Your father's favorite maxim?

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   Joelle Burnetteposted 14 years ago

   My dad always has some pithy comment to sum up a situation. One of his favorites is, "Rich or poor, it's nice to have money."
   
   What are some of your family favorites?

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      dutchman1951posted 14 years agoin reply to this

      My Grandfather's; After you have eaten Steaks for awhile, beans don't taste so bad!

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      Daniel Carterposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      My dad owned a butcher shop. The company motto was
      "We skin beef, not customers."
      
      I put it in a hub about a lot of other family history turned comedy. So much drama and tragedy at times, but still, so much to laugh about if we let ourselves.

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         emievilposted 14 years agoin reply to this

         Hmmmmm, wonder what happened to make him put up that motto?

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            Daniel Carterposted 14 years agoin reply to this

            It was just his sense of humor. The farmers in the area always laughed about Mr. Carter's motto.

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               emievilposted 14 years agoin reply to this

               At least, they always think of your father when they think of buying beef . Your dad combined good sense of humor and great marketing at the same time.

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   habeeposted 14 years ago

   I live in the Deep South. My dad was always saying,
   
   "Close that door! We can't cool the back yard!"

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   Luciendaskyposted 14 years ago

   My grandpa would always say "deep subject" if there hadn't been any conversation in a while

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   dohn121posted 14 years ago

   Anytime I say something to the tune of, "Hey dad, that's a nice car, huh?"  His response will always be:
   
   "Sure...Can you take it with you [when you die]?"
   
   It's great having a devout Buddhist for a father.

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   Luciendaskyposted 14 years ago

   That is an awesome approach to live dohn!

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   loveofnightposted 14 years ago

   i grew up hearing: a half loaf of bread is better than none

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   dohn121posted 14 years ago

   Thank you, Luciendasky...It's because of him that I always question every purchase I make.  Our world is filled with needless bundles of nothings!  When you think about it, there is very little we need to "survive" including food.  There are many things in this world that are free.  Those are usually the best things too

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   ralwusposted 14 years ago

   You must pay for your sins. If you have already paid, you can ignore this warning.

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      dohn121posted 14 years agoin reply to this

      Sheesh!  That's pretty dark, Charles!  Do you have change for $20?

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      emievilposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      hmmm, that sounds like something out of a credit card company's letter when I'm late for my payment.

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         ralwusposted 14 years agoin reply to this

         LOL, they stole it from me. I am daddy now and grandpa too. Another thing I tell 'em is:
         Seen it all, done it all, can't remember most of it.

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            Daniel Carterposted 14 years agoin reply to this

            Dad used to say,
            "I'll have you know my memory is PERFECT!!! It just doesn't last long."

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            emievilposted 14 years agoin reply to this

            LOL, that's a safe one.
            
            Okay hmmmm. Back to the topic. My father was very strict. He always says "no boyfriend until after college" (shheeesssh). then he will follow it with "after you graduate, you can get married the next day, I won't stop you". (double sheeesssh). come to think of it, how can we get married day after graduation when we can't have boyfriends two days before that?

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               ralwusposted 14 years agoin reply to this

               He ever tell ya to hold an aspirin between yer knees when with a boy?

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                  emievilposted 14 years agoin reply to this

                  LOL nope. He's conservative ya know. Can't discuss those things, might give him a heart attack .

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   ralwusposted 14 years ago

   No, but I also have this:
   Remember to use all fingers when waving at a policeman.

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      Joelle Burnetteposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      Very good advice!

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    rmcrayneposted 14 years ago

    Dad had plenty of sayings, here's one:
    
    There's always gonna be days where everything you touch just turns to s*^t.

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    tantrumposted 14 years ago

    He always said : We all come to life comdemned to death.

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       Daniel Carterposted 14 years agoin reply to this

       [shudder...]
       Creepy cool truth. Should be on the walls of every church and spook alley.
       LOL

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          tantrumposted 14 years agoin reply to this

            But he allways said with a laugh. He thought life was a big joke

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             Daniel Carterposted 14 years agoin reply to this

             That's terribly, awfully, horribly refreshing. And the best part is it's a rub to so many who don't know how to laugh.

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    ralwusposted 14 years ago

    You had a good dad. My last one I promise. hehe I also give this sound advice:
    Santa Claus has the right idea, visit people only once a year.

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       emievilposted 14 years agoin reply to this

       Especially if they're your godchildren

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    ralwusposted 14 years ago

    I would think not. He's lived too I would imagine. He once was young and carefree.

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       emievilposted 14 years agoin reply to this

       Think so but that was like a long time ago for him. He had me when he was already 37 and long gone from his bachelor days .

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    dohn121posted 14 years ago

    Thank you for the fan mail, Ernie   I appreciate it.

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       emievilposted 14 years agoin reply to this

       hey you're welcome. I'm counting two weeks before you have your 500 fans .

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          dohn121posted 14 years agoin reply to this

          That would be pretty amazing!  I hope I don't let you down

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             emievilposted 14 years agoin reply to this

             hehehehe, hope my good luck wishes work again this time. Gotta go, past midnight here already.
             
             Good nite everyone

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                dohn121posted 14 years agoin reply to this

                Night, Ernie!

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                Daniel Carterposted 14 years agoin reply to this

                Night Mary Ellen! Night John Boy!
                Gosh, it's wakee-wakee time here. I need breakfast!

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    andromidaposted 14 years ago

    Please don't waste your time.

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    Pearldiverposted 14 years ago

    "Whatever you do in your life - Don't Abide Fools!" (Woof Woof)

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    frogdroppingposted 14 years ago

    He never followed the maxim rule book. My dad made things up as he went along.
    
    it´s more than just a stick
    
    or
    
    never look down kids. it's always as high as it looks
    
    It's why I'm an idiot

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       ralwusposted 14 years agoin reply to this

       Poor froggy. Did ya listen to him? hehe don't answer.

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    dutchman1951posted 14 years ago

    A Friend of mine is a Model Railroader, on his lay out he has a scale wearhouse building with an advertisement decal on it:
    
    Miracle Chair Co.
    If it's a good chair, its a Miracle!!!!!
    
    
    lol

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    Ghost32posted 14 years ago

    My late father's maxim:
    
    "You're pounding sand down a rathole, kid."
    
    How'd he know we'd end up with pet baby kangaroo rats 12 years after he passed from the planet? 

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    ralwusposted 14 years ago

    All people are born alike, except Republicans and Democrats.

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    rebekahELLEposted 14 years ago

    your ship will come in one day~

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    Crazdwriterposted 14 years ago

    My favorite has to be when either mom or my brother or myself as my dad a question and if my dad doesn't know the asnwer he always made something up. lmao my daddy is a character!

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    ralwusposted 14 years ago

    Dad one day, 1956; I married your mother because I wanted children. Imagine my disappointment when you came along.

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       Joelle Burnetteposted 14 years agoin reply to this

       lol...sounds familiar.

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    dohn121posted 14 years ago

    Friends are like electricity: Used them wisely and you will benefit from having them.  Used them carelessly and they can kill you.
    
    That's probably my all-time favorite from him.

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    tksenseiposted 14 years ago

    I think it's probably this one:
    
    http://www.maxim.com/girls/girls-of-maxim?p=2

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    onthewritesideposted 14 years ago

    my dad used to tell me "be a ram, not a lamb".  he got that from his father.  the same grandfather had another one i always liked though..."if you can't soar with the eagles in the morning, then you shouldn't have been out hooting with the owls all night".

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       Joelle Burnetteposted 14 years agoin reply to this

       good advice.

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    GoldiStringposted 14 years ago

    My teenage years my dad used to say - "Keep off the grass" - i thought this was some sign posted in a park/garden. Until i saw some teenage groups having a pot session, puffing weed. Aye! that's the grass he was talking about!

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    Dominionmaster2posted 14 years ago

    My dad used to tell us boys that we would rather rake a tiger in the ass with a handful of barbed wire than to mess with him.
    
    He was always going to spin us like a button on a barn door.
    
    Stupid is as stupid does!
    
    My mom used to tell us that it was better to remain silent and let others believe we were stupid, than to open our mouths and remove all doubt.

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       broussardleslieposted 14 years agoin reply to this

       That's AWESOME!

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          maven101posted 14 years agoin reply to this

          My Dad told me when I went into business for myself " What you allow is what you teach "....no wonder he was so tough on us growing up...but he was consistent..

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          Dominionmaster2posted 14 years agoin reply to this

          Yeah my mom was always saying stuff that at first sounds like an insult, but then after a few minutes you thought wow she's kinda right. I always said my Moms Epitaph was going to read, " OH YEAH AND ANOTHER THING MISTER!"

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    LondonGirlposted 14 years ago

    "Worse things happen at sea".
    
    And he tends to say in late June, every year, "darker every day now until Christmas!" which annoys everyone else. Because in the UK, the summer days are endless - light at 4am, dark at 10pm, but the down side is that it's jolly dark in December (-:

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    Deborah-Lynnposted 14 years ago

    "Learn from your elders, if you can avoid making the same mistakes they did you'll be ahead of the game, gorsh almighty!"

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    lrohnerposted 14 years ago

    "Hindsight is 20/20"

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    Sybil Marieposted 14 years ago

    When driving in the car my dad would say "As the monkey said as he backed into the meat grinder...it won't be long now"

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    Nelle Hoxieposted 14 years ago

    Everyday, starting in kindergarten when my sister and I would leave for school my dad would say, "Hold your head up high, put one foot in front of the other, take a deep breath, and speak your peace."
    
    
    Even when we became adults, he would say that as we left the house.

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    LondonGirlposted 14 years ago

    My Granny's one was, "Laugh and the world laughes with you, cry and you cry alone".
    
    Nelle, I love your Dad's!

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    Quilligrapherposted 14 years ago

    My mother never tired of reminding me, "Be sure to get a good education.  It's one of the few things in life that no one can take away from you."
    Q.

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       Joelle Burnetteposted 14 years agoin reply to this

       Are you Jewish? I've been hearing that all my life. My parents made it clear that our ancestors may have been chased out of one place after the next. Therefore, the only thing you can really carry with you no matter where you go is, your mind, your knowledge, your education.

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    A Texanposted 14 years ago

    My dads favorite
    
    I wont F#@K you if you don't F%$K me but if you F$#K me you're F$#Ked!
    
    He has a way with words!

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       Joelle Burnetteposted 14 years agoin reply to this

       Your dad is subtle, isn't he

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    Carmen Borthwickposted 14 years ago

    My dad always told me you can accomplish anything you set your mind to and if you ever feel intimidated by anothe person just picture that person on the toilet because we all look the same when we're taking care of business. Needless to say I am not easily intimidated.

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       Joelle Burnetteposted 14 years agoin reply to this

       Carmen, my dad said the same thing, but he would say to picture them in their undergarments before reminding me, "everyone puts on their pants, one leg at a time."

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