My Mother Only Has Weeks

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  1. AEvans profile image74
    AEvansposted 13 years ago

    Yesterday we went to the Oncologist. She has been fighting for her life since October 2009. They reviewed her scans and her tumors metasticized on her liver and there is a small lesion on her kidney. She now has tumors in both lungs, but they say her colon, breast, and brain are clear. When the doctor said she only had weeks, I lost it. She says she will be here for Christmas, I hope deep in my heart she is. I pray everyday because she is the only mother we have.

    Writing this is the hardest thing to do, but the pain I feel inside is horrendous. My heart aches and I try to be joyful when I am filled with sorrow. Tears flow from my eyes, when I should have sunshine.

    My mother lives with us so the last 24 hours has been so hard. I have siblings who treat her horribly and that upsets me too. She is and was a great mom. I wrote about that. 

    I will try with all of my might to write on HP, greet or even comment. But if my words are not so cheerful it is because I am so sad.

    If you have faith please pray for her and if you do not just send some sunshine. I need a little ray of hope on a cloudy day.

    Has anyone else gone through Cancer and lived even longer when they had liver and lung cancer? If you have known someone who has or have experienced it please share it. Right now my eyes are clouded.

    1. profile image0
      SirDentposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      I will certainly pray for her and for your family as well. As you may well know, my mother in law passed away this past February. My wife and I cared for her for two years. Her other daughters never came around to see her or to help except one came one time to spend a few hours with her.

      If your other siblings treat her badly, tell them to stay away. Remeber, it is your house not theirs. Don't be too proud to ask hospice to come help if you need it.

      I can only assume she is a Christian so I will add something that Jesus said, speaking of Himself. "I have come to give you life."

      Life is the opposite of death.

      1. AEvans profile image74
        AEvansposted 13 years agoin reply to this

        Hospice will be here next week, and she is a Christian , so thank you so much for the prayers.

    2. IzzyM profile image88
      IzzyMposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      Years ago, a close friend's father was given six months to live. He had cancer and it had spread.
      Strangely enough, he lived another 20 years after this prognosis was delivered.
      I hope your mother's cancer goes into remission too. Big hugs, girl. We are all here with you, every step of the way. Who knows, even when things look black, the strangest things can happen. Sometimes, even terminal cancers can go into remission without any medical help.
      It happened to my friend's father.

      1. AEvans profile image74
        AEvansposted 13 years agoin reply to this

        That is a sory of a miracle , words that can make someone have hope. As I go through these and read each individual person's comment I am beginning to find a little.

    3. thooghun profile image96
      thooghunposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      I have no similar experience to share with you. But I felt compelled to post a reply: I feel your pain, I may not understand it, but I can feel it.

      But save the pain for later, its time to FIGHT, and to defy fate.

      1. AEvans profile image74
        AEvansposted 13 years agoin reply to this

        You are right although I sit here and cry I need to be a warrior, and stay strong. We will battle this together and we will weather the storm.

    4. Mark Knowles profile image58
      Mark Knowlesposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      Sorry to hear this. Cancer is no fun for anyone involved. Be strong.......... You can fall apart after. sad

      1. AEvans profile image74
        AEvansposted 13 years agoin reply to this

        I am trying, I am really trying fallng part now is only going to make it worse. I had to just reach out because I have cried for two days and I am a mess to my family. I will work on this in the next coulpe of days, tomorrow is a new day.

    5. Marisa Wright profile image88
      Marisa Wrightposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      AEvans, I am so sorry to hear your news.  As others have said, there are cases of people whose cancer has gone into remission, so you never know.  However, having watched my own mother linger painfully through liver cancer, I have to say that it may not be a bad thing if her time on earth is short.  It is heart-wrenching to lose a loved one but sometimes, giving them permission to go is a more loving thing to do than encouraging them to suffer so they can stay with you.

      1. AEvans profile image74
        AEvansposted 13 years agoin reply to this

        I know and your understanding and knowledge is heartfelt. Yu experienced it and it certainly is not nice. Thank you so much for your thoughtful words too.

    6. Stevennix2001 profile image83
      Stevennix2001posted 13 years agoin reply to this

      omg, thats terrible.  im so sorry to hear this is happening to you and your mom.  I hope your mom will be okay.  i know losing someone close to you or having to witness them suffer, like you, isn't that easy.  I'm sincerely sorry about your situation, and i'll be sure to pray for things to work out for you.  as far as the rest of your family goes, i always said that you can always see people's true colors when the chips are down in life.  thats all im going to say about that.  anyway, i hope things get better for you.

      1. AEvans profile image74
        AEvansposted 13 years agoin reply to this

        Thank you so much and when it comes to family their true colors can shine. But with my heart, I will embrace mom and forget about what makes me angry about them. Whatever choices they have made will be on them.

    7. bgamall profile image70
      bgamallposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      It is great that you love and take care of  your mom.

      1. AEvans profile image74
        AEvansposted 13 years agoin reply to this

        Everyday and she has been a blessing and made me laugh and smile.

    8. herbdr profile image60
      herbdrposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      Please encourege your mom to keep fighting the most important part of all of this is to REMAIN POSITIVE. this is a reprint of another email. Two things, you need to start taking Vitamin D3 2,000 for self protection. Relax you can not change any thing. there good information in my blog. herbdrposted 7 days ago

      "Hi there, my job is to console and comfort the terminally ill yes and I am exceptionally good at it. With that said if he is still responsive there is slim hope with holistic means due to time and even slimmer with traditional due to the fact that they stop chemo. He needs to be able to swallow to use most holistic information. Let me make it clear that I am not a DOCTOR and I AM NOT GIVING YOU ADVICE just telling you about others who survived, I have no financial interest in the products mentioned. The ultimate decision is in the hands of Faith! I can't give you my links or hubs but until UNCLE GIVES UP, Google and search for natural products that have alledged cytotoxic behavior with cancer cells. I will include you and your family in my most sincere prayers." Good Luck

    9. Goodpal profile image80
      Goodpalposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      I empathize with the suffering your family, and your mother in particular, must be going through. Please do not give up on her - doctors and their scans are not necessarily wisdom of God Almighty.

      From the personal experience of seeing miraculous effects of a Chinese herb - Tian Xian - on a 78 year old man with lever cancer, who doctors refused to operate and gave just few weeks more to live, I would suggest you to visit the following site:

      The old man mentioned above was almost bed-ridden for 2 years before the dooms day prediction by the "expert doctors". His son, my friend, was bold enough to read through the above site and order the medicine immediately.

      Results: After 3 months all medical tests were almost normal for the person of that age - Doctors surprised of course. But this is not the point.

      After another 2 months the "Old Man" became bold enough to tour far off places, that he had planned long ago but could not go because he was on bed, with his wife.

      He was a man without any symptoms of cancer and regained his earlier cheerful self. About 6 months later he died a normal death - not as a victim of cancer.

      At the above site you will find testimonials from all types of farmer cancer patients who should have died long ago as per the "experts" and "doctors" but are leading a normal healthy life.

      I am sharing this info only out of goodwill and compassion.

      DISCLAIMER: I have no idea how this herb works nor do I have any financial interest in promoting this herb. Please use your own judgment and do your own research.

    10. profile image50
      smallfox1posted 13 years agoin reply to this

      My heart goes out mother was diagnosed with bowel cancer in jan.this has since spread 2 her liver and stomach and 2day her oncologist has told me that she only has weeks left.I am numb ;o( i suspected as much but it knocked me over to have it confirmed.My Mum is my best friend and im just not ready 2 b without her.How do people cope? I love her so much

    11. profile image0
      mtsi1098posted 13 years agoin reply to this

      your mom is still in our prayer circle...

    12. Stevennix2001 profile image83
      Stevennix2001posted 12 years agoin reply to this

      im so sorry to hear that aevans. i had no idea. i hope you'll be okay.  losing a loved one is never easy. i'm sorry to hear that you've had to go through all that though. sad

    13. Shahid Bukhari profile image60
      Shahid Bukhariposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      I am a fellow human, I pray,
      May The Lord help you, in these hours of your tribulations.

  2. Joy56 profile image69
    Joy56posted 13 years ago

    hi so sorry to hear of your pain.  My mum had cancer of the bowel, then it spread to her liver, they operated but she died on the operating tanle.

    I can feel your grief it is overwhelming.  It was almost 2 years ago when she died and now i am looking after my dad he is very sick too......

    Is your mum well enough to talk, maybe you can talk to her about good times and re live old memories.  I know you are a god fearing person, and god promises he will not let us suffer more than we can bear.  My prayers are with you, i am here anytims.

    1. AEvans profile image74
      AEvansposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      Her and I talk , she lives with us. But all I do is cry,I have to get my strength so we can laugh again. Thank you so much for your positive thoughts and your story I do find comfort in your words. I will keep your father in my prayers too.

  3. Cagsil profile image73
    Cagsilposted 13 years ago

    I'm saddened to hear that AEvans! sad hmm

    I've lost my dad and still have my mom. I know the feeling. hmm

    1. AEvans profile image74
      AEvansposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      I knw you do and no matter what it does not feel very good, when you try to smile when you heart is aching. I am so glad that you hae your mom, embrace her.

  4. profile image0
    Kathryn LJposted 13 years ago

    I am so sorry you are in this situation.  This is a bad day for you and your mum and my thoughts are with you.  I do not have the knowledge you are seeking about your mums prognosis.  All I can say is you will get through this and support your mum.  It may not seem like it at the moment but this is a special time in your life and an opportunity for you and your mum and your relationship.  This time is precious despite the indescribable pain and you will one day find much that is positive.  For now, be kind to yourself, you are brave and a daughter to be proud of.

    1. AEvans profile image74
      AEvansposted 13 years agoin reply to this


      Thank you for the kind words, you are right one day I will reflect on the words and days, but right now I believe I will weather the storm. Those are wonderful words that I will hold in my heart.

  5. Flightkeeper profile image68
    Flightkeeperposted 13 years ago

    AEvans, I really have no words to console you at this very difficult time.  You and your mother will be in my thoughts and prayers.

    1. AEvans profile image74
      AEvansposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      Thank you flightkeeper for the prayers, we need all the prayers we can get.

  6. Mighty Mom profile image78
    Mighty Momposted 13 years ago

    Hi AEvans,
    No matter what the circumstances are, we are never prepared to lose our parents.
    You have many friends here who love and support you.
    If I could offer one piece of advice from my own experience (have been through sickness/death of my Mom, Dad and Father-in-Law) it is this:
    Focus on right here, right now. You don't know how long your Mom has. Only God does.
    Try (I know it's really hard) to live in the moment.
    Tune out the distraction of your siblings.
    Concentrate on YOUR relationship with your Mom.

    There are plenty of us Hubbers who have walked this path ahead of you. This I know: You WILL get through it, and you will be a richer human being as a result.

    Big hugs to you and prayers for you and your Mom,

    1. AEvans profile image74
      AEvansposted 13 years agoin reply to this


      I remember your story, I read it and felt your heart whe you wrote those words. I will try to focus , ask God for strength and find laughter in these days. Although it hurts so much I can do it. Thnk you for your support.

  7. Alison Graham profile image95
    Alison Grahamposted 13 years ago

    Hi, I am so sad to read your post - it is so hard to see someone we love suffer.  I lost my Dad this March and my Mum three years ago, I miss them very much.  In answer to your question about if anyone knows someone who has survived longer than expected, a dear friend of my Daughter (the mum of her best friend) died just recently after six years battle with cancer, when she was initially only given six months.  She was a tremendous inspiration to us all, a lovely, Christian lady who lived life to the full. She managed to hold on for her Daughter to arrive from USA on the Sunday and they all had a family day together on the Monday before she fell into a coma and died a few days later.  I pray that your Mom will confound all expectations, my thoughts are truly with you.

    1. AEvans profile image74
      AEvansposted 13 years agoin reply to this


      That is a beutiful story and thank you so much for the prayers. I am sorry to hear about your parents and all of you are giving me strength when my closest friends don't seem to be enough.

  8. myownworld profile image75
    myownworldposted 13 years ago

    Sending all my love and many prayers for you and your family. You're a special and very compassionate person AE... know that you're in our thoughts and wished well... take care x

    1. AEvans profile image74
      AEvansposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      Thank you for your thoughtful words, sometimes this is the only place that I seem to get solace.

  9. profile image0
    SirDentposted 13 years ago

    This is a poem I wrote a few years ago about my mother and her bout with cancer. It is published here on HubPages.


    She found the lump on her breast one day
    Didn't go to the doc, nothing to say
    Passing it off like nothing matters
    Until that day our hearts were shattered

    Sick and defeated she died in her bed
    Burying mother is what I would dread
    I recall all the times she was happy and free
    My dear Lord please, don't let this thing be

    Then I heard a voice so still and small
    Be of good cheer my child she is in awe
    She lives with me now praising my name
    Just wants you to know life isn't the same

    She made her choice to live life for me
    Decided to not get help and be set free
    Make wise choices as through life you go
    Get the help you need and don't tell me no

    The doctors use the wisdom I gave
    So cancer cannot make you its slave.


    I know it isn't the best poem and it was written in a hurry but I hope that it can help you to get peace.

    1. AEvans profile image74
      AEvansposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      That is so touching, can you e-mail me a copy of that? I ould like to print it with permission and place it in my office as a reminder, if you don't mind.

  10. profile image0
    Charlinexposted 13 years ago

    I am very sorry to hear that. I have just become your follower at someone's recommendation.

    Take good care of your mother and yourself.

    1. AEvans profile image74
      AEvansposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      You didn't have to follow, but thank you. Thank you for your prayers.

  11. Misha profile image64
    Mishaposted 13 years ago

    My thoughts are with you and your mom, Julianna...

    1. AEvans profile image74
      AEvansposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      Thank you Misha, it is so hard when you cn't stop crying but I will gather my thoughts and get my strength, it just hurts.

  12. Beth100 profile image70
    Beth100posted 13 years ago

    AE -- I am very sorry to hear that your mother, you and your family are enduring such pain and grief.  My heart reaches out to you as well as my prayers.  I have no words other than I am here for you.  {{HUGS}}

    1. AEvans profile image74
      AEvansposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      Thank you Beth and thank you for the (((hug)))

  13. Aficionada profile image81
    Aficionadaposted 13 years ago

    HUGS, and love, and prayers for all of you.

    1. AEvans profile image74
      AEvansposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      Thank you bunches

  14. blondepoet profile image67
    blondepoetposted 13 years ago

    Oh AE can't even imagine what you are going through. My heart and thoughts are with you and your family. xoxoxoxox

    1. AEvans profile image74
      AEvansposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      It hurts especially after you have gone to every appointment and remember the day when your mom said she was going to beat this thing. That is what makes you teary eyed and cry. I know I just have to be strong, but sometimes you just have to get it all out in order to get the strenght to carry on.

  15. Lisa HW profile image63
    Lisa HWposted 13 years ago

    AEvans, so, so, sorry to know your mother, you and your family are dealing with.  Most of us have heard of those times when someone surprises everyone by having more time, or even going into remission.  The man across the street from me was given "x number of weeks" I don't know how many times, only to show up, gardening in his yard again.  Years (about nine, I think) after he first was diagnosed, his time did run out, but that was years after so many of those "x-weeks-left" things.  (I can offer that my mother went through two surgeries where she was given only a 10% chance of getting through each time, and both times she got through them and shocked the doctors.)

    When my husband was thought to have cancer, but was later diagnosed with another potentially life-threatening condition, I was expecting our youngest child, had one three-year-old, and one eight-year-old.  After spending hours "in horror" I decided that I would not mourn for someone who was still here.  It's a good thing I did, because today our youngest child is 25.

    Stay strong for now.  Somehow, most of us have a way of kind of keeping the seriousness of things in our mind while also letting a little hope go alongside the rest of it.

    I went through losing my mother after a long-term illness, and I know there's nothing I can say to make you feel even a little better right now.  The one thing that got me through, though, was keeping in mind that my mother was an adult, had made her peace with things, and was kind of wanting to be able to "just rest".  Now, as the mother of grown kids, myself, I'd want my kids to keep in mind that I'm a grown-up and here on my own terms, as everyone is.  In other words, while I'd prefer not to "leave", I'd want them to keep in mind that I'd be fine and was still their same, old, strong, mother I've always been.  Chances are your mother sees herself that same way. 

    Sincerest, sincerest, wishes/prayers for you that things turn around.  I know one thing, though, and that was when my suffering mother did eventually "go" I was surprised to know that my first response was relief at not seeing her suffer any longer.  (I'd thought I was more selfish than that, but apparently I wasn't as selfish as I'd thought. )

    1. AEvans profile image74
      AEvansposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      Your stories are wonderful and your words are not selfish. You have given hope and compassion. I have to get my strength to stand by her side and not keep falling apart when she needs me the most.

  16. Ohma profile image61
    Ohmaposted 13 years ago

    I am sorry to hear of your mom's struggle. I hope that all of your family can find support in loving each other in this time.

    1. AEvans profile image74
      AEvansposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      I hope so too! A couple of hours ago, I put my brother-in-law in his place. I am tired of how my siblings act and they are so selfish. I am just going to focus on our family and mom.

  17. frogdropping profile image78
    frogdroppingposted 13 years ago

    My thoughts are with your mom, you and yours AE.

    1. AEvans profile image74
      AEvansposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      Thank you so much .

  18. Haunty profile image74
    Hauntyposted 13 years ago

    I am very sorry, Julianna. It must be very hard. I hope you can find some peace.

    1. AEvans profile image74
      AEvansposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      I am searching, it will come from somewhere I can't let the kids always see my cry or they are going to be a mess.

  19. Diane Inside profile image74
    Diane Insideposted 13 years ago

    I have worked with so many people in the hospital who was given only months or even weeks to live who has lived for years past that.  Make sure your mother knows that doctors are not God. No one knows when, they are only estimating from past experience and what they know about the disease. And they don't know everything about the disease.  I hate it when they give a time line.  I hope and pray for only the best for your mom and your family. Try to stay positive. And remember that if your mom owants to stay around, she just may do that. Her will is stronger than any disease. I feel for you and you are so brave to write to everyone here. God bless you and your mom.

  20. Ohma profile image61
    Ohmaposted 13 years ago

    I have heard that there are people who have a sense about the time of their death.
    My Grandmother was ill for years not cancer related but she always said that she would never leave us until she met and spoke to her first great, great, grandchild. She lived until the year my oldest grandson stated speaking. She lived long enough to hear him tell her he loved her.

    1. Diane Inside profile image74
      Diane Insideposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      I do agree with you about this, people do have a sense of when they are going to die. Especially when it is an illness.  My grandmother, was a fighter and when she was at a healthy time in her last days, she stated that this would be her last Christmas and it was.  But I believe it was because she had made peace with it , not because of anything the doctors said.  The doctors told my grandfather one time when he was in ICU that he would not live throught the night.  Called all the family in and we sat there all night.  Praying and just being with him. The next morning you would not have known he was even sick.  He lived for ten more years with COPD.

      1. AEvans profile image74
        AEvansposted 13 years agoin reply to this

        That is a beautiful story. Mom says she is going to be here for Christmas and I keep praying she is going too. The truth is I am scared to death to lose her and I don't know how to get past it. I really have to let go and let God or I am never going to get through it.

        1. Diane Inside profile image74
          Diane Insideposted 13 years agoin reply to this

          If she believes she will be here Christmas then I would look for it to happen.  She sounds like a strong individual.  And She may know more than all of us and the doctors combined.  God Bless her. and you.

  21. emievil profile image67
    emievilposted 13 years ago

    So sorry to hear about your mother. My prayers go out for her and your family. Be strong.

    1. AEvans profile image74
      AEvansposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      I am going to try, and thank you for the prayers. I have to lift myself out of these tears and all of you are making me feel a little better. I think I need to pray for strength.

  22. profile image0
    Will Bensonposted 13 years ago

    "Has anyone else gone through Cancer and lived even longer when they had liver and lung cancer? If you have known someone who has or have experienced it please share it. Right now my eyes are clouded."

    I'm deeply sorry that you are going through these sad times. Both of my parents died of cancer and for a long time that was what I focused on when I thought about them.

    No doctor ever gave us an estimate of survival time, nor did we ask. I think it can vary by quite a bit. You might ask her doctors if she is qualified for any experimental trials for new medications or treatments. This might give both you and her a sense of fighting back, regardless of the outcome.

    There will come a time when you'll look back on her life with no heaviness in your heart. You'll tell stories, laugh and reminisce without pain...I promise.

    Peace and strength.

    1. AEvans profile image74
      AEvansposted 13 years agoin reply to this


      Thank you for the positive reassurance. I will call her doctor and ask about the clinicals. You can bet on it.

      1. profile image0
        Will Bensonposted 13 years agoin reply to this

        If you want to research on your own, here's one place to start.

      2. Faybe Bay profile image66
        Faybe Bayposted 13 years agoin reply to this

        When I was 8 my dad was given 1 to 6 months to live, he had bone cancer, which travels through the bone marrow and goes every where. He had 5 tumors removed but they said he would die if they didn't remove his leg. He told the Doctor "If you take my leg I can't go back to work" The Doctor explained he couldn't work if he was dead either. My mom said he pulled the Doctor close and said, "Listen to me, you know it's already in my lungs, it's in my brain too, isn't it?" When the Doctor couldn't meet his eyes he looked at my mother and said, "Mama I'm going home" and she nodded.
        He lived 3 more years. My mom and the Doctor said it was pure determination on his part. He knew how long he had to work to get everything set for us. When he passed away the house was paid off by insurance and my mom got a hefty sum from a life insurance policy she didn't even know he had.
        That was 40 years ago. They have made a lot of advances since then. Keep the faith and don't give up, and don't let her give up either.

  23. Randy Godwin profile image60
    Randy Godwinposted 13 years ago

    My sympathies, AE!  I'm glad you have so many people here supporting you in this terribly bad time.  Do the best you can and try not to worry too much!

  24. geegee77 profile image64
    geegee77posted 13 years ago

    Im so sad for you right now, it is such a coincidence too because a very dear friend of mine just found out last Friday she only has months to live because of lung cancer also. She is a very good friend but I can't even imagine if it were my mom. Thank God we still have her. I will pray for God to give you peace and pray to give you and your family strength to deal with this, and cherish every moment with her. God Bless You. :)ge

  25. donotfear profile image84
    donotfearposted 13 years ago

    Hi AEvans.

    My mother died of multiple myeloma in March '09.  I watched her whither away to nothing & was there, with my husband, while she took her last breath. I'm glad I chose to be with her.

    Spend each special moment with your Mom. Let your tears flow. Allow it.

    Cancer is a dreadful thing. I have not known anyone who had  lung or liver cancer, but I can tell you, multiple myeloma is pretty bad. It attacks the bone marrow & is very painful, like lung cancer.

    You aren't alone. I have felt what you are feeling. Others here have also sensed the blow. Feel it, be with it. And, as my mother used to say, "Tomorrow will be better".

  26. rebekahELLE profile image84
    rebekahELLEposted 13 years ago

    I'm sorry to hear your news AE. the heart is both fragile and strong, you will experience both. I can't tell you how to be or what to expect other than to be your mother's beautiful, strong daughter.
    you have much more strength than you know, you will find it.

    this song always inspires me, I hope it can help you. {{hugs}} … re=related

  27. profile image0
    ralwusposted 13 years ago

    Hang in there Julianna! Sending you some sunshine soon. You know my story. I still have it, and I have out lived the old date previously given. Just hold her close and give her what ever she desires. Tell those family members to stay away if they can't be nice. much love to you girl.

  28. AEvans profile image74
    AEvansposted 13 years ago


    Thank you I will reserch and found that Berkeley also has clinicals so I have e-mailed them.

    geeggee77: Tell your friend to ask her Doctor if she can do radiation and chemo. Thank you for praying for us, we will pray for your friend.

    That was a wonderful story and another ray of hope, it made me smile.

    The pain is horrendous, but today we actually laughed and smiled. She spoke to family today back in Ne. and they told her to keep fighting. She said she will be here for Christmas and today I felt hope. I have to try and stay positive no matter how hard it is. I am also saddened by your mother and as you know the pain can run deep. thank you so much for your support.


    That song was beautiful, I love Elton John and you are right somewhere deep inside I will find it. Today she told me to just keep writing and I promised tomorrow I would. I am going to try hard to lift my spirits and write something interesting.


    I am going to try and not worry to much. Sometimes it is hard because she lives with us, but she is strong so all of you are right I have to be strong for her.

    Diane Inside,

    Thank you for being so positive, deep within my heart I try to believe it too. If she says she is going to be here, she will be here. I just have to have faith.


    You certainly have out did what they said it is a positive mental attitude. I gave them a what for on the phone last night and was relieved. It took a lot of stress off of me. Tomorow is a new day. Thanks my friend fo your words.

    ** Today was a little better, we laughed told stories and focused on positive things. We are going to enjoy every moment an when I have to cry I will do it privately so she cannot see. I love my mom bunches and she has raised us to be strong. If she says she will be here, for Christmas she will be here, she is determined and I have to be too.

  29. manlypoetryman profile image79
    manlypoetrymanposted 13 years ago

    Sorry to hear such sad news, AE...thoughts and prayers with you and your Mom.

  30. AEvans profile image74
    AEvansposted 13 years ago


    Thank you bunches if only ur world could find a complete cure for cancer, that would be a wonderful thing.

  31. Mighty Mom profile image78
    Mighty Momposted 13 years ago

    Hi AEvans,
    Thank you for sharing your experience with us. Getting reports --however often you feel like posting them -- brings your Hub family together around you in a circle of love.

    Prayer can work miracles.
    Namaste and hugs,

  32. KCC Big Country profile image83
    KCC Big Countryposted 13 years ago

    I'm so very sorry, AEvans.  I'm sending much love and positive thoughts your way for you and your mother.

    I would spend every moment I could laughing and talking about things you both find amusing.  Watch "I Love Lucy" episodes, etc.  A positive attitude and laughter work wonders.  I know it's tough.

    If talking about Christmas helps her perk up, then talk about how to decorate the tree this year, or making a Christmas list, looking for new dessert recipes to try, etc.

    You're a strong lady and you'll know how to handle this.

  33. Mike Lickteig profile image77
    Mike Lickteigposted 13 years ago

    AE, so very sorry to hear about your mother.  I hope she does make it to Christmas--that would be a blessing.  My brother died from cancer three years ago next week.  It was a long battle for him but he maintained his dignity and good spirits right up to the end.

    Your family will be in my thoughts and prayers, and I hope you will take good care of yourself during this especially difficult time.

  34. BobbiRant profile image61
    BobbiRantposted 13 years ago

    I'm so sorry for you troubles and know your mom is in my prayers.

  35. AEvans profile image74
    AEvansposted 13 years ago


    Thank you for the e-mail and thank you for your prayers.


    Thank you for your positive thoughts and love.

    Mike Lickteig: I didn't realize you lost your brother to cancer , thank you for your thoughts and prayers.

    Bobbi Rant Thank you for your prayers.

    This morning mom was rushed to the hospital because she was complaining of left pain in her shoulder. I just spoke to her doctor and they are admitting her. They are going to do an MRI because they cannot determine if it is a mass near her collar bone, or a herniated disc. I am staying positive, well trying to anyway. I will go and see her later and update everyone on her progress.

    1. prettydarkhorse profile image55
      prettydarkhorseposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      Ms Aevans, prayers for you and your family, must be tough and hard times for you right now, so I am sending hugs and prayers

    2. KCC Big Country profile image83
      KCC Big Countryposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      So sorry to hear you're having to admit her.  Do take care, AEvans.  Sending much more positive energy your way!

  36. liljen23 profile image77
    liljen23posted 13 years ago

    Hi AE, I am so sorry to hear this sad and my prayers go out to you and your family and to hope everything turns out good for you. The only suggestion I can tell you is take one day at a time and spend every moment with your mom. Keep praying AE!! smile smile

  37. AEvans profile image74
    AEvansposted 13 years ago

    This afternoon I spoke to her Doctor , I am feeling more positive she has degenerative bones in the upper left side. I would rather have that, then another mass of cancer. They have her on pain meds and they are going to get her pain managed before they send her home. They also have to get her to have a Bowel movement, because she hasn't did it for a few days. sad But the upside is, she is still with us and all of you have giving me strength to keep on going.

    1. Joy56 profile image69
      Joy56posted 13 years agoin reply to this

      thanks for the update, thinking of you and your family.  This is a difficult time for you.  She will feel better when she gets all the toxins out of ther system.

  38. Cagsil profile image73
    Cagsilposted 13 years ago

    Hey AEvans, that is positive news and I'm happy to hear it. smile Thank you for posting. smile big_smile

  39. elayne001 profile image81
    elayne001posted 13 years ago

    So sorry to hear about your mother AEvans. My mother got sick and was put in the hospital a couple of years ago. She was expected to get better, but she passed away suddenly. It was pretty shocking for us all, especially my Father. I know it is hard to watch her suffer, but at least you can spend time with her and let her know of your love.

  40. pylos26 profile image70
    pylos26posted 13 years ago

    Hi AE…you certainly have an abundance of friends and true supporters during this time of grief. Your sadness is felt by many here in our little world @ HP. Pylos.

  41. pisean282311 profile image63
    pisean282311posted 13 years ago

    i dont know what to say to you ..i just want u to know that i wish u all the strength during this testing time..give all love , care to you mother...

  42. Faybe Bay profile image66
    Faybe Bayposted 13 years ago

    I am updating and asking everyone to join in the prayer circle for AEvans mom and for her Uncle. I got her hub that was published a few short hours ago, and her mom has taken a turn for the worse.

    She asks for prayer for "Rita Nolan" (her mom) and also for "Uncle Clyde" (her Uncle).

    Here's her hub, if anyone would like to send personal well wishes and prayers there:

  43. Jane@CM profile image61
    Jane@CMposted 13 years ago

    Many prayers sweetie!

  44. Denise Handlon profile image86
    Denise Handlonposted 13 years ago

    Hi AEvans, we haven't met, but I saw your post and I'm sorry to hear the news. I know what it's like to lose someone to cancer. My mother died of lung cancer in '03 and my husband died of esophageal cancer in'05. I was grateful that I was there at their side to care for them during their transition from this world. 

    I'm glad to hear that hospice is involved.  They are a wonderfully, supportive organization. My thoughts and prayers are with you as you continue this vigil.  Please do not hesitate to contact me if you would like to chat off the hubpage.

  45. Wendy Krick profile image64
    Wendy Krickposted 13 years ago

    Sending you my thoughts and Prayers.

  46. fucsia profile image60
    fucsiaposted 13 years ago

    I am very sorry for your pain. I have not the right words to say to you, but I would tell you to enjoy the life that still remains to her, every moment is precious. The most important thing is to stay close to her, with humility and sincerity. The values she taught you and continues to teach you will never die.
    If you can,  do not think at the future, but live with her today, this moment.

    1. AEvans profile image74
      AEvansposted 13 years agoin reply to this


      Thank you and you can bet I will be contacting you off of the page.

      Thank you to everyone for your support and I have decided to write about this journey on HP. it has already began. I don't know why it has been placed on my heart, but it will either break me or make me stronger. All of you are a blessing on HP and I thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my heartache and supporting me on this journey.

  47. LaMamaLoli profile image60
    LaMamaLoliposted 13 years ago

    My heart goes out to you, my father died of cancer so I have an idea of how you feel, although we are each unique. I just wanted to offer you a little ray of sunshine - and it is little as each case is different. My friends father was diagnosed with a rare, eventually terminal disease six years ago, he has since got diabetes, kidney failure, he has blood transfusions every two or three weeks, he has had pneumonia and been on oxygen. He has been given "hours" to live on numerous occasions, but has always pulled through. He now also has bowel cancer, but this time the doctors simply said to my friend, look, we don't know what this means for your father. They don't know why but this man is still walking around, independant- he is very ill- don't get me wrong, and he takes lots of medication, but he has quality of life. He should have been dead a long time ago according to the doctors, but he isnt. At the end of the day, it's God who decides when its time for us to go, so just enjoy every minute you have with your mother and may there be many of them. x

  48. earnestshub profile image83
    earnestshubposted 13 years ago

    My very best hopes and wishes are with you and yours Julianna.
    I wish you love and good times with your mom.
    Love from me and all my family.
    That's a lot of love right there! smile

  49. ediggity profile image59
    ediggityposted 13 years ago

    Prayer sent.  You may also want to look into some Holistic alternatives for your mother.  God Bless.

  50. Mighty Mom profile image78
    Mighty Momposted 13 years ago

    We are all grateful to be included in your circle of trust! That is what community is for -- to help and support each other. What a gift to have a global hug whenever you log on to HP!!
    Those of us who have walked this path ahead of you (in whatever variation) see your strength and grace and know you are doing an amazing job for your mom. She knows it, too.
    It will bend you but it will not break you.
    Much love to you and prayers of peace for your mom, MM

    1. Druid Dude profile image60
      Druid Dudeposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      Lost my mom to cancer in 06. My wife is a survivor. In most cases, early detection is key. I won't give condolences, because you never know what might happen. Just don't give up hope. Peace.


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