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When Is It Right For A Girl To Sleep With A Boy For The First Time?

  1. ngureco profile image83
    ngurecoposted 8 years ago

    When Is It Right For A Girl To Sleep With A Boy For The First Time?

    Should It Be Before Adolescence, After Adolescence, After Eighteen Years, After 21 Years, Or After Marriage?

  2. sasanqua profile image79
    sasanquaposted 8 years ago

    Whenever the girl feels ready! If she is ready to have sex when she is 18 and unmarried, then that is her decision. No-one else can make that decision for her. If she wants to wait until she is married, that is also her decision. I personally am against young teenagers having sex, but again, it is their choice to do this.

  3. dabeaner profile image56
    dabeanerposted 8 years ago

    The rules are arbitrary, set by whatever society they are in.  There is no universal standard.  Reality doesn't care.  "Legal" age varies from one U.S. State and one country to another.  Pick your "legal" age: 14, 16, 18...  Pick your religious standard:  Whenever, OK if engaged, OK if married...

    BRITANNUS (shocked):
      Caesar, this is not proper.
    THEODOTUS (outraged):
    CAESAR (recovering his self-possession):
      Pardon him, Theodotus; he is a barbarian, and thinks that the customs of his tribe and island are the laws of nature.

                      Caesar and Cleopatra, Act II -- [George Bernard Shaw]

  4. Sunga profile image60
    Sungaposted 8 years ago

    After marriage, which should be done at a good age (physically  meaning when her body is mature). Again mature depends on a number of factors.

    The best is within the safety, fun and freedom of marriage

  5. OhKathryn profile image61
    OhKathrynposted 8 years ago

    I think it's when you are ready and prepared. I would say wait till after your 18 because we don't think the same as we do now then when we were younger. Everyone should ALWAYS practice safe sex.

  6. akandug profile image57
    akandugposted 8 years ago

    Morally, it should be after marriage. Our society may have different answers to this but there is no standard that supercedes THE MORAL STANDARD.

  7. personaltraining profile image49
    personaltrainingposted 8 years ago

    whenever she feels ready. But try to choose partners wisely, and always use protection!

  8. khood1357 profile image62
    khood1357posted 8 years ago

    In today's society sex is often over rated and turns into  something people just do, my opinion is to make sure that you love the person and absolutely can not live with out them before you sleep with them. No one can tell you how you feel, but be sure that you are prepared for the consequences such as pregnancy. If you are ready to sleep with a boy, then you are capable of carrying a child.

  9. TnFlash profile image60
    TnFlashposted 8 years ago

    I think they should wait until she is physically and mentally mature enough to understand exactly what she is getting into.  Once she reaches this level of maturity, then the choice of when and with who is totally hers.  I think some girls get into it at too early an age because it makes them fell they are more mature. This is non-sense.

  10. profile image50
    Caraes23posted 8 years ago

    In regards to age, I feel that once a woman has reached the age of 18 she is her own person and has the right to make such a decision for herself.  However, I feel that sex itself should be discussed with our children when they reach an age of understanding so that when they do reach the age of adulthood, they will be able to make mature, responsible and safe decisions.  Sex does not neccesarily need to occur only after marraige, however I do feel that sex should be sought not as a trivial matter but as one of importance and thus should be done with someone you share an intimacy and caring for.  Again though, to each their own.

  11. nasus loops profile image69
    nasus loopsposted 8 years ago

    There is no right or wrong age for when a girl sleeps with a boy/man for the first time.  Obviously the older they are the better, as they will be mature enough to hopefully make the right decisions and not be pushed into anything.  However some girls do mature earlier than others, so it is not necessarily wrong for a girl of 14/15 to sleep with someone if they themselves feel ready.  They may have been in a relationship with a guy for some time and feel that they are ready for the next step. 

    Conclusion: If they are mature enough to make the right decisions then they are old enough to sleep with someone.  The right decisions being able to ensure that contraception is used.  No young person is ready for a child not matter how much they think they are!

  12. Specialk3749 profile image61
    Specialk3749posted 8 years ago

    AFTER Marriage!  Any sex before marriage is called the sin of fornication.  Yes people, it is sin!  Sex is to meant to be holy and between two married people (one man and one woman) who are committed to each other.  Our society has taken something that was meant to be Holy and made it a leisurely past time...we even watch it on TV!  This is the only way to prevent out of wedlock pregnancy and STD's.

  13. eric.swanson profile image61
    eric.swansonposted 7 years ago

    The only time a girl should sleep with a guy is after marriage.

  14. johncouncel profile image52
    johncouncelposted 7 years ago

    A girl should keep herself , till after marriage, this standard is God ordained, the fact is a girl should not sleep with a boy,but her husband, we should all join hand to campaign against sex before marriage.

  15. Ofili profile image55
    Ofiliposted 7 years ago

    Things are changing at the speed of light.if you ar going into a relation even at 13yr,you must know that lot of thing7 are involve in it.the love care and sex which your lover wil always demand for.but biblically it should be after mariage.

  16. dpfitzell profile image74
    dpfitzellposted 7 years ago

    Many people ask the question: When is the right time or age to have sex? This is not always an easy question to answer. Is it when you are 16,18, when you get married? When is the right time? There are many reasons why people want to sleep together.... read more

  17. dpfitzell profile image74
    dpfitzellposted 7 years ago

    There are many reasons why people want to sleep together. We all make bad decisions sometimes even if that is having sex at an improper age or having sex with a person that may be wrong for you. If you do decide to have sex just make sure to use protection because that is a bad decision that may have consequences that cannot be changed, like an std or unwanted pregnancy. Overall it is your choice to make and nothing anyone says is going to change that. If you make a bad choice (if it is one) does not make you a bad person, all of us make bad decisions in our lives at times and it is part of being a human being.

  18. profile image53
    fallsfellaposted 7 years ago

    The first time you sleep with a person of the opposite gender is on your wedding night.  Yes, I know a lot of you are going to roll your eyes in your head and think that answer is outdated and outmoded but it is the correct answer.  Too many young people are eager to rush to have sex and then find out it wasn't what they thought it was, find it uncomfortable (both boys & girls) and find there is a sence of something lost.  Girls often feel cheap and dirty and the boys feel the same way because they didn't wait.
      Wait, you'll enjoy it much better if you do.

  19. Obscure Divine profile image56
    Obscure Divineposted 7 years ago

    Outside of laws, religions, and man-made forced morals from different geographical orders of conduct, I think we should let nature do the talking, like the humanoids used to do - back in the prehistoric era and even more recent than that:  If they're able to bleed (menstruate)  they are able to breed...  Besides, sex should be an individual right, not for someone else to dictate some absurd law upon thee...  Geez!

  20. profile image43
    speaking treeposted 7 years ago

    Do we ask when is right time for attract to opposite sex??

    No, Because there we don't see any thing wrong and you know why because most of time it left unexpressed & always kept one's inside.

    Appropriate time for Sleeping first time for girl or boy  should not be any yardstick or defined set of rule it your world dear.

    And what we say moral & immoral what is it & who has decided what is moral and what not.  Sex is same as satisfaction its like satiating your hunger or quenching your thrust.

    It sholud only be between two person mutual consent & if two are mutually agree than both know what is right for them.

  21. Journey2244 profile image60
    Journey2244posted 7 years ago

    If you are using the word Girl and Boy, then no.  You should wait until you are mature enough to deal with what come with it, by that I mean the emotional ties and committment.

  22. REALCHICK365 profile image55
    REALCHICK365posted 7 years ago


  23. alley11 profile image58
    alley11posted 7 years ago

    There is no right time. I believe that if BOTH the boy and girl agree, then to go for it. But, do know there may be consequences. These include STDs, and a possible pregnancy. Make sure to use birth control and a condom. Also, if you are religious, your religion may have different "rules" about this so you may want to look into this. Good luck! smile

  24. profile image47
    inc999posted 7 years ago

    this question there are two side. is it a religion question? or a being question?. if it a religion question most religions and sects ask todo sex after marriage.  if not when ever you feel you are ready to do it. you can.

    We, the sayed "human" we try to complecate life. why we don't ask when a chicken or a cow  or a dankey can do sex? We need to learn from our animal friends. they do every thing right.

  25. profile image47
    Abdul_Rahmonposted 7 years ago

    Age really matters but,when both are eighteen & above,i think they can make love when both agree 2do such.

  26. profile image47
    M.clutchposted 7 years ago

    the right time is when they are married, this is the onlt time that it is accepted by GOD. before then it's a sin.

  27. profile image0
    brotheryochananposted 7 years ago

    ya all miss the point completely. The right time for a woman to have sex is right after marrying the fellah she loves, right after graduating university :0).
    University aside:
    You see we all take things we get; even virginity and we abuse it, throw to the dogs, have abortions, get pregnant too young, stuffin biggies up our buts. All this is temporary and in the long run unfulfilling.
    Gods intended way is for the newly married couple to experiment together, to honor each other and learn and grow in this area. The husband gets the virgin tightness of the female and she doesn't get to compare his pecker to 50 other men.
    The deflowering process should be endearing, not done during a drunken night under pressure of your peers, but with tenderness and permanability for the future. Losing virginity together to each other is a bonding process that will never dissolve. God is most wise.

  28. profile image0
    da_bizkidposted 7 years ago

    only if she of age it really doesn't matter really, it depends on the moment and the chemistry that is between the two but i think after she's 18 and when she ready to deal with real life.

  29. Guy Collins profile image59
    Guy Collinsposted 7 years ago

    After adolescence when they both have a clue what they're doing.

    Everything changes after you have sex. You look at people in a different light. If you're still in grade or high school, obviously this isn't the time to start. You should have other priorities.

    Date - yes. Sex - not yet. If you can wait until you're 18 great. If you can't, think about pregnancy and STDs.

  30. dhaani profile image51
    dhaaniposted 7 years ago

    You can rarely win over hormones!! THAT IS A FACT.The age  should be when the girl understands how she may become pregnant, if careless and the boy makes sure that its not an experiment.Sex is a powerful and one of the most fulfilling experiences ..so better not spoil the first time.Protection is a must.A girl can be 13 or 30 when  she gives in to it.Let the reasons be right.

  31. karent profile image63
    karentposted 7 years ago

    Both the boy and the girl need to be ready and that readiness can depend on many factors.  Physical maturity is the main thing most people consider.  Mental maturity is often overlooked or misunderstood.  Just because the hormones are raging during the teenage years doesn't mean that a person is ready for sex.  They have the physical drive for it, but lack the maturity to cope with the consequences.  Faith/religion also has to be considered as most (if not all) religions have guidelines regarding sexual activity.  I know there are a lot of people who hate the idea of sex being subject to a morality discussion, but there are a lot of emotions involved in sexual intercourse.  I wish I had waited for marriage to have my first sexual experience.  It would have been a better environment for the kinds of emotions I felt.  Instead, I felt like I had given something intensely personal of myself only to be tossed away later.  Without the commitment, it did more harm than good for me.  There is a difference and people should consider that before jumping in.

  32. HunterGiftBaskets profile image60
    HunterGiftBasketsposted 7 years ago

    Sleeping with someone, in a friendly environment with peace and calm can be a meaningful learning experience - as opposed to doing it totally drunk on the side of the road for a couple of minutes.
    So, setting is important, as is the depth of the relationship.  Best to wait a bit, but then again positive, caring experiences withour expoiltation are marvellous....
    Ultimately for the girl to decide, not for some old grey men to dictate...

  33. Jill47 profile image56
    Jill47posted 7 years ago

    the precondition should be adolescence (both the girl and the boy), then no other. it is her free for a girl to do that, but she should know how to protect herself from...(pregnant or sth else). i personally recommend a girl to have sex with a boy when they love each other. it's not a good idea to be a experienced in this aspect.

  34. blackreign2012 profile image66
    blackreign2012posted 7 years ago

    The best time to wait is as long as you can. With the high std rate, unplanned pregnancy, etc. Its just best to focus on other things besides sex. I know society has basically given young folks a free pass to screw like they work at home depot but to be frank; whether you male or female promiscuity is just plain nasty. Everytime you sleep with someone; you share your spirit with them. The more people you sleep with the more of your spirit is being depleated. Not that my opinon means anything and grown people will do what they want. Sex is not just something to cap off the night or pass the time. It's a glorious exchange between two people who plan on being together at least for a while. Not casually like slipping on a pair of underwear. And I say it is NOT a teenagers choice whether or not to have sex, we need to stop with that propaganda. Until they are eighteen they are under the parents responsibility. Yes you can keep up with them. That is the jedi mind trick of the superstructure to make parents think they are powerless against what their children do and that is simply not so. Or if you don't allow them to do what they choose somehow they will turn out even more wild etc. Which is another myth. Your children follow your lead; period. You have to talk to them and make sure they understand what exactly it means to have sex and the dangers.. all of them, in graphic detail. Videos, and other visual aids can be helpful. Society gives teens too much power they don't deserve. When you are being raised you don't get a vote. WIth that said; if that doesn't work and you find out your teen is sexually active then you must get over yourself intervene and make sure they are safe. Denial is not just a river in egypt. It could put your teen in danger if you swim in it too long. Once they are eighteen there is not much you can do if they decide to have sex. Before then though you must do EVERYTHING you can to prevent it. Letting teens do what they choose can have really messed up consequences.

  35. ng0208 profile image56
    ng0208posted 7 years ago

    A girl or boy for that matter should not have sex until they are mature enough to understand all the things that come with having sex.  They need to be physically, but also mentally mature enough to understand there can be consequences to this choice such as stds or an unplanned pregnancy.  There is no way to sit here and put an age on it, but they should wait until the time and moment is right otherwise they are throwing away a huge moment in their life.  It is a decision every person has to make for themselves and I don't think there is a textbook answer here.

  36. karobi profile image67
    karobiposted 7 years ago

    This is a very critical question. However, different people and society view this issue from different angle. But As somebody have rightly said, ' once a lady has had sex not only a ladyy even the boy their view about life change drastically', now this view might affect she/he negetively or positively depending on the circumstances surrounding the event. So in my own view it would be of great important for a girl or boy to have sex after marriage if possible.

  37. gopalluv profile image53
    gopalluvposted 7 years ago

    when boy & girl ready for sex than it is correct but it also depend on the maturity of boy & girl. it is also depend on age of boy & girl

  38. Raven1001 profile image72
    Raven1001posted 7 years ago

    I believe every girl must decide for themselves when they feel ready.  And any time I've given that advise the next question is "How do I know I'm ready?"  The easiest analogy I could think to explain it - think of your most embarrassing secret. Would you feel comfortable telling it to this person? Sex makes you feel vunerable, like someone knowing something about you no else does. And if they're the right person that brings you closer together. If they're not , emotionally if feels like someone is revealing an embarassing secret about you to others.
    I tend to have a knee jerk reaction to religiously based answers to this question. While studying theology years ago I discovered how the church taught everyone that women had no souls and the pain of child birth was a punishment for the sins of Eve. ( I know it's not fair to judge the faiths of today for that,  it's just a gut reaction). So if waiting for marriage feels right for you , go for it.

  39. HealthInfo profile image59
    HealthInfoposted 7 years ago

    There is no right answer that will fit everyone. You must make sure that you feel ready and are responsible enough to use protection each and EVER time you have sex.

    My personal thoughts are to wait until after you are 18, at least that is what I hope my children will do. As a mother of a child who is only 15 years younger than myself I wish that I had waited, but of course would never trade my child for anything in the world. Life as a teen mom, which can be a result of having sex early, is hard.

    Always remember that you can only give your virginity to one person, one time. This special gift should never be wasted on someone who wont value it later.

  40. JulianneL2g profile image34
    JulianneL2gposted 7 years ago

    I'd say wait. No matter how tempting or how much in love we feel at that moment. By waiting, both parties are put to test on how much they each respect the other's freedom of choice. I remember a girlfriend of mine once shared with me that she and her boy decided to wait until they were both married. And they did! Till this day, as parents to 2 beautiful kids, they have complete trust, complete respect towards each other. Another girlfriend of mine who threw caution to the wind and slept with her boyfriend then. Their relationship were always rocky, both are always suspicious of one another because they felt the other can't be trusted and both parties have no self control and are individuals who seeks immediate self gratification sort. So, I'd say the same to my daughter. Just wait. It will be worth it all.

  41. Galadriel Arwen profile image74
    Galadriel Arwenposted 7 years ago

    I am old fashion and religious so...........Never until you are married. You can get pregnant, my mother did the 1st time - So, don't do it until you are prepared to be a parent!

  42. Harlan Colt profile image76
    Harlan Coltposted 7 years ago

    When Is It Right For A Girl To Sleep With A Boy For The First Time?

    I believe this is an "opinion" question.
    My opinion is, after marriage, same for the male. There is no bias here because of the individual's male/female status.

    I think some considerations that should be on the table before people answer this question is:

    Are their benefits of having sex at an early age? (None)
    Are there social benefits for having sex at an early age? (No)
    Are there potential risks? Oh yea!
    Are there social risks? Oh yea!
    Is there a social costs at risk? Public health costs, single-mother, welfare, food stamps, child mental health, etc., etc. (Yes)
    Are there benefits for having sex before marriage? (No)
    Are there benefits for after marriage? (Yes)
    What are the potential risks? (Many)
    Does the short-term pleasure of a roll in the hay, offset the risks and potential personal and social cost to society? (No)

    Or should it just be all about me and what I want right now?

    A society is about us all. The more you live for "I want what I want," the harder you make life for everyone else somewhere along the way. Your behavior has consequences unto yourself, people around you and people you'll never meet.

    We have a responsibility to each other and our kids, not our genitles.

    Name one benefit for society or even one other person - besides the few minutes of joy in having sex before marriage.

    For every benefit you can name I can name two or more negatives. Name one that's not totally weak and lame - then I may accept your answer to when a girl (or a boy) should have sex.

    Thats my opinion.
    - Harlan

  43. Apostle Jack profile image61
    Apostle Jackposted 7 years ago

    When you get married.Have something to look
    foward to besids a ring ,have a personal

  44. yvens profile image60
    yvensposted 7 years ago

    Being a father of girls it is really hard to answer this question without becoming or even sounding bias.  I will try my best.
    My personal view for when isit right for a girl to sleep with a boy for the first time is that before we can start to comtenplete when we should analyse the question.  Are talking about a girl or a teenager?
    I do not agree with young girls engaging in sexual activities for the following reasons:
    1) They are girls
    2) Most of them is peer preassure
    3) They are ready or qualified to cope with the consequences.

    Now for a teen/young woman if they are truelly ready and understand completly what they are getting into and the consequences I think it can only be the most beautifull experience in the World.  It all boils down to the mentally and the reason behind it, those that have reached early adulthood do not need to look for a one night stand, but try their best to understand as much as they can about love , seriously in the end that is the only thing that we all crave and strive for and most of the older generation still have a lot to learn about love.
    So if you think you are ready and tottally understand what could happen then I guess you are problably ready, or at least ready bloom from a young woman into a woman.

  45. craftyzen profile image74
    craftyzenposted 7 years ago

    at every possible opportunity. On the sofa, on the rug, on the chair, under the chair, in a house, out of a house, in a box, out of the box, in the pool, in the ocean, here there and everywhere.

  46. goldie77 profile image42
    goldie77posted 7 years ago

    After marriage otherwise you could end up with a life of regrets, and you will always feel used when it ends

  47. caryanderson profile image58
    caryandersonposted 7 years ago

    Your virginity can be the only thing that you share with the person you marry and no one else has to have it. It is a special gift God gave  you so that you could show the world your love between you and your spouse. Another advantage of waiting until marriage is that you can make sure that the person that you have an attraction to is the one you want to give your virginity to and have children with. Marriage is not to be entered into just because you want to have sex ovecourse, but it comes with responsibility that both parties have in taking care of each other. Most marriages end if there is only a mere attraction and no one wants to take responsibility over the other one.When sex happens and a girl gets pregnant and a boy feels forced to marry her for the sake of the baby, It isn't fair to the baby because the parents don't Love each other.How are they going to show the Baby how to Love or handle a serious relationship, when they can't handle one themselves.

    Enjoy your youth and explore living so that when you do find that someone, you can teach them ll the things in life that young parents who are not married never get to experience. You will be the way to a childs knowledge, interests and good decision making skills. Be fair to them and yourself.

  48. ItsYourLife profile image54
    ItsYourLifeposted 7 years ago

    When they are in legal age, and it feels like the right thing to do.

  49. profile image55
    eldritchposted 7 years ago

    You should sleep with a boy if you feel it is right.

    Peer pressure, your parental values, the opinion of hubbers etc are all irrelevant. Make up your own damn mind.

    Great sex is unfortunately not always the product of a loving relationship, but it does help quite a lot. If you just want sex, or the boy does, then either don't go through with it, or accept that is all there is to it. Be aware that people can be quite deceptive in order to get you into bed.

    If you go ahead with it then be careful to use protection and/or birth control for obvious reasons.

  50. JonesChicago profile image55
    JonesChicagoposted 7 years ago

    This question really pertains to both sexes and thus I would answer as such. The determination of when it is right for a girl or a boy to sleep with the other for the first time falls to that individual. There is no wrong or right answer here, only a decision to be made as to whether he/she feels the time is right. A lot of the decision will of course be based on upbringing, influence and prior discussions on the matter of sleeping with someone with family and friends. I myself lost my virginity to a girl that was by no means a virgin. However, when the moment arrived I decided that it was the right time for me, for my development etc. I was 19 and I have no regrets. A decision like this is a personal one and should be his/her own decision, not to be interfered with by family or friends. We all have 1, some of us more, lays that we wished we had chosen otherwise but that in itself is apart of living and learning.