable you to continue using a computer. You would be missed very much if you left.

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    LongTimeMotherposted 5 years ago

    Hi Para. I don't know if I can help you or not, but I'll give it a try. I was forced to wear glasses since my 40s. Eyesight was so crap I couldn't even read street signs without them, or the big letters saying 'shampoo' or 'conditioner' when taking a shower. Wore very expensive glasses with 'graduating' lenses to help me see both close and far away.
    
    As you know, I'm a nutty old woman who grows and uses medicinal herbs. Long story short, I've had no need for glasses for the past six years. I can read fine print in our phone book and successfully play Angry Birds on my phone without specs. My eyesight is better than it has ever been.
    
    Will the same herbs help for AMD? I don't know. But I sure reckon they're worth a try. So here's what I suggest. You email me your street address and I'll source the herbs on your side of the world and have them sent to you. If I can't find them in the US, I'll arrange to have some seeds sent to you from Australia. I know a woman with a license to export them overseas. (I don't have a license, so I can't post you them from my garden, sadly.)
    
    If you get the seeds, you'll have to grow the plants. But hopefully I can find the actual plants in your part of the world and have them delivered.
    
    So ... if you're prepared to try using them, I'll do my best to get them to you. No guarantees they'll work for you, but I'm thinking it is a much better idea than doing nothing.  We need to keep you active on HP!!
    
    LTM

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       theraggededgeposted 5 years agoin reply to this

       That sounds fascinating. My eyesight's getting bad, can you give us more information, or can I contact you? I'm in the UK and can source the seeds/plant myself.

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          LongTimeMotherposted 5 years agoin reply to this

          Sure. Contact me via email and I'll put some notes together.

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