Why do women gain weight after marriage and what to do about it?

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  1. oxymoron profile image57
    oxymoronposted 14 years ago

    Why do women gain weight after marriage? How to deal with it?

    1. Michellcat profile image61
      Michellcatposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      When women are single, they eat food as needed, and can follow whatever diet they please.

      But once they're married, a lot of the time they start cooking for him. And he doesn't want to follow the latest weight loss diet out of Self magazine. Usually men are used to eating an entire box of pop tarts in a sitting, as a snack. They eat HUGE amounts of food, and it's hard to remember not to eat as much as your husband does. His caloric needs are greater, but it's hard to watch him chowing down, and not join in.

      Plus a lot of husbands ridicule wives for dieting or exercising, and it's a very rare husband who'll go for a walk or to the gym with his wife, even if he's eager for her to lose weight.

      1. uliveulearn profile image68
        uliveulearnposted 14 years agoin reply to this

        Well said Michellcat, and I might add that a woman's metabolism is lower than a mans.  Also men usually have a more physical job allowing them to work off the calories daily where as a woman's job is usually sedentary requiring them to find the time to exercise outside of work hours along with maintaining a family and home.  Many woman also forget that as we age the portion size must be reduced.  It sucks, but we just can't eat like a man and it's so hard not to join in with that evening snack.  OK, now I'm hungry.

      2. Sue Adams profile image91
        Sue Adamsposted 14 years agoin reply to this

        That's right, blame it on him!  big_smile

      3. profile image52
        Ray tells the truposted 8 years agoin reply to this

        Wow, just like a woman to show a complete lack of accountability. I guess even as an adult you are not responsible for your own actions. Mind you he was YOUR choice for a partner.

    2. Michellcat profile image61
      Michellcatposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      Oh, also we eat when we're bored, depressed, angry, or lonely. In a marriage, dating is over, and our partner is no longer trying to impress us, and so most women feel lonely, angry, depressed, or bored much of the time.

      1. Sue Adams profile image91
        Sue Adamsposted 14 years agoin reply to this

        You don't have to lose your life when you are married. Get a grip. smile woman

    3. rebekahELLE profile image84
      rebekahELLEposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      some do, certainly not all women gain weight after marriage.
      I think if a woman is already health conscious before marriage, she has better chances to keep her weight in balance. there are plenty of excuses, but a woman does not have to gain weight after marriage or having children.

      if a woman wants to keep the weight off, she can.

      1. Sue Adams profile image91
        Sue Adamsposted 14 years agoin reply to this

        xactly.

    4. stranded07 profile image58
      stranded07posted 14 years agoin reply to this

      i guess weight just goes up with age. and its just coincidence that most women marry just in time that their body shows the weight changes. Plus the fact that having someone to eat a meal with increases our appetite.

    5. Brandon E Newman profile image66
      Brandon E Newmanposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      One of my ex-wife's gripes that lead to divorce, was the fact that she had gained weight. She blamed me for cooking things that she enjoys eating, all the time. How could she start dating again, with those 30 pounds that I put on her. I never called her fat, in fact, I found her even more desirable. She was blaming everything on me. Since the divorce, she's lost the weight. Do I make women fat on purpose? I like to feed the ones that I love. smile

    6. profile image51
      sannyJosephposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      After baby birth, most of the times women stops romantic relationship with their husband.As of this hormones in her body keeps on accumulating in her body as a thick fatty fats. It leads to increase in body weight. Instead they should enjoy their personal romantic relationship frequently and enjoy the every moment. As nature has made them to stay together for one of this this reason. This can very as per the working nature of every individual.

  2. Black Lilly profile image60
    Black Lillyposted 14 years ago

    Reason #1 - having children. Here I guess the only cure is not to have them - you choose what's more important.

    If not children, then it's a question of attitude. You already have a life partner, yes? Why bother about making an impression and looking to the max, if you're "off the market"?
    Gaining weight when single equals to catastrophe for most women, at least most of the times. When you're in some sort of long term relationship, a few pounds is not that important, is it?

    1. Sue Adams profile image91
      Sue Adamsposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      I don't believe I'm hearing this. Do you sincerely mean to say that women keep their figures, like livestock, for "the market"? Surely the main reason for staying fit and healthy is for your own sense of worth and for your own happiness. So many women believe that once they are married they have reached the final  goal in their lives and there is nothing more to achieve. So they let themselves go expecting their hubbies to make them happy. No one can make you happy but yourself.

      1. Black Lilly profile image60
        Black Lillyposted 14 years agoin reply to this

        I think you choose what to believe. Unfortunately, that doesn't change the way things really are.
        And yes, I honestly believe that being "on the market" makes many women pay much more attention to their looks. Again, this isn't some universal truth that would apply to everyone without exceptions.
        Also I do not quite see the connection between weight and happiness here.

      2. Brandon E Newman profile image66
        Brandon E Newmanposted 14 years agoin reply to this

        Exactly. A woman's great figure, is a selling point. After marriage, marketing ones sexual attractiveness, just isn't important anymore. smile

  3. tobey100 profile image60
    tobey100posted 14 years ago

    My wife kept gaining weight seemingly every year.  Oh, wait a minute.  Those were our five kids.  Sorry, I have no significant comment.  I'll just go out the way I came in.

    1. Sue Adams profile image91
      Sue Adamsposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      I have three kids and haven't gained an ounce over my pre-mum days. Women having to gain weight after child bearing is a total myth.

      1. Uninvited Writer profile image77
        Uninvited Writerposted 14 years agoin reply to this

        Well you might just be lucky, it all depends on your own body.

      2. rebekahELLE profile image84
        rebekahELLEposted 14 years agoin reply to this

        bodies are different, metabolisms, but I do agree. it doesn't have to happen to the degree that it does. after both of my sons were born, I quickly was back to my normal weight and have stayed very active. also I hardly ever eat meat now, only chicken or at times pork. the mediterranean diet, and I don't mean diet, I mean way of eating, is very healthy. sue, you are from spain?

        max.... please... men don't gain weight?? where do you live? of course men gain weight. roll

  4. Greg Cremia profile image60
    Greg Cremiaposted 14 years ago

    I thought it had something to do with the wedding cake.

  5. habee profile image93
    habeeposted 14 years ago

    The same reason men do?

  6. caravalhophoto profile image60
    caravalhophotoposted 14 years ago

    Well, I must say that I have finally lost the weight from my 1st pregnancy...it took 28 years...how did I lose it...got a divorce!

    1. tobey100 profile image60
      tobey100posted 14 years agoin reply to this

      lol lol lol  How to lose 180 pounds of ugly fat.......get a divorce!

  7. theirishobserver. profile image60
    theirishobserver.posted 14 years ago

    Folks, there is just something about marrage that says let yourself go, you now have your partner for 'life' and you just dont need to try anymore, good diet and exercise is the way to maintain your pre marrage status, or divorce...thats good:)

  8. mimran profile image55
    mimranposted 14 years ago

    Woman can increase weight due to pregnancy after marriage.

    1. Sue Adams profile image91
      Sue Adamsposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      That's bollocks

      1. profile image0
        EmpressFelicityposted 14 years agoin reply to this

        Can I make a suggestion?  If you hit the "quote" rather than the "reply" button when you respond to a post, then we'll all know who you're saying "bollocks" to lol lol

        1. profile image0
          EmpressFelicityposted 14 years agoin reply to this

          That is, those of us who use the chronological setting of the forums in preference to the threaded one will know whom you're saying it to...

          1. Sue Adams profile image91
            Sue Adamsposted 14 years agoin reply to this

            reply to
            EmpressFelicityposted 13 hours ago

            Can I make a suggestion?  If you hit the "quote" rather than the "reply" button when you respond to a post, then we'll all know who you're saying "bollocks" to lol.

            The whole point of the threaded view is that you don't need to quote. Come on, get used to it, it's much easier.

            PS "bollocks was to:

            mimranposted 3 days ago

            Woman can increase weight due to pregnancy after marriage.
            I jus meant, they can if they want to bute they don't have to.

            1. profile image0
              EmpressFelicityposted 14 years agoin reply to this

              I tried it and gave up on it, because it did my head in.

      2. Black Lilly profile image60
        Black Lillyposted 14 years agoin reply to this

        To YOU.
        Unfortunately, not everyone is so lucky.

  9. theirishobserver. profile image60
    theirishobserver.posted 14 years ago

    mimran, too diplomatic there smile

  10. profile image0
    Maximus591posted 14 years ago

    Females have higher body fat than men. Prior to marriage they expend their energies on trying to look slim and sexy in order to ensnare a man. Once they have their man they no longer feel motivated to maintain themselves as desirable, so they let themselves go. It's an appalling crime they commit.

    It should be written into the marriage constitution : Once the female gets fat after marriage the man can legally divorce her without having to give up half the house.

    1. Ivorwen profile image65
      Ivorwenposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      And what if the male gains weight?  I have seen many men let themselves go completely, putting on 50+ pounds after marriage.  This is not just a female problem.

      1. profile image0
        Maximus591posted 14 years agoin reply to this

        It is ENTIRELY a female problem. Females are getter FATTER, whereas men are maintaining their weight baseline.

        This is an appalling state of afairs.

        Don't fat females know men don't want them?

        We are rapidly approaching an evolutionary crises. With the mating population of desirable females rapidly diminshing it will mean men will have to mate with undesirable fatties. Mating with unhealthy, overweight, sexually undesirable females has significant consequences for human evolution.

        Poor Charles Darwin, he would be turning in his grave.

        1. profile image0
          EmpressFelicityposted 14 years agoin reply to this

          Err... are you sure?
          http://imway2fat.files.wordpress.com/2009/03/fat-man.jpg
          lol lol

          1. profile image0
            Maximus591posted 14 years agoin reply to this

            Yes, that is a fat man. He has no shirt on. He's also stuffing his face.

            Now, transpose a picture of a fat woman onto the fat man, who also has no top (and bra) stuffing her face.

            Who would you be more repulsed by?

            For me, the fat man is cuddly.

            Whereas the fat female needs to be locked away.

            1. Sue Adams profile image91
              Sue Adamsposted 14 years agoin reply to this

              I wouldn't cuddle him if they paid me a milion euros

          2. Misha profile image64
            Mishaposted 14 years agoin reply to this

            He-he, that's a good one, looks pretty much like me lol

            1. earnestshub profile image73
              earnestshubposted 14 years agoin reply to this

              You lost some weight Misha! lol

              1. Misha profile image64
                Mishaposted 14 years agoin reply to this

                Yeah, people tell me this. tongue

          3. Stimp profile image59
            Stimpposted 14 years agoin reply to this

            lol lol lol  The caption should read:  "Happy 2nd Anniversary MAXImus591, I love you so much....your loving wife."

            1. Stimp profile image59
              Stimpposted 14 years agoin reply to this
        2. Stimp profile image59
          Stimpposted 14 years agoin reply to this

          I'm sorry SUGAR....you are very very wrong.  I'm smokin hot at 42 and in the best shape of my life.  And I AM married. In addition, there are alot of female hubbers out there that follow my path as well.  So, if YOU, personally are choosing those females who are superficial enough (thus, more than likely less educated than the normal female) to maintain their weight for the sole purpose of dating YOU....then, it's your issue, not theirs nor ours.  And, no, my love, men are not getting more fit while we are slipping into some sort of fat infested hell.  sorry....on the contrary.  "Bitter Table of one....Bitter? table of one..."  I'm guessing you hear that one alot LOL

          1. profile image0
            Maximus591posted 14 years agoin reply to this

            For someone who claims to be 'smokin hot at 42' (An oxymoron, surely?) then where is the proof?

            Hiding this 'smokin hot bod' of yours behind an avatar of a four legged canine would suggest to me you're not as 'smokin hot' as you like to believe... 'Tepid' is the word that comes to mind.

        3. Daniel Carter profile image62
          Daniel Carterposted 14 years agoin reply to this

          Hopefully this is a tongue-in-cheek post. Either that, or there is some serious denial about what you see on the streets.

          People gain weight for a variety of reasons, OBVIOUSLY. Even because of imbalances in their systems, which are legit. For example, hypo-thyroid comes to mind. However, addressing those issues is still a responsibility to maintain health. Poor diet is obviously a big factor, usually because they don't want to have to think about what they are eating. Hormones constantly change as we age. Giving birth is a huge factor. The chemical changes that happen in the body can take a while to rebalance after birth.

          And for the record, I don't see any more overweight women than I do men. I don't know what the statistics are, officially, but to assume that only women get fat is shear stupidity and denial of facts, to me.

          One of the biggest problems, of course, is that those who make judgment statements about those with less than perfect physiques obviously suffer from FAT HEADS. That's something that is obvious to everyone else, but not usually obvious to the person suffering from it.

          1. myownworld profile image72
            myownworldposted 14 years agoin reply to this

            big_smile Hey, Daniel...how do you do this each time? There must be a name for it.
            ah yes...forum brilliance!!!

            1. Daniel Carter profile image62
              Daniel Carterposted 14 years agoin reply to this

              It's called being SASSY and MOUTHY.
              Which I don't like to do to people I really enjoy.
              smile

              Thanks, love, for the nice compliment. You're the best!

      2. Uninvited Writer profile image77
        Uninvited Writerposted 14 years agoin reply to this

        Please ignore him, he is nothing but a troll

        1. profile image0
          shazwellynposted 14 years agoin reply to this

          Is he a friend of yours?  lol x

    2. Sue Adams profile image91
      Sue Adamsposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      I agree but then men should sign a clause not to fart in bed and not to snore and not to grow a beer belly. Oh, and not to go bald either. Or else, divorce. big_smile

      1. profile image0
        Maximus591posted 14 years agoin reply to this

        Tell me, why do men maintain their attractiveness much longer than females?

        A fat female past the age of 33 or 34 is pretty much finished. They should be just catapaulted into outer space where they can bounce off satellites or something.

        A man, still looks remarkably refined well into his 50's even if he's bald and fat. The same cannot be said of a female even in her 40's let alone her 50's.

        Truly, is this a genetic conspiracy? Do genes favour the aging process in men more so than the aging process in females?

        1. Valerie F profile image60
          Valerie Fposted 14 years agoin reply to this

          It's not a conspiracy. It's because  women are much more tolerant of men who don't look perfect than the other way around- and good for the species that we are, too!

          Maybe the reason why you have such trouble finding desirable women is because they all find your attitude repulsive.

          1. Daniel Carter profile image62
            Daniel Carterposted 14 years agoin reply to this

            lol  lol  lol

          2. Flightkeeper profile image66
            Flightkeeperposted 14 years agoin reply to this

            No doubt Valerie, those women who find Max undesirable suddenly look kind of pudgy to Maxie.

  11. tobey100 profile image60
    tobey100posted 14 years ago

    Seriously, I don't care what my wife weighs.  Married 34 years not because of her weight, her soul is light as a feather and wrapped around my heart like a blanket.  To me she'll always be 19 years old and 105 pounds.

    1. Hope Wilbanks profile image68
      Hope Wilbanksposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      You're a keeper, tobey100. wink

      I agree with much of what I've read here. I've struggled with weight for the last 6 years (after giving birth to our second child). I never really had any problems keeping it off after I had our first child. But in between the two, I had a miscarriage, wreck that totaled my car, husband lost his job, etc. etc. LOTS of stress = LOTS of emotional eating.

      For me, it's really a mind thing. I know I can lose the weight, I just can't seem to keep it off, b/c once it's off, I tend to be less strict and eventually go back to bad habits and emotional eating binges.

      1. tobey100 profile image60
        tobey100posted 14 years agoin reply to this

        You've probably just described the most difficult fight any human can engage in.  Best of luck.  You sound like if you made your mind up you'd be quite formidable!

    2. Ivorwen profile image65
      Ivorwenposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      Here is a man who knows what marriage is about!

      1. profile image0
        shazwellynposted 14 years agoin reply to this

        oh tobey... you are lovely x

    3. AnythingArtzy profile image68
      AnythingArtzyposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      I think I'm in love smile smile
      what a lucky ladyyour wife is, and what a gentleman you are tobey

    4. IzzyM profile image82
      IzzyMposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      That is the sweetest quote I have ever heard!

    5. charanjeet kaur profile image61
      charanjeet kaurposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      Aww tobey this is beautiful, only if my hubby read this I wouldnt have to slog in the gym and spend a fortune. lol...

      1. profile image0
        Maximus591posted 14 years agoin reply to this

        Instead of slogging yourself stupid in the gym in pursuit of a hot bod, did you ever consider eating less?

        What a novel concept that is.

        You eat less, you stay slim.

        You eat more, you get fat.

  12. Will Apse profile image92
    Will Apseposted 14 years ago

    Am I only person who ever married a woman who didn't end up like a whale?

    1. Ivorwen profile image65
      Ivorwenposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      No, you are not.  Many women maintain their shape.  I am the same size I was at my wedding.  My mom is about the same.  Her mother never gained weight.  I have friends from college who have not gained weight, and there many women in the community were I live that are plenty slim.

      1. myownworld profile image72
        myownworldposted 14 years agoin reply to this

        exactly, it's such a generalization really.....I too know plenty of women who are conscious of their appearance and work hard to stay in shape irrespective of their marital status. I mean, I can understand why marriage and child bearing can affect that, but then it doesn't many others! smile

  13. myownworld profile image72
    myownworldposted 14 years ago

    Motivation and time are two very necessary things for one to stay in shape:
    Children.....shift in responsibilities... focus on 'home' rather than 'self'...late night dinners with family...life style changes...etc. basically all can contribute to weight gain.

    (Having said that, I'm both married and a mother, and I weigh 114 at 5 5'', but i work hard at the gym and watch what I eat, so no not every woman gains weight after she's married!)

  14. caravalhophoto profile image60
    caravalhophotoposted 14 years ago

    Well, I was never 180lbs over weight...thank goodness.  However, I was 128lbs when married...168 when gave birth, stress, Cancer and just taking care of a growing family, I couldn't lose the weight...divorced and in a much different place than I was...eating better, exercising and just enjoying life in general...I am back down to 125lbs 5'5 and feeling great.  My husband never said anything about the extra poundage...so not sure if it bothered him...but it bothered me, glad I was able to lose it and am very healthy today.

  15. profile image0
    Poppa Bluesposted 14 years ago

    Why men don`t? Hell I was 119 pounds when I graduated high school, 135 when I got out of the service and 160 after 10 years of marriage. I just think we all put on weight with age. Your pace slows after you`re married and there is a tendency to consume more calories.

  16. Davinagirl3 profile image60
    Davinagirl3posted 14 years ago

    This is an easy one.  My husband loves to eat and he loves for me to eat like he does.  I am not blaming him.  He doesn't force-feed me, but he makes it really hard to stick to a diet.

  17. Uninvited Writer profile image77
    Uninvited Writerposted 14 years ago

    And sometimes it's just a natural part of aging...

  18. Uninvited Writer profile image77
    Uninvited Writerposted 14 years ago

    Ignore him...

  19. salt profile image59
    saltposted 14 years ago

    Sometimes its not having children, but the added male energy of a larger male energy around, that women have often taken on their partners cares and worries and weight.

    Have you ever seen a happy man with a larger woman. Is he her partner or a man wanting a mother?

    Women who are overweight, may also be unhappy in marriage. The fairytale belief that marriage will be wonderful is not quite the same Saturday afternoon when sport has been on the tv for 5 nights of the week already and its now on alllllllll weekend.

    Also, you can see not just from weight if a woman is in an abusive relationship and taking on energy dumped on her by others, whether it is their partner or others. I have learnt, when you see women in their mid years with a face that looks dropping or other, that they may indeed have an agressive dinner partner. These signs are easy to read once you understand.

  20. salt profile image59
    saltposted 14 years ago

    oh and maybe they just went on a diet to fit in the wedding dress.

    maybe the man they married didnt live up to their expectations, so the chocolate icecream becomes a gourmet delight.

    umm just 2 ideas..

  21. wychic profile image86
    wychicposted 14 years ago

    All I can say is the only reason my first husband didn't gain the kind of weight I did after we got married was because he already weighed nearly 400 pounds and ate enough for five people. My problem was falling into the trap of eating food I didn't want because that's what he wanted, and giving in and eating more than I wanted because he insisted that I wasn't eating enough.

    To me, there is very little attractive about a fat man...or an overly fat woman...because barring serious medical issues it only shows a lack of self-respect. Yes, some people have acceptable reasons and I think a large portion of women who think they're fat are mistaken. That said...in a given relationship, both people will gain weight, but since men have a higher muscle mass and, generally, a higher mass altogether, he may not gain as quickly and won't show it as clearly.

    Personally, I think one of the biggest problems people have is in finding lifestyle matches. With my current husband I've lost a huge amount of weight (almost pre-baby size!) and so has he. I think one of the advantages is that we were both very athletic people most of our lives, so getting him to take a walk with me is quite easy. Also, he is quite a bit older than me and realized 60 pounds ago that something had to change, so he eats about the same amount I do despite being 9" taller. He recognizes that I am extremely sensitive to grease and removes every bit of it he can from the food, and pretty much every dish he makes is very healthy. We don't eat a lot of meat, and then almost never beef...turkey, chicken, and bison are our staples.

    In addition, he actually pays attention...if he sees a muscle that is particularly well-toned he'll let me know, and is constantly going out of his way to watch me go upstairs and what-not and then commenting on the view. Why is this important? It gives incentive to work toward more compliments big_smile. Not to mention, I think most women here will agree that if you feel sexy around your husband, you're more likely to hit the gym or the workout tapes than snack in your spare time because you feel better and have a very definite motivation.

    Women do also tend to be the more emotionally-connected partner (not all the time, but it does seem to be the rule more than the exception) and so she is more likely to get stressed out and retain weight if the emotional connection is not achieved or in times of crisis.

    Everyone's motivation is different, but a good lifestyle match -- I think -- will encourage people to be healthier rather than gain weight after marriage.

  22. profile image0
    Justine76posted 14 years ago

    I gained weight on purpose to piss max off...

    1. myownworld profile image72
      myownworldposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      lol

      1. profile image0
        Justine76posted 14 years agoin reply to this

        hey...how are ya?

        1. myownworld profile image72
          myownworldposted 14 years agoin reply to this

          forum addicted! which means, great! big_smile
          btw. you sticking with that avatar?

          1. profile image0
            Justine76posted 14 years agoin reply to this

            oh no..im a sick weak overwieght old coward..gonna change it soon..  lol
            really tho, I have to change if for reasons that I think you undersatnd...

            1. myownworld profile image72
              myownworldposted 14 years agoin reply to this

              lol I know...same reason I do not bare more than a shoulder here...! wink

              (((keep it for a while to spite max though!!!!)))

              1. profile image0
                Justine76posted 14 years agoin reply to this

                brb.....

  23. rebekahELLE profile image84
    rebekahELLEposted 14 years ago

    maximus, everyone doesn't have to show their beautiful self on a forum... for many reasons!

    sometimes I really like your answers, but this thing you have towards fat women is just plain mean, and no, I am not fat and have never been overweight, but it's a fact of life, many people are overweight, men and women.

    obviously, you've never been to florida. many women and men here have 'smokin hot' bodies because we like to be active outdoors and enjoy showing up at the beach looking half way decent. areas where people spend more time indoors tend to have more weight on them for a few reasons.

    1. profile image0
      Justine76posted 14 years agoin reply to this

      they are doing it on purpose, to make max mad. wink  whats he even doing here these days? struck out to many times on his on line dating services?

    2. profile image0
      Maximus591posted 14 years agoin reply to this

      Oh, it gets worse.

      We now have FOUR asthetically displeasing females in a row all hiding behind an avatar. Quite shameful.

      What do you have to hide?

      At least you could do the decent thing that most middle aged females do with puffy, wrinkled cheeks : post a pic taken 20 years ago and pass it off as current. But no, you hide behind an avatar!

      Men don't behave in this manner.

      So, what gives females the licence to lurk unseen? Ashamed by their lack of attractiveness?

      1. Flightkeeper profile image66
        Flightkeeperposted 14 years agoin reply to this

        Shhhhhh Maxie, there, there. (pats him on top of head)

      2. Valerie F profile image60
        Valerie Fposted 14 years agoin reply to this

        Maxie, better be careful. I'm 35, married, using a picture that's less than a year old for my avatar, I exceed army fitness standards, and I can pick you up and firefighter carry you back to the He-Man Woman-Haters' Club Headquarters where you belong- assuming of course that you're no more than 200 lbs.

        1. profile image0
          Maximus591posted 14 years agoin reply to this

          I sport a perfectly honed torso, thoroughly deviod of even one microgram of fat.

          When it comes to masculine perfection, I am unequalled.

          However, my perfection aside, I do applaud you for posting a real pic. Did this experience, the posting of a picture, cause you any unecessary emotional suffering? Did you require psycho-therapy? You clearly seem to have survived unscathed from the experience. Bravo!

          Pity the other visually unappealing females cannot follow your fine example.

          1. Daniel Carter profile image62
            Daniel Carterposted 14 years agoin reply to this

            Well, at least you do have a vicious sense of humor, whether appreciated or not. Mostly not....
            wink

          2. Valerie F profile image60
            Valerie Fposted 14 years agoin reply to this

            Perfection??!!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

            I'm visually appealing enough, but you're so mentally and emotionally unappealing, nobody would give a rat's rear even if your torso was perfectly sculpted.

            No healthy, mentally balanced person cares how good you look if you behave in a disgusting manner.

          3. Vicky_P profile image54
            Vicky_Pposted 14 years agoin reply to this

            You sound dead horny.  Fancy going out with me some time?

            It's my real picture I'm using as an avatar.  Promise!

          4. wychic profile image86
            wychicposted 14 years agoin reply to this

            No fat at all? Sounds particularly un-cuddly to me, I can find a 2x4 at Home Depot tongue

      3. profile image0
        Iðunnposted 14 years agoin reply to this

        Wow, max.  What does anyone's appearance have to do with being a good writer?  This is primarily a writing site, not a modeling agency.

        I don't see a problem with people using various avatars and I also don't see why any woman, here or otherwise, should be worried about being attractive much past suiting herself and her own partner.  Is it necessary for every woman in the world to be sexually appealing to every other human being?  Does this rule apply to men too?

        I think appearance is largely irrelevant on a site like this and in real life, I think health and fitness is the goal physically.  Of course the part that really counts is how well you treat yourself (including keeping yourself physically fit) and how well you treat others in real life.  If you're doing it right, you have a close family and lots of real life friends and friendly acquaintances to show for it.

  24. Flightkeeper profile image66
    Flightkeeperposted 14 years ago

    Max having a fat head?! Say it isn't so. big_smile

    1. myownworld profile image72
      myownworldposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      lol

    2. profile image0
      Justine76posted 14 years agoin reply to this

      HAHAHAHAHHAAAA!!!!!

  25. profile image0
    Justine76posted 14 years ago

    Im hiding behind a sexy MAN, cuz its clearly only women who get gross...
    hows it going max? do you love me yet?

    1. profile image0
      Maximus591posted 14 years agoin reply to this

      Just post a real pic.

      A real pic that is current.

      A real pic that displays your highly desirable slender, non-wrinkled form for all to see.

      How difficult is that?

      I mean, we are not talking advanced quantum physics here. It's a pic you know.

      The more you hide behind an avatar then the reasons you give for hiding behind the avatar grow ever more facile.

      Reveal your glorious, lithe, magnificent self to us all.

      ..... I will go get my sick bucket.

  26. Daniel Carter profile image62
    Daniel Carterposted 14 years ago

    Max: "Men don't behave in this manner."

    Rilly.
    Are you for sure toadally shitting me?

    Wow. Yer a toadal Einstein, dude.

  27. Flightkeeper profile image66
    Flightkeeperposted 14 years ago

    Justine, to piss Max off, not only did you get fat, you changed sex! lol lol

  28. Daniel Carter profile image62
    Daniel Carterposted 14 years ago

    Max, look in the mirror, it might possibly be that you're WEARING your sick bucket.

  29. rebekahELLE profile image84
    rebekahELLEposted 14 years ago

    max, max, max, you're not even real...

    I am not hiding, nor am I aesthetically displeasing, or whatever you said, nor do I have puffy middle aged cheeks~~~~~ I don't have to post a pic of how I looked 20 years ago, because I look better!

    my privacy is what I value online and it will stay that way.
    my pics online are for my friends only. so there tongue

    1. wychic profile image86
      wychicposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      Same here, I was much chubbier 20 years ago...as every 3-year-old should be wink

  30. profile image0
    Crazdwriterposted 14 years ago

    I gained weight after marriage mostly because of taking my birth control pills smile and lack of energy because unemployed. I was in great shape when going to school and working but since I am no longer doing either, my energy level is down and I don't really feel like doing anything sad

  31. prettydarkhorse profile image63
    prettydarkhorseposted 14 years ago

    I didnt gained weight after having children, been skinny until now, maybe its in the genes, need to gain a little bit, I am only 100 lbs

  32. Uninvited Writer profile image77
    Uninvited Writerposted 14 years ago

    I'm sure Max uses his real picture...yeah, right.

    It's probably closer to this:

    http://i494.photobucket.com/albums/rr303/1oldergoat/pinhead.jpg

    Stop giving him attention, he is a troll and nothing more.

    1. profile image0
      Maximus591posted 14 years agoin reply to this

      I don't mean to be rude (well,  actually I do)... but if one were to superimpose the picture of this rather handsome chap onto your picture, Uninvited, there does appear to a rather unnerving similarity between the two.

      It's often thought we seek comfort in that that most closely resembles us.

      So, what does this say about you?

      Food for thought my little cherub.

  33. Valerie F profile image60
    Valerie Fposted 14 years ago

    The reasons why women gain more weight than men typically after marriage is because our bodies require a higher body fat percentage, our metabolism is lower, we gain weight when we have kids, we gain weight with hormonal changes, we live with people who are oblivious to how challenging it can be to keep our weight down, everyone typically turns to us for everything food-related, and because most people, male or female, tend to gain weight as they get older.

  34. prettydarkhorse profile image63
    prettydarkhorseposted 14 years ago

    oh that is not nice,

  35. MissE profile image75
    MissEposted 14 years ago

    IDK.  I've been the same weight since high school.  I've been married 10 years this July and I have three kids.  Go figure.

  36. Jane@CM profile image60
    Jane@CMposted 14 years ago

    Surprise surprise I still weigh the same as when I got married 22 years ago.  Holding at 114.  I only gained when I was pregnant.

  37. WriteAngled profile image81
    WriteAngledposted 14 years ago

    My main question is why this question is being asked. What about men who get fat, flabby, lazy and lacking in personal hygiene after marriage?

    1. profile image0
      Maximus591posted 14 years agoin reply to this

      The reason this question is asked is because is cuts right back to our genetic and evolutionary expectations of the sexes.

      Men desire slim, sexy vessels for impregnation. The slim and youthful female form is by far the most genetically healthy to raise a baby. Flabby, heffalumps just don't cut it.

      In the days of prehistoric man, what use was a fat female? With her big, bouncy belly she would stand no chance of outrunning Mr T-Rex the dinosaur. He would gobble up her chubby body in one gulp. Well, maybe two gulps if she was especially fat.   hehe.

      So, as you can see... with females ballooning out of all proportions, it's both genetically and evolutionary dangerous. Not because Mr T-Rex will eat them (He's not around these days you know) but because they are not providing the most genetically robust of environments for the raising of a child.

      1. profile image0
        Kathryn LJposted 14 years agoin reply to this

        Hmm, if this is true, why do so many early representations of the female form depict a very large woman with enormous breasts and backsides?  Experts have identified these as fertility objects.  May be bean pole physics are a modern social construction?  After all, not that long ago, a thin woman was a dying woman.

        1. profile image0
          Kathryn LJposted 14 years agoin reply to this

          Cat got your tongue?  Or is a fat woman sitting on you for coming out with such stuff?  Flabby heffalumps indeed.

        2. profile image0
          Maximus591posted 14 years agoin reply to this

          Ahhh yes, it could be a modern day social construct : that being slim is better. And yes, it might be possible for men to recondition their mindsets through excessive exposure to the 'fat woman' to find them more acceptable and desirable. But this would take time. It would require a media revolution. That is something that isn't going to happen anytime soon.

          Right now, as it stands, fat women are everywhere. I don't like them. I don't even like medium build females. They truly make me gag. Am I alone in my view? Am i sh@t. Men throughout the western world and sizeable chunks of asia don't like flabbies.

          So, what are you girls gonna do about it?

          1. profile image0
            Kathryn LJposted 14 years agoin reply to this

            Sod all mate, like you say, its only the  young nubile ones that are barely mensturating that interst guys.  And like you say, fat women are every where.  Like your cheek!

          2. Vicky_P profile image54
            Vicky_Pposted 14 years agoin reply to this

            Methinks you do protest a bit too much Maximus my lovely.

            1. blondepoet profile image68
              blondepoetposted 14 years agoin reply to this

              oooooo I don't like men who talk a heap of shit. Ooooo they truly make me gag.
              As an advocate for the prevention of anorexia and for all women kind that they are beautiful no matter the size or shape, I will take you on any day mate, don't insult my fellow woman.

              1. Vicky_P profile image54
                Vicky_Pposted 14 years agoin reply to this

                I reckon our Maximus fancies fat women really...  come on mate, why don't you admit it and put yourself out of your misery?

                1. blondepoet profile image68
                  blondepoetposted 14 years agoin reply to this

                  Thank God he is the 0.0000000007% of men who think like this. To tell you the truth I think he is a frustrated 270kg man lol.

                  1. Vicky_P profile image54
                    Vicky_Pposted 14 years agoin reply to this

                    That's frustrated as in "needing to be winched out through one of his windows in order to have his appendix out"?  lol lol

                2. profile image0
                  Kathryn LJposted 14 years agoin reply to this

                  Yeah, he does kind of go on about them doesn't he?  I think our Vicky's got a point Maxy.

  38. profile image0
    sneakorocksolidposted 14 years ago

    It's a trick they play on us innocent men. The best way I've found for them to lose it is chase around the neighborhood with the car, works everytime!big_smile

  39. AllanWrites profile image61
    AllanWritesposted 14 years ago

    Just because men also get fat, does not mean that women do not have this problem. Both have problems. Your statement does not negate either side's issues.

    1. rebekahELLE profile image84
      rebekahELLEposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      I don't think she was trying to negate the issue, just that it also happens to men.  and then sometimes those same men get irritated that their partner is overweight... hmm  or complain about overweight females.

  40. rebekahELLE profile image84
    rebekahELLEposted 14 years ago

    max, what about previous ages when women were not slim, but plump, like Renaissance, Enlightenment Ages?

    now slim is not slim, it's skinny, too unhealthy.

  41. profile image0
    sneakorocksolidposted 14 years ago

    They put on some weight to help deliver a stronger blow when you don't listen, ow!big_smile

    1. profile image0
      Kathryn LJposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      I love you guys, you really crack me up!

    2. Paradise7 profile image69
      Paradise7posted 14 years agoin reply to this

      Good one, sneak!

      1. profile image0
        sneakorocksolidposted 14 years agoin reply to this

        Thanks friend!big_smile

  42. WriteAngled profile image81
    WriteAngledposted 14 years ago

    Actually, Maximus591, your anorectic slim model is probably not menstruating and thus unable to bear a child.

    And flabby men, like you seem to be from your avatar, would not outrun T rex or similar either, so they would not live long enough to pass on their genes, thank Goddess.

    1. profile image0
      Maximus591posted 14 years agoin reply to this

      See, this is what kills me.

      The fat females perspective on a slim female is grossly distorted. In the mind of a fat female, the slim female is never slim, she is never slender, she is never perfect. There has to be something wrong with her. Ahh.. she's annorexic! By denouncing a perfectly formed slender female as annorexic, it helps all those unwieldly, unsightly, overweight, gargauntuan females feel so much better about themselves.  This has to stop!

      1. WriteAngled profile image81
        WriteAngledposted 14 years agoin reply to this

        I am not gargantuan. I have a BMI in the normal range. Women with a body weight 15% below the normal range, which is standard for many models, are likely to be amenorrheic and thus infertile until they gain sufficient weight to be in the normal range.

        1. profile image0
          Maximus591posted 14 years agoin reply to this

          Drivel.

          Your picture would imply you are not a female of slender dimensions. That's Ok. The world needs the less desirable as a springboard for the elevation of the more desirable. 

          The vast majority of slender females are not annorexic nor have any other medical complaint. They are perfect. Is this what the fatties cannot deal with? Because in a slender female they see a perfection they themselves can only dream of?

          1. WriteAngled profile image81
            WriteAngledposted 14 years agoin reply to this

            Depends what you call slender dimensions. I am a couple of sizes below the average dress size for UK women despite being 56, I ran two half marathons three years ago before I had to take a break due to major surgery. If we are to go by facial features alone, I would categorise you as flabby and unfit and if you do, by any chance, produce sperm, I would not wish them to contribute to producing a child with either of my daughters (who are UK size 8 and 10, respectively).

          2. profile image0
            Kathryn LJposted 14 years agoin reply to this

            Now now Maximus, just because you prefer the more androgenous form is not a reason for being mean to writeangled.  We don't think any less of you for being attracted to the boyish figure.

          3. profile image0
            sneakorocksolidposted 14 years agoin reply to this

            You don't like women do you?

      2. blondepoet profile image68
        blondepoetposted 14 years agoin reply to this

        Are you for real? Most men are happy just to have a good women. I do not understand this mentality at all. Come back to Earth.Thank God for real men in this world, who live on the real planet.

        1. profile image0
          Maximus591posted 14 years agoin reply to this

          Am I for real?

          ... thus speaks the peroxide blonde whose avatar image merges a cartoon-like representation of self into an artificial idealisation of self to create.... well, whatever it is you've created.

          I suggest you don't ask if I'm real. It reflects quite unfavourably on you.

          1. blondepoet profile image68
            blondepoetposted 14 years agoin reply to this

            Listen, I am afraid your comments merely make me laugh. Do you honestly think I really care what you think of me?
            Perhaps it would do you well to read my hubs to see my other pictures to see that I am exactly who I am and you are talking like a fool.
            Could you please direct me to your other pictures to verify that you are not what you preach. Are they perhaps in the application pages for "The Biggest Loser".
            Honestly you are making a complete fool of yourself. Perhaps you should be concentrating on a game of Monopoly instead.

            1. Misha profile image64
              Mishaposted 14 years agoin reply to this

              He is still not banned? LOL

              But replying to his comments you make him thinking they matter to you Deb. Turn off the alarm clock, babe wink

            2. profile image0
              Maximus591posted 14 years agoin reply to this

              Of course you care what I think. You have responded haven't you?
              Responding shows you care. If you don't care, you don't respond. Simple, my little peroxide viper.

              You will notice that I don't respond to virtually 95% of comments targetted at me. And, I do seem to attract rather a large volume of comments, which is all very mysterious.

              Perhaps a small amount of peroxide has seeped into your brain causing a meltdown. You have my sympathies.

              1. profile image0
                sneakorocksolidposted 14 years agoin reply to this

                You're not really a ladies man are you? C'mon admit it!

          2. profile image0
            Kathryn LJposted 14 years agoin reply to this

            Quite the naughty boy aren't you?  Your answers are certainly grabbing attention, I don't believe for one minute that you are as shallow as your making out.  So big girls don't float your boat, its nothing to shout about Max.  So you don't like dyed blond hair.  Bit picky really, I gather you are single?

            1. blondepoet profile image68
              blondepoetposted 14 years agoin reply to this

              And sexually frustrated...
              Boy I am out of this one now....No point wrestling with one bad egg with a distorted perception on the world.
              REMEMBER ALL WOMEN YOU ARE TRULY BEAUTIFUL LET NO MAN EVER TELL YOU DIFFERENT.XOXOX

  43. Paradise7 profile image69
    Paradise7posted 14 years ago

    I think women put on weight because they aren't as happy as they thought they'd be.  Women have a lot of romantic dreams that don't come true, from day to day; marriage, like life, takes a lot of compromising.

    I know a lot of women that eat when they're sad or don't get enough sex.  It's a sensual compensation.

  44. blondepoet profile image68
    blondepoetposted 14 years ago

    With women child birth is main reason, but why do men balloon out?There are so many fat men. What is going on?

  45. rebekahELLE profile image84
    rebekahELLEposted 14 years ago

    rude men are not desirable in any size, shape or form.

    1. blondepoet profile image68
      blondepoetposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      amen sister

      1. rebekahELLE profile image84
        rebekahELLEposted 14 years agoin reply to this

        amen amen sister.

  46. yenajeon profile image55
    yenajeonposted 14 years ago

    Hope I don't get huge! sad Please metabolism, stay forever!!

  47. cheaptrick profile image74
    cheaptrickposted 14 years ago

    What Kinda Stupid does a guy have to be to Even Post on a thread like this!
    Oops...I just did huh...
    I'll just leave now ladies...
    You can put down those knives...
    tip toe...
    tip toe...
    tip toe...
    smile

  48. profile image51
    take2daydietposted 14 years ago

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    24 Hours CHAIN FAT BURNING REACTION WITH DOUBLE EFFECTS Product Of Japan Contains (1) Bottle with (60) Capsules. Items of sale: Please make sure you read the auction description and make sure you bid or purchase the right item(s). All sales are final. Winning bidder must make payment within 5 business days. We do not accept return or exchange unless product is defective. By Taking (1) Capsule Before Breakfast For the First Three Days Then (2) Capsules Before Breakfast From Then On, Resulting In.....

  49. ftclick profile image55
    ftclickposted 12 years ago

    the facts are as women age their metabolism slows, their being active slows. They do not have to stay in shape to get a man. Some men do the same thing. However, when there is one person in the relationship who has always worked out and ate properly, the do tend to stay in shape. It has to be a way of life. This does not mean working out P90x style 5 or 6 times a week for an hour and watching everything you eat, Just be active and not eat so much junk or bready stuff. 
    Even as a single person you can gain weight with the super-sized restaurant meals, buy in bulk (so you eat more), and 100s of non-nutritious foods that are prevalent in the American diet. Really, it is not that hard. The diet thrown at us by the media is the main cause. How many different types of chips or oreo cookies do we really need at a supermarket?  Yeah, I saw that in the store b/c my kid likes them. The Americanized Mexican diet is full of carbs too..so much corn, tortillas, cheese, beans, sour cream, etc.. Hardly any vegetables. You're bound to gain. I know it is good and tasty but eat it in moderation and throw some really healthy food in there too.

  50. Alex-Zander profile image59
    Alex-Zanderposted 12 years ago

    We have to ask a question: "When exactly "after marriage" she gained weight?.
    1) Is it few month after they got married?
    2) Is it 4 years after they been married
    3) or is it right after she gave birth.

    All have different cause.
    If she gained weight in scenario 1 and 2, then it is because of life style change and maybe stress. So to reverse the damage - she needs to get back to the schedule. Eat smaller portions, never skip a meal and move, walk, run.

    If she gained weight after pregnancy, then we are talking about postpartum transition and that's where majority of women struggle. The way out of it is to balance hormones.

 
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