Lots of interesting answers! I went down this road many years ago and WE have survived. I used to blame myself, and through marital counseling, I found out it was him with severe insecurities and combined with alcohol it led him to cheat. It was not anything that I was or wasn't doing to make him happy. We were also very young with a lot of responsibility and stress.You have to find the root of the problem and do the best you can to put your heart and soul back together. It's REALLY hard but if the 2 of you want to be together, it is possible! Get your anger out now and then forget it. You can't throw it up in his face and punish him for the rest of his life, or it will never work, that will just push him further away. If he truly loves you, then he hurts just as bad as you do and maybe even more. Guilt is one of the worst feelings to live with. If he doesn't hurt then he's not worth it. People make mistakes! Was it a mistake? Ask questions (calmly, to find the problem), scream, cry, hyperventilate,and yell now, get it all out of your system, then forgive and forget. It takes a ton of work on both you and your husband's part, work that most people aren't willing to do. My husband and I were the exception and I hope you and your husband are too. You will be back at square one with trust but that will come with time and in the end you will be stronger and more in love than ever, if you truly love each other enough. If you need to leave for a while, then do it because you need to do it for yourself, but not to punish him.