How do you calm a screaming two year old?

Jump to Last Post 1-11 of 11 discussions (15 posts)
  1. AustralianNappies profile image86
    AustralianNappiesposted 6 years ago

    How do you calm a screaming two year old?

    For example screaming and having a tantrum over something they cannot have.

  2. Diana Grant profile image91
    Diana Grantposted 6 years ago

    Use diversionary tactics - maybe a kiss and cuddle, and showing him or her something interesting or fun to take their mind off whatever is upsetting them.

  3. ThePracticalMommy profile image93
    ThePracticalMommyposted 6 years ago

    I just had this problem yesterday. Distraction always seems to work best. When my daughter was having a tantrum, I took out my phone and took a picture of her with the flash on. It surprised her, and then she wanted to see the picture, completely forgetting about what she wanted.

    Another thing that works is removing the audience. If nothing stops my daughter from her tantrum, I simply walk away and ask her brother to leave the room as well (when we're at home, of course). Without an audience, she has no reason to throw a fit.

    1. Patty Inglish, MS profile image92
      Patty Inglish, MSposted 6 years agoin reply to this

      That also works with adults. smile  Rated your answer Up.

    2. AustralianNappies profile image86
      AustralianNappiesposted 6 years agoin reply to this

      Thanks for some useful tips!

  4. johnr54 profile image44
    johnr54posted 6 years ago

    You ignore them.  Walk out of the room they are in (after making sure they will be safe).  This calms you and will make them realize you are not going to pay attention to their antics.  The other way is to distract them from the problem, if that is possible in their state of mind.  Good luck!

  5. LauraGT profile image90
    LauraGTposted 6 years ago

    My kids are not big tantrum throwers, but when they are crying unreasonably, I tell them they have a choice: they can stop crying or go cry in the other room until they are ready to stop and join the rest of us.  They usually stop crying or go screaming into the other room until they realize it's no fun to cry alone (usually less than a minute) and come back, with big sniffles.

  6. LeanMan profile image87
    LeanManposted 6 years ago

    I always find that diverting their attention works best, my son (now 21) had a tantrum in the local supermarket over some sweets when he was just over two, he was completely out of control sat on the floor screaming as loud as he could..

    So I did the same much to the total embarrassment of his mother who walked away as quickly as she could.. but it worked! He hugged me and wanted me to stand up and go follow mummy! Raised a lot of smiles also..

    My current nipper just has to be told to come look at the lizards and he completely forgets everything that was going on and starts doing lizard impressions but he is still only 15 months..

  7. LongTimeMother profile image94
    LongTimeMotherposted 6 years ago

    Here's my suggestion. It worked a treat with my children and I've demonstrated it to others with similar success ...

    Create a diversion by pulling a surprised face and saying "Show me your leg. Did a dog bite you? No, a dog didn't bite you. Show me your hand. Do you have yucky blood on your finger? No, you don't have a sore finger."

    You can carry this on with different parts of their body for as long as it takes to get their attention, adding a few tickles along the way while looking for the injury that must be making them cry. As long as you're in private you could add "Have you got ants in your pants that are biting your bottom?" Encourage them to help you look at the part of their body you are mentioning.

    Once they've calmed down, say "You can cry if a dog bites you. And you can cry if you have ants in your pants that are biting your bottom ... but you don't cry now. Crying now is silly."

    If they start screaming again it is time to say "No ... crying now is silly. We don't want to listen to silly crying," and leave them without an audience.

    If it happens again, repeat the process. You'll be surprised how quickly even a young child gets the message. It didn't take long before I could pull a surprised face and ask "Did a dog bite you?" or "Is this silly crying?" and my child would stop immediately. I'd reward them with "We don't want silly crying, do we? Come and give me a cuddle."

    I think many people underestimate the intelligence of two-year-olds and their ability to learn. I also suspect many parents look at their screaming four-year-olds and regret not addressing the issue effectively when they were two. I believe it is best to wait until you get positive behaviour before you offer any kind of reward. The trick is to make them laugh along the way and reinforce what you consider to be appropriate and inappropriate behaviour so they learn what you expect from them.

    Good luck. smile

    1. AustralianNappies profile image86
      AustralianNappiesposted 6 years agoin reply to this

      Great tips I'll definately try this!

  8. Cantuhearmescream profile image77
    Cantuhearmescreamposted 6 years ago

    Positive, positive, positive!!! I have always found that children respond in a more positive manner to positive discipline rather than negative reprimanding. Give a compliment sandwich; state something firm and positive, then the reason why he/she can't have their way for the particular incident and then wrap it up with another positive, like you are so proud of how he/she is responding. Then, move on. Don't let the child consume a large amount of time with him/her behaving inappropriately. If you are in a store and the child will not give up, I would remove the child from the store, go to your vehicle and tell him/her you will not continue shopping until he/she agrees that they will behave appropriately. Then maybe as a reward for good behavior at the end of the shopping trip the child can get a $1.00 item. Praising positive behavior goes so much further than letting your child see the disappointment in negative behavior. Children live to please.

  9. Peter Leeper profile image78
    Peter Leeperposted 6 years ago

    I have found that teaching them to take "deep breaths" can be useful...mine often tries to do this when at the tail end of a tantrum and even tells me he is trying to do it but is having trouble calming down...I think it helps because it gets them to focus on something else then the fit they are having.  Especially since they usually forget why they are so upset...

    1. AustralianNappies profile image86
      AustralianNappiesposted 6 years agoin reply to this

      That's an interesting idea thanks for sharing it!

  10. LucyLiu12 profile image85
    LucyLiu12posted 6 years ago

    I would try distraction, a car ride, or a warm bath.

  11. peachpurple profile image82
    peachpurpleposted 6 years ago

    I hate when my kid scream and throws tantrum especially in the public places. Hence, I tried to hug him, carry him and give him his favorite hanky to clam him down. It words but takes at least 10minutes of constant persuading. Spanking and scolding him will cause more agony to both sides. I wrote a hub about Toddler tantrums. maybe you would like to read it … R-TANTRUMS


This website uses cookies

As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at:

Show Details
HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the or domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)
ClickscoThis is a data management platform studying reader behavior (Privacy Policy)