To Spank or not to Spank that is the question?
Ok, here's a sensitive topic I know. However, as someone who has endured several memorable spankings i.e belts, extension chords, and any other hard, sturdy pain inducing make-shift whip...yes Therapy is on the "to do list", don't judge me...
I often ask myself, is it ok to spank. I do not have kids of my own yet and can't imagine what my child would have to do for me to consider spanking them, so I ask..... To Spank, or Not?
94- Misha
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I would spank you anytime. Bare hand of course.
That said, I do spank my kids when they get completely out of hand, and trust me - they do.
- Redneckman
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Yup spank your ass until the redhand showed
95- cosette
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dejajolie wrote:
Ok, here's a sensitive topic I know. However, as someone who has endured several memorable spankings i.e belts, extension chords, and any other hard, sturdy pain inducing make-shift whip...yes Therapy is on the "to do list", don't judge me...
I often ask myself, is it ok to spank. I do not have kids of my own yet and can't imagine what my child would have to do for me to consider spanking them, so I ask..... To Spank, or Not?
no of course not.
Misha wrote:
I would spank you anytime. Bare hand of course.
That said, I do spank my kids when they get completely out of hand, and trust me - they do.lol that's a completely different kind
Ok but there's a little spank on the bum....and there's the spanking where Division of Youth and Family Services is called because there are bruises and welts all over the arms and legs.....I experienced the latter.....Where does one draw the line?
94- jiberish
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There is a fine line between abuse and a spanking. Most spoiled kids have never been spanked and that's a shame. It only takes one spanking to let a child know who's the parent. I believe in spare the rod spoil the child, but only in the form of a few taps on the hands or butt.
73- sneakorocksolid
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I felt at one point when my son was 5 or 6 that I needed to get his attention. We had alittle wood ruler and I gave him three swats. He cried but I cried worse because I remembered the beatings I got. The fear verging on terror when it came to my Dad and I couldn't do it again. Now I did use the fact that I had to my advantage. My son and I are really close and it would break his heart if he thought I was mad at him. So, from that point on I would bring him nose to nose with me and say, "Do we need to go for a walk!" That meant big trouble to him and thank God he always backed off! He was a good kid so I hardly ever had to say anything.
- 94
- Misha
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dejajolie wrote:
Misha wrote:
I would spank you anytime. Bare hand of course.
That said, I do spank my kids when they get completely out of hand, and trust me - they do.lol that's a completely different kind
Ok but there's a little spank on the bum....and there's the spanking where Division of Youth and Family Services is called because there are bruises and welts all over the arms and legs.....I experienced the latter.....Where does one draw the line?I feel for you then.
No, I don't think it is an acceptable practice. When you occasionally get mad at your child and slap their bum out of being helpless to correct their behavior with other methods - it is materially different from getting methodically violent on them.... - 73
- sneakorocksolid
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jiberish wrote:
There is a fine line between abuse and a spanking. Most spoiled kids have never been spanked and that's a shame. It only takes one spanking to let a child know who's the parent. I believe in spare the rod spoil the child, but only in the form of a few taps on the hands or butt.
You are right again! I was writing that same thing about our house!
- 95
- cosette
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dejajolie wrote:
Misha wrote:
I would spank you anytime. Bare hand of course.
That said, I do spank my kids when they get completely out of hand, and trust me - they do.lol that's a completely different kind
Ok but there's a little spank on the bum....and there's the spanking where Division of Youth and Family Services is called because there are bruises and welts all over the arms and legs.....I experienced the latter.....Where does one draw the line?i never "spanked" my son once. ever. even when children are very small, you can teach them acceptable behavior and provide proper discipline without raising your hand to them. my son is not spoiled and he never was. he is and always has been unselfish, kind and compassionate. he also was never bullied by anyone, nor did he ever hit anyone else.
"spank" is a euphemism.
if "spanking" is so ok, why is it not ok for daycare personnel to strike your child? they get them to behave without hititng them, so why can't parents?
it's interesting that this subject was brought up. just the other day I was admiring my hands and then as I was looking I thought how happy I was that these hands...my hands...have never imparted pain or fear to my child. 
92- Colebabie
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Only in bed.
- 94
- Misha
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cosette wrote:
dejajolie wrote:
Misha wrote:
I would spank you anytime. Bare hand of course.
That said, I do spank my kids when they get completely out of hand, and trust me - they do.lol that's a completely different kind
Ok but there's a little spank on the bum....and there's the spanking where Division of Youth and Family Services is called because there are bruises and welts all over the arms and legs.....I experienced the latter.....Where does one draw the line?i never "spanked" my son once. ever. even when children are very small, you can teach them acceptable behavior and provide proper discipline without raising your hand to them. my son is not spoiled and he never was. he is and always has been unselfish, kind and compassionate. he also was never bullied by anyone, nor did he ever hit anyone else.
"spank" is a euphemism.
if "spanking" is so ok, why is it not ok for daycare personnel to strike your child? they get them to behave without hititng them, so why can't parents?
it's interesting that this subject was brought up. just the other day I was admiring my hands and then as I was looking I thought how happy I was that these hands...my hands...have never imparted pain or fear to my child.You are better then me Cosette. Or you just got lucky. May be both though.
sneakorocksolid wrote:
I felt at one point when my son was 5 or 6 that I needed to get his attention. We had alittle wood ruler and I gave him three swats. He cried but I cried worse because I remembered the beatings I got. The fear verging on terror when it came to my Dad and I couldn't do it again. Now I did use the fact that I had to my advantage. My son and I are really close and it would break his heart if he thought I was mad at him. So, from that point on I would bring him nose to nose with me and say, "Do we need to go for a walk!" That meant big trouble to him and thank God he always backed off! He was a good kid so I hardly ever had to say anything.
Sounds like a good parenting skill.....All I really NEEDED (although I got more) was "the look" and I knew it was time to get it together...most kids will straighten up because the thought of disappointing their parents puts them in check. I hate to witness parents spank out of anger....that's when it's easy to get out of control.
Here;
Foolishness is bound in the heart of a child; but the rod
of correction shall drive it far from him."
Proverbs 22:15
The rod and reproof give wisdom: but a child left to
himself bringeth his mother to shame."
Proverbs 29:15
Train up a child in the way that he should go and when he is old he will not depart from it. Prov 22:6
Chasten thy son while there is hope, and let not thy soul
spare for his crying."
Proverbs 19:18I grew up in a culture where my parents said:"If you cannot hear, you must feel." I believe in spanking as a last resort. The child who has been told repeatedly about a behaviour has to learn how to listen. One time I was caring for a friend's children.One of them was stubborn, disregarded my instructions and wanted to have her own way. She touched a momento and broke it.Spanking her did not restore the broken item but at least she learnt how to spell spank before she went to Preschool. She likes surprise better than s-p-a-n-k now.
cosette wrote:
dejajolie wrote:
Misha wrote:
I would spank you anytime. Bare hand of course.
That said, I do spank my kids when they get completely out of hand, and trust me - they do.lol that's a completely different kind
Ok but there's a little spank on the bum....and there's the spanking where Division of Youth and Family Services is called because there are bruises and welts all over the arms and legs.....I experienced the latter.....Where does one draw the line?i never "spanked" my son once. ever. even when children are very small, you can teach them acceptable behavior and provide proper discipline without raising your hand to them. my son is not spoiled and he never was. he is and always has been unselfish, kind and compassionate. he also was never bullied by anyone, nor did he ever hit anyone else.
"spank" is a euphemism.
if "spanking" is so ok, why is it not ok for daycare personnel to strike your child? they get them to behave without hititng them, so why can't parents?
it's interesting that this subject was brought up. just the other day I was admiring my hands and then as I was looking I thought how happy I was that these hands...my hands...have never imparted pain or fear to my child.I have heard that it teaches kids that violence is ok.... and thus you have pre-schoolers hitting one another when they don't get their way...I am trying to understand both sides. I know my grandmother was doing what she was taught, repeating how she was raised in the South but she was out of control most of the time.
blbhhdcn wrote:
Here;
Foolishness is bound in the heart of a child; but the rod
of correction shall drive it far from him."
Proverbs 22:15
The rod and reproof give wisdom: but a child left to
himself bringeth his mother to shame."
Proverbs 29:15
Train up a child in the way that he should go and when he is old he will not depart from it. Prov 22:6
Chasten thy son while there is hope, and let not thy soul
spare for his crying."
Proverbs 19:18This is the problem I have with taking scripture literally, some things are parables... not sure "the rod" means a belt or switch although most people (my grandmother) thought it did. This however is a topic for another forum...IMO
- 95
- cosette
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Misha wrote:
cosette wrote:
dejajolie wrote:
lol that's a completely different kind
Ok but there's a little spank on the bum....and there's the spanking where Division of Youth and Family Services is called because there are bruises and welts all over the arms and legs.....I experienced the latter.....Where does one draw the line?i never "spanked" my son once. ever. even when children are very small, you can teach them acceptable behavior and provide proper discipline without raising your hand to them. my son is not spoiled and he never was. he is and always has been unselfish, kind and compassionate. he also was never bullied by anyone, nor did he ever hit anyone else.
"spank" is a euphemism.
if "spanking" is so ok, why is it not ok for daycare personnel to strike your child? they get them to behave without hititng them, so why can't parents?
it's interesting that this subject was brought up. just the other day I was admiring my hands and then as I was looking I thought how happy I was that these hands...my hands...have never imparted pain or fear to my child.You are better then me Cosette. Or you just got lucky. May be both though.
no, not better. just a different philosophy. and you're right, i did get lucky.
Hands - Jewel
dejajolie, i too was hit by my parents....my dad only occasionally, with his belt...my mom all the time just so she could vent...this took place with anything handy, although her tool of choice was an oleander branch with the leaves pulled off. it always cheesed me off that this sort of behavior was sanctioned by the bible, but i am getting off-track here.
i knew what it felt like to be hit and made afraid by someone who was supposed to protect you, and i promised i would never do that to my own children when i had them.
well, this would make an excellent hub.
as for me i have to go do some research for one of my own hubs. have a great night you guys. 
98- Dame Scribe
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I never spanked my kids either
I didn't like it as a kid n learned to use having my kids write lines (5, 10, 25, 50 
), time out, loss of priviliges and apologize for bad behavior. Today, they are spoiled, playful and mischievous yes but have respect for others who give same to them.
96- Catherine R
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You can discipline a child perfectly well without hitting them. I have three very well behaved kids and I don't need to spank them. A smack with the hand in the heat of the moment is totally different from beating the child with other objects - in a premeditated way. By doing this I think you are using your power over the child in an inexcusable way and also giving them the message that violence is OK.
