Is it ok not to be ok?

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   tata22posted 12 years ago

   When you know that when you follow your heart it will not be ok...is it ok not to be ok?

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      couturepopcafeposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      When you say 'follow your heart' are you talking about some avocation, interest or talent?  Or are you talking about following your lust? which is often mistaken for your heart. 
      
      Anytime you follow your lust there is the danger of hurting or being hurt, even ruining lives.  Anytime you follow your passion, heart, talent, you will always grow in the right direction.  If you think you will hurt someone by doing this, those people who will make you feel guilty need to learn also.

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         tata22posted 12 years agoin reply to this

         Thanks couturepopcafe.  You have a point though I'm not talking here about lust - it's the last thing on my mind. lol.  I guess what I'm trying to say in this question is, when you follow your heart's desires and you feel guilty because most people will criticize and will not accept it and it's not ok with them...is it worth the try?

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      betterstuffposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      may be not  or for good

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      gabgirl12posted 12 years agoin reply to this

      I followed my heart recently. And I wasn't ok for awhile, but in the end it did turn out ok. I have peace. I think thats where you need to measure when following a feeling. Right or wrong is relative to the times. And it changes, and even then most people don't agree. So go with what brings you peace. I think for a long time I was 'follower'. I did what everyone told me and I wasn't happy. Finally I did something for myself, and they weren't very happy about it. I was put to shame, discouraged and basically told I wasn't going to anywhere as 'thats a crazy idea', but hey...I have peace and I dont regret my decision one bit even if it cost me a few tears.

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         tata22posted 12 years agoin reply to this

         Thanks for that very good and inspiring message gab.  I think you're right.  I'll make decisions which will give me peace of mind. ^_^

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      brandasaurposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      Your mind's telling you that ITS NOT OKAY. Weigh your options. Sometimes mind is what we need to to use in making decisions. Thats why brain is placed higher than our heart

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   Cardisaposted 12 years ago

   I you follow your heart and it will not be okay, then it can only cause misery in the end, to you and whom ever else is involved. What you do must be something you are prepared to live with or deal with.

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      tata22posted 12 years agoin reply to this

      Thank you Cardisa.

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         Sneha Sunnyposted 12 years agoin reply to this

         I agree, do what will not give you pain or struggle later, if you already know that whatever you're going to do is not going to work.

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            tata22posted 12 years agoin reply to this

            Thanks Sunny.  Sometimes following what your heart desires will truly make you happy.  But sometimes its hard to follow your heart because you know most people will not understand.

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   wildernessposted 12 years ago

   Sounds like you are asking is it OK to violate or ignore your ethical or moral standards.  The answer is NO - it demeans you and makes you less than you could be.  It opens the door for more rationalization and future incidents - it gives you future reason to do whatever you want irrespective of what you know to be right or wrong.

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      Mikel G Robertsposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      Nice.

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         wildernessposted 12 years agoin reply to this

         Thanks.  The human race has an almost unbelievable propensity and ability to rationalize - we can find acceptable reasons for whatever we want to do.  The ends justify the means.
         
         It is something in us that needs fought at every twist and turn of life's winding path.

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      tata22posted 12 years agoin reply to this

      Thanks Wilderness. Someone told me almost the same thought you have.  When you know deep down you're not doing the right thing then stop.  Because when you keep doing things beyond your ethical and moral standards, time will come that you can't discern what's right from wrong. 
      
      Thanks for reminding me these things wilderness.

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   Disturbiaposted 12 years ago

   I guess it all depends on what "not Ok" means.  If "not Ok" means you want to be a serial killer, then I'd have to say no.  But if it means something like you are challenged in some way either physically or mentally or that you see the world with a different point of view that is not harmful to yourself or anyone else, then I'd say sure, it's perfectly OK to not be OK

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      tata22posted 12 years agoin reply to this

      Yes you're right Disturbia.  I think "not OK" is subjective.  What is ok with others might not be with some.  It always depends on how we understand things and accept them as right or wrong.  So long as you don't do harm to anyone and you're happy with it, then there's no reason not to follow your heart.

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   miss butterflyposted 12 years ago

   Your heart will never want to follow something that is "Not Ok"...

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      tata22posted 12 years agoin reply to this

      Maybe you're right Ms Butterfly.  Because in the end, it's you who'll gonna suffer the hurt.

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   tobey100posted 12 years ago

   Huh?  I loved to chime in on this one but I don't understand the question.  Are you saying even though you know it's gonna turn out bad is it ok to do it anyway?  Wanna buy a good used car?

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      tata22posted 12 years agoin reply to this

      Thanks Tobey.  I think what I'm trying to say is, is it ok to be happy and be hurt in the end?hahaha...

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         tobey100posted 12 years agoin reply to this

         I would say yes!  I think it'd be worth it.

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            tata22posted 12 years agoin reply to this

            Thanks Tobey. ^_^

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   miss butterflyposted 12 years ago

   Just like you gabgirl12...I too have begun to do things for myself rather than doing what everyone else wants me to do.  I find that these days I am much more happier than I have ever been.  Sometimes following your heart means doing things they may not seem "okay" to others. In the end, we all have to face our decisions and choices. I like to look back and smile at all the choices I have made...even if those choices were not the most popular :-)

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   knolyourselfposted 12 years ago

   Ok is in the eye of the beholder.

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      billabongbobposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      And we are all very good at fooling ourselves when it suits us

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   billabongbobposted 12 years ago

   I followed my heart and stuck to it for 2 decades, biiiiiig mistake. As of today I am free, my divorce is final. I spent 20 years not being ok, but now I'm returning to who I really am and wish I had done it years ago.

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    prettydarkhorseposted 12 years ago

    Maybe you are worried about social acceptance, (friends, family) it depends on the setting and culture you are in, just try to tell them that this is your call.
    
    You live and you always learn. Life is a big gamble, you will never know the outcome of things, just always live by your values, then prepare for the consequences sp. if they are negative.

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       tata22posted 12 years agoin reply to this

       Thanks for that ms pretty...I like your line "Life is a big gamble, you will never know what the outcome of things, just always live by your values..."  This is true. While it is true that all things happen for a reason, it is on how we perceive things that are happening around us and how we respond to them.  We just need to make sure not to do anything beyond our boundaries (ethics and moral values).

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