What is your strategy for coping with failure?

1. 86

   midget38posted 11 years ago

   What is your strategy for coping with failure?

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   dghbrhposted 11 years ago

   I prefer to maintain my cool and think in a calm state of mind for the next move of mine.
   Then I always get to know that the failure of a particular event opens the door for a better opportunity and then it becomes evident that the earlier situation and the chance, whatever was not suitable for me.
   So I am a firm believer of one thing that, if God gives me failure in something its for a matter of time and if I have the patience ( which i always do have) then the best opportunity awaits me at the next door in the most appropriate time:-)
   Good question anyways, midget38 .

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      midget38posted 11 years agoin reply to this

      And he's probably shifting gears for you too! So we have to go with it.

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   whaturmissingposted 11 years ago

   The thought that every failure brings you that much closer to success.

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      midget38posted 11 years agoin reply to this

      We cannot succeed without failing. It's the way of the world.

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   snobletposted 11 years ago

   Failure will always be there, just when.  Its unreal to have all success and no failure.  otherwise I think I would be rich or wealthy lol, failure is part of us, its what makes us work harder.  So fail and just know why and move on, no reason to dwell on what has happened, since it is done.

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      midget38posted 11 years agoin reply to this

      My sentiments exactly,Snoblet!

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   whowasposted 11 years ago

   As the good ol' song says, "Pick myself up, dust myself off and start all over again!"
   
   I actually think that, whatever may happen, you have never failed until you have given up. Unless you give up, no matter how badly it is all going, the game ain't over yet. So don't give up and you cannot fail.
   
   

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      midget38posted 11 years agoin reply to this

      Bingo! Thanks so much for the lovely quotes and insights!

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   stricktlydatingposted 11 years ago

   Always having a back-up plan.  So if you fail you have another idea or plan to go with

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      midget38posted 11 years agoin reply to this

      I'm definitely all for contingency!

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   Gabriel Wilsonposted 11 years ago

   I keep trying. I might change direction but I always keep trying. When I was little I was told you only fail when you don't try. So even though I might not succeed I don't fail either because I tried.
   Very often a new direction or different approach is better than the original. Life is full of up's and down's. I've learned to enjoy the up's and go steady on the down's

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      midget38posted 11 years agoin reply to this

      Thanks for the insights...failure is actually a signal for a change in direction...not a signal that tells one that he is incompetent. We should all embrace it this way!

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   easycashonlineposted 11 years ago

   There is no definite strategy for coping with failure. All you have to do is be tough at all times, even when there is no failure. That means be prepared for the worst always. Expect troubles and failures at all times. When they do not come, you should not be happy. Be surprised instead.

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      midget38posted 11 years agoin reply to this

      Resilience, indeed, is an important ingredient in coping with failure.

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   Sparkle Chiposted 11 years ago

   There are no failures.. only learning experiences!
   
   When faced with what might be seen as a failure, I like to see what I can learn from whatever happened. I use it as a chance to try again by doing something differently.
   
   When we reframe how we see things, it is amazing how much simpler life is! Problems become opportunities. Failures become learning experiences.
   
   We all have the power to choose how we see things, and how we react to them.

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      midget38posted 11 years agoin reply to this

      Breaking down problems into smaller bits helps as well....makes them less daunting. And I think many of us are agreeing that failure is but a learning experience!

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    Lady_Eposted 11 years ago

    I check where I went wrong / learn from it and look for another way or try again.
    For me, learning from it is important, so I turn it round to be a positive thing.

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       midget38posted 11 years agoin reply to this

       Thanks for the insights, Lady E! Yes, failure is but a point of learning. We should never shy away from that.

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    brittvan22posted 11 years ago

    Simple lyrics, "If at first you don't succeed dust yourself off and try again." In other words I am very persistant and very creative so if something doesn't work out then I find what does work and never give up until I do.

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       midget38posted 11 years agoin reply to this

       And we should all do this!

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    yssubramanyamposted 11 years ago

    failure makes me strong to over take it and move forward with tactical approach. it enhances the self determination to work for success.

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       midget38posted 11 years agoin reply to this

       Right! Failure should motivate, not debilitate.

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    Larchinskiposted 11 years ago

    Try to always keep positive and have a back-up plan. Remember sometimes something does not work out for a reason and something better may be waiting around the corner that you might miss, while trying to work on keeping what is failing in your life working.

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       midget38posted 11 years agoin reply to this

       Yes, failure is always a sign that we need to chage our direction.

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    padmendraposted 11 years ago

    Failure and disappointment are part of our life. The only thing is that we need to face and solve the problem with a fresh mind and courage after our failure. Keeping our dream and hope alive might be a reason  that success and happiness will come in our way again.

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       midget38posted 11 years agoin reply to this

       Exactly...be forward looking and positive.....that always paves the way for success!

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    Cre8torposted 11 years ago

    By reminding myself that I am human and that the greatest lessons and inventions have come from this human flaw called imperfection. Every failure leads to a gain in knowledge for someone.

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       midget38posted 11 years agoin reply to this

       It's what we take from failure that's most important, indeed.

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    BobbiRantposted 11 years ago

    I look at all 'failure' as Not failures at all, simply a learning experience.  Something falls through, I learned how Not to do something.

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       midget38posted 11 years agoin reply to this

       Yes. Redirection!

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    Leaderofmanyposted 11 years ago

    get up dust off knees and start over again, never give up, failure is temporary but success is forever.

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       midget38posted 11 years agoin reply to this

       Though the downtimes seem forever, they are but dust that can be shaken off....thanks for the analogy!

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    eddiecarraraposted 11 years ago

    There is no such thing as failure, unless you stop trying

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       midget38posted 11 years agoin reply to this

       A failure is someone who gives up on himself! Yes!

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    Reenileposted 11 years ago

    i will try again taking considerations the reasons why i failed..

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       midget38posted 11 years agoin reply to this

       Failure is a learning experience, indeed.

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    TeaPartyCrasherposted 11 years ago

    Figure out why and avoid it in the future.

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       midget38posted 11 years agoin reply to this

       Failure is a journey of learning!

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    jacharlessposted 11 years ago

    Failure? Does not compute.
    Assessment is the key to understanding "what went wrong". An honest, clear review of every detail. What did you say, do, not say, not do? What did others do, say? Circumstances are just a "loop of events". If you have the same result, again and again, using the same methods or similar ones, then assess the loop. Imagine circling like an airplane, waiting to land. What is keeping your plan(e) from landing: Circumstances. Some good advice is to record yourself speaking or journal the details, so you can go back and review them. Takes very little effort and works wonders. Then, you can add, remove the circumstances delaying your achievement. Technically, the term failure implies a learning experience. Learn and remember that experience to apply or avoid it in the future. Also remember failure does not make a person stronger. In most cases it makes them weaker, because the are consumed by the title: failure or caught up in those circumstances and get confused -what I call "the spins".
    James

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       midget38posted 11 years agoin reply to this

       Wow. This is excellent advice indeed....we should journal things and remember them, lest we go into an endless loop of failure by repeating our errors again and again. Thanks for this little nugget of wisdom!

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       jacharlessposted 11 years agoin reply to this

       Glad to help

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    AnnRandolphposted 11 years ago

    I like the old saying "if you haven't quit trying, you haven't failed yet"

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       midget38posted 11 years agoin reply to this

       Love this too!

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    peanutroasterposted 11 years ago

    Failure is an important part of learning.  Fail fast and early so you can succeed.  Kids especially need the chance to experience failure.  Here is a good quote:
    
    "I've missed more than 9000 shots in my career. I've lost almost 300 games. 26 times, I've been trusted to take the game winning shot and missed. I've failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed."
    Michael Jordan

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       midget38posted 11 years agoin reply to this

       From the Basketball King himself....we should all learn from this!

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    Buzzbeeposted 11 years ago

    This is how I feel about the question:  I do not believe in failure! 
    
    Since I do not believe in it, for anyone at all, then it ceases to be a problem to deal with. I see failure as something that society imposes upon us to 'keep us in line.'  "You don't want to be a failure now do you?" a Father may say to his son.  Well gosh no, of course he doesn't.  But really, where did the father come up with such an insensitive, critical, and ultimately destructive idea?  Why from HIS father of course!  Yep. That's where it came from. Passed on down the line. Generation to generation. It's practically tradition to inflict on our children what was inflicted upon us.  But this doesn't make it right.
    
    In fact, it's very very wrong in my books.
    
    Failure can be applied to my car (i.e. 'the car failed to start) or to whatever inanimate object you wish to use as an example.
    
    However, it should never, ever ever be applied to a human being. 
    
    Hope I didn't go on too much here. I just feel passionate about such things.

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       midget38posted 11 years agoin reply to this

       No, you didn't go in too much, Buzzbee! Yes, failure is something society imposes on us to keep us in line....it's a yardstick of measurement. Yet, it's just measurement...that in itself is subjective. No one should judge!

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    inChristaloneposted 11 years ago

    Accept it.  Whether you are going to fail or not isn't the question but rather what you learn from that failure.  Someone once said, "if you fall down, you have two options; stay down or pick something up off the ground on your way back up."  Too many times people try and find their identity in their successes but some of the greatest men and women in the world are the ones who failed the most.  For example:
    Michael Jordan was cut from his high school basketball team.
    Henry Ford went broke five times before succeeding.
    Walt Disney was fired from a job as a newspaper editor for "lacking imagination".  He went bankrupt several times before finding success with the Disney name.
    Edison failed more than 1000 times at creating the light bulb but when asked about it, he said I didn't fail but I found 1000 ways to not make a light bulb.
    
    We can have success but the best teacher along the way is often failure.

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       midget38posted 11 years agoin reply to this

       Exactly. Though some, of course will argue that the price of the lessons is too high!

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       inChristaloneposted 11 years agoin reply to this

       Those are the people who don't recognize the value of the reward for success.  If success was easy everyone would do it.

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    Ms Deeposted 11 years ago

    Years ago I used to have a fear of failure. But I came to realize all was not lost when I failed. I had to come to realize that it was okay, I was not, or could not, be expected to be perfect (James 3:2). Though I will fall or fail, I can learn from it and try again (Proverbs 24:16, Psalm 119:71), because God will lift me up (Psalm 145:45) and turn what I thought would be a loss to good for me and him (Romans 8:28). He does not waste my failures.

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       midget38posted 11 years agoin reply to this

       God sees us through all failures......we just have to remember that it is His footprints we see in the sand when only 1 pair appears.

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       Ms Deeposted 11 years agoin reply to this

       Exactly, midget! He is there with us all the way, even when we are struggling and failing.

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    malongeposted 11 years ago

    Do not dwell on not being successful at something and try again or move on.  Life is to short to obcess over things that can't be changed.

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       midget38posted 11 years agoin reply to this

       Move forward...it's the only way to go!

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    SwordofManticorEposted 11 years ago

    Failure is a history lesson that improves our quality with the desire to succeed the next time.

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       midget38posted 11 years agoin reply to this

       An apt metaphor! Failure is indeed a quality control manager.

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    tajmanposted 11 years ago

    If it's done and there's nothing I can do about it, I take a deep breath and accept that fact.  Makes no sense dwelling on things you can't change.  If I can change things, even a bit, a put some effort there.  Then I look at what went wrong and take a note for the future.

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       midget38posted 11 years agoin reply to this

       Yes, it's useless dwelling on the things we cannot change. Move forward instead!

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    d.williamposted 11 years ago

    simplest of all:  always expect the worst and you will Never be disappointed.

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       midget38posted 11 years agoin reply to this

       As the old cliche goes...expect the worst and hope for the best!

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    Quirinusposted 11 years ago

    Start with accepting the Now: accept that I feel upset. Try to not judge the situation as either favorable or unfavorable. Relax into whatever I’m feeling (e.g. upset). Try to remember to do the same procedure again on the next experience.  I have written about 4Rs in a previous hub, The Power of Feeling Good Now. Thanks for the reminder of keeping up with the practice!  Practice makes perfect.

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    soundtrack junkieposted 11 years ago

    simple... learn from it, start over and make it better.

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    loidaestilloreposted 11 years ago

    I pray for strength and wisdom.  Strength to overcome the consequences of failing and wisdom to discern the lessons I should get from it.  There were countless times I failed, I get discouraged for a short time but I make sure I get up and go on with life.

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       midget38posted 11 years agoin reply to this

       We all need the guidance of e to deal with our problems, indeed.

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    The Suburban Poetposted 11 years ago

    Keep going.... do not let failure define you; instead let effort and resiliency define who you are.... Virtually everything I've achieved was preceded by failure....

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    Civil War Bobposted 11 years ago

    Failure is a stopping point to look at which road is the next logical option.  If I've learned from mistakes, I'm one of the smartest guys I know.

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    mandarmk9posted 11 years ago

    "All the sorrow, loss and pain,
    I will forget and stand again."
    These line are written by me, and I strongly believe in them. I will forget all the hardships, and make a fresh new start. Its likely that I would avoid all the mistakes I did earlier, not repeating them. Failures can come to anyone at anytime. Positive thinking is a necessity when failures come to you.
    Mandar

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       midget38posted 11 years agoin reply to this

       And we should all practice positive thinking. Putting it in place is our hurdle!

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    opal123posted 11 years ago

    Failure is just natural way in life, for as long as we are here on earth failure is always  in every ways, only if we stumble and fall we know how to stand up again, and always think, that failure is the best experience that lead us in a good and right way, for without failure we cannot do better things in the future, we cannot, have a basis for final decision. for experience is the best teacher in our daily lives.

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       midget38posted 11 years agoin reply to this

       We must learn the hard way in order to grow..."part and parcel of life!

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    weekendposted 11 years ago

    I take to my bed for a month or two. Not everybody can do this, but I'm lucky to have people here who bring me food or anything else I want.

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    Darrell Robertsposted 11 years ago

    Have a positive outlook, instead of thinking of something as a failure think of it as a opportunity to learn and grow from the situations.

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       loidaestilloreposted 11 years agoin reply to this

       very true!

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       midget38posted 11 years agoin reply to this

       Agreed!

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    iamjohngaltposted 11 years ago

    Failure is the motivation that should keep pushing you to succeed. If you don't learn from your mistakes and sojourn through tribulations, you're never going to succeed.
    
    Make sure you learn from every experience in life. Never, ever, stop learning.

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       midget38posted 11 years agoin reply to this

       Totally with you!

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    Rosana Modugnoposted 11 years ago

    I don't believe in failures.  I believe they are opportunities for improvement.  Ergo, you look at what it is that did not get you to the place you wanted to be or the goal you wanted to achieve and retrace your steps, seeing how you could have done things differently and simply re-do.
    
    It's like the New Years Resolution that everyone makes, yet few of us actually succeed in.  We will do it next year, and the next and the next....doesn't really matter.
    
    It depends on what you want to gain, what you are looking for in your own life and start there.  Make a plan, follow through step by step and you will succeed. 
    
    If not, guess what, you're human.  You are not perfect.  Don't expect perfection.  Just expect whatever it is that will make you personally happy.  That should be enough.

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       midget38posted 11 years agoin reply to this

       Yes, failure is simply a change in direction. We just have to take a step back to see how best to restock our lives.

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    newcalendarposted 11 years ago

    Using it as a tool to check what I did wrong or if what I am doing is really what I want to be doing. Often I tend to fail and find I was on totally the wrong track!

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    pstraubie48posted 11 years ago

    I agonize over it for about five minutes. I am a type A personality so making mistakes KILLS me. (I truly am better in this area than I used to be but I still strive for perfection and when I miss the mark, it is difficult for me.)
    However, I analyze the why's of situation to see how I could have handled things so I did not fail. And I tuck the knowledge from the experience away and make every effort to not repeat that which caused the failure ever again.

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       midget38posted 11 years agoin reply to this

       We really have to take the time to assess our errors - that's how we improve on them!

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    nassaugirlposted 11 years ago

    We must remember that no one is perfect. We will not always get it right the first time. If we try and fail, it's ok, but not trying at all is the biggest failure.
    
    I am a big fan of the saying, "IF AT FIRST YOU DON'T SUCCEED, TRY AGAIN." This is something I live by. Failure gives me the drive that I need to try even harder next time. This is my strategy for coping with failure.

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       midget38posted 11 years agoin reply to this

       Yes. Failure only means trying and redirecting, not giving up. THAT would be failure!

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    elsiebethposted 11 years ago

    The first step I would take is to appreciate the failure.  It takes a little time and effort to learn to appreciate failure.  Success is so much easier  I learned to appreciate failure when I worked  in auto sales.  In sales we have many unsuccessful attempts to sell an item  before we actually make the sale.  We soon learn how many times on average we fail before we actually make a sale.  If we don't make the attempt there is not going to be a sale.  We know that most attempts will fail.  That is not the good part.  However, if we know that out of every ten attempts we usually make a sale then we begin to appreciate the failures because they are bringing us closer to the sale.  Ok we struck out seven times that sale will be coming pretty soon now.
    
    The second step is to go back to the beginning after a failure.  Get back to basics.  Go back to what you know and what has worked well for you.  You can analyze your mistakes and what you did well from that point.  It is not the time to try a fancy new sales technique before you have even sold your monthly quota.  If you are trying to teach Fido to sit and he has done well for several days and suddenly he decides to lie down when you say "sit" don't shoot the dog.  Go back to the basics of teaching the sit and start over. 
    
    Never ever give up until you have given it everything you can, and know why you failed and decided the success is just not worth the effort.  Sure you can probably be a straight A student but do you really want to work that hard or is mostly A's and a few B's worth having more time for other activities?  make sure what you are working toward is worth the effort.

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       midget38posted 11 years agoin reply to this

       You are so right!! We must remember the times we do succeed, even of they are fewer than when we fail. With gratitude for that, we can turn the balance in our Gabor.

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    ExpressFreeposted 11 years ago

    Failures are always a part of man's life.  It should not be treated as something negative but to look at it as a positive thing.  It is through failures that we learn and become a better person. We will not be able to know the real meaning of success or victory not unless we have experience failures in our lives.  It is a blessing in disguise that builds our character and motivate us to  do better so that we can reach perfection.  When you failed the best thing to do is to keep on trying and never give up. To have a positive mind set and to put on courage.  You must persevere and press forward till the end.  Everyone of us run our own race with different struggles and challenges in many aspects but how we deal with it makes a great difference whether we end up winning or losing.  You must have the right attitude to deal with any problem.  If you need help, don't hesitate to approach a friend or seek a sound advice.  Do not treat failures as a setback for you but a set-up to lift you higher in the future.

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       midget38posted 11 years agoin reply to this

       I agree. We are so often caught up with failure and feel as though no one else struggles. The thing to remember is that all of us feel it and must move on in order to succeed.

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