Buried one of my best friends today..I'm still in shock.

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  1. donotfear profile image82
    donotfearposted 13 years ago

    I had a friend named Lynda I've known since early 70's. We've been through so much together. We were running buddies in the 70's, party animals, then devoted wives & mothers in the 80's-90's. 

    She had Lupus. Fought it for nearly 30 years. Nothing changed between us, still friends, but our lives went different directions.  We had a good talk in late January. I think she knew the end was near, as she also sent me a long letter.

    I was waiting to get my car serviced today. Opened the paper, and there it was. I broke down, told them to cancel the maintenance & burst into tears. I had 30 minutes to make it to the funeral. I was wearing a tie-dyed shirt, jeans, & sneakers...but I didn't care.  Her family didn't care either.

    They said they had been trying to contact me but did not  have a good phone number. It was a wonderful service.

    So I have gone through very much today, I'm exhausted, drained and feel light headed. It happened so fast. I got to say goodbye to her....

    Here's to my good friend, Lynda "Smokey-Joe"....I love you! WE will always be bonded!

    1. Putz Ballard profile image59
      Putz Ballardposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      God bless you as you grieve for your precious friend. These are always difficult times.

    2. Hokey profile image60
      Hokeyposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      I feel your pain. Love ya Annette!

      1. donotfear profile image82
        donotfearposted 13 years agoin reply to this

        I know you do. We went through so much together....got busted together in 76'.  Went through the birth of our children together. It's difficult.

    3. TheGlassSpider profile image65
      TheGlassSpiderposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      Oh I am so so sorry to hear about your friend. I wish I could give you the hugs that I'm holding for you. I wish there were some words I could offer you that would take away the pain. Know that you are loved, that you are in my thoughts, and that I'm sending positive energy your way.

      Always, always feel free to drop me a line if you want to talk. Please take care.

      1. donotfear profile image82
        donotfearposted 13 years agoin reply to this

        Okay Spidey, I may take you up on that offer for some good old fashioned friend hugs talk. Let us counsel together.!  Lynda would love it! Talk a bout a fighter...dear God in heaven, she had Lupus for 30 years & never gave up, until now. Lost her fingers, toes, a leg.....she still kept fighting. I imagine I'll be writing a tribute to her soon and send to her family.

    4. lorlie6 profile image74
      lorlie6posted 13 years agoin reply to this

      I am also so sorry to hear this, donotfear.  What a terrible shock this day must have been for you.  Thank you for sharing a bit of your friendship with us here.  She has lovely eyes.

    5. willybeach profile image59
      willybeachposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      I have a best friend like you - we've took sewing class together, Freshman year High School, '70.  She is always, always there - even if we go a while - even months at times, between talks.   I was diagnosed with Lupus almost five years ago.

      You, Lynda, her family, and any lives that will grieve her absense, all have my prayers and heartfelt sympathy.  I believe that after death, your loved one is ALWAYS around - and now you have someone "up there" to give a helping hand when you need it!

      God bless you and yours.

      Thank you for sharing your tragedy with so many.  I know it has helped me realize one of life's gifts - like best friends.

      May your angels be with you and help to comfort you.  God bless.

      1. donotfear profile image82
        donotfearposted 13 years agoin reply to this

        So very comforting. Thank you so much.

    6. goldenpath profile image67
      goldenpathposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      Lupus is a brutal condition.  My heart rejoices for her valiance in the face of it for so many years.  Be rest assured that her spirit was strong enough and valiant enough to shoulder such a plague.  Though in life it seemed to wear down a good sister, yet in the twinkling of an eye it has now brought radiance, glory and blessings to her countenance and very being.  She is plagued no more and is now in the vast company of family and friends on the other side and now serves to advocate and cheer on those left behind. smile

      1. donotfear profile image82
        donotfearposted 13 years agoin reply to this

        Yes she is! I know she's laughing about the fact I had on the tie dye t-shirt today. Ha!!  Rejoice, she's out of pain!

        1. wyanjen profile image70
          wyanjenposted 13 years agoin reply to this

          As I read your post, I thought to myself - How perfect is that t-shirt?
          It's a little bit of a smile an otherwise devastating day.

          Take good care DNF - I'm so sorry for you loss.

          1. donotfear profile image82
            donotfearposted 13 years agoin reply to this

            Thank you....I was self conscience about how I was dressed at first, but her family set me at ease.

    7. yolanda yvette profile image61
      yolanda yvetteposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      I'm sorry for the loss of your dear friend.  I pray God's strength, comfort and peace be with you and all her loved ones.

  2. Play Free Games profile image56
    Play Free Gamesposted 13 years ago

    Sorry for your loss.

    1. donotfear profile image82
      donotfearposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      Thank you....I feel so tired.

  3. donotfear profile image82
    donotfearposted 13 years ago

    Thank you Putz Ballard. I've cried a lot.

  4. joaniemb profile image60
    joaniembposted 13 years ago

    My prayers are with you in your time of sorrow.

  5. Lisa HW profile image62
    Lisa HWposted 13 years ago

    Sorry to hear of her struggle, and your loss.

  6. Uninvited Writer profile image82
    Uninvited Writerposted 13 years ago

    It's hard to lose a friend. I lost one last summer, I had lost touch with her and hadn't seen her in about 7 years but it is still a shock and hurts.

    What a way for you to find out, I hope you find comfort soon.

  7. Anolinde profile image81
    Anolindeposted 13 years ago

    So sorry about your loss.

  8. mega1 profile image81
    mega1posted 13 years ago

    Hope you are taking good care of yourself.  I also know your pain.

  9. donotfear profile image82
    donotfearposted 13 years ago

    I'm so grateful for your responses. It makes me feel better. I just feel so strange....I guess cause it all happened so fast. I read the obit, I burst into tears, jump in my car, get to the chapel. Then I'm met by her family in the chapel who greet me with open arms saying, "WE tried to contact you!!  We couldn't find your right number and didn't know you last name" (Guess I've been married so many times they forgot).  I just haven t had time to prepare....found out about and buried her in one day within 2 hours.   Just too much.

    1. Randy Godwin profile image60
      Randy Godwinposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      Be thankful for the good memories you did have together.  Small consolation I know, but sometimes memories are all we possess of past friendships.

      Peace to you!

  10. profile image0
    kimberlyslyricsposted 13 years ago

    May Lynda forever be remembered in these permanent pages also.  I am so sorry, your pain I cannot imagine what it is like but I'm here anytime to listen just email anytime.  Know some of us believe she is with you as we speak, she will not go far, bless you and her family at such a difficult time.  We did however gain another angel, what a gift. Anytime, really

    1. donotfear profile image82
      donotfearposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      Thank you so much....this means a lot to me. You're right. She is here....and she loved the fact I had on a tie-dye T-shirt, jeans & sneakers at the service!! She would have shot me the Peace sign if she could, but she was too busy enjoying the company of others we know who have passed  on. She was an angel, a gracious one.

  11. Veronica Allen profile image71
    Veronica Allenposted 13 years ago

    Bless you Donotfear for your continued loyalty to your friend. I'm so sorry to hear of the loss of your best friend and the loss her family must feel right now.

    It is hard to find and keep good friends now a days, and when we lose one it makes a huge impact.“There exists a friend sticking closer than a brother.” (Proverbs 18:24).

    Please know that we are concerned and will keep you and her family in our thoughts and prayers.

    1. donotfear profile image82
      donotfearposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      You are so wonderful, Veronica. And always much appreciated.

  12. angela_michelle profile image94
    angela_michelleposted 13 years ago

    I'm so sorry for you loss. What a way to find out. I'll say a quick prayer for her family and you.

  13. prettydarkhorse profile image56
    prettydarkhorseposted 13 years ago

    HUGS to you Donotfear!

    1. donotfear profile image82
      donotfearposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      Hugs back, thanks!

  14. donotfear profile image82
    donotfearposted 13 years ago

    I just cannot thank everone enough for being so supportive. If I missed a personal response, please forgive me for the oversight. Just know that any condolence you sent to me was well recieved!!  I'm exhausted, but I'm wired to the bone.

    Yall are making me feel better. I feel like this is part of the family.

    1. profile image59
      logic,commonsenseposted 13 years ago

      Sorry to hear of your loss, DNF!
      While we may mourn ones loss, celebration of what they gave us while they were here is more meaningful than all the tears.
      Share the good things she brought to your life with others and she will always be with you.
      Take care.

      1. donotfear profile image82
        donotfearposted 13 years agoin reply to this

        I second that....we were totally the Thelma & Louise of the 70's. Joined at the hip during the summer of 76'. Good grief, it's a wonder we surivived at all! I feel her presence now. She's still laughing about the tie dye t-shirt I had on at the funeral!

    2. earnestshub profile image81
      earnestshubposted 13 years ago

      My heartfelt condolences DNF. Losing a dear friend is very sad. Since I lost my beautiful daughter-inlaw I have found solace in trying to emulate the way she was with my grandson, and the optimistic way she viewed life.
      My grandson took a long time to come to grips with the loss of his young mom.

      I smile whenever I think of her now some three years later, as to cope with the loss I made the decision to keep her memory close. Such lovely memories. Love to you from me and my family.

      1. donotfear profile image82
        donotfearposted 13 years agoin reply to this

        Thank you very much Earnest. I'm sorry you had such a trajic loss! I know it must have ripped you apart.  I have many memories of Lynda. She was the most sensitive person. Dealt with really tough things during adolescence. I like to picture her sitting on her horse Gin-Gin galloping recklessly down the road! Thanks for the well wishes.

    3. mythbuster profile image72
      mythbusterposted 13 years ago

      Take care of yourself well for a few more days, donotfear. You probably already know that grief can affect a person in a lot of unexpected ways (probably a bit of the reason why you're so tired today)...

      What you don't know is (j/k) that probably someone snapped a pic, when taking pics of family members and friends - and caught you in the corner of one pic while you were thinking, in your tie-dye t-shirt, you were out of range of the camera...and you'll probably also notice you had TP trailing out behind your shoe or something awfully embarrassing but "Themla-and-Louise-like," to boot...and then you'll probably be reminded of your friend again and cry s'more and feel really tired...

      And then.....

      I've said enough right? *hugs*

      stay well!

      1. donotfear profile image82
        donotfearposted 13 years agoin reply to this

        You just made me laugh...I'd be rolling if I wasn't so exhausted. Thank you! (don't know how long I can keep responding to these but I'm game and so wired & tired I feel like a Duracell battery)

    4. profile image0
      wordscribe41posted 13 years ago

      Donotfear, I am so very sorry to hear about your friend.  I can't imagine losing someone you've been through so much with.  You are in my thoughts, as well as her family.  Hugs to you.

    5. seamist profile image61
      seamistposted 13 years ago

      I'm so sorry about your loss. May God give you peace and comfort.

      1. Art 4 Life profile image60
        Art 4 Lifeposted 13 years agoin reply to this

        Annette, dear friend....my deepest sympathy.  You are always in my thoughts,..hang in there ...she is at peace now....Lynda will be missed, but she is now riding Gin Gin across God's pastures.....
        hugs to you across the miles...

        1. donotfear profile image82
          donotfearposted 13 years agoin reply to this

          Thanks Jan....looks like she got the victory anyway!!!!

    6. Daniel Carter profile image63
      Daniel Carterposted 13 years ago

      I know what this feels like as well. I'm so sorry for your loss. I'm so glad that you have so many good memories with her. I'm glad, also that you have a sense of being bonded together.

      Sending kindest and best to you.

      1. donotfear profile image82
        donotfearposted 13 years agoin reply to this

        Thank you Daniel....I'm feeling much more at peace today.

    7. myownworld profile image73
      myownworldposted 13 years ago

      Just reading this and wishing I had the right words to comfort and take away your pain. Losing a loved one is just one of those things where words are so limiting....pointless even and a silent hug is probably the best thing to give. But this is the only way we have of reaching you, so am sending you lots of love and prayers....
      Take care and just think of the happy memories you made together - I'm sure your friend wouldn't have it any other way... smile

      1. donotfear profile image82
        donotfearposted 13 years agoin reply to this

        Thank you....I just love you guys!

    8. lightning john profile image61
      lightning johnposted 13 years ago

      My heart goes out to you!  Peace and love to you.

    9. Origin profile image59
      Originposted 13 years ago

      I'm sorry for your loss, I know what it's like losing a friend that you've known for a long time, it can be a hard thing. Just remember her and who she was, and she'll live on still in your memories.

    10. Richieb799 profile image64
      Richieb799posted 13 years ago

      Aww she's really pretty, sorry for your loss..I lost my Granddad a month ago

    11. chigoiyke profile image59
      chigoiykeposted 13 years ago

      hmmm.. sorry dear. you shall soon get over it (I pray) and may she rest in perfect peace. Sad

    12. AEvans profile image73
      AEvansposted 13 years ago

      My heart goes out to you! ((Big Hugs)) smile

    13. DustinsMom profile image59
      DustinsMomposted 13 years ago

      Sorry to hear of your loss. What a great friend yo are to write a tribute. Keep your memories close to your heart, they will never leave you.

    14. lovelypaper profile image59
      lovelypaperposted 13 years ago

      How awful for you to find out like that. May God comfort you.


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