Can you really have a relationship with someone you don't trust.

Jump to Last Post 101-150 of 240 discussions (265 posts)
  1. peachpurple profile image82
    peachpurpleposted 8 years ago

    nope, you can't  put your trust in a relationship at all if you can't trust a person. Might as well don't get into it then you will not regret

  2. Dudley Doright profile image61
    Dudley Dorightposted 8 years ago

    This is rather an old question, but I'm drawn to give my two cents. It's time to study the persons character if you don't trust them. If they cheated, why did they cheat? Some people have impulse problems and are easy to pick out of a crowd. They may not mean or intend to cheat, but when confronted with a dilemma they may not think things through properly. These people are particularly problematic because they may be good people and may not mean to cheat, but they do anyway and will continue to do so. An impulsive person will continue to be impulsive, that a simple fact.

    How to spot these people? Simple, bring them to a grocery store and watch what they pick up especially in the cashier's line. If they are buying stuff they don't need simply because it's in front of them and they have a history of cheating, run...

    1. Dayana moon profile image58
      Dayana moonposted 8 years ago

      no, if you can't trust the person how you will be able to be in a relationship you don't trust him/her. it will end up sooner or later and all will be with you is marks of  broken relationship and it will effect or further choices in life as well.

    2. creativewriter123 profile image60
      creativewriter123posted 8 years ago

      First give it some time and see what happens. If trust is still a issue between you two, talk about it and them maybe part your ways on friendly terms.

    3. pstraubie48 profile image76
      pstraubie48posted 8 years ago

      Perhaps you could have a relationship on some level perhaps as an acquaintance. But if this is someone that you are considering giving your heart to then I would have to say no.
      At least for me in a romantic relationship if I cannot trust the person to be faithful to me then it would never work.If I found I could not expect that, then all bets are off.
      That is how my marriage ended back in 1981 after 9 years...

    4. Joyfulcrown profile image75
      Joyfulcrownposted 8 years ago

      I don't think you have a relationship without trust.   But I belief if you are open you can build trust up again.

    5. CrescentSkies profile image66
      CrescentSkiesposted 8 years ago

      Well you can have a relationship, but if you don't trust them it can't become serious for you.

      1. Carol Reed profile image60
        Carol Reedposted 7 years agoin reply to this

        Relationships sometimes are like a one-way street and when trust isn't there it becomes unhealthy and unsafe like driving the wrong way on a one-way street.

    6. profile image0
      MrDanielAbramposted 8 years ago

      No you should be able to trust anyone you are in a relationship with.

    7. erinshelby profile image74
      erinshelbyposted 7 years ago

      I don't think the question is *can* you have a relationship but *should* you.. If you're married, it's obvious that you would want to stay because you've made a commitment, and if this person has betrayed you, they should show a willingness to work on the relationship and regain your trust (which takes time- it doesn't happen overnight). If you're dating, however, and they've proven to be untrustworthy through their actions or their character, then what is the point?

    8. Vonda Gee profile image58
      Vonda Geeposted 7 years ago

      Oh WOW.................................................................!

    9. profile image49
      becca-pposted 7 years ago

      I believe you can depending on the trust issues that are to be had. It could be rather difficult constantly wondering if your partner is ever betraying you.

    10. sandeep15r profile image76
      sandeep15rposted 7 years ago

      No, It's no point in being in a relationship if you don't trust the person you are with. It will kill you each moment. So, the better is to trust and enjoy the bliss of a relationship.

    11. Isa Levine profile image61
      Isa Levineposted 7 years ago

      I think you can still have a relationship with someone you don't trust but if you want it to lasts or maybe considering marrying that person one day trust is a must ,Well, I guess it still boils down to where that relationship is heading. If your looking for someone to be with for a while and be totally not emotionally attached well  trust is not a big deal. And one thing to consider is the feelings of the other person it depends if their sensitive or observant, because they would eventually sense that you don't trust them. Well, for me TRUST is one of the foundations of a good relationship.

      Asses first why don't you trust him/her, why can't you easily give your trust. Figure out the root cause of your trust issues.

      Hope this helps

    12. Medusa13 profile image77
      Medusa13posted 7 years ago

      Who is the person with the real issue? Is the other person truly untrustworthy based on actual actions? Or does the partner have trust issues due to being hurt in the past while the person whom they are with has given them no real reason to not trust him or her? This may make a difference in whether or not the relationship can progress. The former can mostly never work because you cannot change an untrustworthy person. However, with the latter, a person with trust issues can get help with those issues and eventually have successful relationships.

    13. lucabrandt profile image64
      lucabrandtposted 7 years ago

      Never. Why would you want to? Relationships are about sharing experiences, personality, time, and sometimes a home and finances.  Why would you share anything with someone you don't trust? Of course, if the problem is you having a hard time trusting people, you need to evaluate the situation and decide whether this person is worth the stress they will unintentionally be inflicting on you.

    14. profile image48
      Kayla Lynn Cposted 7 years ago

      You could try to have a relationship with someone that you don't really trust, however most relationships are based on trust. If you stay in a relationship where there is no trust, I can almost guarantee you that someone will end up leaving the relationship.

    15. profile image52
      ERICKS Melendezposted 7 years ago

      That is so true,,I been though it,, if you put your 100 percent,,and your partner don't,that mean it time to move on...

    16. profile image53
      peter565posted 7 years ago

      If it is just in it for the sex, why not?

    17. Ali Sulehria profile image61
      Ali Sulehriaposted 7 years ago

      One can but it will be really damaging and a negative kind of relationship!!

    18. realtalk247 profile image82
      realtalk247posted 7 years ago

      No. Provided you don't have trust issues to begin with, if that person you are dating makes you feel like they can't be trusted it's time to move on.  Hello Huge Character Flaw.  If they are distrustful or lie about little things they are capable of being deceptive with big things.

    19. chuckandus6 profile image78
      chuckandus6posted 7 years ago

      The only way to survive in a relationship without.trust is to..
      Stop caring or
      gain trust

    20. lolaestrella profile image71
      lolaestrellaposted 7 years ago

      No. I think in order to have a peace of mind, I need to be in a relationship with someone I can trust. Especially when it comes to bringing me happiness, I need to know that I can trust him wherever I go and whatever situation that I'm in. I personally refuse to be in a relationship with someone who is unreliable emotionally - being in love doesn't have to equal to being stupid. You live to be happy, and not being in a misery.

      It's better off being single than being doubtful in your relationship.

    21. MonkeyShine75 profile image61
      MonkeyShine75posted 7 years ago

      Trust seems to be more important than love in a relationship
      Why would anyone want to be in a relationship with someone they don't trust? I wouldn't

    22. M Asif Jameel profile image65
      M Asif Jameelposted 7 years ago

      Off course we  can't have a relationship with  whom we  don't trust but some relations are made by God instead of men and we have to keep these relations though we shouldn't  trust them because they aren't trustworthy.

      1. profile image52
        frumpletonposted 6 years agoin reply to this

        You shouldn't suffer the rest of your life with someone just because you are married if they are deceptive.  God doesn't like evil.

    23. Steven Lindquist profile image60
      Steven Lindquistposted 7 years ago

      First you would have to ask yourself why would you want to have a relationship with someone you don't trust and then ask yourself is it worth it to pursue such such a relationship. Many times the answers will be the same but some times they aren't and it depends on what you qualify as a relationship. Is it merely casual, in which case you may have relationships with those that you don't trust. In the odd chance you want a relationship that is more in depth be prepared to be hurt and let down.

    24. Cerulean Crayon profile image64
      Cerulean Crayonposted 7 years ago

      Only part of a relationship.




      That's my whole answer.

    25. Chriswillman90 profile image94
      Chriswillman90posted 7 years ago

      Unless you want a nightmarish relationship then of course not. Trust is the first thing that should be established in any relationship because it can't work well without it. Without trust you'll always be wondering what the other person is doing at all times of the day, and it can get quite obsessive if not dangerous for some.

      I wouldn't give it much time because your hopeful prospects will be very low if you do.

    26. Pooja Gohil profile image60
      Pooja Gohilposted 7 years ago

      just believe in your heart. if your heart says that the person would not do any thing wrong to you then just follow it . i would like to tell you even i was stuck in such condition. even i was too disturbed but at that time I had confident in my selection and my love. person can commit mistake because after all v are human. and second should be given if u feel the person is genuine.

    27. Emily Sim profile image60
      Emily Simposted 7 years ago

      Trust is relationship reason.If you do not trust people you can't be with him and your relationship can't work,becouse you haven't respect and love from another people.

    28. GizSleep profile image67
      GizSleepposted 7 years ago

      I would say you can have a relationship with them of course, but how functional that relationship is would be another matter. The problem wouldn't be there everyday but it would be there when that person is perhaps going on a night out and your trust issues (whether warranted or not) come to the surface and two things will happen; you'll hate the relationship for making you feel anxious and your partner will resent you for making them feel guilty about going out. Another issue is that, if your partner has cheated in the past and you've moved on, it's likely you'll bring up past indiscretions in an argument which will cause further problems.

    29. Nicole Grizzle profile image81
      Nicole Grizzleposted 7 years ago

      Trust is the foundation of everything! Be it school friendships, work relationships, your parents, your boyfriend, etc. If you cannot trust the other person, the whole relationship falls apart.

    30. AnnaCia profile image81
      AnnaCiaposted 7 years ago

      It is my opinion, that if there are facts and evidences for you not to trust him. then you should walk away.  If, on the other hand, it is a problem that comes from your mind, then you need to work on that.

    31. evancat profile image66
      evancatposted 7 years ago

      To simply answer this question: yes. To delve into what your definition of "relationship" is factors in a new set of ideas. Can you marry someone, grow old with them and live a happy, fulfilling life? This would have be a "no." Relationships in this sense are built on trust. Trust meaning all areas of life. Will they take care of the pets if you have to leave to visit your mother for two days? Will they make sure that they pay the bills on time? Can you trust them to run to the store with your best friend while you're cooking to grab some items before a get together and not have to worry about infidelity? Why spend all of the time and energy worrying when that same energy can be put into loving someone completely and worrying about issues outside of your relationship as they arise? Life is too short to lay down next to someone at night that you don't truly know, because you don't trust them.

    32. Er Sonu Yadav profile image56
      Er Sonu Yadavposted 7 years ago

      if you really love him / her . and want his relationship then turst is important.  because if there is no turst between relationship . Good relationship don't occur. it break one Day.

    33. malikkhuri profile image61
      malikkhuriposted 7 years ago

      I don't think so, trust is the key to successful relationships, what is the point of having a relationship with no trust.

    34. profile image0
      lisasuniquevoiceposted 7 years ago

      ShanteD,
      If you have a relationship with someone you don't trust it will always be strained. You won't be able to just sit and laugh because you can't relax in a situation like that. It's best to cut someone to the curb if you can't trust them.
      Lisa

    35. profile image0
      Diana Abrahamsonposted 7 years ago

      Trust is earned and a two way attitude. Broken trust leaves the heart broken and it takes a long time for the healing and trust to be restored.

      1. profile image52
        Krissy16posted 6 years agoin reply to this

        I'm with my child's father we been together for 3yrs I don't trust him he shows me he only wants me but it's things he do that makes me think otherwise like change his phone code wen I had it want give me his code to laptop change his FB password

    36. walaa salah profile image56
      walaa salahposted 7 years ago

      When trust is denied no love could be earned again. Doubting and questioning each and every move or action by your partner will prevail. no love could possibly exist in such an environment!

    37. profile image0
      Joshtheplumberposted 7 years ago

      If you could read minds you wouldn't trust anybody. So is it possible to have a relationship at all? We've all pulled it off somehow.

    38. profile image57
      Whitney Turnerposted 7 years ago

      I believe you can. I have relationships with people at my job and I don't trust them. We have a very basic "relationship" , just so I can get my work done. So it's possible. But I believe it's not possible to have a very intimate relationship with someone you do now trust. Good question .

      1. realtalk247 profile image82
        realtalk247posted 6 years agoin reply to this

        That's an interesting and true scenario. I guess in basic relationship situations that true but in matters of the heart that is unacceptable. At least in my book it's unacceptable.

    39. lolontka profile image60
      lolontkaposted 7 years ago

      Yes so long as you take their untrustworthiness into account. It may not be a good relationship and you may have to keep certain information to yourself but a relationship is possible. With some difficult people you have to tell them what they want to hear in order to shield yourself.

    40. keishialeelouis profile image61
      keishialeelouisposted 7 years ago

      You could, but it wouldn't be a very good or healthy one.

    41. serenityjmiller profile image75
      serenityjmillerposted 7 years ago

      Sure, you can have a relationship with anyone. In fact, you already do have a relationship... with everyone you interact with. Some are good relationships, some are bad relationships, some are neutral relationships - they're all relationships. The key is to decide what kind of a relationship you want and with whom, then vocalize your hopes and desires for that relationship, then determine whether the other person is willing to work toward a mutually satisfactory relationship with you. The real question might be more like "Why don't you trust this person?" And "What can be done to help you trust this person?" Better yet, "Why do you want a relationship with someone you don't trust?"

    42. everythingzealous profile image61
      everythingzealousposted 7 years ago

      Although most say that you cannot love without trust, it is possible. Maybe you had already trusted and loved that person. And they made a mistake and broke that trust.. so what are we just going to leave every person that breaks our trust and not give them at least one chance to make it better? Especially if you have been with that person for years before that trust was broken. It may take alot of time but it is possible to build up that trust again - and it may not be easy but I strongly believe that things that test relationships keep them strong. If you can make it through the tough times with said person - than your love for them will grow stronger and stronger.

    43. NehaAsh profile image61
      NehaAshposted 7 years ago

      I have not faced this type of opportunity.
      I think, If we have a relationship with someone, then it means that we trust him/her. Can't say that you don't trust. You trust him/her, but a little bit.
      The relationship always starts with trust. Not without trust.
      If you tied a knot forcefully with someone without your wish than at that time you can say that you don't have a trust but still are in relationship. At that time, you should give them to understand him/her.

    44. Payal N Naik profile image61
      Payal N Naikposted 7 years ago

      Trust is the key for any relationship to work. Without trust the relationship can go on say for few days or few months but for a relationship to last forever, trust is the key ingredient. If there is no trust in a relationship, then with time things will always turn bad rather than doing any good to relationship.Trust once broken takes forever to repair. If you don't trust your partner then its better on your part to move on, because with time lack of trust with start creating a gap between two people in relationship and take away the love forever.

    45. Dakk profile image90
      Dakkposted 7 years ago

      Yes, but not a healthy one. Without trust, the relationship will degerate in the long run, and become ever more painful untill it becomes unbearable. Either the couple learns to develop trust in eachother, or it'll keep degenerating into ever more painful situations.

    46. profile image52
      srijithrposted 7 years ago

      99% of all relationships in this world are based on the foundation of trust. when the couple distrust each other, they are bound to suspect each and every activity of the other person which may cause the relationship to become unstable.

    47. Gaurav Oberoi profile image76
      Gaurav Oberoiposted 7 years ago

      The answer is not easy but very simple. NO. It will never ever work and the relationship will end up in flames. Distance adds to the misery. Long distance relationships go through this problem more often than not. The only way out is to sit with the partner and discuss it up-to the point of a proper closure. And before doing that it is pertinent to establish some ground rules, especially no yelling or 'flying objects.'

    48. ogochukwu1 profile image40
      ogochukwu1posted 7 years ago

      Every relationship is built on two things 1. Love 2. Trust

     
    working

    This website uses cookies

    As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, hubpages.com uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

    For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at: https://corp.maven.io/privacy-policy

    Show Details
    Necessary
    HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
    LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
    Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
    AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
    Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
    CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the googleapis.com or gstatic.com domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
    Features
    Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
    Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
    Marketing
    Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
    Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
    Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
    Statistics
    Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
    ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)
    ClickscoThis is a data management platform studying reader behavior (Privacy Policy)