I have lost my purpose in life.

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  1. paradigmsearch profile image60
    paradigmsearchposted 8 years ago

    Nothing interests me anymore. It's all just marking time and waiting to die. That sucks and is no way to live. Contributing to society via my scribblings on HubPages used to be my interest, but that seems to have disappeared. Simultaneously contributing to society and having fun while doing it truly is the road to happiness in life. I am looking for guidance. Hopefully, some serendipitous post will come along. There is still a spark of good in Ringo...

    1. indiabbie profile image60
      indiabbieposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      I'm sorry you feel this way.  Love and light to you, fellow blogger.  ♡

    2. Shades-of-truth profile image85
      Shades-of-truthposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      Good - that means you have time on your hands. We need the carpets cleaned in our jewelry store, my youngest son and his wife could use some help with their two little ones, as his wife ended up in the hospital with an infection after an unwanted C-section, my oldest son and his wife could use some help on their country property where they live with their seven children, the lanai needs to be cleaned at my home, we need to have some ceiling tiles replaced, and inventory done.

      That run-on sentence is simply the tip of the iceberg of chores that we could use help doing, and we are hard pressed to find someone without purpose, who would like to contribute.

      Please purchase your own ticket to come, as we could all use additional financial help. Will await your prompt arrival!

      1. paradigmsearch profile image60
        paradigmsearchposted 8 years agoin reply to this

        I'll call your poverty and raise you food stamps. lol

        But this thread isn't about that. Between medical and poverty, more people have serious problems than not. It's a given.

        This thread is about contributing to society and finding what happiness one can in the process.

        1. Shades-of-truth profile image85
          Shades-of-truthposted 8 years agoin reply to this

          Ah, my dear....if you came to help us, you would be contributing to society, and you would definitely be happy. We are a cheerful bunch!

      2. Michael-Milec profile image59
        Michael-Milecposted 8 years agoin reply to this

        Isn't this a great idea?

    3. John MacNab profile image81
      John MacNabposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      I had a heart attack on Saturday 10th Jan 2015.    There I was in hospital, struggling for the next breath which could be my last breath.   The Doctor asked me....."If it appears that you are having your last breath, do you want us to recuperate you?".............................That's when you can decide whether you want to live or die.

      1. paradigmsearch profile image60
        paradigmsearchposted 8 years agoin reply to this

        I'm glad you apparently live in Canada. If you lived in the US, you might have changed your mind when you started getting the fan mail from the ambulance service, hospital, and various doctors. lol

        1. mireland19 profile image90
          mireland19posted 8 years agoin reply to this


      2. makingamark profile image67
        makingamarkposted 8 years agoin reply to this

        Wow - that's some wake-up call!

        How are you doing now John? Are you getting some decent help re. whatever happens next. I wish you and your heart well in the future.

        (I confess I'm dumbfounded at the level of self-absorption of some of the people commenting in this thread!)

    4. Say Yes To Life profile image80
      Say Yes To Lifeposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      I've got LOADS of projects, if you're interested!  You can 1) help me market some sex books I've recently written, or 2) ghost write my stories, which I don't have time to write myself. LOL!

      1. paradigmsearch profile image60
        paradigmsearchposted 8 years agoin reply to this

        Maybe you can market my hub about LIFEbig_smile

        To all,

        A lot of very good advice has shown up on this thread. It has perked me up. Thanks. One way or the other, I will find something.

        1. PegCole17 profile image96
          PegCole17posted 8 years agoin reply to this

          "A lot of very good advice has shown up on this thread. It has perked me up. Thanks. One way or the other, I will find something."

          Paradigmsearch, I'm sorry that you're feeling so troubled, truly sorry and wish I could say anything to make you feel better now. It sounds like you've been through a rough patch physically, financially or mentally or all of the above. Take a moment to appreciate the things you've experienced in life and learned during your life, remember the humor you once felt, consider the lives you've affected positively through your writing and sharing of yourself online. These moments of introspection either reassure us or make us want to change.
          You are a valuable human being. You have so much left to do here - not necessarily here on this site - but here on this earth. You have so much left to give.
          I wish I had the answer you're seeking about the true purpose in our lives. We all go through spells of disappointment in others or in ourselves. There was a time when I felt as you do now, a time when I acted on my darkest thoughts. How glad I am now that I was not successful. I started life over in a new place with a new identity, with a break from the past that had haunted my every living moment.
          Please don't let this temporary sadness or lack of luster for life overwhelm your keen and bright spirit. You have many people who care for you, not knowing your real name, or where you find yourself at the moment. You are a fellow human being and are loved by me and so many others.

    5. Adrianna Rose profile image60
      Adrianna Roseposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      Honestly, my commentary will not be helpful. Everything I've had in my mind to respond to your suffering has already been expressed better than I could have said it.

      I will only say this: While seriously contemplating suicide, I kept everything bottled within me, suffocating in my own misery, and I think it's really admirable of you to present your very personal stance on life to a community of people. I also am amazed at the support and help given in response.

      I agree with what you think about being happy and am sure that there is much more to be said. Please continue impacting society because I'm sure you'll leave ripples that will do good for others.

    6. TIMETRAVELER2 profile image88
      TIMETRAVELER2posted 8 years agoin reply to this

      If you want to do something that will really make you feel good, try these suggestions:

      Go down to the local maternity ward and volunteer to hold and calm new infants who suffer because their mothers smoked crack cocaine during pregnancy.

      Volunteer to play with the dogs at your local pound who so sorely need love and attention.

      Visit an elderly neighbor who lives alone and would give anything to have someone to talk to.

      Lie on a grassy field on a starry night and look up.  Contemplate the vastness of the universe and what a small speck you are in comparison to all of it.

      Finally...get some sleep.  You sound like you simply are exhausted.

      1. janshares profile image95
        jansharesposted 8 years agoin reply to this

        Great suggestions.

    7. peachpurple profile image81
      peachpurpleposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      oh please, don't think of the negative thoughts. Are you single or married? If you are married; maybe try talking to your best friends about your problems, if you are single, try talking to your parents or siblings. How about try putting in your questions here and let us help or write a hub about your questions. I want to help you to sort out.

    8. Maina Ndungu profile image92
      Maina Ndunguposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      You don't have to lose hope yet. I've gone through what you just described several times in my life. At one point, I had absolutely nothing, not even a good pair of slippers. I still came out of the despair.
      To quote Joel Osteen; When you think there's no way out, remember that God always has a way. Try to open your eyes and ask help from a friend.

    9. Harishprasad profile image73
      Harishprasadposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      This is just a temporary phase of life and will go away, and soon you will have another phase, a beautiful and cheerful phase ! Just wait and watch, my friend, the whole existence is in motion and gets changed every moment.

    10. Writer Fox profile image28
      Writer Foxposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      Instead of looking for a purpose to your life, try finding a purpose for this day.

      The Hemet Public Library needs a volunteer Computer Docent to "assist customers in getting onto the Internet, using Microsoft Office and printing."  Please help out there for a few hours today: http://www.hemetpubliclibrary.org/
      (Then you can teach them how to write Hubs!)

      Tomorrow, the Adult Literacy Services at the library needs "caring, patient volunteers to tutor adults in basic reading, writing, and spelling skills":

      The rest of the week, you can hang out here:

      Meeting new people can open many new doors, one door at a time, one day at a time.


    11. colorfulone profile image80
      colorfuloneposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      I just read a post on Facebook that said, "There are people who would like to have your bad days." 

      I really like that.

    12. seashell2 profile image60
      seashell2posted 8 years agoin reply to this

      If you can find it in yourself to volunteer somewhere in your community, a shelter or food bank, helping others and seeing others in need can encourage you. Even when you don't feel like it, it can bring rewards! Perhaps you'll make a new friend there! Keep your chin up!

    13. Billie Kelpin profile image84
      Billie Kelpinposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      Paradigmsearch,  So, you STOLE my question! smile  I was going to post a very similar question last week because I was feeling the exact same way.  I could go into all the reasons, but it doesn't matter.  What does matter is what got me out of it.  My husband really wasn't understanding the desperation for an answer that I was seeking.  I therefore texted my dear friends, a couple in our RV park, telling them I felt lost, and  they immediately invited me over.  Did that give me an answer?  Not exactly, but their attentive listening and the discussion just brought me to a different place.  The next day I woke up with the song "Carry On," running through my head.  "When you're lost and alone and you're sinking like a stone, carry on."   https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q7yCLn-O-Y0
      When I mentioned this to my friends hoping it would make them feel gratified that this song was comforting me the morning after their kind listening, they were puzzled because it seemed odd that something "so depressing" should be comforting.  But the refrain, "carry on" over and over again was really a great help. 
      However, was I cured?  Not quite.  Still in emotional pain, I kept pressing my husband while trying to explain the depth of desperation and loss of meaning I felt.  (When a person feels they have lost all purpose, they have to struggle to find it.  You can't self-actualize until your basic needs are fulfilled and feeling "not desparate,"  is a pretty basic need.)
      FINALLY, after I kept pressing my husband and continued to tell my him I didn't know in which direction to turn, he started talking to me in VERY PRACTICAL terms about my writing. He reminded me of all the projects I wanted to do - get my little dog blog made into an ebook, do more essays on my mobile app, etc. etc.  He reiterated that my writing was informative and that had moved him often and again, mentioned what he thought I should focus on next.  THAT is what REALLY, REALLY helped...
      SO, here's what I'm going to say to you.  Your hubs are important. They contain a wide range of information that people NEED.  And they appeal to various audiences because apparently YOU have a wide range of interests.  There are technical hubs that I see students needing and "life" hubs, etc.  Your blog has information about divorce, etc.   Focus on that plan that you have somewhere floating in the ethers. Perhaps you were thinking about putting like topics together and creating an ebook!  All of your conversion hubs could be put into one ebook or app!  Think of some clever title.  Your astrology hubs have a unique angle - travel according to your sign.  Interesting - a whole new book.  Maybe you could make that into an app with ibuildapp or an ebook.
      No matter what you do, "Carry on -un-un, Carry on".   All of suggestions here are great.  We know that getting out of ourselves help us, HOWEVER, until we can pull ourselves out of the emotional survival mode, we can't self-actualize. All good wishes and just remember to keep on keeping on.  Cheers, Billie

    14. Odhiambo Ouma Sr profile image56
      Odhiambo Ouma Srposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      So sad you feel this way, my advice is that you should look for that activity which will bring smiles to your face. If its watching cartoons then go for it. The more you smile, the more you will begin to admire this thing called life

  2. clivewilliams profile image74
    clivewilliamsposted 8 years ago

    Contributing to society comes in many ways my friend. You have done your little to contribute to internet society and it is most welcome. Take a break and get some good meditation. Seek a little consciousness along with righteousness, not religion. Go sit in a park, visit a children's home. Visit the KKK, read the newspaper. There are so many things lacking in the world and millions of ways we can make small but very meaningful contributions, either directly or indirectly. Go help plant a tree, join a "Green" group and find meaningful ways to help preserve the earth.
    The World is a vast place, and is always lacking good people to contribute, love, knowledge, wisdom and a whole host of other stuff.

    1. paradigmsearch profile image60
      paradigmsearchposted 8 years agoin reply to this


    2. janshares profile image95
      jansharesposted 8 years agoin reply to this


  3. Shelly Nun-Chucks profile image70
    Shelly Nun-Chucksposted 8 years ago

    so you think there is nothing you can contribute and your waiting to die?

    A few years ago I was going to end my life.  I was going to go to a drawer in the kitchen, grab
    a knife and just end it.

    But a silver lining when I called someone and long story short at my darkest time, when no one was fully in support of my dreams, one person told me they can happen as long as you work for it.

    The problem of today, is it is a "me" world.

    Guess what I have thought the same thing.

    I don't have much of anything, I work a full time job and pay my own rent. No guy is there to pay for me, I am not on any form of government assistance and I go without if I don't have the money.

    I do not have a car so here in Maine, it is a little difficult to get around.


    The fact that I have two legs and fully capable of working my way to success in my own way doing things my own way.

    Yes, some of us have thought the same way, but learning to flip that feeling into something that will make it worth while your here.

    Best wishes.

    1. paradigmsearch profile image60
      paradigmsearchposted 8 years agoin reply to this


      Agreed. Yep, I'm just looking for something to throw my heart and soul into. smile

      1. Pamela Hatheway profile image56
        Pamela Hathewayposted 8 years agoin reply to this

        Have you seen a doctor?

        1. paradigmsearch profile image60
          paradigmsearchposted 8 years agoin reply to this

          Don't get me started on the corrupt and incompetent US medical profession. As far as I"m concerned, literally over half of them belong in prison. Come to think of it, joining one of the many organizations that are dedicated to catching these people would be a worthwhile purpose in life. But I'd rather find something more cheerful than that to do. I'd rather go on the helping good people route than the catching the bad people route.

          1. Barbara Kay profile image74
            Barbara Kayposted 8 years agoin reply to this

            I think it is time you started your own website or blog. There aren't the ups and downs like there are here. Keep your Hubpages account and just write when you feel like it here.

            Have your site or blog focus on something that will help people. That way you will feel like you are contributing to society. Maybe just taking a break would help too. Hopefully my suggestion will make you feel excited about life again and give you a purpose.

            Otherwise, take a walk through your town. Every person you come into contact with, is there for a reason. Just a smile from you might make someone's day brighter. You might be the only person to smile or say hello to an elderly or lonely person their entire day.  It will make you feel better. I hope these ideas might help.

            1. Barbara Kay profile image74
              Barbara Kayposted 8 years agoin reply to this

              Oh, and be sure to let me know about your new blog or website if you start one. You can email me.

              1. paradigmsearch profile image60
                paradigmsearchposted 8 years agoin reply to this

                My current website listed on my profile page seems to have already drifted into that. big_smile

            2. paradigmsearch profile image60
              paradigmsearchposted 8 years agoin reply to this


              1. Barbara Kay profile image74
                Barbara Kayposted 8 years agoin reply to this

                I had a look at your blog. I am going to take your advice about macular degeneration. My sister has it and I have been worried since it runs in our family. Your blog is helpful! I like it.

                1. Barbara Kay profile image74
                  Barbara Kayposted 8 years agoin reply to this

                  I tried to click on follow and it took me too a html page. That feature must not be working on Blogger.

  4. Silva Hayes profile image80
    Silva Hayesposted 8 years ago

    Where do you live?

  5. ChristinS profile image39
    ChristinSposted 8 years ago

    Boredom often mimics the symptoms of depression.  It sounds to me like you need something new to challenge you.  Consider taking a class? maybe volunteering in your community (or even online) There are organizations that are devoted to online volunteers - so you can feel you are involved and helping those who need you.  Here's a good place to start but Google can produce many more results. http://www.idealist.org/info/Volunteer/Online

    If it's truly feeling like you need a purpose - volunteer.  If you are bored and need to challenge the mind to kick your muse in the hiney - take a class.  There are often non-credit classes at local community colleges that are pretty affordable.  My mother and I took a couple of them before just for some bonding time. Usually only a few sessions or whatever, but you could find something that would pique your interest I'm sure.

    When I'm feeling blue or losing sight of the bigger picture I make a list of all I have that is meaningful, that I am grateful for.  It can be the simplest of things like the smell of coffee brewing in the morning. 

    It's almost all mental and taking control of our thoughts/emotions by doing something new and constructive.  I've battled depression in the past and still have the periodic bout sneak up on me - especially in the winter.  When you can, enjoy sunlight even if it's chilly outside to get your inner clock working and to get some Vitamin D the old fashion way.  D deficiency has been shown in studies to worsen depression which makes a lot of sense as to why so many suffer from it in the winter months. 

    Hopefully something here helps.  If nothing else - hang in there.  These things usually pass.

    1. paradigmsearch profile image60
      paradigmsearchposted 8 years agoin reply to this


  6. ixwa profile image79
    ixwaposted 8 years ago

    Go Do/Write Up, Or Work-up on Your name - "Paradigm Search"...

    1. Gloriousconfusion profile image92
      Gloriousconfusionposted 8 years ago

      When my son felt like you, he decided to do voluntary work in the Philippines, in Tacloban, which was hit by hurricane Haelan at the end of 2013 and almost totally devastated. 

      He went there for six weeks as a construction worker, using all his savings, and working for nothing, teaching people how to construct modest homes and putting roofs over various decimated properties and buying tools and electric generators for people.  They built the new properties on a hillside, so that they were less likely to get washed away by fresh storms.  He made many friends, heard many terrible stories of loss, about people who saw their family and homes washed away into the sea and he said their fighting spirit was remarkable. He felt privileged to be able to use his skills to help so many people, and said that it helped him to realize what are the important things in life.

      He made many contacts and when he came home, he paid for a child to attend school for a year there.  Next week he is returning, having worked overtime all year to save up enough money.  He has been offered free accommodation for as long as he wants by a grateful family for whom he built a roof last year. And this time he is bringing a friend who will work with him. They will buy materials, build, teach construction skills, and pay for more children to attend school.

      It's given him a new lease of life and our family are all so proud of him and the way he's turned his life around.


      1. paradigmsearch profile image60
        paradigmsearchposted 8 years agoin reply to this


        1. Jane Ire profile image59
          Jane Ireposted 8 years agoin reply to this

          It's really true. If you refocus instead of thinking only about how sad you are, and start noticing other people and trying to do what you can to improve their lives, then you start to feel like you're making a difference. In turn that will help you feel better and really feel the happiness you've shared with them. That's how I feel anyway. smile

        2. aesta1 profile image94
          aesta1posted 8 years agoin reply to this

          Gloriousconfusion, this is really fantastic. I have read many stories of people helping in Tacloban but your son's story is special. I wish you write a hub on this so I can share it with my friends overt there.

        3. colorfulone profile image80
          colorfuloneposted 8 years agoin reply to this


      2. janderson99 profile image56
        janderson99posted 8 years ago

        Here's some suggestions:
        => Research topics you are interested in and write entertaining innovative articles (try my RSS inspiration tool www.wotisnew.com)
        => Research topics that will genuinely interest and help people and write new innovative articles that provoke debate
        => Travel
        => Join local service groups such as Lions and Rotary
        => Join a local club
        => Try new interests - prospecting, write a book, learn C+ programming etc.
        => Set yourself new challenges i.e. write one hub a day, renovate the house, get fit, etc. Nothing like a challenge to keep you focused. Most writers have to set challenges and work to strict routines and schedules
        => Become a volunteer for an environmental group or offer to provide tutoring for free

        1. paradigmsearch profile image60
          paradigmsearchposted 8 years agoin reply to this


          1. Castlepaloma profile image75
            Castlepalomaposted 8 years agoin reply to this


            Its sounds like you have a few friends that care on Hubpages and you like some of their ideas on this thread.

            What did you want to be as a child?
            Have you ever made a dream list?
            Is there anybody in your pass, you keep having negative thoughts about even way back into your childhood

          2. Castlepaloma profile image75
            Castlepalomaposted 8 years agoin reply to this

            Gee, with all this attention paradigmsearch getting he ought to be feeling better.

      3. rebekahELLE profile image85
        rebekahELLEposted 8 years ago

          If you're serious, I suggest staying offline for a while and take time to get focused.  More life is wasted spending time online.  Get out into the community.  None of us really know your situation, so it's difficult to give specific guidance, but getting out with good people for good causes is a great place to start.  There are many volunteer groups that help give meaning and purpose to peoples lives.  Even getting out is better than sitting around thinking about how meaningless your life seems to be.  This is it, don't waste it.  I'm certain that you could find hubs from any of us that have responded here that could possibly have that serendipitous message you're looking for. 
        Sometimes you just have to tell yourself no, and not go there in your head.

        1. Jane Ire profile image59
          Jane Ireposted 8 years ago

          I think a lot of people feel what you're feeling everyday. Scratch that, I don't think i know. I have. If you lost your purpose, what did you feel like it was in the first place? I'd love to talk with you about it.

        2. Silva Hayes profile image80
          Silva Hayesposted 8 years ago

          I asked earlier where you lived -- sometimes the weather bums me out.  I'm an artist, so when it's freezing cold and overcast outside, you would think it would be a good time to create; however, it affects me in a negative way and I suffer creative block.  Also, I found out a couple of years ago that I had an extreme Vitamin D deficiency and when I started taking supplements, my attitude and energy improved dramatically, so you might try taking Vitamin D and see if you feel differently.   

          If I lived alone, there are many activities I would pursue that involve helping others, both humans and animals.  However, I have to consider my husband and extended family and all their needs and wants, so right now I limit myself to creating art and doing everything I can for my granddaughters, helping make their lives a little easier.  Long story which I won't go into. 

          When there is a collaborative effort for a public mosaic art installation, I always contribute a piece when asked and that makes me feel like I'm doing something positive.  If I lived alone, I would foster animals for sure, and I would also love to foster young children if I would not be considered too old!  When I hear stories about people who help those in need by building and repairing living quarters, providing running water, etc., it always makes me smile.  I love to hear about people who have acquired a skill and then help less fortunate people and animals by applying that skill. 

          Good luck and I hope things improve for you.  I'm on my way to pick up the grandchildren from the bus stop and then on to the convenience store to buy a Mega Million ticket - it's $247 million tonight!

        3. DzyMsLizzy profile image89
          DzyMsLizzyposted 8 years ago

          Interesting; I have felt that exact same thing of late, and expressed it in almost those exact same words.  But please don't even think of harming yourself.  My husband and I have a strong philosophy of "suicide is a permanent solution for a temporary problem." 

          I muddle along, day by day, doing the best I can.  I try to find victory in small steps, and hope that by "paying it forward," in small ways, I can help.  I can't afford financial contributions to help folks, but I try to do the small things, like picking up something someone has dropped, or today, I pulled up beside a car, honked at them, and let them know their gas cap was swinging free on the side of their car.

          It's not much, but it is sometimes the small things that mean the most.

          My own health is pretty good; my husband's is not, and I have been thrust into the role of caretaker and medicine dispensary, for which I was never trained.  It is stressful, so I try to follow the advice similar to what I've seen others post here, along the lines of getting out, and just getting a change of scene from the four walls.

          Your writing here is worthwhile, and enjoyed by many, yours truly included.  As well, you are knowledgeable about the site, about SEO, and often give of your experience, offering advice and instruction to those of us who suck at that skill.  That, in and of itself is a valuable service, making you a useful person. 
          Chin up, my friend.  "This too, shall pass."

          1. Say Yes To Life profile image80
            Say Yes To Lifeposted 8 years agoin reply to this

            Kudos to you, DzyMsLzzy!  I'm a caregiver, but only on a few occasions have I had clients I formerly knew.  It must be hard, seeing a loved one in such a condition.  No wonder you're depressed!
            I personally greatly appreciate when someone tells me my gas cap is off.  Thank you!

        4. RanaKm profile image38
          RanaKmposted 8 years ago

          I don't know who you are or what you do but your post has just made me feel something inside.
          We all get similar feelings sometimes and well, there's nothing we can do about them.
          I want you to remember this though:
          When a door closes another one opens.
          We might think that the previous door which have closed would be good for us, yes it would be good but the other door which would open might be just better.
          Nothing interests me as well and I'm so lost these days - actually these months but I'm still hanging in the hope of getting good after this.
          Please stay strong no matter what and show yourself that you're stronger from that, don't let your feelings control you, you're the one who should be controlling your feelings.

        5. Marcy Goodfleisch profile image89
          Marcy Goodfleischposted 8 years ago

          Read The Meaning of Life, by Viktor Frankl - he spent years in a Concentration Camp and observed (then later wrote about) what made some people 'keep going' in the midst of that environment.  It's truly inspirational, and I don't mean that it sells religion - it is about keeping on keeping on.

          1. aesta1 profile image94
            aesta1posted 8 years agoin reply to this

            This is one of my all time favourites. I just think of this when I feel low.

        6. profile image0
          robertzimmerman2posted 8 years ago

          I recommend going to a local music store and purchasing an inexpensive Ukulele. It will become your friend, trust me.

        7. Kathryn L Hill profile image76
          Kathryn L Hillposted 8 years ago

          Well, I say, enjoy doing nothing and feeling depressed. Its a lull and it feels good. Go with it.
          I know you like your bouts of depression. A (writing) high always follows
          of it own accord...

          sad + sad = smile

          1. profile image0
            jonnycomelatelyposted 8 years agoin reply to this


            I little trick I have found works sometimes (not always, that would be a lie).

            I have found that when I am feeling low, lonely, sad, lacking hope and energy, no End-of-the Tunnel in sight, there is a sort of triangle that gives me a clue.

            The three sides to the triangle are:  Tired

            If I am Tired, I lack the energy to prepare and eat a meal.
            If I am  Lonely, there is no incentive to prepare a meal.
            If I am  Hungry,  I'm too tired to prepare it.   

            See?  That triangle.  So, if I can break the triangle things can turn out much for the better.   

            Break one of those factors, deal with it, and I pave the way to resolve the situation.... I can go get some sleep, even if it's only half an hour.   Then the energy will be there to get me out for a meal.   My brain will have revived sufficiently for me to think about calling someone.   If not that, there is still a better chance I will have a smile for a stranger I meet on the street or in the cafe.

            My normal brain says, I need food.  My food is blood glucose.  I need some sleep.   I need company.  Without any one of these three it's likely I will feel depressed.

            1. Sue Adams profile image95
              Sue Adamsposted 8 years agoin reply to this

              I would ad a fourth element to the vicious circle of deep depression:
              If I feel uncomfortable in my body, even when having had enough sleep, it's a struggle to even get up to prepare that meal.

              A body that is unaware of chronic physical discomfort relies on negative thinking to try and justify a miserable feeling.

              Play some music, get up and dance!

        8. tirelesstraveler profile image60
          tirelesstravelerposted 8 years ago

          Dear Search, As my Irish grandmother would say," You need a good dose of castor oil."  It will give you a good cleansing from what ails you and correct just about anything causing a backup smile Lots of hugs 
          Perrya has an interesting hub on the cuddling business. Outrageous, but a better alternative than socialized medicine.
          Now I have to go looking for a place to sleep. The hot water bag leaked all over our bed and it's too late to dry the pad and remake the bed. My husband went to sleep on the floor and I don't want to wake him.trying to make the bed.  Looks like a sleeping bag will do just nicely.

          I for one would miss you if you disappeared from our midst.  You have always been an inspiration to me.

        9. Sue Adams profile image95
          Sue Adamsposted 8 years ago

          Having the winter blues?
          Look at it this way, simply by having had the courage to post this thread you are fulfilling a purpose: To cheer up and find something useful and enjoyable to do while contributing to society.

          Aah! Don't you realise how lucky you are? Most people are so busy struggling to survive, they cannot afford the time or devotion to wonder about their purpose in life. They just get on with it. Now you, having that luxury, can snap put of it.

          The hub entitled "How to Treat Stress and Depression with Humor" might pucker up your mood and give you ideas on how to define your purpose again. It could very well be in the field of self improvement to make you fully equipped to help others who could use your considerable skills and enjoy your lovable personality. Just a suggestion.

        10. Shelly Nun-Chucks profile image70
          Shelly Nun-Chucksposted 8 years ago

          I think if some of us are living in states that have winter and we don't like the cold I think we kind of do get cabin fever.

          But what some people have written, focus on "others" volunteer work.

          Or in writing, maybe create your own charity, at least you would know where the money goes smile

        11. Michael-Milec profile image59
          Michael-Milecposted 8 years ago

          Life is beautiful to live at any stage and any age. We are the artists  - each one individually - answering a question 'what do you want?' What do I want? I prepare my breakfast... ( First I talk to my Father), then check my flower plants if they need watering, if the bird feeder has enough seeds...Oh you  are mentioning the HP, go check your  comments and talk back to people, they left some words for you... Go for walk and greet every person with smile, make a positive remarks in exchanging conversation, and keep in mind we are not here on earth for ourselves only to live an d to die. Dyeing should be the last event in our life when we have many plans ahed what to do and an unfinished project will be left behind when the call " come Home " comes...

        12. kimberlyschimmel profile image72
          kimberlyschimmelposted 8 years ago

          Please see a doctor, pastor, or counselor in order to get some help. I've been where you are and waited so long to get help--suffering when I could have been getting better. You are important and need to take care of yourself by finding the people who want to help.

        13. tlcs profile image64
          tlcsposted 8 years ago

          I think maybe you need to get some help from the Doctor, perhaps counselling would help you feel more positive about life.

        14. sosown profile image59
          sosownposted 8 years ago

          You have to care about yourself, if you are waiting for someone to tell you that you are valued, it won't happen.  You must value yourself and your place in the world.  We attract what we want to hear.  If you are telling yourself life sucks you will surround yourself with people who agree.  When you tell yourself and others how great life is, you will be surrounded by those who believe that, too.

        15. aesta1 profile image94
          aesta1posted 8 years ago

          I am surprised as to how many of us feel this way at times. When I do, I welcome this as my inner self's invitation to listen to it. Maybe, it has some needs I have not yet fulfilled or maybe, something inside wants to express itself. These are often the moments when my creativity gets an upward turn. However, there are moments when nothing comes up and I just accept it. I just take it easy and just enjoy doing nothing. I was told once to dialogue with the feeling, listen to it as it will tell you much more. I do that and even if I don't hear anything, just being with it makes it livable.

        16. profile image0
          Lorelei Cohenposted 8 years ago

          I always keep at the back of my mind the thought that if even one person finds new purpose or direction in life because of something I have wrote then my time spent writing has been worth every moment. (I am also just stubborn as spit. Inherited it from my father.)

          Perhaps though it is your purpose as an author to affect those who read your words. That one sentence you write at some point in your career may profoundly change someone (and if you are exceptionally lucky then perhaps you will affect many). Keep writing about the things you feel passionate about. Too heck with whatever is going on around you. Your words will be here and that is all that matters.

        17. SANJAY LAKHANPAL profile image84
          SANJAY LAKHANPALposted 8 years ago

          Whenever I feel like you feel, I just go in the lap of nature. The physical fatigue and the company of nature rejuvenates me. With the passage of time, I again become recharged. It is the routine and purposelessness of life which makes us sad. Wait and watch.

          1. profile image0
            jonnycomelatelyposted 8 years agoin reply to this

            That's a good one, Sanjay.   Another factor that can make us (especially us men) is the sense of feeling trapped, imprisoned, controlled.  Being "in nature" and getting all that fresh air in the open can dispel such feelings of being trapped..... and lift the good feelings of life.

        18. Beaddoodler profile image68
          Beaddoodlerposted 8 years ago

          I've found that I need to "contribute" in different ways to regain my perspective and drive.  Sometimes I focus on doing something just for me.  I know that seems selfish and I was taught to think of others first, but sometimes I'M the important one.  So I make a cup of tea or coffee and just sit with a book, or make a piece of jewelry without worrying about how to make a tutorial for it.  It's just for ME.  Eventually I crawl out of that "why can't I just give up and die" mode and start living again.
          I've also found that extra exercise and watching my diet also contributes to a brighter outlook on life.

        19. profile image0
          CyberCafeposted 8 years ago

          Hello Hubber, I been in this situation,

          I want you to remember this.. When you have "Positive Intention" your mind & body set you up towards better life but when you have "Negative Intention" your mind & body do the opposite, things gets worse. Experienced!

          Take a deep breath and start your day with a smile for 21 days. You see the difference..

          Take Care smile

        20. paradigmsearch profile image60
          paradigmsearchposted 8 years ago

          I have read all the replies since my last post here. Thank you, everyone. I guess the best way to express my feelings is to mention that I put this thread on my main website. I will leave it at the top of the website for at least a week. I also tweeted the critter. I consider it a virtual certainty that it will truly help at least one person out there in the world. A mutual contribution by Hubbers to society indeed.

          This thread also caused me to do a bunch of follows. So I'll be in the HP doghouse for awhile. big_smile

          1. LongTimeMother profile image91
            LongTimeMotherposted 8 years agoin reply to this

            You'll be safe in the doghouse. Keeps the rain off your head!

          2. colorfulone profile image80
            colorfuloneposted 8 years agoin reply to this

            That sounds wonderful!

        21. cfin profile image65
          cfinposted 8 years ago

          Look to Volunteer,

          Look to the Library,

          Look to Travel

          Look to Nature,

          Look to drawing and painting,

          Look to further education through University or online,

          There is so much to this life that sometimes I feel like life is too short to experience it all. The world we live in, including the media would have us scared of everything, and that closes doors. Well open those doors, or even break them down.

          1. profile image0
            jonnycomelatelyposted 8 years agoin reply to this


        22. profile image60
          DJ Andersonposted 8 years ago

          If your thoughts are genuine, I would suggest that you reach out to those who
          are less fortunate.  Senior citizens, nursing homes, children at risk, learn to be a sponsor for alcohol addictions or drug counselor.
          Leave this world a better place than which you found it.   It is that simple.
          I wish you well,

        23. Gloriousconfusion profile image92
          Gloriousconfusionposted 8 years ago

          I'm impressed and amazed by the number of supportive replies you've received in just two days, Paradigm - I do hope you are feeling a bit better today, knowing all those people really care about you.

          1. Silva Hayes profile image80
            Silva Hayesposted 8 years agoin reply to this

            Wish these comments had a "like" button such as Facebook.  I echo these sentiments and would love to hear how you are feeling today.

        24. PurvisBobbi44 profile image91
          PurvisBobbi44posted 8 years ago

          My heartfelt wishes for you Paradigmsearch, and you are not alone. Sometimes being inside day after day will make your last nerve stand up and it is easy to feel blue in the winter months when outdoor activities are slim to none.

          In reference to writing on HubPages, sometimes I could scream at myself for being so silly about Hubber Score—example—my 98 went to 93 and overnight 88, when I just added a new hub. So, what did I do? I walked out of my computer room and took a walk around my yard to blow the cobwebs out of my minds. It will rejuvenate your spirit.

          We are all in the same canoe and sometimes I drop the oar, then some nice hubber will say something nice on one of my hubs that makes me smile. And, I go on to another day of writing what I like.

          I hope you know so many are there to help as your Hubbers Friends.
          Bobbi Purvis

          1. ologsinquito profile image78
            ologsinquitoposted 8 years agoin reply to this

            Paradigmsearch, wishing you the best. Look at all the friends you have here. I hope you feel better soon.

        25. janderson99 profile image56
          janderson99posted 8 years ago
        26. mireland19 profile image90
          mireland19posted 8 years ago

          I wish I could be helpful but I will probably only add to the problem. Might as well give it a go though smile!

          I was holding my 18 month old daughter the other night (because she still needs me to rock her to sleep), and I was trying to remember when she was a tiny newborn. For the life of me I could NOT remember the little meaningful things like what her snoring sounded like back then or how small she felt in my arms. So I decided to read the journal that I started when she was born. I spent the next four hours reading my own unpublished book and I realized that even though someone else might have found my attention to detail a bit, boring, I was revisiting moments that my brain would have never allowed me to remember. My only regret is that I stopped writing when she was about seven months (probably when she took her first step LOL), and I have started again!

          I guess my point is that you must have loved writing at one point, or you would not have enjoyed being on here, and you just need to find that reason again! If you need meaning behind your writing to motivate I cannot think of any better motivation then to be able to look back on all of your fondest memories and really re-live them! Writing about your favorite moment of the day for a week and then read it and tell me it did not make you smile or feel good! It might be something as simple as how you feel when you walk outside and the sun hits you and you smell the warm flowers and freshly cut grass on the warm breeze, I know that would be an awful night memory to revisit right now myself wink!

          Then again maybe you have already tried this and it didn't help I don't know I do know that I hope you find your purpose and meaning because no one should feel as though they are not contributing at all to the world. I am positive there are people you mean a lot to and you might not even realize just how much having you in their life means to them smile!

          Ps. when I am feeling like this I go back to :"writing my book" I will probably never finish it, hell I have barley started it, but the thought of it is what motivates me! Also, when I feel like my writing is all for nothing and I need to get something back from it I visit freelancing sites and do a little dabbling in ghost writing, article writing ect. There really is quite a lot of money to be made if you do it right and you could even start your own freelance writing business! smile Goodluck dear!

        27. liesl5858 profile image84
          liesl5858posted 8 years ago

          Paradigsm, I hope you feel the love of Hubbers and me who care about you and have the strength to carry on regardless. You are not alone, we all go thru a phase like this in life, believe me. I won't be here now if I was not strong enough to face my demons.

        28. Shelly Nun-Chucks profile image70
          Shelly Nun-Chucksposted 8 years ago

          we go through things and last week has been hard.  I been suffering with a migraine
          and have new health insurance but they have new clients backed up and have to wait
          a month

          I know acupuncture is something that will help me.

          The point, as bad as things get and pain that I get with a few others and migraines, my
          head hurts and I go blind in my eye and can't see.

          As I was younger at first I was scared when I went blind in my eye.

          But as I got older I got use to not seeing when it happens and last week was bad.

          I had to stop doing things but will know that there might be some solutions for pain,
          where there will be no side effects with medication as I look into acupuncture.

          I am hoping after each session, I can document after I get it done, because I would
          like to see it "prescribed" for people.

          If they can legalize "pot" for medication purpose, they should seriously think about
          acupuncture too.

          So my whole point of what I wrote, sometimes we go through things and I think everyone
          that has written in here, we are all human and we have compassionate for each other
          and we read each other and feel like, "Yes I been there too".

          The only thing we can do, if we have to sit and cry a little bit to let it out and heck,
          go out side and scream and yell, but be careful they might send a squad car.

          We all go through things.

          I think it is a slump we all feel.

          Never give up, not just to the op but to anyone that is here, keep going.

          Much happiness to anyone that is feeling down.

          1. Billie Kelpin profile image84
            Billie Kelpinposted 8 years agoin reply to this

            and when you're crying in the car and the police pull you over and ask if you're too upset to drive, don't say, "Just give me a ticket"  They WILL!  Re: migraines.  I understand that I know very little, but for 6 months in my life I was getting the kind that are totally debilitating - so painful you can't lift your head off the couch, need it about 60 degress and totally dark accompanied by so much pain you vomit - (that kind).  WELL, the Dr. gave me perscriptions (didn't work); I went to the dentist hoping something external was causing them (didn't work) then someone whose daughter had been suffering for YEARS told me she tried Excedrin Migraine the minute she knew one was coming on and voila! So I decided it couldn't hurt.  They next time when my usual signals and forwarnings appeared (numb cheeks, lightning on the periphery, etc) I took 2 Excedrin Migraine and my headache was totally gone.  From that time on, I kept that miracle in my purse and the SECOND I felt a migraine coming on, I'd take two.  After about a month of doing that, my migraines disappeared FOREVER!  I know this might be a separate and unusual case, but JUST IN CASE you've never tried it, it would make me so happy if the suggestion relied your pain.  Total sympathy from one who FINALLY understands what a migraine REALLY means.

        29. Sed-me profile image76
          Sed-meposted 8 years ago

          I had migraines my whole life. For a few years I had them daily, my life became consumed with how to get more Imitrex to try and subdue them. I had also tried everything. Then someone told me about Inderal ER. Apparently I had too much adrenaline going to my head. I take it everyday and seldom ever have migraines anymore. It was a miracle for me.


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