How do you calm a screaming two year old?

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  1. AustralianNappies profile image80
    AustralianNappiesposted 11 years ago

    How do you calm a screaming two year old?

    For example screaming and having a tantrum over something they cannot have.

  2. Diana Grant profile image90
    Diana Grantposted 11 years ago

    Use diversionary tactics - maybe a kiss and cuddle, and showing him or her something interesting or fun to take their mind off whatever is upsetting them.

  3. ThePracticalMommy profile image88
    ThePracticalMommyposted 11 years ago

    I just had this problem yesterday. Distraction always seems to work best. When my daughter was having a tantrum, I took out my phone and took a picture of her with the flash on. It surprised her, and then she wanted to see the picture, completely forgetting about what she wanted.

    Another thing that works is removing the audience. If nothing stops my daughter from her tantrum, I simply walk away and ask her brother to leave the room as well (when we're at home, of course). Without an audience, she has no reason to throw a fit.

    1. Patty Inglish, MS profile image87
      Patty Inglish, MSposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      That also works with adults. smile  Rated your answer Up.

    2. AustralianNappies profile image80
      AustralianNappiesposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      Thanks for some useful tips!

  4. johnr54 profile image49
    johnr54posted 11 years ago

    You ignore them.  Walk out of the room they are in (after making sure they will be safe).  This calms you and will make them realize you are not going to pay attention to their antics.  The other way is to distract them from the problem, if that is possible in their state of mind.  Good luck!

  5. LauraGT profile image85
    LauraGTposted 11 years ago

    My kids are not big tantrum throwers, but when they are crying unreasonably, I tell them they have a choice: they can stop crying or go cry in the other room until they are ready to stop and join the rest of us.  They usually stop crying or go screaming into the other room until they realize it's no fun to cry alone (usually less than a minute) and come back, with big sniffles.

  6. LeanMan profile image79
    LeanManposted 11 years ago

    I always find that diverting their attention works best, my son (now 21) had a tantrum in the local supermarket over some sweets when he was just over two, he was completely out of control sat on the floor screaming as loud as he could..

    So I did the same much to the total embarrassment of his mother who walked away as quickly as she could.. but it worked! He hugged me and wanted me to stand up and go follow mummy! Raised a lot of smiles also..

    My current nipper just has to be told to come look at the lizards and he completely forgets everything that was going on and starts doing lizard impressions but he is still only 15 months..

  7. LongTimeMother profile image91
    LongTimeMotherposted 11 years ago

    Here's my suggestion. It worked a treat with my children and I've demonstrated it to others with similar success ...

    Create a diversion by pulling a surprised face and saying "Show me your leg. Did a dog bite you? No, a dog didn't bite you. Show me your hand. Do you have yucky blood on your finger? No, you don't have a sore finger."

    You can carry this on with different parts of their body for as long as it takes to get their attention, adding a few tickles along the way while looking for the injury that must be making them cry. As long as you're in private you could add "Have you got ants in your pants that are biting your bottom?" Encourage them to help you look at the part of their body you are mentioning.

    Once they've calmed down, say "You can cry if a dog bites you. And you can cry if you have ants in your pants that are biting your bottom ... but you don't cry now. Crying now is silly."

    If they start screaming again it is time to say "No ... crying now is silly. We don't want to listen to silly crying," and leave them without an audience.

    If it happens again, repeat the process. You'll be surprised how quickly even a young child gets the message. It didn't take long before I could pull a surprised face and ask "Did a dog bite you?" or "Is this silly crying?" and my child would stop immediately. I'd reward them with "We don't want silly crying, do we? Come and give me a cuddle."

    I think many people underestimate the intelligence of two-year-olds and their ability to learn. I also suspect many parents look at their screaming four-year-olds and regret not addressing the issue effectively when they were two. I believe it is best to wait until you get positive behaviour before you offer any kind of reward. The trick is to make them laugh along the way and reinforce what you consider to be appropriate and inappropriate behaviour so they learn what you expect from them.

    Good luck. smile

    1. AustralianNappies profile image80
      AustralianNappiesposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      Great tips I'll definately try this!

  8. Cantuhearmescream profile image76
    Cantuhearmescreamposted 11 years ago

    Positive, positive, positive!!! I have always found that children respond in a more positive manner to positive discipline rather than negative reprimanding. Give a compliment sandwich; state something firm and positive, then the reason why he/she can't have their way for the particular incident and then wrap it up with another positive, like you are so proud of how he/she is responding. Then, move on. Don't let the child consume a large amount of time with him/her behaving inappropriately. If you are in a store and the child will not give up, I would remove the child from the store, go to your vehicle and tell him/her you will not continue shopping until he/she agrees that they will behave appropriately. Then maybe as a reward for good behavior at the end of the shopping trip the child can get a $1.00 item. Praising positive behavior goes so much further than letting your child see the disappointment in negative behavior. Children live to please.

  9. Peter Leeper profile image60
    Peter Leeperposted 11 years ago

    I have found that teaching them to take "deep breaths" can be useful...mine often tries to do this when at the tail end of a tantrum and even tells me he is trying to do it but is having trouble calming down...I think it helps because it gets them to focus on something else then the fit they are having.  Especially since they usually forget why they are so upset...

    1. AustralianNappies profile image80
      AustralianNappiesposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      That's an interesting idea thanks for sharing it!

  10. LucyLiu12 profile image74
    LucyLiu12posted 11 years ago

    I would try distraction, a car ride, or a warm bath.

  11. peachpurple profile image82
    peachpurpleposted 11 years ago

    I hate when my kid scream and throws tantrum especially in the public places. Hence, I tried to hug him, carry him and give him his favorite hanky to clam him down. It words but takes at least 10minutes of constant persuading. Spanking and scolding him will cause more agony to both sides. I wrote a hub about Toddler tantrums. maybe you would like to read it
    http://peachpurple.hubpages.com/hub/TOD … R-TANTRUMS

 
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