What is the most important thing/ characteristic you look for in a mate? What is a deal breaker?
The importance must be a matter concerned with a person's choice.
I love a sense of humor, admire tolerance and patience. But my mate is a thunderbolt revelation. I don't look for anything.
There he is - as though he was meant for me, and there is no explanation.
It's just the miracle of finding my mate. That's 'the thing'
Then through time there are aspects of him that I love and some that get on my nerves (and vice versa), but being mutually intelligent about how precious the love is - that's the most important characteristic.
Being tolerant because we are all human (and full of faults), is just as important.
A deal breaker would be to become bored beyond belief with my mate. But that seems impossible because through love we could find ways to keep charming each other. The love is permanent and we always knew it - from that first 'thunderstruck' moment.
A person with whom you share your activity and accommodation needs to be friendly and helping. His way of addressing should be good which suits you so that you are in a position to share things with him openly . If he or she possesses the quality of being a good mate, anyone would love to be friendly with such a person.
Colored eyes is like the first thing that attracts me towards a person, secondly someone athletic and having a good sense of humor, these things are that i always want in my guy.
Intelligence. I don't joke with that. She just has to be highly intelligent to keep me attracted and interested mentally!
As an older (boomer) and experienced woman....I want to commend you on your own intelligence....for your comment. Also, kudos to a young man who puts this importance ahead of some "other" traits I don't care to mention here. Bless you!
Yes intelligence is very important and can be a deal breaker!
Happily ever after? Sorry - gotta cheat and give 3: compassion, absolute unflinching, well-thought-out and kind *honesty*, patience - and not the placating kind - the kind that comes from understanding another's difficulties and loving him/her just the same, or even all that much more.
Just keep on walkin'/hit the %$!# road? Being manipulative, shallow, impatient, dishonest and/or being materially needy or constantly demanding (through word or 'tude) that you "prove your love".
There are lots of traits I look for but I suppose the most (important) characteristic and foundation for any type of relationship is HONESTY.
A "deal breaker" is anything that you feel is the complete opposite of what you want or need in a relationship or marriage. It doesn't mean one person is "right" or the other person is "wrong". It just means you don't agree on something major. Ultimately we are all looking for someone who has the same value system and agrees with us on the major things in life. Opposites may attract in the short-term but it's like that attracts like in the long-term.
There is no amount of "communication" or "work" that can overcome being with someone who does not want what you want. One man's opinion! :-)
Oddly enough, I met a man who is a lot like me in personality, but we live in different worlds. I'm liberal, he's anti-climate change. I've travelled a lot, he hardly has. It's been hard, but we're opening up and the heart link feels wonderful.
Niki,the person has to be trustworthy and honest! These are the most important things to me when choosing a mate. We all have our shortcomings, for example, the person may be lazy, not that smart, and so on. These shortcomings I can certainly live with, but when it comes to dishonesty and untrustworthy, I don't want to touch this person not even with a "Ten Foot Pole".
a person who does what they say they will do.
honesty and sharing.
deal breaker ? breaking a promise and not controlling things in life which are controllable.
yeah, sounds personal doesn't it.
But what is controllable? I think I get your want of s/he who can accept personal responsibility, but what is reasonable is subjective, and varies to cosmic proportions from one to another. A CEO can steer the ship. A clerk can transfer a call.
He must be: a Christian, be wise and honest and kind, and able to make me laugh. Meanness is a deal breaker.
I don't think there is one particular characteristic. Assuming that there are a number of men or women with equal qualifications on every aspect, real or perceived, one would almost always just choose one.
We cannot choose whom to love. We just love
It has got to do with "memory".
The heart is at the center of it all. It has it's own reasons, not always perceptible to the conscious mind...perhaps I am being overly romantic..
Honesty and a true heart... it's something you feel more than anything else. It makes the loving and the person all the sweeter. I am speaking from experience.
A deal breaker is simple... if the person puts you first... above everything else... then that settles it for me...
Using past tense here, as in what did I look for.....? In all honesty, I don't know that I purposely "looked for" (subconciously, this may be true for all of us).....as much as I'm sure about what would have attracted me to a particular man. Level of intelligence was high on my list with healthy sense of humor, following closely behind. I also kept my sharp radar out for their regard and respect for "women" in general.
Since you're very young (by your pic) I would like to pass on to you some of the very best advice, based on YEARS of experience and wisdom.....about something to "look for" in a good man........That he has a very healthy respect for his mother (& sisters if any) and a strong family bond of love.........AND....IMPORTANT....that it goes nowhere near the point of "Mama's Boy." Watch for that fine line.
Never date a bona-fide Mama's Boy.
Deal Breakers? any sort of harmful addiction (drugs, alcohol, gambling....BAD!)
I look for exclusiveness as a major characteristic; someone who only wants to have a monogamous relationship with me. The deal breaker is when he needs/wants more than one woman or if he is not financially responsible.
a person who need our presence in there whole life.
a person who can take care about us
I think that includes all
i look for honesty and characteristics that are encouraging. i look for originality and fun someone who is loyal and has strong friendship values also someone who is supportive and a encouraging critic good friends are hard to find.
She should always look gorgeous and beautiful at the heart also,brains also.i mean a complete women she should be.she should be beautiful and spiritual as well.
One must be highly intelligent, educated, & successful socioeconomically & come from an educated, solidly middle, upper middle, or upper class family. One must be kind & progressive, that goes without saying. Also, one must came from a small to medium size family.
The deal breaker is the mate putting the family of origin before a spouse & child/children. Such a person is a liability & has no business being married nor a parent. Other deal breakers is coming from a poor family. People who come from poor families although successful have family members who are socioeconomic leeches-freeloaders who expect the former to foot their bills & provide them w/a better lifestyle on the former's dime. Lastly, would never enter into a relationship w/a person from a large family-again- in such families, there is a tendency to put the family of origin first & of course, in large families, there are socioeconomic leeches who expect financial support.
by Joana e Bruno 12 years ago
What is the most important characteristic you look for in a friend?
by dashingscorpio 8 years ago
Do you distinguish a difference between your "deal breakers" and "red flags" when dating?If you observe something you consider to be a "red flag" or potential problem in a relationship is it an automatic "deal breaker" for you? or Do you take a wait and see...
by GreenEyes1607 7 years ago
If you're interested in someone, do you view distance as a deal breaker or just a challenge?
by lisasuniquevoice 11 years ago
Is distrust a deal breaker in a relationship?
by Micha ELa 3 years ago
I would like to know your take on this is if you are in a committed relationship and with a child, will you continue living with your partner or leave him/her?
by dashingscorpio 12 years ago
If cheating is a “deal breaker” for you: Does it carry a statue of limitation?A 99-year old Italian man is filing for divorce after discovering letters from an affair his wife had over 60 years ago.They have been married for 77 years. She reportedly confessed but was unable to convince him to stay....
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